Good piece, some highlights:

that why many bullshet, make child n throw it to grandparent

or hire full time maids, childcare or send to tahfiz

regret not having baby at old age or regret have a baby during young age?

which regret runs deeper?

Carl Schwab sponsored this piece ?

Life is hard, but life has a noble purpose.
But this is lost in the generation of social media and radical feminism. Why can't I have all the nice things my Instagram friend are having.

For me its nothing to regret about. It is fulfilling and it is purposeful. It is tough , yes but if you are the kind that gets satisfaction seeing tough work done, its worth it.

having the baby itself is already a regret
it's not a toy, they realized how bad it is after few months

those that think it through and through end up with pets instead

else end up like a thread yesterday...saying life is tough because his baby is coming up....without realizing it's a choice, not compulsory

This post has been edited by MR_alien: Apr 24 2024, 09:19 AM

I also felt that such regret is a temporary thing. I got friends who jumped into bandwagon of having kids because their peers had kids as well. Most regret during the initial years. But now like normal already. I guess it’s the hassle of taking care of small kids.

If regret, your fama shouldn't give birth to you too.

Mau regret apa? I’m very happy to see my daughter is now a pok-pok chui young woman, the stuff that /k salivates over, and my son entering his teenage years to become a handsome young man, much like his father.

spoilt brat trying to be parents of course failed la

what if the grandparent pressure their children for grand kids

justify right to throw it at grandparent.

Drillz for pok-pok chui daughter mana?

when u are young u regret having children...

when u are old.. u will regret not having children

Don’t want lah, otherwise may get targeted like raynman’s Kristie.

If she come Malaysia she will be happy. Parents here just let their kids grow like wild grass, got government to take care. Just corn kek buat anak tak perlu jaga.

i believe it depends on scenario, if it's the 1st baby you have after 5 - 8 years and thousands of tries, you wont have regret, bcoz you know how hard it is to get 1. if you marry late and conceive, some will have regret because you wont have sufficient energy to take care of the child, everyday you would be tired and if your spouse doesn't help, it make it worst. not to mention the freedom that you used to have are basically gone. if you share that freedom together with your child might turn the table, but some people enjoyed freedom alone or with their spouse but not with their child, by making it worst, they might find it potong stim and ruin their holiday/ relaxation. i'm not ashamed to say, my wife is one of them.

if marry too early also will have regret because you would loose out many things in life. Except you really bercita cita to give birth, take care and love your children for your rest of your life would be a different story.

probably age 27 to 31 to have children would be good imo.

I dont think ppl will have regrets hving kids....especially when at night u look at their beautiful eyes when they are sleeping...

Instead, after electing to be a stay-at-home mother, Robin found herself in what she calls “the domestic gulag,” a life that consisted of being “a chauffeur and an arranger and an appointment setter and a social secretary and a party planner and a chef and a meal planner and a budgeter” and “an emergency nurse and a night nurse and a psychologist and a confidant.”

What is wrong with that? That's call being a mother and taking care of another human being.

She prefers to party all the time instead?

Apa regret.

Man up, no need to regret. It is your choice, keep moving forward.

this statement alone already shows you're thinking from your POV and not the child's POV which most parents are

Senior citizen that lives in retirement home are mostly full with seniors with kids

Some of them their kids never visit or care about them

So these people regret having kids?

Second quote sounds like never had any hardships before being a parent

That’s scary. Kids sleeping with eyes open like fish

hello polis....

how the hell you look at their eye during their sleep when their eyes are shut?


except they opened their eyes to sleep.

Better dont have children if want to stay here

Socks issue can become major world headline

I'm sorry to say this sir but your kid isn't sleeping.

You can always raise them to migrate overseas to earn 3.5 or 4.7

anak saya baik olangnya

Then migjt as well you prepare yourself and migrate there then only have children

A lot of pubic got it wrong. It is not the task of present generation alone themselves to raise the children. Raising the children, you need the combination of 3 generations - there is proverb stating "it takes a village to raise a child". If any of these elements are missing, you will experience the extreme condition to raise the children.

If the elder generation refuse / not willing to help the current generation in raising a next generation, thing is a lot more difficult. If you have elder parent who loves the children, raising the younger generation will be much more easier. No new parent have the experience to raise the children except the previous generation - this is the fact.

What is scarce nowadays is the "quality time". The period of raising the children from new born to 3 ~ 4 years old is the most tedious & difficult. It will drain away a lot of you daily energy if the mother is working + no one is helping out. If you experience this, you will be certain to think twice to have another newborn & repeat the process again. This process itself creates fear even to the couple earning decent living.

Nowadays, a lot of the previous generation emphasis on freedom of living, asking them to take care their grandchildren is a no no as they will feel that their time will be "binded" toward the commitment.

Those who have the previous generation who loves the children & willing to do anything for their grandchildren are the most blessed couple out there.

This post has been edited by nihility: Apr 24 2024, 10:05 AM

Lol. Are you sponsored by big pharma and ultra rich. They are running out of workers + users to generate money for them.
Best to keep breeding so we can make money for them.

Sarcasm aside, shows that you're not just delusional but also very out of touch because you think only your opinion is valid. Surely because you had a life with no regrets, other's should be the same too.

u see one retirement home u think all kids are char siew?

without kids, definitely u need to go retirement home if you need attentive care.
or you are rich enough, u can hire full time nurse at home.

with kids, there is 50/50 chance your kids will take care of you.
it depends on how you bring up your kids.
you just ignore the kids of course the kids wont take care of you.

some ppl assume if there is no kids, they will sure become rich and millionaire after awhile.

It might be true that you can spend all your hard earn money for yourself, but it does not necessary become rich when you old.

There are cases whereby the parents get better loiving because of their kid doing well

My mistake...I meant their closing eyes...

I am referring to their closing eyes...so yeah they are sleeping :-)

Earth already overpopulated, it’s actually a good trend that some chose not to have children to slowdown the unsustainable population growth.

Maybe one day we just let sentient AI to be human’s legacy to this blue planet.

Pictures unload popok chui

There's a very active subreddit and a huge facebook group on regretful parents.
Think twice before you piap lol.

Most CF people don't regret not having kids when older because they never wanted it in the first place. It's like you have never liked spicy food and then regret not eating spicy food for dinner.

Can piap but shoot out not in

people failed at parenting, thus regret

i don't know about you guys.

but my 22 month baby sometime just out of nowhere come and hug me and say love you.

if i am hurt or saw any part of my body bleeding, she will just go and sayang that part.

every night without fail, light off she will say night night and love you to both of us before tido.

i don't even know if she understood what it was or not.

anyway, it was the best gift i can ever have.

This post has been edited by a13solut3: Apr 24 2024, 10:32 AM

not making sense, but now if want kid can just order by surrogate. but costly lh... like this just extinct lh human...

there's no problem not being a parent as ultimate purpose
some people are just not equipped to be a parent there's no need to force

1 regret, still can change. The other you are stuck for life.

nowadays don't talk about 1 area/section/ village 1st, just your left and right neighbor do you really build good relationship with them? Many doesn't, don't know them is 1 thing, don't even talk or greet but want to geh poh matters of others is worst. i'm lucky my neighbors are quite friendly as long you are friendly and chill. my children even interact with them.

i'm a father of 2... of course i know their rebellious stage but i still have to prepare myself for their teen rebellious stage even my elder son who is 6, still quite rebellious at times but i know it's bcoz he is scared that he fail to achieve 1 matter. my young son is 4 and everyday still dealing with drama but i'm very grateful he has stopped pampers and pacifier earlier than many kids, even than his brother.

if my in law still around, i know my kids will be spoiled to rot, especially my in laws loves boy than girl. my parent are still working as it's their business thus is a no no. once a while play around is ok. for now we are still doing our best for our children with minimum helps from others. but still i'm grateful that my in law's maid is helping to take care of my monkeys during weekdays.

could be changelings.

I know many ppl who regret having kids la, after membiak, life goes downhill.

Because of taboo, they don't share publicly. You have to be close to them for them to open up.

Oi!

My parents and grandparents failure remind me not everyone is suitable to be parent including myself

problem is the kid is carsiew. mentally challenged from the get go, although physically abled...surprise muthafarka!

Yeah sorry, fark ofr. You membiak, you jaga.

Other people got other shit to handle, your child is not the problem of others.

If can't take care jangan membiak. Old people have suffered enough raising kids, they want their freedom and time off too.

for now still an angel, after 3 years old here comes the devil if after 3 years old yet still an angel, you are one of the luckiest father

all i can say is enjoy and cherish the moment as long as you can.

the thing with these kind of articles its usually some form of echo chamber. usually biased and leaning to whatever the article's agenda is trying to promote

theres no doubt there will be disenchanted parents, but likewise there are also doting parents

the main thing one has to do before having kids as usual is think of how much time and energy will be required to care for them in the first 5-10 years. do proper planning on this, dont just "ill see as i go"

many reasons why people get sick of kids was they never prepared for the amount of shit (no pun intended) they need to deal with. as if dealing with own life and spouse isnt a big issue already, now involve another 3rd or 4th party lagi GG

setting proper expectations helps alot

the feeling of regret will eventually comes up at one point. But more importantly is ; Is the feeling still around after a while or not?
is it a constant feeling that you feel every time you think of your children? Is there not even a time that you feel grateful for having family?

This post has been edited by hteekay: Apr 24 2024, 10:53 AM

as a poorfag b40 i will never consider to have baby
unless i become rich first

aiya we all went through that playful, then rebellious phase. i guess discipline need to be taught from early.

mine is playful, i rarely raise my tone with her, but when i raise my voice, she knew she is in trouble and stopped whatever tantrum she's on include crying.

When life was simpler:
- low cost of living (1 parent working is enough)
- no internet/social media (people tend to show off their success and/or "fake" lives)
- people could easily get along where 3R was never brought up

Maybe getting a kid in such an environment is ok but these days, so many unhealthy things going around.

if u choose to have kid and later regret it, u suck it up
if u choose not to have kid and later regret it, u suck it up

simple as it is

its hard for me to have kids, so please be grateful for God's given gift.

1 is enough

Children for what ?

LOL I thought you are referring to parents of ktards lolol🤣🤣

many people today still has that mindset children is there to take care of you when you're old




without realizing that they themselves also have trouble staying afloat

These people fail to realize having kids is a choice, not a must.

Why everything must follow what society say?

Study, work, get married, membiak, mampus.

Is that it? You only got 1 shot at life and you waste it away follow what everyone else is doing or asking you to do

as a parent, i feel that i've finally grownup, karmic full circle now that my kids are teens...and i'm relating alot of what i went through as a kid from my kids, and same with my parents. This has given me a new appreciation to my family members. So no regrets here from me, i'd still have kids, more if i can and i'd do it differently if i'm able to turn back time

true, throw to grandparent and only take care of their child at night on weekdays then full day only on sunday

but post fb and tell the whole world: its so hard being a parent, but mommy papa love u my baby, no ragrat having kids

This post has been edited by GiganticBird: Apr 24 2024, 11:15 AM

Strawberry betul

single sole q

all kids here born the same?

child is not burden, i view child as gift from god. we tried ivf for 2 years still x jadi, we plan to adopt

This post has been edited by milky12388: Apr 24 2024, 11:20 AM

A lot of those that regret are due to not being prepared. They have no inkling on how to be a parent or different expectation of the child.

Last time got own parents stay with you so they teach and help you. Now is all yolo style.

Pls go google, youtube and learn how to be a parent. Learn the basics what need to do and things to prepare. It's a lifelong learning skill.

The kid will only bother you for 20 years, that's only a quarter of your life. Cherish it.

i've seen more happy childless old folks than old folks with many children who dumped them in old folks or go overseas and never visit eventhough dying in hospital beed

that's assuming he won't be char siew for the 1st 20 years, and the rest of his live

how bout 'no'.
It's true any loving grandparents will want to participate and this do help, but It's not the grandparents 'task' per se.
They can participate when they are willing and available, but it should not be expected to.


Congratulations.
It's a reflection of you and your partner for being lovely and caring.
Of course personality is a thing that born with, she's naturally more lovely but that is only 1 side of a human being, and human are much more complex.
Be ready to find out in other department that she's lacking and ready to help her with those, like she could be later on too soft, afraid of confrontation, lack of competitiveness, unambitious and prefer stable life. (Im not saying she is, just example and not necessarily a bad thing also if she' cruising well in life).
What i meant is people wont be perfect, don't be contended for how lovely she is now, but still strive to give her guidance in all ways of life, so she can be great and well balanced.

Happy for you.

most likely the parents are charsiew too.
Charsiew doesnt grow one day, is a bbq'ing process of continuously many many years.
I've been observing many many years, people been roasting charsiew themselves, and guess who have to face the consequences the most?

Yeah, wasting money and stopping ur dream…try said that again when u have pass u prime at 50 and see u regret for not having kids or not ,lolx

This post has been edited by swanlover: Apr 24 2024, 11:25 AM

Lmao, what kind of logic is this? God clearly doesn't want you to have kids since it's a "gift from God" and you disobey your god by adopting?


Saya putar halim

no regret having childrens

only regret is getting married

No, nowadays we hardly know our neighbors due to a lot factors :-

1) time scarcity - ppl nowadays go to work before sunrise, come back home already sunset. Sometimes, even weekend need to work. With the time scarcity, we will emphasis more on the activities they can have with their families vs the activities with communities.

2) many ppl never treat their current living place as their staying place to raise > 3 generations. As a result, neighborhood harmony is the least of their priority. During major festive seasons, everyone rushing back to their village or hometowns, ppl within the neighborhoods hardly know each other traditions. Unlike the village / hometown, the friends & neighbors back then seem more closer.

3) Due to the neighborhood are not close, the sense of security also drops. We try to limit of children to interact around for the fear of their safety. Unlike the new village / new village, we get to know each family by the house number. Everyone will look after each another at smaller town / village.

It will takes awhile before this scenario take the changes for good. Our society will always self correct itself. Only we may not life long enough to witness the changes taking place.

Wait till you die or your other half die no one help to arrange funeral or carry funeral then you will know

Humans are truly confused being.

On one hand people shout, it is not OK to expect your kids to take care of you. They have their lives to live.

On the other hand same people shout, oh look that that poor old person alone in old folks home. See I told you having kids is a waste of time.

Mix. Sometime a bit but sometime feel its well worthy it.

When i look at my lil angel. Give my life purpose and strength.

How many cycles of ivf u did?

I'll say it is not compulsory because the present generation may need to respect the elder generation decision also. If the previous generation not willing, then the present generation must be ready for more tougher environment when raising their own kids.

That's why I mentioned, if you have the elder generation who are willing to do anything for their grand children, you will be the most blessed couple.

The former will never admit regret, to "save face". They will tell others at least they have freedom.

Who the fuck cares? You're already dead.

Funeral isn't for the dead, it's for the living.

Nobody wake up from death complain about funeral not done right lmao

I concur and am in the same boat. At least I haven't irrevocably traumatized the life of another like my parents and grandparents.

Some ppl want children to pass down their assets or business.

Yea. Wait till the spirits comes haunt you and bring you bad luck for the rest of your life then you will know.

How do u know that your kids will take care of you?

I've talked some of the senior citizen among chinese people, they are so proud telling me all of their kids are living & working overseas, while they are rotting here and depends on relatives help.

Their kids only come back once a year or no come back for a long period of time

Clearly their kids don't even care much about them. I'm sure going back to Malaysia for the currency they earn is just peanut to them.

That's not something to be proud at all.

This post has been edited by xpole: Apr 24 2024, 11:39 AM

yeah lol. saw it first hand many times.
Funeral is for the living, some need it to feel better about themselves.

Looking at many /k comment raising a child need commitment, energy, and savings for 1-2 decade, meanwhile I still wonder how B40 M race able to have so many kids and still able to survive

First few months when my son was born I almost fell into depression because of the sudden change in my life. I did have regrets.

But now I’m glad I have him in my life. He is 1 year 5 months now and he’s the most important person in my life. Seeing him after a tough day at work truly makes me happy.

Is he annoying sometimes? Yes especially when he’s having a tantrum. But at the end of the day I absolutely love having him in my life.

>2024 still believe in spirits and ghosts

Nigga gtfo. I challenge all the spirits and ghosts in this world to come haunt me.

Will update tonight if got any.

Sad right? More people gather when die rather than gather during living to enjoy the moment.

The dead gives no fuck about funeral.

too bad we are asians. if we are like angmoh and can kick the kids out of the house right when they are 18 then yes can have zero expectations from children.

the thing about asian families (esp chinese) are most of them couldnt care less on being taken care of their kids in the future after being old

their job is to raise their kids well so they would have a better life than their parents. then their parents will happily call it a day

it sucks really, but this is the reality. they view it as the "parent's responsibilities to their child"

ofc nowadays modern thinking are differing