Can anyone share your experience in fighting against depression and anxiety? Sorry Mod, I tried to search in mental group but it seems to be active long ago so posted in serious /k.

I feel like roller coaster for the past 6 years, recently my condition is getting severe. I only took my medication for the 1st year then stopped, these few years tried on self control. I've been keeping myself busy, further studies, start up business, work harder, religion supports, but my emotions stil unstable while controllable.

Recently my condition worsens drastically so decided visit physiatrist 2 days ago. I told my dr that I just want to get my monkey mind a good rest. However after the medication, I couldn't work as my mind is totally numbed, knackered and nausea. Due to the side effects, I throw up like nobody business today.

I'm meeting my physiatrist again next monday to see if can solve my root cause to ease my conditions. I try not to be dependent on sleeping pills. Basically 2025 my most important plan is religion support, continue workout, further studies again (new title), pick up my old hobbies. Love myself more as I've been neglecting myself. I not sure if keeping myself busy works for my conditions? Most probably no more business again this year as I'm really out of hand.

Can I have sharings of your journey? At least I know I'm not alone or maybe brainstorming on certain part I probably missed out. This point, I'm feeling very very very super duper sick, felt like standing side of a cliff and it really took me alot of courage to type this out because maybe there is other perspectives which im missing out. Please don't bash me. I just need help.

Mod may remove this topic if inappropriate here. Thanks.

Update 27/1 - No advice needed anymore. Its still long way to go.. Thank you sekalian.

This post has been edited by NinG: Jan 27 2025, 12:46 PM

This might be harsh, but worth it for you to see. Want more? You can view the video comment. Hopefully it help.


This post has been edited by marukopi: Jan 9 2025, 11:38 PM

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I believe you are just being stressed by your own "wrong" decisions in life = over-active or monkey mind. You may need to de-stress by correcting your decisions in life, eg no more further studies, no more risky start-up business, etc, at least for some time.

Since your psychiatrist have given you the "wrong" medication with bad side effects, try seeing a good, reliable and ordinary GP for the right medication for your mental issues = it's much cheaper.
....... Note that addiction happens after daily use of prescription psychotic pills for >1 month. The Tapering method can be used to slowly wean off addiction.

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyl...ms/art-20050987 - Stress symptoms: Effects on your body and behavior
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No fighting journey. Totally stressed out at work with no good prospect. Have been feeling extremely lethargic and dread going to work since few months ago. Any amount of off days also can't seem to replenish my energy. Don't feel like talking to anyone. Even started to lose motivation to exercise.

Doctor treats me like some MC scammer strawberry. I can feel my end soon.

many issues are actually inconsequential/not important and its usually just me deciding to feel shitty about it.
those that cant be helped like being stuck in the middle of gaza, cant be avoided but to feel bad. no idea on how to tackle those and i also have my own. do whatever lo, cry in sleep at night, punch something, find like minded friend to rant. i do all of it.

What religion supports you referring to? Most people have lost a connection to the Earth, which is.....easier to access than to God (for most people anyway).

Try hiking and spending time in nature. Living in an artificial environment like concrete jungle with nothing but money, and material concerns every day, plus being bathed in unseen microwave frequencies (EMFs) in such urban areas, can harm your well being.

This is not how humans were meant to live. And the root cause always goes back to this monetary system that we have adopted.

Diagnosed with bipolar depression with fam history of depression. You need to know your cause of depression first. And stop overthinking when you are alone, listen to comedy movies etc to laugh. Stop watching/listening to emo/sad songs/movies.

I can see you are easily swayed by external factors. Build up your internal confidence first. Like all prophets, be strong headed like a rock and no one can convert you

This post has been edited by NoComment222: Jan 9 2025, 11:49 PM

Maksud TS masih single? No someones you love or care or loving you to sharing?

medication i don't think is work for everyone

You need someone in touch , got warm , got blood help you go thru all this , Forum won't help you punya other than many opinion since everyone handing things differently

someone i know got 自闭症 she getting better by try having a pet and someone love her, understand her , i don't know how both of them solve it together the husband and wife , because they never told i never ask either , because i can understand how its like from a orphanage experience i do felling down and down and down , but I'm okay , getting better, walked out because i have someone irl can share, encourage, understanding, caring .

I don't know where you can find a person/community/support group, but i think you need someone to talk about it irl probably not here that my advice .

This post has been edited by zuozi: Jan 9 2025, 11:56 PM

you need a certified therapist not a psychiatrist necessarily. The medications you taken are just a coping business they had on you, the have no obligation to get you better because if they lose you as customer where's their money?

Been thru this also

How is your environment with your family? Colleague?
Staying alone ?

Medication now is sleeping pill?
Xanax + lexapro?

Body got any illness? Like body ache?
Work got any issue?

Need to sit down and do meditation..then clear your mind up, and take a paper, list down the most critical question that make you feel stress

1. Work? Boss sangat susah?
2. Debts?
3. Family relationship?
4. Heart feel empty?
5. Got health issue? Lymph node got jam until u very easy agitated?
6. Stomach and gut issue? Got gastric? Got eat timely? Not enough of proper food = no enough of Serotonin -> you will go anxiety and depression. Tats why lexapro is SSRI to reuptake that serotonin you are missing in your head.
7. Peer pressure? Tengok ktard everyday cakap 20k tered, friend got merrid, got wife got children, got house got car and you got nothing?


This post has been edited by Boomwick: Jan 10 2025, 12:03 AM

If the other half is supportive then is a positive but if they give more stress then it will be more worse lol

try vegan diet and have a hobby that can help you relax

Ts, exercises fixes depression.

1. Your heart will hate what it takes to be better. Start with walking. FORCE yourself to walk, use public transport, not just driving. Walking helps you to engage your body and brain where to go.

Depression is mostly a heart problem, medication doesn't solve heart problem but causes even more side effect. Unless depression anxiety runs in your fam, don't take. The pharma industry is evil and money driven, not mental health driven.

2. Talk to your good friends

Social support is so important. Ask old people secret to a long life, it's about social support. Find friends to talk to and encourage each other.



Anxiety is trying to control something that is out of your control. You see where the problem is.

1. Learn to let go.

As I write this, it's a reminder to ourselves to let go things we cannot control. We are not God so we don't play God. We do our part and pray for the best

2. Tame your monkey brain

I can relate this. Your monkey brain will kong kong kong what if and imagine the worse possible scenario. Truth is 80% of the time those imagined stuff won't happen. Our brain does this to defend ourselves from harm which is part of survival instinct but it can go extreme. So tame it.

Talk to your friends again. They won't have your monkey brain and will help you dissect the problem better


Look up to the sky and realize we are very tiny creature. World is so big. Our problems in our monkey brain is actually bacteria size small.

Life is very simple. We over complicate it.

This post has been edited by gashout: Jan 10 2025, 12:10 PM

I used to think of dying all the time last time.

Until I found my true love, I dicided to do my best live for longest so I can be with her as long as I can.

Maybe TS needs to try fall in love?

Yes I feel the pinch seeing my psychiatrist, it cost me RM500 this round. Not sure about next round. I will look for my family dr for 3rd visit. When I came out from his room, I was shocked seeing other patients which much more severe symptoms than me. It could be me, if I still neglect my siren.



I stopped exercise almost a week. Thus I decided go for a short gateway alone next week.

I'm buddhism. I do bow to buddha daily (my homework). Yes I do camping as well, I will purposely choose the place with no connection. I agree with hiking and nature because it's what I loved to as well. Thanks for the suggestion, I've forgotten about this.



Would you mind to further elaborate with "swayed by external factors" to me? Thanks

I'm no longer single, root cause of all of this is due to relationships. So both of us going to see physiatrist together next week to solve our problems.




True also. I was shocked when I made the payment. Consultation fees cost RM200. Medication RM300. But I know I need something to stop the monkey mind first. Thanks for the suggestion, will look out for therapist see if helps.

My current medication is vortiozetine and clonazepam. It does stopped my monkey mind, but my feeling is quite numb, stopped working for 2 days already. I told my dr thats why i dislike to take psy. Besides, I try to change myself not to ranting and negative to my close friends.
Yes I sit down and write, like i keep on writing these days. Questioning myself. I not sure if this the right way. However I must admit I'm terrible at meditation. Relationships is my root cause. Hopefully next session with dr can help a little bit. Current self control on mind is super weak. I'm too fatigue.



Yes agree.



I'm on going clean diet recently, my friend told me clean diet do affect emotions. Abit usure with this statement.

NinG

Go buy 100% dark chocolate. Snack on them after every meal.
Not nice but very good for depression.

Nutricraft or realfoodsources.

Then get plenty of sunshine around 10am sunshine where you can feel the heat. Min 20-30 minutes a day.

Get shoden ashwanganda. You can buy from bestvites.

Then get magnesium taurate or magnesium glycinate.

Don't just depend on meds.

That's what I did for my family member with depression. Now off meds already

I don't know what religion are you, but learn to start meditation.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jan 10 2025, 07:35 AM

Go thai massage to relax body and mind

Whenever I starts the monkey mind, I exercise. Recently stopped due to mind fatigue. Too tired until i able to sleep whole day. But the mind is restlsss, which caused me worst
Thanks for the encouragement, I will force myself to workout again. True, we complicated life, and life is too short to waste our time. I don't want to give myself too many excuses without trying.



Being in a relationship is the most tired thing I ever done. White flag for me. 放过我 T.T

This post has been edited by NinG: Jan 10 2025, 07:41 AM

Thank you for all the kind words, encouragements and suggestions. At the moment my mind is truly numbed and high level of fatigue. But I will slowly digest it.

For other lyn who experiencing this, you're not alone.

I had the same issue. but not until need medication.

Yes your plan is spot on. Religion is one of the way. find a bigger purpose in life.

workout also helps. join some events like those running events and set a goal to yourself. basically anything that keeps your mind off overthinking. I couldn't imagine myself living without sports because that is the only thing keeping me sane these days.

all the best TS. I wish you the best.

do not go to private, it's too expensive and will stress you even further.

go to government.

you can continue to see a psychiatrist in a govt hospital, it's only like RM1 or RM5 per visit.

The psychiatrist in the govt hospital can even arrange you to consult the clinical psychologist in the hospital. Perhaps, they might introduce CBT treatment for you.

You need both medication and therapy. The psychiatrist will know when is the right time to wean you out from the medication.

But at the first time, you need to find the root cause (this is the most important task to do). Looks like you have too many things to handle. You need to look into that.

Continue to get religion support if it helps.

The psychiatrist him/herself is also a form of support, so it's important for you to continue to see the psychiatrist (but not in the private hospital).

For me if i feel anxiety, i take things slow.
keep it simple and stupid. don't do another thing, and take care of your own needs first.
after calming down, only continue to tackle other things 1 by 1.

Why? If that relationship is tiring means he/she is not the suitable one for U.

Find one that fits Ur lifestyle and makes U comfortable with it.

Hi,
I have similar experience, had some issues with my IT consulting work circa 2020 and then I was on lexapro for like 6 months. Of course the mind keeps on looping back, can I get back the old job and pay, the life style, living like an expat etc. Spent a lot of time walking around a nearby park (was jobless for years but my circumstances allow it). So depending on your taste for physical activities, train as much as you want. I also solo hike at 5am, and did solo camp during that time (seldom do it now though, got a bit lazy since I felt better) .

In terms of religion, yes that part help a lot, not gonna preach to you to join anything, but just explain the component that helps if you're going to join one
A) you need to be in a smaller group, with consistent members, ppl that show good behaviours
B) some members are already in good shape, some may be in the same journey as you
C) the members have to share their struggle, and from there, you will notice, if your own issue is truly that big or it's partially from own imagination or bad internal monologue
D) summary of the result: from internal, you will notice that if other ppl are making progress you will feel the need to improve your own story. From external, other members may notice your improvement and mention it to you

Now I just do psrtime consulting works and trying to make my hobbies work (3d model). Your circumstances may be different, a lot of commitment etc. But if you can cut off some stuff that you don't need, do consider it. Don't let those silly post about how much money you need bothers you.

Bless you, friend.

Have you been prescribed by your Dr to Serotonin (ssri) before?

This post has been edited by jojolicia: Jan 10 2025, 08:51 AM

If this relationship is giving you hell, the only way out is to end it. No amount of medicine/exercise/religion or whatnot will help if you continue with this relationship.

Apparently many here don’t understand what anxiety and depression are. Many are telling you to stay positive, don’t think so much, exercise and etc, don’t really know that anxiety and depression are actually some form of nervous disorder, where our body is not able to control the nervous system mechanisms. Therefore, even though we know we should think positive, go exercise, relax.., we are still unable to do it.

That’s where psychiatrist comes in, diagnose and prescribe medication. With the help of medication, we can bring back our nervous system into a more balance situation, and then we can start to strengthen our nervous system by practising mindfulness, meditation, exercise.
Once our nervous system becomes stronger, we will feel better and recover from it.

Thanks, above comments are mainly slef inflicted stress, depression on the other hand occur for no reason whether u like it or not.

That is better as you can identify this problem as the root cause of your issue. I dont know your gender, and also your type of relationship you are in, but relationship problem can basically be categorized into a few or a mixture of a few.

1. Cheating issue and trust issue
2. Money issue, other half spending and you are slaving and paying until sien kao liao
3. Verbal issue, talk very lanciao and hurting
4. Abusive and got fight and hitting
5. Family no supportive but you both still together
6. A mixture of above

I am not professional, but identifying the true root cause will help you tackle this. After you have identify it, then you need to inform the other side. Must be honest upfront telling he or she the root cause. Must be specific.

If it is cheating and trust issue, happen again and again, and you cannot take it, then chop it off
If money, can talk on spending behavior

If verbal, list down what kind of reply and speech will hurt you, and tell the other half how they should reply you in order not to hurt you, in a respectable fashion. Example, by adding, "do you think this a better option in front" and also telling other side not to get angry if you decide your way instead of their way

If abusive and fight, cannot take it, then chop it off


=======

While you try to drown your own in work, exercise, or wadever activities, the continuous repeatative hurt and insult might have put your mind in a state of "recalling those hurtful moment", and then your mind continue to dig deeper into it and keep thinking and getting worst and become depression and anxiety, hence the doctor prescribe you the medicine which slow your mind down into thinking too many things. But the side effect is, you will become too dependant on it, and got those side effect.

A better change to it is to practice your mind thoughts, as when your mind think about those bad moment, you need to shift it away by not drilling into it..it will kill your soul.
One of my ways is to listen to gospel soul music, those that preach to your heart and mind and affirming your life and soul and heal your wound. Make your eyes look at those lyrics, your mouth sing it out, and your brain process those words, then you will divert your mind into digging deeper to those depressive thoughts.

If you are a guy and had not been crying, maybe is time to cry it out loud and shed those tears out. It is totally alright to cry, you can start by crying out aloud as you listen to gospel soul music that heals your heart.

Write down the process flow in a paper and look at it as a manual tat when you are going into such, then what you need to do next to take it away from going into that. It takes practice to exercise your mind and brain..

I hope my sharing will help you a little bit by not being dependable solely on medicine. Medicine does help, but fully depend on it is not the solution. But to come out of it will be the best

You need to fix your gut, fix your sleep and fix your lifestyle.

Depression and anxiety is not just emotional and mental but all interrelated with your physical and spiritual as well.

Go search on gut brain axis first and HPA axis disruption.

Fix your gut first. Fix your gut first

TS already identify relationship as main cause..

Thats a contributing factor..major or minor. There are a lot more contributing factor TS is aware or unaware of. Insight only can be gained with knowledge. If the mind and body is strong, emotion will be more resilliant.

This post has been edited by fist_Aileron: Jan 10 2025, 10:57 AM

If the other half not willing to help at all is time to temporary move on without them, that the reason i advice TS go for support group/community/woman house etc

Medication example for hbp if the person don't want change or getting improve the person will forever using hbp medication not gonna solve the problem at the end

Interact with the right person/groups , those sound/joy/tear's/voice/is real and you can feel it that what make ppl relief/temporary let go for who i am/ppl can find alternative exit through all this support group since those feeling is real/is there/they understand/

the idea all this community is to accept/admit/ you need help, you don't want hide , accept who you are right now, temporary let go the previous you .

My time in orphanage from time to time we do visit all this community house, NGO house, to share our experience and feeling with other, doesn't matter what your background

Sometime human don't always interact with other or they really don't talk about it probably is feel malu,羞耻,or whatever reason is like example damm I'm a successful man is so xia sui to tell ppl i have this problem because the successful man worry how other think about him, like you're weak, loser etc negative thinking , in support group they listen, they don't judge , they help you overcome it.

That why i insist and advice TS seeking alternative help from this community support group i mention , sometimes you'll find someone have more bad life than yours, more bad experience than yours for the moment probably you can feel relief because I'm not the one is suffering , then when you try lend out your help to help the other still suffering sometimes things can improve

That my experience, if you have no idea what my long wall of text talking about just forget about it because i know my england is so broken .

ts got try to bela pet ?

Do u have gastric issues? Both are interlinked with depression

Anything regrets in your life that keeps popping up ?

there are many areas when it comes to therapy. Find a person to identify your symptom you will need a prolonged session ie trauma release when it comes to self limitation kind of thing, dont pay money onto something that didnt serve you just because of sunk cost fallacy

How old are you TS if mind asking ? Early 20/30 or late 20/30.

By the way as another member said you need a psychologist/counsellor/therapist because physiatrist will just keep giving you pills to temporarily rest your mind. You need to solve the root cause to this. If relationship is the issue, perhaps look for couple therapy. I wish you well.

I went to my usual GP and was prescribed Xanax. I am almost to the point of abusing it because the dosage given to me no longer works. I don't really depend on it now because I still have to face my issues the next day.

I am in my late 30s here and dealing with stagnant life (in every aspect)
I feel like I have to live this way on autopilot until my last breathe for my sanity. Sometimes when the body and mind can no longer take it, you will be numb automatically as a way to cope.

Rest your body, sleep. Wake up in the morning and exercise. Has a plan daily/weekly/monthly/yearly with goals and targets.

Identify what makes you happy before.
Identify what makes you unhappy/sad/regrets from past.

Write down your emotions and feelings. Keep a diary.

TS can try taurine and l-theanine supplements. Magnesium glycinate too.

If the above does not help, can also take a look into issues related to undermethylation and try to fix it with vitamin B supplements, especially B1, B2, B9 and B12.

Not a medical advice btw.

If depression is caused by outer factor, need to get rid of toxic people or things first

Take a very long holiday, several days best getting closer to nature.
Disconnect with all the socmeds, freeze FB or whatever.
Alleviated most, if not all, of my mild depression during my past.

https://mentari.moh.gov.my/self-test/

Based on the tests, currently I'm having another one again, since becoming a young parent all the worries are creeping in (kid's future, current employment stability vs financial capacity, own parents aging and falling sick etc).

Trying to "man up" still manageable, I only hate that it's becoming easier to lose my patience, easily annoyed and getting enraged by things that used to have no effect on me last time.

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If your partner is giving you stress (eg toxic relationship), it's best to get out of the relationship if there are still no solution or no change on his part.
....... If so, you had made a wrong life decision by entering into the relationship with him. Banks do credit history checks, salary checks, etc before extending huge loans to a person, eg home loans. Girls/women should do similar before entering into a romantic relationship with a boy/man, eg no seggs for the 1st 6 months' of dating, background checks with his acquaintances, eg work colleagues (not with his family and friends who are likely biased), observes how he treats outsiders like waiters, etc.

It's natural for a girl/woman to feel depressed when her bf/husband is giving her emotional problems and not vice versa, because girls/women fall in love emotionally with their partner but boys/men mostly only fall in lust with their seggs partner.
....... So, it's foolish for a girl/woman to take antidepressants when her romantic relationship becomes problematic and depressing.
....... Depression = sadness = usually caused by a sad situation or event, eg kena scammed online - losing RM thousands, kena hospitalized, family member hospitalized or passed away, struck by natural disaster like monsoon floods, etc = may need some time to recover or recover by getting out of that depressing/sad situation = becomes at peace, happy or contented.

In life, there is karma-is-a-beeetch, "we reap what we sowed", just desserts, the Law of ni4ni, the Golden Rule, etc (see my signature).
.

This post has been edited by lurkingaround: Jan 10 2025, 02:50 PM

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AFAIK, government psychiatrist, need to queue and wait for weeks to get an appointment = monkey mind may be already "dead" before the appointment date.
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= the cure for your depression and anxiety/insomnia is to get out of the tiring relationship.

= only enter into a happy romantic relationship.
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Agree. Medications can be a cope
my relative had depression over 2 decades and they still havent changed themselves completely aka being a victim in every aspects of their lives. Lose money, lose respect lose job lose friends as well

A total delusion and downward spirals

Hapy romantic relationship.. while there are real one.. but many dont last.. syiok sekejap, when come to life reality and commitment, all become caoniabu already when cannot get with it

that's a misconception of having to wait long

you will be surprised how fast they will call you for an appointment.

maybe for other departments, then i'd agree with you but it is quite fast for psychiatry dept, maybe because not many ppl are aware of the need to see a psychiatrist and not many patients as in other departments.

Thanks for the input. I didn't thought of going GH. This is a good alternative choice.

No...



Yes that's why we will go for 1st session next week.



I told my dr yes I want the monkey mind to be control first before my condition worsens, my symptoms is getting severe and affected my life.

I do agree the influential with positive groups .

.
How fast is your fast in getting an appointment to see a psychiatrist at a government hospital.?
....... AFAIK, the fastest is about 2 weeks after referral from a private psychiatrist or clinic GP doctor or RM1 KKM/govt doctor, except for emergency psychotic cases.

https://www.ramlimusa.com/cara-mendapat-raw...akar-psikiatri/ - Cara Mendapat Rawatan Pakar Psikiatri di Kuantan dan di Malaysia Amnya
by Prof Dr Ramli Musa - 27 June 2018
.... Rawatan di klinik swasta ada kelebihan. Antaranya tidak perlu menunggu lama untuk temujanji pertama. ...
.

This post has been edited by lurkingaround: Jan 10 2025, 02:24 PM

Depression and anxiety ruined my life. Quit my studies and work because of it. Now I'm just rotting away at home crying how my life would've been different if I'm not sick. Gonna be 32 this year with nothing to show. I just smoke away so that I can get heart attack. For me there's no way out. I hope you will find a way out.

Hello, i do read all helpful inputs, but maybe due to medications. Mentally quite exhausted to answer all. Because I sleepy whole day. I did read, just take some times to digest.

From what I know is one week after giving in your letter. Unless u go those hospital in the city centre, then probably a longer waiting time.

perhaps you did not live your life according to your inner voice.

I have been through your situation, still on medication with gomen hospital.

if you know chinese, you can listen to Dr Hsu Tien Sheng video on youtube, and pick up meditation, that helps me a lot, I also practise qi gong, that also helps.

We may not have the same issue but you are not alone.
I am not a normal person. I am going to be 39y this year with ntg. Life has been stagnant in every aspect. Feels like trapped since born. Often wish I could be diff like everyone else.. achieving some milestones in their life. The only way out is to accept it is what it is by changing perspective or just wasting away..
I am in between and it is a struggle.

Hey thanks. It's nice to know I'm not alone. Really appreciate it.

I'm in between too and it's hard. Giving up is playing in my mind most of the time

This post has been edited by lovecats: Jan 10 2025, 03:53 PM

TS, could you elaborate on the second statement, it seems like its a huge contributing factor to your depression and anxiety

Not to worry. Personally I have seen a few close people with anxiety/depression and with professional psychiatrist treatment, they are all well and back to normal daily life.

Hi ning, and others with similar issues
Just to add on a bit,
A) you mention repeatedly that you have a monkey brain (adhd, ocd as well? ) issue and you want to resolve that first. Just my comments, just be open that you may need to resolve some other deep rooted issue.
B) some commenter here focus on psychological help with medical, but never really described their own personal experience
C) as someone that went to usmc for a while, I can tell you that you will likely (ymmv) experience a clear difference in the beginning due to a combination of meds (most likely some anti depressant of the ssri type, some sleep/relaxant combo, etc). But eventually I don't really feel it's impact anymore after my other solutions become stronger.
D) don't put too much expectations on the psychology part, I didn't at least. I will leave this part for you, depending on how much fund you have (consulting charges).
E) use multiple solutions at once. 2 or more ways to win, no way to lose.Mental, physical, family/friends (reliable ones) and spiritual (this one hits hard for me)
F) create a routine that you can do consistently, and don't drop off. Even I feel like depression creeping if I got lazy in certain aspects

Have a blessed day

This post has been edited by Ruris: Jan 11 2025, 10:35 AM

Thank you too.
If the decision or things are life changing events (at least for me) then I guess it will take time or not.
I have been in this position for the longest time. Sometime I feel like if I don't make any changes then I will live a life like this until death takes me. Therefore it isn't a normalcy. Other ppl have it easily.
Been to counsellor for almost a year. Not sure whether is my issue or her but things are still stagnant.
I am still the same before and after meeting her. Like a high schooler only broken and older.

This resonate with me so much. This is me for a long time.

I'm assuming you are male. Contemporary psychologist / counsellor unfortunately does not do much to help males because we are men of action, we must take action to solve the root cause of our issue which often is not easy, if feasible at all. Unlike women can often talk their way out and let the issue fixes itself.

I assume your counsellor is probably the kind that tells you don't worry be happy there are people have it worse than you tomorrow will be better that kind of cliche stuff.

Sorry if I'm wrong on my assumptions. But take care regardless

1 thing I learned is not to stop taking the medication because "I'm feeling better now, I think I'll do fine". It is rookie mistake.

I have accepted that my brain needed something extra just to make me able to function like regular people. At first it feels like I'm some sort of pussy that not able to rawdog the world. But then I realized, this pills are sort of 'crutches' for my mental - just like people with broken bones need external support. So it's nothing wrong needing to take medications to help with what you're lacking.

So far this time is the longest time I stick with the appointments - it has been a little more than a year and half now. First diagnosed probably a decade ago, with symptoms appearing way earlier than that. I can say for sure that I do definitely feeling better.

Counsellor that I went to only listen to me venting. When things get stuck for so long, it may become permanent. I am quite resenting how my life turns out. I cant blame anyone as it is my choice. I have a choice and I chose to stay in it. So I only get to pick "suck it up or leave"

Yes. Invalidation. My friends did it more.

For me, if I have problems, I will keep on finding way to solve it. It maybe good, maybe bad.

May I know hows the environment at gomen? I can't accept the environment at GH and KK.

I think we all achieve milestones at certain part. Like me, currently Im quite stagnant in my career, but its what I want, work life balance.
This 3 months I've been actively cycling, just hit 200km ride yesterday. That's an achievement for me. What pushed me further is, start small, just do it.

Please don't give up. For so many times I feel like dying, I tell myself, just give it last shot.

I've been giving out alot in a relationship especially money, thus I will have high expectations, perhaps same return. We are totally different personality and family background. However, I realised that I couldnt change a person. For now, I just want to make a peace to the old story, acceptance of different human personality.

Yes. Hopefully.
That day when I came out from the room, I saw other patients which conditions much more severe than me. Like totally cannot themselves, lying on the chair with unknown, another one keep on blinking her eyes.

Hello Ruris. I dont have OCD, or ADHD. I always try to understand my own feeling, reflecting myself. But I do get some cooling period to make sure I dont confused my own feelings. However I think this time the medication is quite impactful that I became forgetful. Normally I will tell my psychiatrist what do I think, what I wanna do next and ask for opinion. Don't feel like wasting our time and money.

She asked me how I feel for the session today. I told her: It was getting tense, and my anxiety level is getting up.
Its really mind fatigue after the session and I slept whole afternoon again.

In reality life, when I without my partner, Im truly ok. But when with him, everything became uneasy again. I guess that's the part need to be fix.

True, I agree that medication is important, dont stop because Im feeling better. I did that 7 years ago.

And I also learned that we must express our feeling, hiding emotions will lead to bigger boom.

..

This post has been edited by Epci: Jan 13 2025, 08:58 PM

Yes I think before, when I search back the drug name. I cant remember clearly as it was too long ago.



If Im not married, yes I can end it immediately.



Yes you got on point 1, & 2. Yes I write to break down my thoughts, my feeling as the medicine side effects hit me quite hard for this time.
At a point when I feel so monkey mind, I workout like day and night, twice daily until I really drained myself.




I used to have pet. But after she died, I really can't have new pet anymore. Same but different.



Yes I just finished one course of nexium. Does this affect?

This post has been edited by NinG: Jan 13 2025, 08:20 PM

Thanks all. After 7 days medication I'm better. So I try to reply all when I'm ok. As medication hit hard on mind, I get fatigue easily and forgetful. Today just finished 1st session so, next week will meet up again with my Dr. I got some thoughts in my mind already, need to f2f discuss with her to see how to improve the situations.

Just curious you all depress due to GF, foreveralone, feel life too average, feeling old like those 30s 40s only few decade life yet achieve nothing.

True. From my experience it is unlikely a single factor will cause depression. Need multi factors combine to cause depression

Yes I've been forcing myself to workout. Until my workout is improving like lighting speed.

Indeed letting go is important, I want to make peace to the past. Wanted to discuss with my Dr next round on this topic.

Maybe you can elaborate more on taming the monkey brain part to me?




Thanks, I will try it out. So far in our list I done on sunshine part. Supplements not yet.



I have one friend say the exactly same thing. Problem is people touch my body, but my mind still monkey inside.

I must admit that my mind is weak. Always try to have mind > emotion. Some years I do feel good, but when the bad moment returns, feel like all my hard work to have strong mind ruined again in a second.



Im in my mid 30s, imagine I started in lyn since 2005. 20 years passed.

What do you mean by stagnant? Or perhaps, in other words, you got a simple life.

Try going out frequently. No need to spend any money when you go outside

I mean, just walk around the park, or anywhere else.

It's part of activity that can reduce the depression and anxiety

So u are M and other half is F
Got issue 1 & 2 la..

Huhu..
This one issue 1 & 2, only solution is upfront tell ur other half on it..

If she cannot change, then you have to change for your own betterment..

Goodluck.. hope will turn out good

TS you quoted this in one of your reply.

"In reality life, when I without my partner, Im truly ok. But when with him, everything became uneasy again. I guess that's the part need to be fix"

Have you thought of a cooling period without him, not under same roof? You are married, any kids?

depends on which hospital you go, I going to Kajang one, small hospital.

one thing for sure, parking is bad, treatment is cheap RM5, just that every time my appointment, I am seeing diff doctor :X

Yes this week Im off from base.




Opposite, Im female.




Its my thought as well. I've been telling him I want to move back to my parents house, and I do tell my Dr too, she told me that perhaps will worsens because I tend to runaway, its not solving the problem. We got one child, my intention try not to affect my kid. For this week, I can temporary let this go this topic as Im out for business trip for a week.