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 RM10 chinese wedding dinner angpaos

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TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM, updated 6y ago

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I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?

amxpayne67
post Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM

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if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
SUSMarioKart
post Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM 100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
Blofeld
post Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM)
if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
*
nightshade_nova
post Feb 6 2018, 08:03 AM

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RM10 so cheapskate...
Those are ang pows you give to kids during raya.
smallcrab
post Feb 6 2018, 08:04 AM

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people short of cash now, CNY coming

so gip RM10 loh instead or RM100
acbc
post Feb 6 2018, 08:04 AM

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Previously I gave RM 20 because the meals were cold and bad. If hotels like Hilton, easily RM 200 per pax. Min also RM 50.
amxpayne67
post Feb 6 2018, 08:05 AM

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QUOTE(nightshade_nova @ Feb 6 2018, 08:03 AM)
RM10 so cheapskate...
Those are ang pows you give to kids during raya.
*
when you get invited to someone's wedding, and is pretty close to the bride and/or bridesmaid, you are torn between your commitment as a friend, your financial situation, your own personal problems. It is not you to judge someone is cheapskate based on the angpao they give for your wedding.

This post has been edited by amxpayne67: Feb 6 2018, 08:05 AM
ocphangaz
post Feb 6 2018, 08:06 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
people give what they can afford... what is the problem? blame the groom not choosing their guest properly.
ocphangaz
post Feb 6 2018, 08:08 AM

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QUOTE(nightshade_nova @ Feb 6 2018, 08:03 AM)
RM10 so cheapskate...
Those are ang pows you give to kids during raya.
*
RM10 for kids? kfc also need RM12 nowadays... RM10 for CNY is so cheapskate too... hari raya also people give RM10

how's that burn feel to you?
gumshoe101
post Feb 6 2018, 08:11 AM

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The fact that they come is good enough. I would rather not attend any wedding.waste my time.
bereev
post Feb 6 2018, 08:18 AM

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QUOTE(real lee @ Feb 6 2018, 08:11 AM)
rm10 is just plain cheapskate ler.i my self will put rm100.but ill drink alot too.so consider rm 100 fully utilize...and if no alcohol ill pack rm50 jer
*
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nightshade_nova
post Feb 6 2018, 08:20 AM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:05 AM)
when you get invited to someone's wedding, and is pretty close to the bride and/or bridesmaid, you are torn between your commitment as a friend, your financial situation, your own personal problems. It is not you to judge someone is cheapskate based on the angpao they give for your wedding.
*
If close then should be no problem. They will understand. Im just saying in general situation, independent of any extenuating circumstances.

QUOTE(ocphangaz @ Feb 6 2018, 08:08 AM)
RM10 for kids? kfc also need RM12 nowadays... RM10 for CNY is so cheapskate too... hari raya also people give RM10

how's that burn feel to you?
*
You said it yourself. RM10 also cant buy KFC, thats why its cheapskate.
Raya and CNY give to a lot of kids ang pows vs wedding which is one party only.


Bottom line is only the people who host the wedding's perception is important, not other people.
How important they are to you, how understanding they are, and how important it is that you want to keep a good image of yourself.

You dont tell how much you give, people wont know also.
amxpayne67
post Feb 6 2018, 08:22 AM

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QUOTE(nightshade_nova @ Feb 6 2018, 08:20 AM)
If close then should be no problem. They will understand. Im just saying in general situation, independent of any extenuating circumstances.
You said it yourself. RM10 also cant buy KFC, thats why its cheapskate.
Raya and CNY give to a lot of kids ang pows vs wedding which is one party only.
Bottom line is only the people who host the wedding's perception is important, not other people.
How important they are to you, how understanding they are, and how important it is that you want to keep a good image of yourself.

You dont tell how much you give, people wont know also.
*
that is why a lot of people hate to attend wedding ceremony. The so called "close" friend being understanding is really an understatement, because what happens behind the scene is badmouthing the guest based on their "gives / angpow".
mycolumn
post Feb 6 2018, 08:22 AM

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QUOTE(gumshoe101 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:11 AM)
The fact that they come is good enough. I would rather not attend any wedding.waste my time.
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SUSGlockers
post Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM

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Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!


99FoxDemon
post Feb 6 2018, 08:24 AM

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give any rm but all table full or minimum rm100 but only 2 table full?

which one they prefer? end of the day need pay all table they reserve also.
MR_alien
post Feb 6 2018, 08:27 AM

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QUOTE(ocphangaz @ Feb 6 2018, 08:08 AM)
RM10 for kids? kfc also need RM12 nowadays... RM10 for CNY is so cheapskate too... hari raya also people give RM10

how's that burn feel to you?
*
Rm10?
I'm still receiving RM2 these few years
HafeesFadil
post Feb 6 2018, 08:28 AM

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cukur la dpt 10. haha.

This post has been edited by HafeesFadil: Feb 6 2018, 08:28 AM
hcmalaya
post Feb 6 2018, 08:29 AM

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No money don't hold dinner la sohai
homicidal85
post Feb 6 2018, 08:35 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
all from the same guy. total rm150.
my grand uncle used to put rm2 in all his sampul raya. so when kids come, he would give you multiple sampul duit raya accoding to how much he wanted to give. im not too close so he gave me 3 sampul = rm2 x 3 = rm6 (back when I was a kid la). i guess it saves time doing it in mass production like this.
everest
post Feb 6 2018, 08:36 AM

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Bad economy
myasiahobby
post Feb 6 2018, 08:37 AM

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so he think wedding reception is an investment/business
andrekua2
post Feb 6 2018, 08:42 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
*
LOL...

Personally I dont get invited often because I will just ignore all those invitations via whatsapp/fb/wechat etc. If you need to invite via social media that just mean thats the sort of friendship we are having... not close enough to get invited.

BTW, what most people failed to realized is how hard life is for some people. You maybe earning 5k or 10k a month for your own usage only but not everyone have the same luxury. Some have kids to feed too. Not to mention housing/car loan. Do you have to invite because you are neighbours? My parents has so many neighbours that they grow up together. When I was getting married, they selectively invited those who are better off financially. Is it harsh? Not really. When you are so close with them, you just have to be frank. They maybe ashamed to bao RM50 since really known for tens of years, and you also dont have the financial to really bear all these losses. Just invite them to the buffet on the pre night.

I think people shouldnt simply invite friends or neighbours that they think they should invite. Just invite close friends and relatives. Make the banquet small-medium sized so that you have time to greet the them properly. The food also arrived faster. Then it will be a better experience for everyone. As of now, what I can say is chinese wedding banquet is a nightmare for most people.
jasonloke
post Feb 6 2018, 08:43 AM

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is like that lah, now economy also like that, if no money, don't buka wedding dinner and just have buffet only, atleast can cover some then make it fit to budget.
daus89
post Feb 6 2018, 08:46 AM

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the guests need to pay for their wedding is it?
bukan dapat piap bini dia pun
owai
xcxa23
post Feb 6 2018, 08:47 AM

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I don't see any wrong ..
Wedding dinner is about sharing happiness

And angpao is a sort of good luck/wishing u all the best. From wat I'm told, during grandma era, most angpao inside are hand written wishes..

They came and gip u wishes, it's all the matters.

This post has been edited by xcxa23: Feb 6 2018, 08:47 AM
popopi
post Feb 6 2018, 08:49 AM

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if u know who will give rm10.. then don't invite that person la... u think u can or not? ur face more important?
marcus_bread
post Feb 6 2018, 08:51 AM

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if they are from poor family then i think is OK, at least they come and cheer for u.
if they are rich and still give RM10 then abit no good.
Anyway there is no rule said that u must give how much for wedding dinner angpao, it is up to the courtesy of the guest.
Unless u write on the invitation card that angpao must be >RM100.
thebest2018
post Feb 6 2018, 08:51 AM

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bodo no mani dun marry la
wan big angpow put signboard notice la
xcxa23
post Feb 6 2018, 08:52 AM

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QUOTE(andrekua2 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:42 AM)
LOL...

Personally I dont get invited often because I will just ignore all those invitations via whatsapp/fb/wechat etc. If you need to invite via social media that just mean thats the sort of friendship we are having... not close enough to get invited.

BTW, what most people failed to realized is how hard life is for some people. You maybe earning 5k or 10k a month for your own usage only but not everyone have the same luxury. Some have kids to feed too. Not to mention housing/car loan. Do you have to invite because you are neighbours? My parents has so many neighbours that they grow up together. When I was getting married, they selectively invited those who are better off financially. Is it harsh? Not really. When you are so close with them, you just have to be frank. They maybe ashamed to bao RM50 since really known for tens of years, and you also dont have the financial to really bear all these losses. Just invite them to the buffet on the pre night.

I think people shouldnt simply invite friends or neighbours that they think they should invite. Just invite close friends and relatives. Make the banquet small-medium sized so that you have time to greet the them properly. The food also arrived faster. Then it will be a better experience for everyone. As of now, what I can say is chinese wedding banquet is a nightmare for most people.
*
Spot on bro
I'm even planning not to have wedding dinner.. I mean all if not most of it those so call relative and friends are 5 years dunno got meet once or not. Even if meet at street also nvr say hi

Might as well safe the money go for longer honeymoon..
But not sure if my other half will agree or not 😂
loui
post Feb 6 2018, 08:53 AM

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if mau set minimum price, put it in your invitation card

still can't beat my cousin who receive fake bank note

the unknown guest even take the initiative to scan RM50 notes and print it out
Paddy Teddington
post Feb 6 2018, 08:53 AM

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Chinese wedding dinners are the worst. Dinner always start late, food also not that nice, end late at night, somemore need to pay RM100. I can eat better food with that price. That's why I always straightaway say I can't attend and make up an excuse. cool2.gif

masamura
post Feb 6 2018, 08:56 AM

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If you ned to break even or make profit from a wedding, you don't deserve to hold that wedding. People should have the mindset that you make a loss if they intend to hold such thing.
TheReaderReads
post Feb 6 2018, 08:57 AM

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QUOTE(Glockers @ Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM)
Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!
*
rclxms.gif
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 08:57 AM

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i think 2-3 years back when my sister getting married and i was calculating the money on groom side..there ppl giving only rm20 many of them but guess they living in kampung or some sort not earning too much money end up have to cover back couple thousand
iGamer
post Feb 6 2018, 09:00 AM

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QUOTE(acbc @ Feb 6 2018, 08:04 AM)
Previously I gave RM 20 because the meals were cold and bad. If hotels like Hilton, easily RM 200 per pax. Min also RM 50.
*
WTH........... gave angpow only after eaten? U sure u went to chinese wedding? biggrin.gif
burn22
post Feb 6 2018, 09:01 AM

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nothin wrong!! it is still money!!
if nak harap return xpenses, better not open to many tables...

acbc
post Feb 6 2018, 09:02 AM

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QUOTE(iGamer @ Feb 6 2018, 09:00 AM)
WTH........... gave angpow only after eaten? U sure u went to chinese wedding? biggrin.gif
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Yes. Saw the meals prepared next door already no appetite. It was a small restaurant anyway.
SUSandylyc
post Feb 6 2018, 09:02 AM

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Luckily they didn't give you empty ang pao packets.
iGamer
post Feb 6 2018, 09:03 AM

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Should follow Shanghai style (if I'm not mistaken), they announce your angpow figure thru microphone immediately. Fuuyo.... tongue.gif
pandah
post Feb 6 2018, 09:08 AM

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Too cheapskate

As i only attend close friend or family wedding, at least 100 to 200
Chaud
post Feb 6 2018, 09:12 AM

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1. where was the wedding dinner value held first? low class place of coz get low value angpao should be expected

2. you wanna invite the people then you should already know what to expect.


lalala_lalala
post Feb 6 2018, 09:17 AM

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izzit true that some wedding they put a statement that only cash is acceptable, gift is not allowed?
Zoopdiidoo
post Feb 6 2018, 09:18 AM

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Not Acceptable
Mrsaitama
post Feb 6 2018, 09:20 AM

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ask ppl come but want money. LOL chinese logic 404.

Its named ang pow for a reason. Its their right to give any amount.
halglory
post Feb 6 2018, 09:20 AM

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If you have an chinese wedding, expect to be able to settle the bill by yourself, don't go expecting your guests to settle the bill for you. If you cannot afford it, just don't have the dinner
nelienuxe_sara
post Feb 6 2018, 09:22 AM

noob im ur father
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cukur melayu
kawin dtg makan tak payah kasi pun takpa
cikalakacikaci
post Feb 6 2018, 09:23 AM

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lol typical chinaman
wedding also want business
kek

QUOTE(nelienuxe_sara @ Feb 6 2018, 09:22 AM)
cukur melayu
kawin dtg makan tak payah kasi pun takpa
*
not really
ade je melayu2 bangsat bikin kenduri kalau salam keruk tangan
wtf




This post has been edited by cikalakacikaci: Feb 6 2018, 09:25 AM
nelienuxe_sara
post Feb 6 2018, 09:24 AM

noob im ur father
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QUOTE(Glockers @ Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM)
Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!
*
bhai kau tu bukan cina bhai
asal kau tacing bhai
SUS~Sherlock~
post Feb 6 2018, 09:25 AM

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Its the not married people belanja guest meh? laugh.gif
buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 09:26 AM

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QUOTE(nelienuxe_sara @ Feb 6 2018, 09:22 AM)
cukur melayu
kawin dtg makan tak payah kasi pun takpa
*
i went to 2 malay weddings. not hotel one, at home punya. both times the mother of the groom will do ala carte. you just order what you want and she cooks it on demand. dem.
Vincentccw
post Feb 6 2018, 09:28 AM

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I think also have to depend on the guest you are inviting, is the guest is someone you knoe or is a very distant friend?
kevyon6
post Feb 6 2018, 09:31 AM

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next time when they get married n u r invited u give the same lor
shinkawa
post Feb 6 2018, 09:34 AM

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rich people wont complain. if you scare lose money. do smaller wedding
GonnersKL
post Feb 6 2018, 09:34 AM

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i don't have control or say on the cost for the dinner, the date nor time yet I have to pay according to what you wish ?

RM10 mebe too little to your fren, but some family can fed few mouth liao for a day ....




hteekay
post Feb 6 2018, 09:36 AM

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that's why I feel the big Chinese wedding dinner mentality should die fast, it's expensive, tiring, a hassle, and 80% of the people invited are not even someone you know closely. Most of it are from the parent's friends. And those old people karaoke galore is a torture to boot.
Just invite really close friends and family, ideally not more than 60 people, a small dinner with bride and groom giving brief speech then done. Don't even need the guest to pay for anything since it's affordable.
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QUOTE(lalala_lalala @ Feb 6 2018, 09:17 AM)
izzit true that some wedding they put a statement that only cash is acceptable, gift is not allowed?
Attended more than a dozen weddings & never seen anyone do this.
FidelisGVR
post Feb 6 2018, 09:37 AM

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get married with the expectation of getting a profit via the angpow kah? lel
SUSGlockers
post Feb 6 2018, 09:47 AM

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QUOTE(nelienuxe_sara @ Feb 6 2018, 09:24 AM)
bhai kau tu bukan cina bhai
asal kau tacing bhai
*
Nak ajar mereka adab bai. Kita 1 Malaysia. Ramai jugak kawan aku cina jemput wedding. Tapi blum ada yang macam TS.
andrewhtf
post Feb 6 2018, 09:54 AM

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kalau mau berkira sangat, dont do wedding dinner.
kalau mau buat jugak, pay out of own pocket is expected.

kalau ada hati mau buat profit from the dinner, then i say padan muka kena rm10 angpau. in fact if you kena newspaper in angpau lagi bagus.
HoneyPink
post Feb 6 2018, 09:57 AM

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QUOTE(Glockers @ Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM)
Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!
*
+1 its true man. U wanna held wedding dinner u dont take it as business. Wedding dinner is suppose u wanna share the moments with ur close friend relatives family. I dont understand y chinese like this. doh.gif doh.gif doh.gif doh.gif doh.gif
HoneyPink
post Feb 6 2018, 09:57 AM

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QUOTE(andrewhtf @ Feb 6 2018, 09:54 AM)
kalau mau berkira sangat, dont do wedding dinner.
kalau mau buat jugak, pay out of own pocket is expected.

kalau ada hati mau buat profit from the dinner, then i say padan muka kena rm10 angpau. in fact if you kena newspaper in angpau lagi bagus.
*
bagi packet angpao ngan gula sebijik kt dlm da cukup tuh.
SUSshephard86
post Feb 6 2018, 09:58 AM

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RM10 also money what. U should be grateful they didn't put hell note inside the ang pao.
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post Feb 6 2018, 09:59 AM

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QUOTE(shephard86 @ Feb 6 2018, 09:58 AM)
RM10 also money what. U should be grateful they didn't put hell note inside the ang pao.
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choi
cckkpr
post Feb 6 2018, 10:01 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
Not trying to be racist, from my experience those are non Chinese frens. I accepted because probably its the norm for them.

ahpoo
post Feb 6 2018, 10:01 AM

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waa 2018..still chinese so calculative...kiasuness too strong...
SUSEdBaaBaa
post Feb 6 2018, 10:01 AM

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Angpow is "lai see".

No need complain guests give u lai see.

If want fixed or minimum cash then set door charge la. Don't pretend to invite guests for dinner to celebrate yr wedding
andrewhtf
post Feb 6 2018, 10:05 AM

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QUOTE(HoneyPink @ Feb 6 2018, 09:57 AM)
bagi packet angpao ngan gula sebijik kt dlm da cukup tuh.
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itu untuk event lain bhai

user posted image
OldSchoolJoke
post Feb 6 2018, 10:06 AM

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QUOTE(EdBaaBaa @ Feb 6 2018, 10:01 AM)
Angpow is "lai see".

No need complain guests give u lai see.

If want fixed or minimum cash then set door charge la. Don't pretend to invite guests for dinner to celebrate yr wedding
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invitation card must write clearly. Ang pow money should not be less than RM100
alanyuppie
post Feb 6 2018, 10:07 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 08:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
dont expect reasonable sum FROM EVERY SINGLE TIME/PERSON, ALL THE TIME. When he gets generous sum (lets say rm500 from boss )... did he felt syukur coz its able to offset the less then favorable ones?


btw, some of my relatives arent' well to do... they make a point to help out during wedding events and we insist that they shouldnt worry about angpau during wedding dinner coz its waived.

This post has been edited by alanyuppie: Feb 6 2018, 10:08 AM
JungWoo
post Feb 6 2018, 10:08 AM

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another sei sohai chinamen mindset. people invite you to their wedding supposed to feel happy for them, now first thing come into thought is financial burden
fuzagi
post Feb 6 2018, 10:09 AM

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belanja makan ma. why expect the guests u invited to belanja your wedding dinner yo? it's your marriage, u wanna host dinner, u belanja makan. not the other way round. those who whine on the amount of cash in 'lai see' is cheapskate+vague. think twice if u have friends of that kind. are they genuinely happy to have u to witness their wedding grandeur, or do they just want u eat your soft rice?
incubus_skj
post Feb 6 2018, 10:10 AM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:05 AM)
when you get invited to someone's wedding, and is pretty close to the bride and/or bridesmaid, you are torn between your commitment as a friend, your financial situation, your own personal problems. It is not you to judge someone is cheapskate based on the angpao they give for your wedding.
*
Eleh cakap banyak, cheapskate lettew

Kalau finance buruk, hantar angpow cukup la jangan pergi makan
stimix
post Feb 6 2018, 10:11 AM

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QUOTE(nightshade_nova @ Feb 6 2018, 08:03 AM)
RM10 so cheapskate...
Those are ang pows you give to kids during raya.
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Hehe..my angpow just RM2 for kids
buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 10:12 AM

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QUOTE(stimix @ Feb 6 2018, 10:11 AM)
Hehe..my angpow just RM2 for kids
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ok la at least you dont only put fai chun inside.
incubus_skj
post Feb 6 2018, 10:13 AM

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Remember the ppl who gave, then bagi balik rm10 for their wedding la

It's good practice to note down the names of the angpow givers on the angpows, you know which one paid how much, so that next time you can return the favor

This post has been edited by incubus_skj: Feb 6 2018, 10:13 AM
amxpayne67
post Feb 6 2018, 10:13 AM

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QUOTE(incubus_skj @ Feb 6 2018, 10:10 AM)
Eleh cakap banyak, cheapskate lettew

Kalau finance buruk, hantar angpow cukup la jangan pergi makan
*
so, money is more important than the wedding?
stimix
post Feb 6 2018, 10:14 AM

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BTW, to avoid getting smaller angpows from poorfags, he shouldn't imvited them. Only choose those loaded friends & relatives liao.

My yardsticks: if normal restaurant/malay wedding- RM30/pax.
Hotel wedding- rm50/pax
JungWoo
post Feb 6 2018, 10:14 AM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 10:13 AM)
so, money is more important than the wedding?
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depend it suksesful marriage or not laugh.gif
nelienuxe_sara
post Feb 6 2018, 10:22 AM

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QUOTE(incubus_skj @ Feb 6 2018, 10:13 AM)
Remember the ppl who gave, then bagi balik rm10 for their wedding la

It's good practice to note down the names of the angpow givers on the angpows, you know which one paid how much, so that next time you can return the favor
*
the kiasu'ness is strong in you~
acougan
post Feb 6 2018, 10:24 AM

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Put in some durex voucher also better than rm10!
pgsiemkia
post Feb 6 2018, 10:25 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
last time I receive from non-cainis, so understand that they gaji not high but come enjoy the occasion. Not that I invited many.

Duperaider
post Feb 6 2018, 10:25 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
Normally, those who give rm 10 are those whose parents just gave a few thousand
Duperaider
post Feb 6 2018, 10:26 AM

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QUOTE(pgsiemkia @ Feb 6 2018, 10:25 AM)
last time I receive from non-cainis, so understand that they gaji not high but come enjoy the occasion. Not that I invited many.
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I got that too
omnimech
post Feb 6 2018, 10:26 AM

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Honestly if the guests are so fuckin cheap, they should do the right thing and decline to attend.

I mean, it takes 2 to tango.

Yes, getting married, people are normally ready to absorb the costs and besides the dinner, there is alcohol, photographers and lord knows what else.

But also, when you are invited, you fuckin better be able to pay market rate, or just decline to attend and fuck off to the side. I mean RM50 to RM100 is fine enough, but RM 10 ? Dafuq ?


This post has been edited by omnimech: Feb 6 2018, 10:27 AM
Dead_Arrow
post Feb 6 2018, 10:30 AM

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QUOTE(Duperaider @ Feb 6 2018, 10:26 AM)
I got that too
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me too. and the halal meal set even expensive then the restaurant price. I told them, just put whatever you think u affort it.
blur_goofy
post Feb 6 2018, 10:30 AM

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let me get this clear, TS 'fren' invited someone to his wedding but expect guest to pay for his own meal?


pgsiemkia
post Feb 6 2018, 10:32 AM

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QUOTE(omnimech @ Feb 6 2018, 10:26 AM)
Honestly if the guests are so fuckin cheap, they should do the right thing and decline to attend.

I mean, it takes 2 to tango.

Yes, getting married, people are normally ready to absorb the costs and besides the dinner, there is alcohol, photographers and lord knows what else.

But also, when you are invited, you fuckin better be able to pay market rate, or just decline to attend and fuck off to the side. I mean RM50 to RM100 is fine enough, but RM 10 ? Dafuq ?
*
I feel if you can't afford a big wedding, keep it small..dun expect guests to come pay for your costs. I kept mine at 30 tables, close relatives and friends and still managed to pay off dinner costs and the liquor with leftover for 2nd dinner. Photographer was part of the package from the wedding house.

Nowadays even couples take loans to save face, useless

FauxHawk
post Feb 6 2018, 10:32 AM

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Put RM10, might as well put newspaper at that point.
incubus_skj
post Feb 6 2018, 10:40 AM

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QUOTE(pgsiemkia @ Feb 6 2018, 10:32 AM)
I feel if you can't afford a big wedding, keep it small..dun expect guests to come pay for your costs. I kept mine at 30 tables, close relatives and friends and still managed to pay off dinner costs and the liquor with leftover for 2nd dinner. Photographer was part of the package from the wedding house.

Nowadays even couples take loans to save face, useless
*
then for those who can afford the big wedding, you expect to go there as a guest, makan all their good food, minum all the alcohol and just give RM10 angpow?

lul

lucky i no have friends like this
incubus_skj
post Feb 6 2018, 10:41 AM

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QUOTE(nelienuxe_sara @ Feb 6 2018, 10:22 AM)
the kiasu'ness is strong in you~
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yeah ikr
saikia2046
post Feb 6 2018, 10:42 AM

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NMH this is your wedding and you invite people come to celebrate. People has no responsibility for sponsoring the wedding dinner regardless. People come already give face, some more wanna complain about ang pao small. How about those retired old folks who are poor and no income?

Wanna do wedding dinner should expect to pay all but not for making money.
OldSchoolJoke
post Feb 6 2018, 10:44 AM

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QUOTE(incubus_skj @ Feb 6 2018, 10:40 AM)
then for those who can afford the big wedding, you expect to go there as a guest, makan all their good food, minum all the alcohol and just give RM10 angpow?

lul

lucky i no have friends like this
*
if my friends invite me to their wedding, they better prepare for losing money. you invite me without knowing my financial background. what friend are you? doh.gif

and you LGE, konfem all rich rich friends brows.gif
spacelion
post Feb 6 2018, 10:44 AM

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My cousin had small wedding. 20 tables in bankers club. didnt have angpow collection , but still got a lot of ppl come give angpow.
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 10:44 AM

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i think chinese wedding been changing over the time

for chinese anything to congratulate or celebrating ang pao will be given but not the amount just take as wishing to another person

but over the years, then ppl is care more about the amount due to chinese want "face" so they usually order expensive food with the restaurant and come up from couple hundread to thousand a table

some not so rich and wanted "faces" then will hope guest will give some amount to help out by ordering expensive food per table , of course not many can earn from wedding dinner by it self...

but chinese now tend to forgot the true meaning of wedding, of course i know some are very rich and dont accept ang pao but the case is less
bcth928
post Feb 6 2018, 10:45 AM

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rm10 bukan money meh???
air_ed20
post Feb 6 2018, 10:47 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
i recd once from a couple attending mine giving 20 for both cry.gif

beahappyman
post Feb 6 2018, 10:49 AM

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ekonomi bad. people have rough life now.

if you happen to bao rm10, just dun get your name written down.

after all who the hell know how much you bao?

win.
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 10:49 AM

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i got invited multiple times for friends wedding...of course i will give decent amount from RM80 to RM 100 for attending alone, coz we all know the drill ..i not rich or from rich family i will give base on my current financials
SUSifourtos
post Feb 6 2018, 10:49 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
No offence
U must be from penang

98% sure
pgsiemkia
post Feb 6 2018, 10:50 AM

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QUOTE(incubus_skj @ Feb 6 2018, 10:40 AM)
then for those who can afford the big wedding, you expect to go there as a guest, makan all their good food, minum all the alcohol and just give RM10 angpow?

lul

lucky i no have friends like this
*
These people will have clerks and kerani, office boys that they want to invite, so how, say minimal rm50 angpow must give at Chee Mui table, izit?

Btw, I don't judge friends by the contents of their wallets, wait till you have no money one day and see how many of you so-called rich friends will take your call.


0168257061
post Feb 6 2018, 10:51 AM

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People come already consider giving face.
if your face no problem then congrats.

if you face problem, please syukur.

People come no need toll, no need time, no need petrol?
Still need to pay for the food when you "invited" ?
b3arbear
post Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM

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I will not host those fancy wedding dinner at restaurant. I might just rent a hall or do a buffet catering at my own stay. Wedding is just a thing between me and my future spouse. not to get their money to cover wedding dinner or gain profit if they generous enough.


cckkpr
post Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM

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Those who said RM10 nothing wrong.....when you get married and 30% of the guests give RM10, can you accept?

That will be your answer
thesoothsayer
post Feb 6 2018, 10:54 AM

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Every time I see threads like this, I think of that Hong Kong youtube clip where the groom calls people up to open their ang paus.
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 10:55 AM

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QUOTE(hardreality @ Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM)
You should give according to what that friend is worth to you. I hate getting wedding invitations from people i barely know to attend a banquet of food i don't like and expects me to pay for their choice of food and possibly even sponsor their honeymoon.
*
well as i say base on my current financial.... i gave RM80 that time i have no jobs and my bank left about RM2000 you expect me pay how much??
incubus_skj
post Feb 6 2018, 10:56 AM

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QUOTE(OldSchoolJoke @ Feb 6 2018, 10:44 AM)
if my friends invite me to their wedding, they better prepare for losing money. you invite me without knowing my financial background. what friend are you?  doh.gif

and you LGE, konfem all rich rich friends  brows.gif
*
ini pun betul juga... hmm.gif hmm.gif


QUOTE(pgsiemkia @ Feb 6 2018, 10:50 AM)
These people will have clerks and kerani, office boys that they want to invite, so how, say minimal rm50 angpow must give at Chee Mui table, izit?

Btw, I don't judge friends by the contents of their wallets, wait till you have no money one day and see how many of you so-called rich friends will take your call.
*
if my workers come with RM10 i ok la. my kuli je, don't expect much.

if friend RM10? this one too much ad.
Ganymede
post Feb 6 2018, 11:02 AM

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chinese mindset.
wanna attend wedding dinner.
wanna pau all the alchohol
wan abalone, shark fin, prawn, geoduck, all the good expensive food.

but.. wanna give rm10 only tongue.gif Lel

origami
post Feb 6 2018, 11:03 AM

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Write in invitation card minimum acceptable angpow amount per pax
Adult, children, slim, fat, alcohol drinker different rates

Problem solved rclxs0.gif
Newsray
post Feb 6 2018, 11:04 AM

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Now many sohai treat wedding as profitable business.

Their main intention is to get angpow to cover the wedding. In another word, please come and pay for my wedding.


SUSbutterjiken
post Feb 6 2018, 11:04 AM

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baik tak payah ajak wtf
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 11:06 AM

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QUOTE(hardreality @ Feb 6 2018, 11:02 AM)
I don't mind paying more if it's a good friend. Hi/Bye friends i won't pay rm80 even if I'm  earning 20k.
*
then you are rich forgot to tell you , i am not living with parent , lost job and also everything is supporting by that amount, rental, bills and food

maybe you can try to experience it, how you survive couple month with no income and see how much you pay then also have bank loan debt

This post has been edited by Amy09: Feb 6 2018, 11:08 AM
TrollNoob
post Feb 6 2018, 11:08 AM

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Relax...

My reception at Marriot a few years back. With all those exclusive people coming (my dad used to be somebody in banking line), we even accepted RM1 angpao. No prob.

Its the thought that counts.

inb4 my malay wedding dinner at house for plebs costs RM25 per head. It was quite expensive back then.

Don't give money also no prob. As long as people come because we catered for 4000 pax. Else the food would go to waste.


Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 11:09 AM

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QUOTE(hardreality @ Feb 6 2018, 11:08 AM)
Why would you think I've not been through worse?

hmm.gif
*
you say you can pay more then how much you pay?
TrollNoob
post Feb 6 2018, 11:09 AM

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QUOTE(Amy09 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:06 AM)
then you are rich forgot to tell you , i am not living with parent , lost job and also everything is supporting by that amount, rental, bills and food

maybe you can try to experience it, how you survive couple month with no income and see how much you pay then also have bank loan debt
*
you're still hunting? its been 6 months right?

good luck...
zorbyss.
post Feb 6 2018, 11:10 AM

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i've been to a few cainis wedding that don't take angpau.
still wedding cost are expected to be spent. only old uncles like my dad generation take wedding dinner as a profit.
i told my friend i dont wanna check angpau when i'm getting married. well, some said, they keep a list of names and their angpaus. how much they gib then when it's their wedding you gib back how much.
cainis. manyak kira la.
before you trigger. ayam cainis. hainanese x teochew if you're curious.
teikboon
post Feb 6 2018, 11:11 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
you mean 15 rm10 in one angpao?
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 11:12 AM

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QUOTE(TrollNoob @ Feb 6 2018, 11:09 AM)
you're still hunting? its been 6 months right?

good luck...
*
nah not anymore just ppl like to talk big which annoys me ..already have financial crisis then say can fork out more, then i want to see how much crap he can talk about

This post has been edited by Amy09: Feb 6 2018, 11:12 AM
Ganymede
post Feb 6 2018, 11:14 AM

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QUOTE(zorbyss. @ Feb 6 2018, 11:10 AM)
i've been to a few cainis wedding that don't take angpau.
still wedding cost are expected to be spent. only old uncles like my dad generation take wedding dinner as a profit.
i told my friend i dont wanna check angpau when i'm getting married. well, some said, they keep a list of names and their angpaus. how much they gib then when it's their wedding you gib back how much.
cainis. manyak kira la.
before you trigger. ayam cainis. hainanese x teochew if you're curious.
*
i actually gained from my wedding dinner ( not that i berkira).
cos, the place was decently nice, invited close friends and family, all happy happy. so all give minimum rm50 to rm100.
bonus that it covered but was also blessed to have all the wonderful ppl around.

if really wanna berkira haiyo, i think also go crazy look back all the names/angpow many many years later haha
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 11:14 AM

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QUOTE(hardreality @ Feb 6 2018, 11:13 AM)
When my cousin got married i paid rm200 i was earning less than rm2k.
*
ya you are earning less dude i am earning NONE JOBLESS for couple months, know the damn different

try live 6 month with no income with RM 2k not earning 2k

need to pay rental , bills, expenses for 6 month, you do that please

how much you can fork out?? try to know on peoples shoes before you can talk big

This post has been edited by Amy09: Feb 6 2018, 11:19 AM
acbc
post Feb 6 2018, 11:15 AM

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Close family members or old friends can splurge a bit. Mortal enemies or competitors? Don’t.
TrollNoob
post Feb 6 2018, 11:19 AM

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QUOTE(Amy09 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:12 AM)
nah not anymore just ppl like to talk big which annoys me ..already have financial crisis then say can fork out more, then i want to see how much crap he can talk about
*
never been there... congratulations. you managed to pull yourself out of the dire situation.

on the angpao note, just give what you can afford. If the host still demand, just don't go lar... save both of your face.
amanechoir
post Feb 6 2018, 11:20 AM

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Based on my observation, those that seemed to care about how much reception angpao they get usually are from middle to upper class family.

Really rich family could care less. Most chinese dinner that I went, explicitly mentioned no angpao/gift in their invites or just give it to charity etc. But that didn't stop some people from giving. wink.gif
Amy09
post Feb 6 2018, 11:22 AM

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QUOTE(TrollNoob @ Feb 6 2018, 11:19 AM)
never been there... congratulations. you managed to pull yourself out of the dire situation.

on the angpao note, just give what you can afford. If the host still demand, just don't go lar... save both of your face.
*
they know my situation so they are fine with it
OldSchoolJoke
post Feb 6 2018, 11:22 AM

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QUOTE(amanechoir @ Feb 6 2018, 11:20 AM)
Based on my observation, those that seemed to care about how much reception angpao they get usually are from middle to upper class family.

Really rich family could care less. Most chinese dinner that I went, explicitly mentioned no angpao/gift in their invites or just give it to charity etc. But that didn't stop some people from giving.  wink.gif
*
really rich family with really rich relative konfem no loss..
relatives konfem give big big angpow, cannot lose face..
Meis
post Feb 6 2018, 11:25 AM

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QUOTE(gumshoe101 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:11 AM)
The fact that they come is good enough. I would rather not attend any wedding.waste my time.
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empire23
post Feb 6 2018, 11:27 AM

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Depends on my mood. If I don't really know the feller but he still invite, here's 10 ringgit GLHF. If fren oso depends on how generous I feel lol but usually more.
tohff7
post Feb 6 2018, 11:28 AM

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a lot of ppl here talk cock sing song only la.

if really want to pay RM10 as angpow nia, why bother to accept the invitation in the first place? if not so close, why want to attend?
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:29 AM

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People who expect their 'invited' guest to pay for their own dinner is 'sampah' especially those who has 'minimum' ang pao requirement.

That is the truth.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:31 AM

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QUOTE(tohff7 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:28 AM)
a lot of ppl here talk cock sing song only la.

if really want to pay RM10 as angpow nia, why bother to accept the invitation in the first place? if not so close, why want to attend?
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betul!

Lada Putih
post Feb 6 2018, 11:32 AM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
even kampung area giving rm50 per angpao is already being frown upon

the functionality of angpao is to lighten the burden for the newlyweds for the dinner.
To congratulate the family, show respect towards the family and to show approval towards the family, and also helping them to build a new "house"

Giving RM 10 shows the disrespect towards the family as the dinner which may or may not contain highly assorted items such as shark fin and abalone,
only paying RM 10 for it as if the relationship between the guest towards the family are only worth that much.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:34 AM

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QUOTE(ocphangaz @ Feb 6 2018, 08:06 AM)
people give what they can afford... what is the problem? blame the groom not choosing their guest properly.
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More like blame the groom for being cheapskate and poor
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QUOTE(Lada Putih @ Feb 6 2018, 11:32 AM)
even kampung area giving rm50 per angpao is already being frown upon

the functionality of angpao is to lighten the burden for the newlyweds for the dinner.
To congratulate the family, show respect towards the family and to show approval towards the family, and also helping them to build a new "house"

Giving RM 10 shows the disrespect towards the family as the dinner which may or may not contain highly assorted items such as shark fin and abalone,
only paying RM 10 for it as if the relationship between the guest towards the family are only worth that much.
*
if you get married and need people to pay for something, theres something wrong there.

its like i say, EH BRO I BELANJA U MAKAN, BUT U PAYME RM50 upfront ya!
runemastertan
post Feb 6 2018, 11:35 AM

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QUOTE(Lada Putih @ Feb 6 2018, 11:32 AM)
even kampung area giving rm50 per angpao is already being frown upon

the functionality of angpao is to lighten the burden for the newlyweds for the dinner.
To congratulate the family, show respect towards the family and to show approval towards the family, and also helping them to build a new "house"

Giving RM 10 shows the disrespect towards the family as the dinner which may or may not contain highly assorted items such as shark fin and abalone,
only paying RM 10 for it as if the relationship between the guest towards the family are only worth that much.
*
Most chinese use wedding as a profit event. Giving anything less than what they expect and shit comes out from their mouth
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:40 AM

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QUOTE(+3kk! @ Feb 6 2018, 11:35 AM)
if you get married and need people to pay for something, theres something wrong there.

its like i say, EH BRO I BELANJA U MAKAN, BUT U PAYME RM50 upfront ya!
*
put it this way. if groom say ' eh come my wedding dinner, no need angpow' .

and when u arrive serve u nasi lemak and mee rebus only, will u complain cheapskate groom? or will you happily go also and share happiness since the makan is secondary?

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post Feb 6 2018, 11:43 AM

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why are Chinese wedding so calculative? they wanna make a grand wedding but expect the guests to pay for it?

Look at Malay & Indians wedding. they NEVER expect ANYTHING from the guest, in fact the only thing they wish if for them to ATTEND the wedding to celebrate the joy of their new marriage.

U can see the mindset now right?
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:43 AM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 11:40 AM)
put it this way. if groom say ' eh come my wedding dinner, no need angpow' .

and when u arrive serve u nasi lemak and mee rebus only, will u complain cheapskate groom? or will you happily go also and share happiness since the makan is secondary?
*
Nah, I'd eat that stuff happily and be even happier as there's no expectation for me to "donate" any money.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:43 AM

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post Feb 6 2018, 11:44 AM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 11:40 AM)
put it this way. if groom say ' eh come my wedding dinner, no need angpow' .

and when u arrive serve u nasi lemak and mee rebus only, will u complain cheapskate groom? or will you happily go also and share happiness since the makan is secondary?
*
go and be happy, he is a friend, im happy for him

you do this before the wedding anyway, the pre wedding celebration, go get some booze, everyone pays their share and makan mamak

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post Feb 6 2018, 11:46 AM

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QUOTE(runemastertan @ Feb 6 2018, 11:35 AM)
Most chinese use wedding as a profit event. Giving anything less than what they expect and shit comes out from their mouth
*
I pity people that think that way, using wedding to profit.

But regardless of the host intention, as an attendee who ACCEPTED the invitation and attend, giving RM10 angpow just make yourself look cheapskate. The proper way is to have decline the invitation in the first place
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:47 AM

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QUOTE(+3kk! @ Feb 6 2018, 11:44 AM)
go and be happy, he is a friend, im happy for him

you do this before the wedding anyway, the pre wedding celebration, go get some booze, everyone pays their share and makan mamak
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QUOTE(empire23 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:43 AM)
Nah, I'd eat that stuff happily and be even happier as there's no expectation for me to "donate" any money.
*
good. if all have this mindset things are so much easier.

unfortunately.. chinese rarely have this mindset.

make small the old uncle/aunties will say ' wah.. so small wedding nia'

make simple ' wah .. so simple nia'

most time the wedding dinner is done just to satisfy these kepo relatives
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:50 AM

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QUOTE(Hanzo @ Feb 6 2018, 11:43 AM)
why are Chinese wedding so calculative? they wanna make a grand wedding but expect the guests to pay for it?

Look at Malay & Indians wedding. they NEVER expect ANYTHING from the guest, in fact the only thing they wish if for them to ATTEND the wedding to celebrate the joy of their new marriage.

U can see the mindset now right?
*
It's not just Chinese. Even Malays nowadays also do grand weddings.

Just that Chinese been doing it long enough and there's already pre-established "market rates" that one ideally should give
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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 11:47 AM)
good. if all have this mindset things are so much easier.

unfortunately.. chinese rarely have this mindset.

make small the old uncle/aunties will say ' wah.. so small wedding nia'

make simple ' wah .. so simple nia'

most time the wedding dinner is done just to satisfy these kepo relatives
*
well if these people are not good people, dont invite - settle

the whole blame the relatives/parents gig is old and silly, is as if people suddenly lost their balls to tell people off
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:51 AM

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if must give angpao >rm100 to attend wedding, what is the difference with going to restaurant?

if paksa then no need do wedding la.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:53 AM

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QUOTE(tohff7 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:46 AM)
I pity people that think that way, using wedding to profit.

But regardless of the host intention, as an attendee who ACCEPTED the invitation and attend, giving RM10 angpow just make yourself look cheapskate. The proper way is to have decline the invitation in the first place
*
But but I AM cheapstake....... sad.gif

QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 11:47 AM)
good. if all have this mindset things are so much easier.

unfortunately.. chinese rarely have this mindset.

make small the old uncle/aunties will say ' wah.. so small wedding nia'

make simple ' wah .. so simple nia'

most time the wedding dinner is done just to satisfy these kepo relatives
*
I'm happy for my friends getting hitched. I don't believe in giving cash out. I'll help you with wedding chores, carry things and all that other stuff but if people expect cash from me they're dead wrong.

I've been to weddings where all the food was home cooked with 12 people in a house just enjoying a meal the bride cooked. Those are the most memorable.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:55 AM

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Chinese wedding is like that . They have market rates

What I can say is the 1 who give RM10 is cheapskate
The 1 who complain about the RM10 is also cheapskate
Hanzo
post Feb 6 2018, 11:55 AM

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QUOTE(tohff7 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:50 AM)
It's not just Chinese. Even Malays nowadays also do grand weddings.

Just that Chinese been doing it long enough and there's already pre-established "market rates" that one ideally should give
*
fyi, the Malays who made grand weddings REALLY CAN AFFORD IT not begging to guests with minimum amount set angpow to cover (and making profit if can).

how i know? my wedding is grand (in a 5 star hotel) and i do not expect anything from the guests. i've already set the budget to cover number of guests for the wedding and all i want is my close family and friends to come CELEBRATE MY GOD DAMN WEDDING with the love of my life.

if you are expecting to gain profit from your big day marrying your sweetheart, then you should ask yourself..why marry in the 1st place?

This post has been edited by Hanzo: Feb 6 2018, 11:56 AM
esdome
post Feb 6 2018, 11:57 AM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 11:47 AM)
good. if all have this mindset things are so much easier.

unfortunately.. chinese rarely have this mindset.

make small the old uncle/aunties will say ' wah.. so small wedding nia'

make simple ' wah .. so simple nia'

most time the wedding dinner is done just to satisfy these kepo relatives
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Don't generalize all Chinese.

I would say it is rare for Chinese to have the mindset of expecting an angpao from guests.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:58 AM

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QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
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No one ask you INVITE them. when you invite your friend to your house, do you ask for electricity? aircon maintenance fees? floor cleaning fees?

unless they come without invitation.
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post Feb 6 2018, 11:59 AM

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QUOTE(MR_alien @ Feb 6 2018, 08:27 AM)
Rm10?
I'm still receiving RM2 these few years
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stop receiving while this year you should be giving already
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:02 PM

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QUOTE(empire23 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:53 AM)
But but I AM cheapstake....... sad.gif
I'm happy for my friends getting hitched. I don't believe in giving cash out. I'll help you with wedding chores, carry things and all that other stuff but if people expect cash from me they're dead wrong.

I've been to weddings where all the food was home cooked with 12 people in a house just enjoying a meal the bride cooked. Those are the most memorable.
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ah this is ok. u edi paid back by the assistance and help which is worth its weight in gold.

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post Feb 6 2018, 12:04 PM

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QUOTE(esdome @ Feb 6 2018, 11:57 AM)
Don't generalize all Chinese.

I would say it is rare for Chinese to have the mindset of expecting an angpao from guests.
*
1. i didn't say all chinese.
2. chinese are the ones known to expect angpow... as it is their custom.

unless the chinese you mean is a different chinese from my understanding
cjlio1
post Feb 6 2018, 12:05 PM

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QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
*
nothing wrong, ppl now adays expect big ang pau evertime they get married, have kids, birthdays etc ...

dont like receiving small tokens then please dont invite, thats all


cjlio1
post Feb 6 2018, 12:06 PM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 12:04 PM)
1. i didn't say all chinese.
2. chinese are the ones known to expect angpow... as it is their custom.

unless the chinese you mean is a different chinese from my understanding
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Christian Chinese weddings generally dont take ang pau but gifts i.e. blender, TV, etc ..
electronictomato
post Feb 6 2018, 12:08 PM

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U shud open counter at the entrance. Register their name and angpow right b4 enter hall. If below rm50, put them on plastic chair.

This post has been edited by electronictomato: Feb 6 2018, 12:09 PM
Ganymede
post Feb 6 2018, 12:09 PM

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QUOTE(cjlio1 @ Feb 6 2018, 12:06 PM)
Christian Chinese weddings generally dont take ang pau but gifts i.e. blender, TV, etc ..
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lol itu lagi worse.
blender edi more than rm100....
TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 12:18 PM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 12:04 PM)
1. i didn't say all chinese.
2. chinese are the ones known to expect angpow... as it is their custom.

unless the chinese you mean is a different chinese from my understanding
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Yup, most people hope can cover 80-100% of the wedding reception cost
esdome
post Feb 6 2018, 12:23 PM

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QUOTE(Ganymede @ Feb 6 2018, 12:04 PM)
1. i didn't say all chinese.
2. chinese are the ones known to expect angpow... as it is their custom.

unless the chinese you mean is a different chinese from my understanding
*
1. I didn't say you are mocking Chinese. Just generalizing.
2. Expecting an angpao from guests is not their custom.

The Chinese you mean probably different from mine.
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:31 PM

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Chinese wedding macam do business. That's the part I hate about them, and the games.
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:37 PM

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your wedding invite ppl to celebrate with you...ppl give angpao little you complain lol...anyway its their courtesy if offer you big angpao...its not compulsory though
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:39 PM

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QUOTE(shinchan^^ @ Feb 6 2018, 11:59 AM)
stop receiving while this year you should be giving already
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i'm not married
and that RM2 is not specifically given to me
she gives EVERYONE RM2 laugh.gif
United Rulez
post Feb 6 2018, 12:46 PM

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Normal lah chinese mindset, petty, calculative, save face, kisau etc.
Says alot about us when you have "market rates" for wedding ang pow, CNY ang pow, and bak gam for funeral.

This post has been edited by United Rulez: Feb 6 2018, 12:48 PM
yhcyber
post Feb 6 2018, 12:47 PM

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The argument comes when ppl treat wedding as a business

So, your wedding is for sharing the happiness or doing business? Choose wisely. The ang pao is for best wish to the couple, not for earning and comparing among each others
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:48 PM

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RM10 more than RM0
RicoT
post Feb 6 2018, 12:48 PM

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They gip gold jewelry already, you still want big ang pau?
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:58 PM

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QUOTE(omnimech @ Feb 6 2018, 10:26 AM)
Honestly if the guests are so fuckin cheap, they should do the right thing and decline to attend.

I mean, it takes 2 to tango.

Yes, getting married, people are normally ready to absorb the costs and besides the dinner, there is alcohol, photographers and lord knows what else.

But also, when you are invited, you fuckin better be able to pay market rate, or just decline to attend and fuck off to the side. I mean RM50 to RM100 is fine enough, but RM 10 ? Dafuq ?
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Can decline to attend your farking dinner and don't need to pay ?
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post Feb 6 2018, 12:59 PM

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QUOTE(b3arbear @ Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM)
I will not host those fancy wedding dinner at restaurant. I might just rent a hall or do a buffet catering at my own stay. Wedding is just a thing between me and my future spouse. not to get their money to cover wedding dinner or gain profit if they generous enough.
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provided wife and her parents agree biggrin.gif biggrin.gif biggrin.gif
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post Feb 6 2018, 01:00 PM

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The guests are already courteous enough by attending. The amount in the angpao should be up to them but it is the typical chinese mindset; treating everything as a profit & loss entity.

But then, if I were to change my mind in the future and have a waifu, I would only invite close relatives and close friends. It is not about the money, it is about the memories you can create.


Ayam cainis of hokien descent btw.
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post Feb 6 2018, 01:03 PM

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my friend = ts.
ts, rm10 is unacceptable, chinese wedding restaurant 1 table i think atleast need rm1k +
atleast giv rm100 la diu. ts share their name here so we can help u share on social media.
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post Feb 6 2018, 01:08 PM

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The mindset to earn for wedding dinner is wrong.

U hold a wedding dinner and invite guest. It's up to the guest to decide how much he will pay. If he can afford it, and if he think to help out, he will pay RM100 lo. But what if is old unker n aunty, sons and dotters working at other place, and no income already? U can't judge them if they pay RM30 or 40.

Guests give angpao out of being understanding and showing gratitude. U hold wedding dinner and expecting high turnover? Please la, whats the point of having wedding dinner in the first place?

if so kira, might as well dont do wedding dinner. Go holiday wedding sudah.
cloudwan0
post Feb 6 2018, 01:19 PM

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economy is good, so no need to give big angpao
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post Feb 6 2018, 01:26 PM

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biarlah.. u marry just to get angpao or happiness with your wife?? just pick one for god sake
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post Feb 6 2018, 01:41 PM

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the feeling when I saw a hi/bye cousin married, my dad pay RM600 for 2 people.....and he serve tapau food for my dad becos he vegan. (health issue have to vegan)

KNN thats was once my moneh.

This post has been edited by Boldnut: Feb 6 2018, 01:42 PM
Twins10
post Feb 6 2018, 01:51 PM

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What if they say rm5k a table? Guest must give rm500 per seat? Family of 3 pay rm1500? I got a rich friend who did this. I just pay rm150 only. One of our classmates pay rm50. Others I don't know.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:20 PM

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Senang kata, you cant afford to give a decent sized ang pow then dont go. Give 10 bucks just gonna make you look bad.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:24 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 12:18 PM)
Yup, most people hope can cover 80-100% of the wedding reception cost
*
Lol

My previous marriage wedding costed 80-100k,never expect to get back money also.

But to receive rm10 angpow is just too much la. But then again who go and invite this kinda friend also bodo. But then again if you didn't know earlier, now you know who are the cheapskate friends that you can avoid liao

This post has been edited by incubus_skj: Feb 6 2018, 02:25 PM
ma3da
post Feb 6 2018, 02:24 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 08:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
You sure or not...or you just creating story here..
usually they will write their name on the ang pau.

lie also pandai pandai la sikit
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:25 PM

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QUOTE(steveabutt @ Feb 6 2018, 01:07 PM)
Normally the wedding couple will record the amount of angpow given in the guest list so that can refer back how much angpow to give in return if the said person invite u to wedding. I think it is common courtesy la u attend ppl's wedding u help to chip in some money to cover ur own portion as a blessing to the married couple.

Handphone bill rm100-200 also u no problem pay every month, some ppl drink starbuck coffee every other day. But friend who is close enough to invite u to wedding u dont even want to chip in RM50 as a blessing? Tells a lot about ur personality leh. In the end the merrid couple will just take the wedding bill as a tuition fee to learn more about u.
*
You call this courtesy ? If you invite your friend that don't no he is really poor cannot afford to pay angpau, how? Don't come also have to pay. It just like forcing him to pay for your dinner.

Help what? Can't afford, don't put on the big hat.

Want face but no money. shakehead.gif
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:26 PM

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Ang Pau is up to the guest one ma, if wanna "belanja" and emo cos get rm20 angpau then don't do better
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:27 PM

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QUOTE(gumshoe101 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:11 AM)
The fact that they come is good enough. I would rather not attend any wedding.waste my time.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:27 PM

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Acceptable.

If the married couple years expect more, they should have stated earlier.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:28 PM

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This so called market rate is bullshit. Expecting guests to chip in. WTH? No money, then have a small do la. I paid market rates before, skarly after wedding ajak yumcha also say busy with wifu. CB punya orang.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:33 PM

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Don't shame yourselves with RM10 wedding ang pow. You know your name and ang pow amount is recorded right don't you? Just tell them cannot attend problem solved.
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:34 PM

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QUOTE(acbc @ Feb 6 2018, 08:04 AM)
Previously I gave RM 20 because the meals were cold and bad. If hotels like Hilton, easily RM 200 per pax. Min also RM 50.
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bullshit. you normally give first before going in
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:34 PM

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if certain angpau amount is compulsory dont invite them in the first place.

they come and be the guest already give face, if drive car also need to pay for carpark, petrol + toll also need to include,
and need to spend 3 to 4 hours sitting there see you kahwin eat other's daughter siham.
need to give angpau lagi, cukup beli nasi lemak 2 minggu di dalam, bukan rm2 lagi tu.

better than not coming.....
on second thought, RM100 for a meal is too expensive, if got kamcheng oklah, if only hi bye friend siapa mau layan lu kahwin.


if i go, i certainly pick those got history with me, rm100 can give them as blessing, those i do not know long enough, i wont go also.

This post has been edited by 9876789: Feb 6 2018, 02:37 PM
teehk_tee
post Feb 6 2018, 02:35 PM

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They are right about this.

Rm10 also face thick enough to give.
SUSeksk
post Feb 6 2018, 02:38 PM

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ni mesti olang mao muka invite every tom dick and harry to wedding dinner want to do big big but cannot afford.. friend never see since high school also invite datang .. when get ang pow kecik mengamuk pulak..
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post Feb 6 2018, 02:50 PM

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QUOTE(Avangelice @ Feb 6 2018, 02:34 PM)
bullshit. you normally give first before going in
*
Hello. Meals prepared next door la. See also no more appetite.
Lyu
post Feb 6 2018, 03:08 PM

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Ask ur fren to curse those gave RM 10 as wedding angpow to be forever alone
Ur fren also same, should invite real fren rather than some random pipu to fill up the table

That y i prefer Malay wedding

Owai

This post has been edited by Lyu: Feb 6 2018, 03:08 PM
tehoice
post Feb 6 2018, 04:12 PM

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as a cainis, i am more than happy to continue cainis tradition.

Angpow also depends on your "relationship" with the host, depending on how close you are with him/her as well as the location.

i start with 150 for chinese restaurant for not so close friend.

200 for closer friend in chinese restaurant.

250-300 for hotel standard.

2 of my best friend get married? i pao RM1k for each of them (for 2 pax) (diff year).

why so ambik kira such small money, I am more than honoured to be invited to those closer friends' wedding. if those I don't wanna go, I will just decline politely, no need to say ok will attend but pao only RM10-50. looks very fugly seriously.

pao 100 or 200 more will make me poor? no
pao 100 or 200 less will make me rich? no

meanwhile you're willing to splurge on 15 bucks artisan coffee 100 bucks dinner, 500 bucks per bottle of good spirit when drinking, 700 bucks mnd, 200 bucks games, 4k ipong.

it's only my little blessings to the married couple.

nowadays still got ppl pao less than 100 to wedding? dafuq LEL.
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post Feb 6 2018, 04:15 PM

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QUOTE(acbc @ Feb 6 2018, 02:50 PM)
Hello. Meals prepared next door la. See also no more appetite.
*
wah that one is memang West malaysia style...wait this is Malay or Chinese wedding you attend.
superbike
post Feb 6 2018, 04:53 PM

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are chinese really that demanding as if rm10 angpao is nothing to them?
powerlinkers
post Feb 6 2018, 05:03 PM

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TS: It is not nice for your friend to judge people in that manner.

In my personal opinion:
- if you have a low class friend: it is unfair not to invite him ; if you had invited him: do not expect any monetary in-kind in return. He would have spent a large sum of money just to take leave and reach your wedding function.
-it not necessarily a middle class person would be able give monetary gift of RM150-200/head. Everyone has their own commitments.
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post Feb 6 2018, 05:13 PM

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Opinion. If wedding in normal vegetarian restaurant i give rm100 ok anot.
PS , i left at 4th dish out of 9 dishes coz not a vege lover anyway lol

This post has been edited by kkk8787: Feb 6 2018, 05:14 PM
phas3r
post Feb 6 2018, 05:14 PM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM)
if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
*
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post Feb 6 2018, 05:18 PM

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QUOTE(szaku89 @ Feb 6 2018, 02:33 PM)
Don't shame yourselves with RM10 wedding ang pow. You know your name and ang pow amount is recorded right don't you? Just tell them cannot attend problem solved.
*
i got one friend, so melampau till din come also din inform lol. Sampai i reserve seat for hin everyone put empty plate for him n put all the food on that dish he din turn up also. 2 days later he just said oh i was busy lol. Which one worse, ffk or rm10 ang pau
ziniowong
post Feb 6 2018, 05:22 PM

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calculative or not is not an issue....if cant afford it just dont attend reception lo
danabu
post Feb 6 2018, 05:25 PM

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If a person can receive 15 ap with RM 10.... Then i think he should think why people did this to him liao.... Lol
1qaz1qaz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:28 PM

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QUOTE(beahappyman @ Feb 6 2018, 10:49 AM)
ekonomi bad. people have rough life now.

if you happen to bao rm10, just dun get your name written down.

after all who the hell know how much you bao?

win.
*
LOOOOL u dont know la hahah

now most wedding dinner (or atleast for chinese wedding) they ady allocate which table to u, so when u arrived u need to "check in" and get your table.
and thats the time u give your angpau and the receptionist will note down ur name on the angpau liao lol
1qaz1qaz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:30 PM

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QUOTE(cckkpr @ Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM)
Those who said RM10 nothing wrong.....when you get married and 30% of the guests give RM10, can you accept?

That will be your answer
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"dont have big head, dont wear big hat"
1qaz1qaz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:33 PM

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QUOTE(zorbyss. @ Feb 6 2018, 11:10 AM)
i've been to a few cainis wedding that don't take angpau.
still wedding cost are expected to be spent. only old uncles like my dad generation take wedding dinner as a profit.
i told my friend i dont wanna check angpau when i'm getting married. well, some said, they keep a list of names and their angpaus. how much they gib then when it's their wedding you gib back how much.
cainis. manyak kira la.
before you trigger. ayam cainis. hainanese x teochew if you're curious.
*
not only the red angpau but the white angpau also got list one
#cainis
SUSamon_meiz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:38 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
QUOTE(ocphangaz @ Feb 6 2018, 08:08 AM)
RM10 for kids? kfc also need RM12 nowadays... RM10 for CNY is so cheapskate too... hari raya also people give RM10

how's that burn feel to you?
*
QUOTE(nightshade_nova @ Feb 6 2018, 08:20 AM)
If close then should be no problem. They will understand. Im just saying in general situation, independent of any extenuating circumstances.
You said it yourself. RM10 also cant buy KFC, thats why its cheapskate.
Raya and CNY give to a lot of kids ang pows vs wedding which is one party only.
Bottom line is only the people who host the wedding's perception is important, not other people.
How important they are to you, how understanding they are, and how important it is that you want to keep a good image of yourself.

You dont tell how much you give, people wont know also.
*
I think when u invite people to ur wedding
U want them to be there right?
Not their money

The way u guys been complaining
Its like u guys just care about angpow
Not about friends being there during ur wedding

I agree that the angpow need to be adequate in value
But that shouldn't be the priority

I mean, if this matter so much
Next time make it like a paid event
Wanna come. Pay rm50 or rm100
No pay. No come

May look like bad. But at least u guys are honest to the guest
There won't be complaining behind later on

Things like this that tear family and friends apart
Money really is the root of evil


My wedding, i dont even ask for angpow
Dont really care

Parent calculate, got more than 10k

Not necessarily cover my cost
But it doesnt matter
That isnt the priority
If 0 also i dont mind
Because i want them to be there during my happy day
Not their money

Maybe u guys got rm10 angpow
Because those guests dont like u in the first place?
Maybe u kinda... A cheapskate calculative asshole
Hence why they gib so little angpow
1qaz1qaz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:44 PM

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QUOTE(tehoice @ Feb 6 2018, 04:12 PM)
as a cainis, i am more than happy to continue cainis tradition.

Angpow also depends on your "relationship" with the host, depending on how close you are with him/her as well as  the location.

i start with 150 for chinese restaurant for not so close friend.

200 for closer friend in chinese restaurant.

250-300 for hotel standard.

2 of my best friend get married? i pao RM1k for each of them (for 2 pax) (diff year).

why so ambik kira such small money, I am more than honoured to be invited to those closer friends' wedding. if those I don't wanna go, I will just decline politely, no need to say ok will attend but pao only RM10-50. looks very fugly seriously.

pao 100 or 200 more will make me poor? no
pao 100 or 200 less will make me rich? no

meanwhile you're willing to splurge on 15 bucks artisan coffee 100 bucks dinner, 500 bucks per bottle of good spirit when drinking, 700 bucks mnd, 200 bucks games, 4k ipong.

it's only my little blessings to the married couple.

nowadays still got ppl pao less than 100 to wedding? dafuq LEL.
*
is all about how much u can afford and the mindset la
whats if your best friend "sei dong" wedding but u can only afford rm10? then if im your best friend i will understand and happy if u attend the wedding without the angpau.

Exiled_Gundam
post Feb 6 2018, 05:47 PM

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QUOTE(cckkpr @ Feb 6 2018, 10:53 AM)
Those who said RM10 nothing wrong.....when you get married and 30% of the guests give RM10, can you accept?

That will be your answer
*
If people don't give also I'm ok.
COOLPINK
post Feb 6 2018, 05:49 PM

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hahaha! typical la tis type of wedding.

good old days invite to wedding is for friends to celebrate your happiness together.
dun care you give how much as long just attend good enough already.

nowadays invite you to wedding so can make profit and also show off to your friends and relatives laugh.gif

paletteLIFE
post Feb 6 2018, 05:49 PM

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RM10 is fine. Do wtv I want with my money la
uzary
post Feb 6 2018, 05:52 PM

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just wondering, not racing or anything, for chinese wedding that held in a hotel, is it a must to give angpow? is this the culture? and the angpow got minimum amount too?
SUSamon_meiz
post Feb 6 2018, 05:57 PM

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QUOTE(uzary @ Feb 6 2018, 05:52 PM)
just wondering, not racing or anything, for chinese wedding that held in a hotel, is it a must to give angpow? is this the culture? and the angpow got minimum amount too?
*
11 pages of this thread already scream "YES"
ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:00 PM

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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 05:57 PM)
11 pages of this thread already scream "YES"
*
QUOTE(uzary @ Feb 6 2018, 05:52 PM)
just wondering, not racing or anything, for chinese wedding that held in a hotel, is it a must to give angpow? is this the culture? and the angpow got minimum amount too?
*
This is gotong royong culture.

Kahwin. Orang meninggal dunia. We all chip in to share the burden.

Kalau nak makan free. Not that day.
ozak
post Feb 6 2018, 06:01 PM

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QUOTE(steveabutt @ Feb 6 2018, 04:36 PM)
calm down bro. Let me rephrase. No one is forcing u to pay, u can just give rm10 angpow no problem but know that u can't stop ppl from judging either. The wedding couple will in return give u more or less same kind of courtesy u showed. No big deal.

What i really don't get is ppl who give angpow rm10 damn paranoid scare ppl judge them, it's like ppl who choose to drive proton due to whatever the principle but die die want ppl to agree with them driving proton is super good only sohai drive foreign car.
*
When you send out the invitation card, you already forcing them to pay. Can the guy not coming and not pay ? No.

Out of courtesy, he still have to pay even not coming. And you said no one is forcing ?

"The wedding couple will in return give u more or less same kind of courtesy u showed." <-- this kind of altitude already farking damn bad. It is like a revenge to the guess that give less ang pau. Damn farking kira. And you said no big deal ?



ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:04 PM

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QUOTE(steveabutt @ Feb 6 2018, 01:07 PM)
Normally the wedding couple will record the amount of angpow given in the guest list so that can refer back how much angpow to give in return if the said person invite u to wedding. I think it is common courtesy la u attend ppl's wedding u help to chip in some money to cover ur own portion as a blessing to the married couple.

Handphone bill rm100-200 also u no problem pay every month, some ppl drink starbuck coffee every other day. But friend who is close enough to invite u to wedding u dont even want to chip in RM50 as a blessing? Tells a lot about ur personality leh. In the end the merrid couple will just take the wedding bill as a tuition fee to learn more about u.
*
Not many understand this culture.

Looking for a free meal and take advantage of the young couple?
ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:05 PM

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QUOTE(ozak @ Feb 6 2018, 06:01 PM)
When you send out the invitation card, you already forcing them to pay. Can the guy not coming and not pay ? No.

Out of courtesy, he still have to pay even not coming. And you said no one is forcing ?

"The wedding couple will in return give u more or less same kind of courtesy u showed." <-- this kind of altitude already farking damn bad. It is like a revenge to the guess that give less ang pau. Damn farking kira. And you said no big deal ?
*
Who told you must pay even if not attending?


SUSamon_meiz
post Feb 6 2018, 06:05 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:00 PM)
This is gotong royong culture.

Kahwin. Orang meninggal dunia. We all chip in to share the burden.

Kalau nak makan free. Not that day.
*
Which is wrong
Wedding isnt gotong royong

Wedding is an event where u celebrate ur happiness with other people

Asking for other people money really shit on that sentiment

Wedding isnt a burden
If u cant afford wedding ceremonies, maybe u shouldn't get wed

Or have a smaller less grandeur weddings

It really boggles my mind
How people cant see
The ludicrous irony
In having grand wedding, show off

Then expect the guest to foot the bill
Its really... Ridiculous

Like i said
If u really tight on money
Make it a paid event

Pay first. Then enter
Like a buffet restaurant
At least theres honesty in that method

What happen now
Complaining behing guest back
Its not only cheapskate
But really sickening

SUSamon_meiz
post Feb 6 2018, 06:06 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:04 PM)
Not many understand this culture.

Looking for a free meal  and take advantage of the young couple?
*
U kawin
Why people need to pay?

Dont want give free meal?
Then dont invite people

Cook at home
1 rice cooker
Eat with parent
Setel
Done

U kawin
Ur wedding
Tapi guest kena bayar the cost

Wth
ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:07 PM

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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 06:05 PM)
Which is wrong
Wedding isnt gotong royong

Wedding is an event where u celebrate ur happiness with other people

Asking for other people money really shit on that sentiment

Wedding isnt a burden
If u cant afford wedding ceremonies, maybe u shouldn't get wed

Or have a smaller less grandeur weddings

It really boggles my mind
How people cant see
The ludicrous irony
In having grand wedding, show off

Then expect the guest to foot the bill
Its really... Ridiculous

Like i said
If u really tight on money
Make it a paid event

Pay first. Then enter
Like a buffet restaurant
At least theres honesty in that method

What happen now
Complaining behing guest back
Its not only cheapskate
But really sickening
*
Thats how some can survive everywhere without walking stick.

They help among themselves.

Tak payah nak pura pura sincerity or what.


Either you nak makan free or you cheapskate.


Tak mampu? Dont attend. Dont pay.
ozak
post Feb 6 2018, 06:08 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:05 PM)
Who told you must pay even if not attending?
*
From your grandfather time.

Your friend send an invitation card to you. If you not going for the dinner, you don't pay ?


Kaitodesuuu
post Feb 6 2018, 06:09 PM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM)
if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
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Wedding now fucking expensive you don't know meh
ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:10 PM

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I gave rm200 300 angpao for my buddy wedding when the table is just rm1k.

So how much did you all help your buddies?

Rm10?
COOLPINK
post Feb 6 2018, 06:10 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:00 PM)
This is gotong royong culture.

Kahwin. Orang meninggal dunia. We all chip in to share the burden.

Kalau nak makan free. Not that day.
*
share burden i agree.
but some do it like tell you must pay $$$ amount.

true friends will be very happy and appreciate that you took your time from your busy life to attend and not looking to get money.

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post Feb 6 2018, 06:10 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:07 PM)
Thats how some can survive everywhere without walking stick.

They help among themselves.

Tak payah nak pura pura sincerity or what.
Either you nak makan free or you cheapskate.
Tak mampu? Dont attend. Dont pay.
*
Sure. Can help
But u cant force people to give specific amount of money

Help is based on sincerity.
Rm10 also consider help.

Again. If u need to help to kawin
Maybe u shouldn't
Maybe the event is too much, lower the cost, cancel few needless stuff

Of course makan free
Thats the point of wedding
U treat other people during your happy days

Its like birthday.
U treat other people cake

Do u ask for guest money before u hand them the cake?
TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 06:11 PM

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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 06:06 PM)
U kawin
Why people need to pay?

Dont want give free meal?
Then dont invite people

Cook at home
1 rice cooker
Eat with parent
Setel
Done

U kawin
Ur wedding
Tapi guest kena bayar the cost

Wth
*
There are no sincerity in most chinese weddings except if stated angpao is not necessary. Is a cultural expectation thing for the guests to help the couple, and the couple to throw a big dinner for friends and relatives. In most case, the angpao can cover for 80% of the cost of the dinner.

buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 06:12 PM

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youngsters i tell you. all you see is ppl come to your wedding to tengok you kahwin.

no. it's your mother's excuse to gather all her lama tak jumpa friends and relatives to makan minum borak.
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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:10 PM)
I gave rm200 300 angpao for my  buddy wedding when the table is just rm1k.

So how much did you all help your buddies?

Rm10?
*
I give him free food for his guest and free doorgift for him
500 sets of them. So that he can distribute among his guests

But i dont ask for anything in return
He also dont ask money from other people

Thats the point
U help however u like

Forcing people to give hundreds of ringgit for angpow
Then condemn and bitch bout them behind their back if they didn't

Isnt right.
That isnt what a friend should do
ohman
post Feb 6 2018, 06:13 PM

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QUOTE(ozak @ Feb 6 2018, 06:08 PM)
From your grandfather time.

Your friend send an invitation card to you. If you not going for the dinner, you don't pay ?
*
My buddy i go= rm200 300
My buddy i no go = rm100 min
Orang masak i go= rm100
Orang masak i no go = rm 50( if tell early. If last minute no go i pay full rm100)
Orang tak masak i go= market rate
Orang tak masak i no go = no pay.


SUSamon_meiz
post Feb 6 2018, 06:14 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 06:11 PM)
There are no sincerity in most chinese weddings except if stated angpao is not necessary. Is a cultural expectation thing for the guests to help the couple, and the couple to throw a big dinner for friends and relatives. In most case, the angpao can cover for 80% of the cost of the dinner.
*
Its really sad
Why has it turn out to be like this

Malay also have this culture
But i think isnt as deep rooted as chinese


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post Feb 6 2018, 06:19 PM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM)
if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
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This
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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 06:14 PM)
Its really sad
Why has it turn out to be like this

Malay also have this culture
But i think isnt as deep rooted as chinese
*
Yes this is a stupid culture and its practice should be stopped
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:21 PM

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reminds of a story.

two man one rich and one poor went to a temple.
the rich man donated $10,000.
the poor man only donated $1.

the rich man was so proud and bragging to all around of what he have done.
upon seeing this the holy man stand up and said:

"The rich man gave his donation out of his wealth; but the poor man out of his poverty put in all he had"

simply put the rich man only donated 0.1% of his wealth while the poor man donated 100% everything he had.
this story i think many know but have forgotten.

so tell me who gave the bigger angpow at wedding?

This post has been edited by COOLPINK: Feb 6 2018, 06:22 PM
dagnarus
post Feb 6 2018, 06:22 PM

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People should be entitled to give whatever they think they can afford rather than dictating a minimum. No one should be obliged to pay a certain amount, that's like not a donation anymore but rather fees.


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post Feb 6 2018, 06:22 PM

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QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:21 PM)
reminds of a story.

two man one rich and one poor went to a temple.
the rich man donated $10,000.
the poor man only donated $1.

the rich man was so proud and bragging to all around of what he have done.
upon seeing this the holy man stand up and said:

"The rich man gave his gdonation out of his wealth; but the poor man out of his poverty put in all he had"

simply put the rich man only donated 0.1% of his wealth while the poor man donated 100% everything he had.
this story i think many know but have forgotten.

so tell me who gave the bigger angpow at wedding?
*
the lansi $10k went on to feed a hundred ppl.

the $1 did fak all for anyone.

it's just plain sohai righteousness.


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post Feb 6 2018, 06:23 PM

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QUOTE(dagnarus @ Feb 6 2018, 06:22 PM)
People should be entitled to give whatever they think they can afford rather than dictating a minimum. No one should be obliged to pay a certain amount, that's like not a donation anymore but rather fees.
*
fees you get resit la.
this one call extortion laugh.gif
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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 06:12 PM)
I give him free food for his guest and free doorgift for him
500 sets of them. So that he can distribute among his guests

But i dont ask for anything in return
He also dont ask money from other people

Thats the point
U help however u like

Forcing people to give hundreds of ringgit for angpow
Then condemn and bitch bout them behind their back if they didn't

Isnt right.
That isnt what a friend should do
*
Who is forcing you?



I like the gotong royong idea. I dont like the witchhunt. Cheapskate is inevitable
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:25 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:23 PM)
Who is forcing you?



I like  the gotong royong idea.  I dont like the witchhunt.  Cheapskate is inevitable
*
U dont like the witchhunt?
Yet u here repeating "cheapskate" like a broken records

Dont be a hypocrite man
COOLPINK
post Feb 6 2018, 06:28 PM

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QUOTE(buysellaccount @ Feb 6 2018, 06:22 PM)
the lansi $10k went on to feed a hundred ppl.

the $1 did fak all for anyone.

it's just plain sohai righteousness.
*
the lansi donated $10k to show off.
you think if nobody there to see he will give?
slowly wait la rclxs0.gif

buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 06:29 PM

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QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:28 PM)
the lansi donated $10k to show off.
you think if nobody there to see he will give?
slowly wait la rclxs0.gif
*
then give him a reason to donate. show off la kasi poster advertisement whatever.

10k is 10k.

no need pendidikan moral 1 ringgit feed fak all.
C63 AMG
post Feb 6 2018, 06:30 PM

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Alamak not this story again.
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:30 PM

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im not taking sides here.
but there are actually cheapskate people out there.
filthy rich but kedekut until level 99. doh.gif
zeist
post Feb 6 2018, 06:30 PM

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If me i do buffet style at a rent banglo with swimming pool and wide space

Do at hotel waste money

Hire lantiao emcee talk cock on stage. Better get your relative with excellent english to chair it

One table 2k cannot eat full. And i wonder how the fcuk they calculate 1 table 2k. The dishes are average.

If put 50 table means 100k. 50 table means 500 guests.

Similantiao you invite so many people for?

Close friends and relative each side 100 pax. Both side 200 pax. Buffet style do high class a bit. 50k budget is enough

Pay so much money to rent the place but make your guests stomach growling and back home unhappy
digilife
post Feb 6 2018, 06:32 PM

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Just ask around how much that dinner table for 1 pax will cost, for eg, if the cost per pax is rm100, the mininum you must put into that angpow is rm100.

The amt itself reflects your EQ which is important to yourself.

Respect others means respect oneself.

If you dun understand this now, you will one day later in life.




sunami
post Feb 6 2018, 06:32 PM

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QUOTE(smallcrab @ Feb 6 2018, 09:04 AM)
people short of cash now, CNY coming

so gip RM10 loh instead or RM100
*
100 also little la..
one table 1k+ without wine beer and liquor
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:32 PM

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Takpelah. Maybe they gave what is within their capabilities.
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:35 PM

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QUOTE(zeist @ Feb 6 2018, 06:30 PM)
If me i do buffet style at a rent banglo with swimming pool and wide space

Do at hotel waste money

Hire lantiao emcee talk cock on stage. Better get your relative with excellent english to chair it

One table 2k cannot eat full. And i wonder how the fcuk they calculate 1 table 2k. The dishes are average.

If put 50 table means 100k. 50 table means 500 guests.

Similantiao you invite so many people for?

Close friends and relative each side 100 pax. Both side 200 pax. Buffet style do high class a bit. 50k budget is enough

Pay so much money to rent the place but make your guests stomach growling and back home unhappy
*
ooo... this ia actually a pretty good idea. banglow, nay, mansion with huge lawn with fairy lights and the money used to rent the stupid hotels, can go to decor and better food. Later can swim somemore
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:39 PM

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QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 06:32 PM)
Just ask around how much that dinner table for 1 pax will cost, for eg, if the cost per pax is rm100, the mininum you must put into that angpow is rm100.

The amt itself reflects your EQ which is important to yourself.

Respect others means respect oneself.

If you dun understand this now, you will one day later in life.
*
I kompious now, who treat who? rclxub.gif
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QUOTE(buysellaccount @ Feb 6 2018, 06:29 PM)
then give him a reason to donate. show off la kasi poster advertisement whatever.

10k is 10k.

no need pendidikan moral 1 ringgit feed fak all.
*
poster advertisement whatever no need money meh?
after deduct left how much?

so if someone ask you to betray your friend for 10k i think you will do it since you no need moral.


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post Feb 6 2018, 06:48 PM

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QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:46 PM)
poster advertisement whatever no need money meh?
after deduct left how much?

so if someone ask you to betray your friend for 10k i think you will do it since you no need moral.
*
tanya itik, jawab lembu. like stupid.

even after advertisement still more than $1 in that dumb moral story of yours.
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QUOTE(tvcat @ Feb 6 2018, 06:39 PM)
I kompious now, who treat who? rclxub.gif
*
this.... thumbup.gif laugh.gif
NielWooWoo1205
post Feb 6 2018, 06:49 PM

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QUOTE(tohff7 @ Feb 6 2018, 11:50 AM)
It's not just Chinese. Even Malays nowadays also do grand weddings.

Just that Chinese been doing it long enough and there's already pre-established "market rates" that one ideally should give
*
Malays have been doing grand wedding since like forever,not new but never ever ever they expect their guests to give them big angpao. Maybe some got but never ever

This is why my Chinese grandma tell me no need to attend Chinese weddings. If die die need to go she told me I need to bring her

This post has been edited by NielWooWoo1205: Feb 6 2018, 06:50 PM
COOLPINK
post Feb 6 2018, 06:49 PM

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QUOTE(buysellaccount @ Feb 6 2018, 06:48 PM)
tanya itik, jawab lembu. like stupid.

even after advertisement still more than $1 in that dumb moral story of yours.
*
well at least you show your true character - no morals laugh.gif
buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 06:51 PM

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QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:49 PM)
well at least you show your true character - no morals  laugh.gif
*
err, no.

you would rather take $1 and let the orphans makan pasir.

you're the one without morals.

it's more important for you to feel righteous than to feed the orphans.
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:55 PM

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QUOTE(ohman @ Feb 6 2018, 06:13 PM)
My buddy i go= rm200 300
My buddy i no go = rm100 min
Orang masak i go= rm100
Orang masak i no go = rm 50( if tell early. If last  minute no  go i pay full rm100)
Orang tak masak i go= market rate
Orang tak masak i no go = no pay.
*
What is orang masak ?

So you still got to pay ?
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post Feb 6 2018, 06:58 PM

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Wat heppen is ur fren bitter but also no face to put up put up requirement pf min RM200 per pax. Did he got write down name ask him to confront those PPL but likely he sked no face.
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QUOTE(buysellaccount @ Feb 6 2018, 06:51 PM)
err, no.

you would rather take $1 and let the orphans makan pasir.

you're the one without morals.

it's more important for you to feel righteous than to feed the orphans.
*
who said the holy man did not take the rich man donation?
he merely pointed out who gave more from their possesions.

you the one that said no need pendidikan moral not me and now trying to twist and turn.
too late for you man hahaha! rclxs0.gif


buysellaccount
post Feb 6 2018, 06:59 PM

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QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:58 PM)
who said the holy man did not take the rich man donation?
he merely pointed out who gave more from their possesions.

you the one that said no need pendidikan moral not me and now trying to twist and turn.
too late for you man hahaha! rclxs0.gif
*
oh, the irony.
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:03 PM

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My friend's wedding... His colleagues whole table tak de seorg kasi angpow... Then ask if food is halal or not... Hilton kl, still need to ask
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:04 PM

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QUOTE(tvcat @ Feb 6 2018, 06:39 PM)
I kompious now, who treat who? rclxub.gif
*
Your Fren invited you to his/her wedding dinner , ask around about how much per pax, angpow amt must be equal or over that per pax amount.

If you give the amt that is lower then the per pax amt , you are a disgrace to your ownself.


drowning
post Feb 6 2018, 07:06 PM

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QUOTE(ozak @ Feb 6 2018, 06:55 PM)
What is orang masak ?

So you still got to pay ?
*
Means he cannibal. Eat orang.
drowning
post Feb 6 2018, 07:09 PM

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QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 07:04 PM)
Your Fren invited you to his/her wedding dinner , ask around about how much per pax, angpow amt must be equal or over that per pax amount. 

If you give the amt that is lower then the per pax  amt , you are a disgrace to your ownself.
*
If it's a real friend, he doesn't care how much you wanna give.

If the friend want to show off kaya and expect other ppl to pay for it, then give him hell money enough dy.

Few of my friends kahwin, per table come up to 3k plus, never once they expect their friends and relatives give much or at all. They don't even setup Ang pow collection table. Just a nice vase for guest to drop the angpow.
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:09 PM

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once a friend of mine got married.. later his dad donate all ang paus from wedding to charity... respect
when i get married.. all come eat buffet all nice nice prawns crab and whatever fish la.. no need seating with unknown people
just come and eat and celebrate no need ang paus k... i belanja eat cos u all are my friends and family...
got dj hentam techno also .. i like mah...haha...drunk only go back k thanks for coming...

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post Feb 6 2018, 07:10 PM

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QUOTE(Kaitodesuuu @ Feb 6 2018, 06:09 PM)
Wedding now fucking expensive you don't know meh
*
It can be expensive if u want it to be expensive

If don't have money
Dont have grand wedding la

Sedar diri lor

QUOTE(COOLPINK @ Feb 6 2018, 06:23 PM)
fees you get resit la.
this one call extortion  laugh.gif
*
This lol
QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 06:32 PM)
Just ask around how much that dinner table for 1 pax will cost, for eg, if the cost per pax is rm100, the mininum you must put into that angpow is rm100.

The amt itself reflects your EQ which is important to yourself.

Respect others means respect oneself.

If you dun understand this now, you will one day later in life.
*
So kinda like going to restaurants?
But worse cuz more pack with people and u cant choose the menu?

QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 07:04 PM)
Your Fren invited you to his/her wedding dinner , ask around about how much per pax, angpow amt must be equal or over that per pax amount. 

If you give the amt that is lower then the per pax  amt , you are a disgrace to your ownself.
*
Asking people to pay for your own wedding is the biggest disgrace here

If u dont want. Dont do it
Make a personal event
Invite family only
Eat. Balik. Setel

Apa logic make grand wedding
Then ask guest to pay for that wedding

Walaoweh


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post Feb 6 2018, 07:10 PM

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QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 07:04 PM)
Your Fren invited you to his/her wedding dinner , ask around about how much per pax, angpow amt must be equal or over that per pax amount. 

If you give the amt that is lower then the per pax  amt , you are a disgrace to your ownself.
*
I still kompious, who treat who? rclxub.gif
KiRin_KisHi88
post Feb 6 2018, 07:12 PM

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lu ingat semua olang cina kaya ka? itu suda bagus la dia bagi RM10

kalau gua datang gua talak bagi duit maa, gua datang makan saja

apa lagi chinese wedding mau?
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:13 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
Even they don't give angpow is acceptable since u yang invite.
HarDiE
post Feb 6 2018, 07:19 PM

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Biar mati anak, jangan mati adat....


~owai..
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:23 PM

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QUOTE(1qaz1qaz @ Feb 6 2018, 05:44 PM)
is all about how much u can afford and the mindset la
whats if your best friend "sei dong" wedding but u can only afford rm10? then if im your best friend i will understand and happy if u attend the wedding without the angpau.
*
Don't BS that you can only afford RM10 lah dude. That is ultra super thick skin OK?

Your kepsi cost more than RM10.
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post Feb 6 2018, 07:24 PM

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QUOTE
Majority of Chinese are low-income earners, says economist

THE perception that all Chinese in Malaysia are wealthy is wrong as data from government agencies indicate that a majority are wage-earners in this community, said economist Dr Muhammed Abdul Khalid.

The DM Analytics founder and chief economist said wealth inequality among the Chinese is also highest compared with the Bumiputeras and Indians.

“When we talk about inequality or poverty, the gap between the races has actually decreased, compared with 40 years ago.

"Many people think the Chinese are rich. But that is not quite right. Yes, some of them are rich, but the majority of Chinese Malaysians is working class.


"The percentage does not differ much from the Bumiputeras, who are also working class," he told The Malaysian Insight.

Muhammed is the author of the bestselling The Colours of Inequality: Ethnicity, Class, Income and Wealth in Malaysia, published in 2014. The book has been translated into Bahasa Malaysia, Antara Dua Darjat: Agihan Pendapatan di Malaysia, and published last year.

Muhammed, who holds a doctorate from a leading university in France, said government data showed about eight in 10 Chinese were wage-earners.

"Data from the Statistics Department in 2016 showed that 70% of the Chinese were working class, compared with 72% Bumiputera and 83% Indians. 

“However, there are more Chinese employers at 8% than Bumiputera and Indian employers, which are both 3%," said Muhammed, who was formerly economist at Khazanah Research Institute (KRI) and the Institute for Strategic and International Studies (ISIS)

The income of wage-earners is not growing because owners and employers tend to keep a large portion of the profit for themselves instead of distributing it among the workers,  Muhammed said

"Income distribution to workers is still low. From every RM1 that we earn, how much does the government take through taxes; how much does the government earn; how much do the corporations profit?

“Income for workers is still low compared to capitalist countries, such as the United States, Britain, and Singapore. In Singapore, the workers’ share of the economy is bigger. Here, not so much,” he said.

Near poverty

As with the other ethnic groups in Malaysia, absolute poverty rates among the Chinese have dropped, to just 0.1%. The rate for Bumiputeras is 0.5%, and Indians, 0.1%. The country’s overall poverty rate is 0.4%.

The problem, said Muhammed, is that although there are comparatively few who were impoverished, there are many living on the brink of poverty.

"This is the situation Malaysians are in, regardless of race. 

“Among the Chinese, half of those who work earn a monthly salary of less than RM2,350. This is a difference of only about RM400 from Malays who work. The majority earn low salaries, not between RM5,000 and RM6,000."

The Chinese are adjudged wealthy because people make assessments based on what they see, Muhammed added.

"Sometimes, we sit in Bangsar and we see the Chinese and their Mercedes cars. That is an inaccurate picture. There are many more out there who are financially straitened.” – January 20, 2018.


https://www.themalaysianinsight.com/s/33423/

TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 07:38 PM

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QUOTE(tehoice @ Feb 6 2018, 07:23 PM)
Don't BS that you can only afford RM10 lah dude. That is ultra super thick skin OK?

Your kepsi cost more than RM10.
*
What is your opinion if people say the guest should be able to give any amount sincerely, no market price since this is an invitation. And guests should not be forced to pay for the wedding dinner so if can't afford, do a smaller one.

This post has been edited by Coup De Grace: Feb 6 2018, 07:38 PM
IReallyNeed Answers
post Feb 6 2018, 07:47 PM

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Calculative sial, dah ambik then forget about it la.

Rm10 maybe family kot,

During tea ceremony already give a lot,

So dinner pay as token jer
v1n0d
post Feb 6 2018, 07:48 PM

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To be honest, you can’t be calculative about these things. What I like about the Chinese culture here is that there’s an understanding that when you attend a wedding dinner, your ang pow should be at “market value” depending on where the dinner is hosted and if alcohol is served.

Good luck getting anything close to that at Indian/Malay weddings. I’ve seen families with 5 kids come and sapu the food without even gifting a cent. At the end of the day, when we host a wedding dinner, it’s with the intention of sharing our special day with those invited. It’s their presence that matters. smile.gif
digilife
post Feb 6 2018, 07:53 PM

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QUOTE(drowning @ Feb 6 2018, 07:09 PM)
If it's a real friend, he doesn't care how much you wanna give.

If the friend want to show off kaya and expect other ppl to pay for it, then give him hell money enough dy.

Few of my friends kahwin, per table come up to 3k plus, never once they expect their friends and relatives give much or at all. They don't even setup Ang pow collection table. Just a nice vase for guest to drop the angpow.
*
Not everyone have rich frens like you

We are just peasant , not 20k earners
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post Feb 6 2018, 08:11 PM

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QUOTE(steveabutt @ Feb 6 2018, 07:02 PM)
harlo ur idea terpesong there please dont embarrass urself any further. Normally wedding couple will call u up and ask u whether u want to go or not, then only send out invitation card. If u have such friend that send invitation card without confirming ur attendance then fuck him, no need to force urself to go, no need to pay. Just call him up and say not free not going. Is it that hard?

It's really very simple 1 la. Common courtesy is that married couple only invite friends who are close enough, they will form a list then call up 1 by 1 announce they getting married on xxx date ask if u wanna attend or not. Those who use facebook send mass invitation is never your friend to begin with. So fuck them la, just tell them u are not close not gonna attend wish them well. Same thing with long lost friend who never contact u once at all since 10-20 years back suddenly call u up and ask u to attend his/her wedding. Fuck those kind of "friend" too cos they normally are cheapskate that got no friend, too late to make friend, no one attending their wedding so got no choice have to dig out old school autograph book beg ppl to go their wedding. U want to fuck them up by not paying then its ok, up to u but dont go around telling ppl u give rm10 angpow is "normal standard" cos its not.
*
This
Lada Putih
post Feb 6 2018, 08:28 PM

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QUOTE(+3kk! @ Feb 6 2018, 11:35 AM)
if you get married and need people to pay for something, theres something wrong there.

its like i say, EH BRO I BELANJA U MAKAN, BUT U PAYME RM50 upfront ya!
*
see it this way
in a malay wedding
friends would comes with things like
gas dapur ke, barang masak ke, katil ke, things like that and in return they get a kenduri lunch. see it that way
just following the tradition of "i help you, you help me"

as far as i understand how the culture goes for chinese wedding, its almost the same concept.
like in old days we are invited to the wedding, we know we are all not that rich,
neighber may bring ayam ke, itik ke, babi ke, sayur ke, potato ke apa lanjiao pun boleh bawa, sumua kampung boleh celebrate
but as we progress into a modern society, Money replaces all those essentials coz simpler, and faster.
home cook and temporary self made outdoor kitchen replaced with pro hoteliers or restaurant.

the concept will still going to be there. We never really mind the how much the guest will give or not gives or not.
To give is a form of respect, "approval" and "give faces". and in order to "give faces" as far as i understand how it goes here in Semenanjung,
depends heavily on the relationship between the persons and the family,
the angpao will be appropriate according to the custom and names will be written on the angpao to show the "approval" and "appreciation" towards the family

in kampung sarawak sabah however, still got the old Custom of giving RM50 with no name written
as "from whom" are not important but it tells the Main Family how their relationship with their peers or friends and the people around them.
if you're being a dick, folks will just give you little or may even not show up at all (how many empty tables)
if you're a rather popular person, you will highly unlikely to receive a mah jibai RM10,
to gib something that is so small is to show disapproval and disappointment towards the person
and often seems as extremely rude. almost like rubbing chopstick together in front of a japenese sushi chef. "its like calling him Cheap"
might as well dont give at all and keep quiet. datswai keep it quiet and nameless on the angpao.
its a mechanism of an old custom especially if we were in a small village, sendiri pandai pandai la.

[edit]
heres a couple of examples for Semenanjung wedding that i attended to
"Latok" dotter is getting married, my father/mother know the "latok" or the Datin - Gib angpao "RM500" write name there,
Boss in a small town, anak boss kahwin, father/mother cannot attend, I as a son come as well - gib angpao "rm300" no name written but show face with salesman and manager. big boss happy.
Jibai ppl who never really bother talking to us is getting married, because know him only but regardless he come up one day show faces ask us if we could come, we come la - gib angpao "rm50" no name written. bring crates of beer, we become good friend today and hopefully after today we can actually be friends instead of "hi-bye" acquaintances.

in small town kampung rural area
friend is getting married, close friend gib more but also no name, will bring pork and beer also to celebrate
rich friend is getting married in grand hotel, we all know he is particularly rich and do very very well and never complains about money, we also gib "rm50" but show faces and if got afterparty and bachelor night, we tapao or at least try to tapao.
poor friend is getting married, poor friend is hardworking and not bad of a fellow, very good friend. knows he always has money problem due to maybe hospital bill for mother or father
but he is very rajin and doesnt do gambling or drink heavily or even main amoi, everyday go work come back cook at home one
we help him "secretly" also tapao angpao inside from rm1k, if he come up to us and even ask for loan, we BAGI aje if possible to show appreciation, confirm before wedding finish can see him crying due to appreciation.

This post has been edited by Lada Putih: Feb 6 2018, 08:40 PM
TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 08:38 PM

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QUOTE(Lada Putih @ Feb 6 2018, 08:28 PM)
see it this way
in a malay wedding
friends would comes with things like
gas dapur ke, barang masak ke, katil ke, things like that and in return they get a kenduri lunch. see it that way
just following the tradition of "i help you, you help me"

as far as i understand how the culture goes for chinese wedding, its almost the same concept.
like in old days we are invited to the wedding, we know we are all not that rich,
neighber may bring ayam ke, itik ke, babi ke, sayur ke, potato ke apa lanjiao pun boleh bawa, sumua kampung boleh celebrate
but as we progress into a modern society, Money replaces all those essentials coz simpler, and faster.
home cook and temporary self made outdoor kitchen replaced with pro hoteliers or restaurant.

the concept will still going to be there. We never really mind the how much the guest will give or not gives or not.
To give is a form of respect, "approval" and "give faces". and in order to "give faces" as far as i understand how it goes here in Semenanjung,
depends heavily on the relationship between the persons and the family,
the angpao will be appropriate according to the custom and names will be written on the angpao to show the "approval" and "appreciation" towards the family

in kampung sarawak sabah however, still got the old Custom of giving RM50 with no name written
as "from whom" are not important but it tells the Main Family how their relationship with their peers or friends and the people around them.
if you're being a dick, folks will just give you little or may even not show up at all (how many empty tables)
if you're a rather popular person, you will highly unlikely to receive a mah jibai RM10,
to gib something that is so small is to show disapproval and disappointment towards the person
and often seems as extremely rude. almost like rubbing chopstick together in front of a japenese sushi chef. "its like calling him Cheap"
might as well dont give at all and keep quiet. datswai keep it quiet and nameless on the angpao.
its a mechanism of an old custom especially if we were in a small village, sendiri pandai pandai la.
*
good point
SUSkevin23
post Feb 6 2018, 08:44 PM

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Very simple. U dont want pay, dont go.

U want to go, u give . Minimum RM100

Rm10 is a joke. My as well dont go

This post has been edited by kevin23: Feb 6 2018, 08:45 PM
Lada Putih
post Feb 6 2018, 08:51 PM

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QUOTE(runemastertan @ Feb 6 2018, 11:35 AM)
Most chinese use wedding as a profit event. Giving anything less than what they expect and shit comes out from their mouth
*
read my recent post above, i hope i could explain it better.
the "shit comes out from their mouth" i understand very much.
but to only gib rm10 is like calling the relationship you have with the host "very cheap"
anybody would be offended as if they only worth "rm10"
1qaz1qaz
post Feb 6 2018, 09:02 PM

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QUOTE(tehoice @ Feb 6 2018, 07:23 PM)
Don't BS that you can only afford RM10 lah dude. That is ultra super thick skin OK?

Your kepsi cost more than RM10.
*
ya u can afford it does not mean everyone can

and i din say giving rm10 is reasonable for TS case, im saying base on ur example given that u give rm1000 for your best friend wedding
and if they are your best friend they wont mind even if u give rm1 rm10 rm1000
nightshade_nova
post Feb 6 2018, 09:07 PM

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QUOTE(amon_meiz @ Feb 6 2018, 05:38 PM)
I think when u invite people to ur wedding
U want them to be there right?
Not their money

The way u guys been complaining
Its like u guys just care about angpow
Not about friends being there during ur wedding

I agree that the angpow need to be adequate in value
But that shouldn't be the priority

I mean, if this matter so much
Next time make it like a paid event
Wanna come. Pay rm50 or rm100
No pay. No come

May look like bad. But at least u guys are honest to the guest
There won't be complaining behind later on

Things like this that tear family and friends apart
Money really is the root of evil
My wedding, i dont even ask for angpow
Dont really care

Parent calculate, got more than 10k

Not necessarily cover my cost
But it doesnt matter
That isnt the priority
If 0 also i dont mind
Because i want them to be there during my happy day
Not their money

Maybe u guys got rm10 angpow
Because those guests dont like u in the first place?
Maybe u kinda... A cheapskate calculative asshole
Hence why they gib so little angpow
*
I already told you what is important is the image between you and the people getting married.
I only generalized in a sense that it is what most people would think.

If I ever get married, I wont care people give me money or not also.


Zanei Gundan
post Feb 6 2018, 09:18 PM

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buat potluck ah senang

sendiri datang bawak lauk masing2

no issue angpow singit 10 ringit dah
KitZhai
post Feb 6 2018, 09:26 PM

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That's y I always hope I don't kena bomb, I poorfag give rm88 only
+3kk!
post Feb 6 2018, 09:32 PM

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QUOTE(Lada Putih @ Feb 6 2018, 08:28 PM)
see it this way
in a malay wedding
friends would comes with things like
gas dapur ke, barang masak ke, katil ke, things like that and in return they get a kenduri lunch. see it that way
just following the tradition of "i help you, you help me"

as far as i understand how the culture goes for chinese wedding, its almost the same concept.
like in old days we are invited to the wedding, we know we are all not that rich,
neighber may bring ayam ke, itik ke, babi ke, sayur ke, potato ke apa lanjiao pun boleh bawa, sumua kampung boleh celebrate
but as we progress into a modern society, Money replaces all those essentials coz simpler, and faster.
home cook and temporary self made outdoor kitchen replaced with pro hoteliers or restaurant.

the concept will still going to be there. We never really mind the how much the guest will give or not gives or not.
To give is a form of respect, "approval" and "give faces". and in order to "give faces" as far as i understand how it goes here in Semenanjung,
depends heavily on the relationship between the persons and the family,
the angpao will be appropriate according to the custom and names will be written on the angpao to show the "approval" and "appreciation" towards the family

in kampung sarawak sabah however, still got the old Custom of giving RM50 with no name written
as "from whom" are not important but it tells the Main Family how their relationship with their peers or friends and the people around them.
if you're being a dick, folks will just give you little or may even not show up at all (how many empty tables)
if you're a rather popular person, you will highly unlikely to receive a mah jibai RM10,
to gib something that is so small is to show disapproval and disappointment towards the person
and often seems as extremely rude. almost like rubbing chopstick together in front of a japenese sushi chef. "its like calling him Cheap"
might as well dont give at all and keep quiet. datswai keep it quiet and nameless on the angpao.
its a mechanism of an old custom especially if we were in a small village, sendiri pandai pandai la.

[edit]
heres a couple of examples for Semenanjung wedding that i attended to
"Latok" dotter is getting married, my father/mother know the "latok" or the Datin - Gib angpao "RM500" write name there,
Boss in a small town, anak boss kahwin, father/mother cannot attend, I as a son come as well - gib angpao "rm300" no name written but show face with salesman and manager. big boss happy.
Jibai ppl who never really bother talking to us is getting married, because know him only but regardless he come up one day show faces ask us if we could come, we come la - gib angpao "rm50" no name written. bring crates of beer, we become good friend today and hopefully after today we can actually be friends instead of "hi-bye" acquaintances.

in small town kampung rural area
friend is getting married, close friend gib more but also no name, will bring pork and beer also to celebrate
rich friend is getting married in grand hotel, we all know he is particularly rich and do very very well and never complains about money, we also gib "rm50" but show faces and if got afterparty and bachelor night, we tapao or at least try to tapao.
poor friend is getting married, poor friend is hardworking and not bad of a fellow, very good friend. knows he always has money problem due to maybe hospital bill for mother or father
but he is very rajin and doesnt do gambling or drink heavily or even main amoi, everyday go work come back cook at home one
we help him "secretly" also tapao angpao inside from rm1k, if he come up to us and even ask for loan, we BAGI aje if possible to show appreciation, confirm before wedding finish can see him crying due to appreciation.
*
and like any culture that over stays its welcome it should die, the concept can be noble, but theres nothing noble about a bride and groom who cant afford anything doing a grand wedding then getting stressed about money.

in simple terms, if one is stressed about cash, one has no reason to do the ceremony.

Giving face is a two way street, relatives coming to give you face is one thing, relatives/parents/guests demanding a grand wedding is another. They are not giving face to the host, infact its rude, like being served tea in someones home and go : "THIS ONE NOT PREMIUM NIPPON GREEN TEA? i dont drink filth"

we dont do this to to our bosses or clients even if they mistreat us and cheat us along the way.

likewise when our friends come, we should also give face, understand that they might not be in the best economic standing or that their believes might differ from us. We dont demand them to give face by forking out cash , after all, it is us that is calling for the wedding, they are our guests and in chinese culture or any asian culture, the guests should be treated well and with respect

In the olden days marriage was a much simpler affair, without a lot of the new "traditions" we seem to throw in this occasion without thought or measure. There were no wedding rings, no big venues, no fancy dress codes, couples need not ask RSVP months in advance to fit a "table quota" to match and pay for the thing.

Over the years we add more crap and more costs, everything be as expensive as possible. Its a once in a lifetime event says the marketers and the gullible buyers swallow it down like a hungry whores. All to a level where now, if there are no angpows, no one has any idea how to pay for dinner.

As you mentioned, the purpose in the old days was to provide aid to the newlywed, starting a family is expensive and finding a nest to roost more so. It is not to pay for a lavish wastage of wealth

At the core it is already rotten, hence why i disagree strongly to it, at this time and age where people are complaining about high costs, throwing money to the wind for a single day is very unwise. Then for a day suddenly we treat our friends and families worse than the people who mistreat us in our life.

TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 6 2018, 09:35 PM

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QUOTE(Zanei Gundan @ Feb 6 2018, 09:18 PM)
buat potluck ah senang

sendiri datang bawak lauk masing2

no issue angpow singit 10 ringit dah
*
no face like that
SUSahter
post Feb 6 2018, 09:41 PM

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be grateful ... bercukur
hirano
post Feb 6 2018, 09:44 PM

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QUOTE(kevin23 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:44 PM)
Very simple. U dont want pay, dont go.

U want to go, u give . Minimum RM100

Rm10 is a joke. My as well dont go
*
Lol. When u invite people for your wedding, might as well write big big on the invitation card "Ready angpau rm100 minimum or don't reply to the RSVP". Ok? Do it.

drowning
post Feb 6 2018, 10:37 PM

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QUOTE(digilife @ Feb 6 2018, 07:53 PM)
Not everyone have rich frens like you

We are just peasant , not 20k earners
*
No money do it cheap then. My fishing village friend, not the rich fisherman son,, do it buffet style only. Don't even tries to collect ang pow. People just give whatever they want. Don't even have name written on the ang pow.

What happened to just plain sharing your happy day with your friends and family?


Divou
post Feb 6 2018, 11:17 PM

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QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
*
Maybe those angpows were from not so close friends who didn't attend the dinner. Bersangka baik lah.
NielWooWoo1205
post Feb 6 2018, 11:26 PM

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QUOTE(v1n0d @ Feb 6 2018, 07:48 PM)
To be honest, you can’t be calculative about these things. What I like about the Chinese culture here is that there’s an understanding that when you attend a wedding dinner, your ang pow should be at “market value” depending on where the dinner is hosted and if alcohol is served.

Good luck getting anything close to that at Indian/Malay weddings. I’ve seen families with 5 kids come and sapu the food without even gifting a cent. At the end of the day, when we host a wedding dinner, it’s with the intention of sharing our special day with those invited. It’s their presence that matters. smile.gif
*
Deswai Malay wedding host will order extra about 1.5k pax of food. Invite 1k people but order food for 2.5k pax.
Tak habis then pack in small plastic bags give to neighbors
omnimech
post Feb 7 2018, 02:46 PM

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QUOTE(ozak @ Feb 6 2018, 12:58 PM)
Can decline to attend your farking dinner and don't need to pay ?
*
Why not ? The term is RSVP, not pay if you fuckin don't come.

I think cunts who expect people to pay after declining invitation should go burn in hell.


SUSKLboy92
post Feb 7 2018, 02:48 PM

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This again

If all his guests are loaded then yes there are 15 assholes in his party

But if there are some there who are poor then they probably only give what they can afford. This is common especially with poor elderly widows invited to wedding dinners
nickchk89
post Feb 7 2018, 02:49 PM

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QUOTE(Glockers @ Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM)
Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!
*
agree

its like not sincere want invite ppl eat, expect ppl pay it back, if like that dont invite me if u want me to pay my meal
adam_dkh
post Feb 7 2018, 02:52 PM

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Pay food you going to eat.... didt'n eat sendiri rugi, so eat as much as possible.
hteekay
post Feb 7 2018, 03:13 PM

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Don't just say it like Chinese only pay for Chinese wedding la..

I got invite for kenduri kahwin from my malay colleague I tapao angpow RM100 to them also. It's a sign of me trying to help ease the budget of the kenduri. ( kinda like people gotong royong help the kenduri ). It's cultural difference only.

But when pipul like TS go bitching about pipul give angpow RM10, this one if can I minta refund then pui on their face. This type of pipul don't earn my respect.
lin@lowyat
post Feb 7 2018, 03:35 PM

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QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
*
if you expect, guest that come give you angpao as the per pax dinner or more. dont invite.
you can ask them first via FB, oi i getting married your angpao more than RM100 or not? if not no need to come.
SUSNachiino Etamay
post Feb 7 2018, 03:41 PM

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lots of people butt hurt about DAP here

its a DAP wedding man. u come, you pay. you dont come or cant pay, ur BN.

This post has been edited by Nachiino Etamay: Feb 7 2018, 03:41 PM
klebestift
post Feb 7 2018, 04:19 PM

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so its like
RM10 = can't feel blessing
RM100 = can feel blessing
skylee18
post Feb 7 2018, 04:26 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
for me its simple, its either you give with sincerity amount or might as well don't give

things got quite simple, people that don't willing to give angpow or not willing to give certain amount of angpow can just pre-notify the bride that you are not able to attend due to "creative excuses" but yet when you committed into it and still so attached with the angpow then what for?

my emotion would not be that angry for seeing "Nothing given" to "RM10" angpow

its ridiculous and make no sense at all
TSCoup De Grace
post Feb 7 2018, 06:29 PM

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QUOTE(hteekay @ Feb 7 2018, 03:13 PM)
Don't just say it like Chinese only pay for Chinese wedding la..

I got invite for kenduri kahwin from my malay colleague I tapao angpow RM100 to them also. It's a sign of me trying to help ease the budget of the kenduri. ( kinda like people gotong royong help the kenduri ). It's cultural difference only.

But when pipul like TS go bitching about pipul give angpow RM10, this one if can I minta refund then pui on their face. This type of pipul don't earn my respect.
*
lol
runemastertan
post Feb 8 2018, 02:22 PM

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QUOTE(Lada Putih @ Feb 6 2018, 08:51 PM)
read my recent post above, i hope i could explain it better.
the "shit comes out from their mouth" i understand very much.
but to only gib rm10 is like calling the relationship you have with the host "very cheap"
anybody would be offended as if they only worth "rm10"
*
Let's put it this way.
There are 2 concepts on chinese wedding.

1. Just by showing up at the wedding, means the guest "give face" to the host
2. Host dont care you come or not, the most important thing is angpao must come.

Now, the first concept don't work anymore. Chinese now don;t really care. Most old people will look on face, but newer generation of chinese now demands money and face.

So, the more you give, the better your relationship to the host? Don't be naive. We are all human, and we are hypocrite. Relationship are not quantified by monetary, but rather emotion. And if just RM10 can cause the host to complain, you can expect that the host don;t even give a shit about the relationship with the guest.

And trust me, the host are hoping to earn as much as possible on the wedding to either pay back the money they owe due to how they spend on the wedding, or they plan to make a profit on this.

And yes, of course, we are not talking about rich people here. We are talking about middle class chinese.



Lolli07POP P
post Jun 18 2019, 12:12 PM

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I read all these replies here about bride and groom needing to see the economy, people's income and even blame on the groom or bride not choosing wisely.

First of all, Yes, if you are being invited through anymeans you are important. If you chose not to reply or go. it is your loss. Just so you know people have to plan who to invite and that alone takes effort. and even know your attitude unless you are a freaking plus one. so they might already know you will give rm 10.


2nd, what can you really buy nw at RM 10??? Yes even KFC & MCD cost more than 10. So figure out yourselves.

Furthermore.... people who are invited are definitely accounted for (income). please understand, and know this, all bride and groom expected to bear all cost even if guest dont pay. But you are important that is why you are invited.

And there are always those who asked to be invited and dont pay anything.(IS ACCOUNTED FOR)

So for those of you who said whatsapp, or snapchatt are not formal enough... then think again why should they invite someone who might even give rm 10 and then still expects a formal invitation and cards etc. IT IS A NO BRAINER. OMG.

Dear guests, all of you should know, they are kind enough to call you and bear all cost even if you dont pay. end of the day. i think they can rant a lil is not wrong.

After all there are still people who blame them. So... i truly hope no one treats you as how you mentioned here. Because you definitely did not respect the couple and yourself. Thank God this is a private non real account people can recognize you. if you so happen to be my friend, i will definitely not go to your wedding as well.

PS. RM 10...
aziratul
post Jun 18 2019, 12:18 PM

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QUOTE(Lolli07POP @ Jun 18 2019, 12:12 PM)
I read all these replies here about bride and groom needing to see the economy, people's income and even blame on the groom or bride not choosing wisely.

First of all, Yes, if you are being invited through anymeans you are important. If you chose not to reply or go. it is your loss. Just so you know people have to plan who to invite and that alone takes effort. and even know your attitude unless you are a freaking plus one. so they might already know you will give rm 10.
2nd, what can you really buy nw at RM 10??? Yes even KFC & MCD cost more than 10. So figure out yourselves.

Furthermore.... people who are invited are definitely accounted for (income). please understand, and know this, all bride and groom expected to bear all cost even if guest dont pay. But you are important that is why you are invited.

And there are always those who asked to be invited and dont pay anything.(IS ACCOUNTED FOR)

So for those of you who said whatsapp, or snapchatt are not formal enough... then think again why should they invite someone who might even give rm 10 and then still expects a formal invitation and cards etc. IT IS A NO BRAINER. OMG.

Dear guests, all of you should know, they are kind enough to call you and bear all cost even if you dont pay. end of the day. i think they can rant a lil is not wrong.

After all there are still people who blame them. So... i truly hope no one treats  you as how you mentioned here. Because you definitely did not respect the couple and yourself. Thank God this is a private non real account people can recognize you. if you so happen to be my friend, i will definitely not go to your wedding as well.

PS. RM 10...
*
Dah la register today

Lagi mau sembang kencang

Puikkkkk

Haram jadah
KazukiRae
post Jun 18 2019, 12:21 PM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:01 AM)
if they already calculative about stuff like this, they should not get married in the first place.
*
no money , dont merid rolleyes.gif
Docile
post Jun 18 2019, 12:22 PM

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U sendiri want to jemput the guest, the guest are not obligated to pay u to cover ur wedding expenses.

If you need others to cover your expenses, U shouldn't get married at all
pisces88
post Jun 18 2019, 12:23 PM

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Nowadays normal chinese restaurant rm1500 per table yo hahahha
Mixo Mania
post Jun 18 2019, 12:25 PM

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I hope more of this happen. Guest are not obliged to subsidise ur wedding dinner cost.
Docile
post Jun 18 2019, 12:25 PM

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QUOTE(hteekay @ Feb 7 2018, 03:13 PM)
Don't just say it like Chinese only pay for Chinese wedding la..

I got invite for kenduri kahwin from my malay colleague I tapao angpow RM100 to them also. It's a sign of me trying to help ease the budget of the kenduri. ( kinda like people gotong royong help the kenduri ). It's cultural difference only.

But when pipul like TS go bitching about pipul give angpow RM10, this one if can I minta refund then pui on their face. This type of pipul don't earn my respect.
*
U give people angpow is different case, i also do that when i attend wedding.

But i cannot digest people throw wedding party but expect guest to cover the expenses... niama even if u really expect also, keep it in heart la
Don't say that out.
It reflects who you really are.
SomaCruz89
post Jun 18 2019, 12:27 PM

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QUOTE(Glockers @ Feb 6 2018, 08:23 AM)
Kau bodoh nak mampos takde duit nak buat wedding dinner pergi kahwin dalam hutan la jempot monyet dengan babi hutan datang wedding kau. Bagi pisang.

Kau buat wedding dinner sebab nak celebrate wedding kau dengan close friends, family and relatives. Pastu kau expect monetory return dari wedding kau? Kau tak ikhlas lah tu bangsat!

Takde duit jangan buat wedding dinner lah bingai! Pergi register kahwin pastu pergi kerja macam biasa.

Cheapskate bodoh macam lembu punya orang!

Orang dah bagi duit pastu demand lebih plak! PUIIII!
*
Here comes the legendary basher.

Shot fired! Ini tembak pakai ak47?
homicidal85
post Jun 18 2019, 12:29 PM

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QUOTE(MarioKart @ Feb 6 2018, 08:02 AM)
Post their name and shame them in FB. Come eat RM  100+ per pax dinner. Ang Pao RM10.
*
all 15 were from the same person. total rm150.
Joey Christensen
post Jun 18 2019, 12:31 PM

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Honestly, I also feel ashamed giving RM300 only. Sad truth.
ze2
post Jun 18 2019, 12:34 PM

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A famous lawyer once told me, you are who you mixed with. If TS is a kiamsiap person, you have kiamsiap relatives and friends.
stopandroll
post Jun 18 2019, 12:35 PM

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Lain kali buat kenduri like malay. 1 kepala just RM20.
So they come with RM10 also didnt feel the sting.

Ini nak makan banyak2 serve in hotel with many courses mau tunjuk kaya.
But when got RM10 angpau sakit sebab already habis duit bayar for the show.

Bila marah kata budaya.
Adoi.
Lolli07POP P
post Jun 18 2019, 12:36 PM

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QUOTE(aziratul @ Jun 18 2019, 12:18 PM)
Dah la register today

Lagi mau sembang kencang

Puikkkkk

Haram jadah
*
Terasa ke? pasti lah arang tu you. hahahahahaha
aziratul
post Jun 18 2019, 12:39 PM

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QUOTE(Lolli07POP @ Jun 18 2019, 12:36 PM)
Terasa ke? pasti lah arang tu you. hahahahahaha
*
U lah yang terasa

Siap buat dupe bagai, i just mention the obvious thing here many /k agree with that ur sharing of info is stupid

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Buat dupe account just to reply to the tered

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LimauKering
post Jun 18 2019, 12:39 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
not acceptable at all.
party
post Jun 18 2019, 12:39 PM

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QUOTE(amxpayne67 @ Feb 6 2018, 08:05 AM)
when you get invited to someone's wedding, and is pretty close to the bride and/or bridesmaid, you are torn between your commitment as a friend, your financial situation, your own personal problems. It is not you to judge someone is cheapskate based on the angpao they give for your wedding.
*
I give 180 and eat 1 meal per day for entire month. Pray hrad that fren weddin is once in a lifetime only.

Dafuq who necro last year thread

This post has been edited by party: Jun 18 2019, 12:40 PM
Lolli07POP P
post Jun 18 2019, 12:41 PM

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QUOTE(stopandroll @ Jun 18 2019, 12:35 PM)
Lain kali buat kenduri like malay. 1 kepala just RM20.
So they come with RM10 also didnt feel the sting.

Ini nak makan banyak2 serve in hotel with many courses mau tunjuk kaya.
But when got RM10 angpau sakit sebab already habis duit bayar for the show.

Bila marah kata budaya.
Adoi.
*
My colleague wedding, malay, buat kenduri, he told me, relative bring 5 anak just give rm 10... how ah..? but you are right people should start doing kenduri. cheaper.
stopandroll
post Jun 18 2019, 12:43 PM

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QUOTE(Lolli07POP @ Jun 18 2019, 12:41 PM)
My colleague wedding, malay, buat kenduri, he told me, relative bring 5 anak just give rm 10... how ah..? but you are right people should start doing kenduri. cheaper.
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Kid makan sikit je. And the tradition say, we do kenduri to feed people, to announce wedding and let the village know that these 2 ppl already married.
So if 5 kids can enjoy themselves eating the kenduri food, let them. And we tapao summore door gift.
Lada Putih
post Jun 18 2019, 12:44 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
You want ppl to come
You want ppl give face
Ppl didn't no look up you
Or ppl think you're too rich enough
How much inside by tradition should not matter
Just like the angpau you receive during cny for any occasion
Ppl bagi you is beri you muka
You as the receiver has no rights to complain for receiving something for free even if it's 10 sen

If you really want receive big m9ney
Ask yourself what kind of a person you are first
If you are not a smart ass and generally a nice person ACCORDING to others, ppl will show their appreciation for you.

If you receive too little, then best ask yourself why kinda jibai face you are in everyday dealing with the society.

Jibai macam jibai kid crying foul for receiving Christmas present.
Lada Putih
post Jun 18 2019, 12:46 PM

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In short 你誰,給你醬多,幹琳啊
thxxht
post Jun 18 2019, 12:46 PM

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it's a bit cheapskate but this entitlement attitude/cultural is just wrong nowadays.
angelgemini
post Jun 18 2019, 12:47 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
this is the problem.
you force people to go ur wedding dinner by sending the invitation.
indirectly forcing people go see you happy and fashion show.

some family really in bad shape or financial problem.



United Rulez
post Jun 18 2019, 12:53 PM

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I think next time guest also should be calculative.
Take out calculator and check prices of each dish and also portion that they ate and calculate from there.
And then just throw the cash infront of them since they so desperate.
arinpresto
post Jun 18 2019, 12:55 PM

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Lesen p mana necro thread?
Level 60 Wizard
post Jun 18 2019, 12:59 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
ok la....the lowest i got was rm20....which i felt is ok also

wedding dinner is not to ask guests pay

in fact if they give me a card with blessing also very happy d..no money needed

seriously..gen nowadays..if cant afford wedding, kahwin holiday saja nod.gif
TSCoup De Grace
post Jun 18 2019, 06:08 PM

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QUOTE(Level 60 Wizard @ Jun 18 2019, 12:59 PM)
ok la....the lowest i got was rm20....which i felt is ok also

wedding dinner is not to ask guests pay

in fact if they give me a card with blessing also very happy d..no money needed

seriously..gen nowadays..if cant afford wedding, kahwin holiday saja nod.gif
*
yup..cannot b too calculative
ChasV
post Apr 30 2020, 02:15 PM

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I got invited to a wedding recently and I didnt go and here is why.
1) I have to know the couple. One of them would have been a good friend and he or she would have introduced the other at some point and so we know each other. They would say they were planning to marry (next month, next year, whatever).
2) The father, mother, etc can send the invitations but out of respect for the couple that invitation should be for people the couple really want to be there, not simply the fathers business acquaintances. Thats wrong and cruel. Its a special day for the COUPLE.
3) I refuse to go to any wedding where I dont know anyone including the couple because then you are only a party crasher which makes the couple feel very uncomfortable.

Well, 1-2-3 failed and so I didnt go. But receiving an invitation obligates a person whether you like it or not. If you RSVP, you have to go. Since I refused to go, I let them know immediately because they have to plan for how many people are going. I put RM88 in an envelope and wrote a 3-page hand-written letter about marriage and life, even though I didnt know the couple. I was sincere in doing so and I suppose also that nobody could say I gave RM5 and then I went there and ate RM200 of food. Not nice! So, in their mind they made a profit on me and can never say bad.

After this, I never heard from the family or the father who invited me. Its customary to send hand written cards to people who give wedding gifts. Nobody did. Ok, if not thank you at least acknowledge they got the envelope!

By the way, thank-you notes can go like this. Say its your wedding and you received a little flower pot.
"Dear Charles, we wanted to tell you how much we enjoyed receiving the pot. My wife loves the color. We're going to put it in our kitchen window so we can always see it and be reminded of how much we cherish our relationship with you. With love, Audrey and Hong." Send a nice little card even if you hated the pot and your wife straight threw it in the dustbin!

Gifts. It should be a gift, an object, not cash which is crass. In situations where you really dont know what they would like and ang pao is acceptable, then my rule is RM88 if you are going or not, and more if you know them well, like RM188 or more if you can afford it. If the couple is non-chinese, then lose the "8's" and send RM50-100 There is no way I would ever give RM10 even if I wasnt going. It means you dont care about the couple. If you know them and they know you are out of work, send RM20-30 and maybe dont go so that you wont be a drain on them, or go and partake lightly.

Myself, Im not a calculating person. When I marry, I want everyone to come and have a great time, NO GIFTS. Unfortunately, many people are calculating so dont ignore an invitation, take it seriously because its a small world, people remember, and you'll likely meet again. Regardless of what others do, make sure you always do the right thing. Its the best way to get through life.

Thats my own idea about this, everyone is different. Main thing, if you are going to make a mistake, do it in favor of the couple, not yourself. Its the biggest day of their life so far. Help them to have it.

This post has been edited by ChasV: Apr 30 2020, 02:41 PM
hksgmy
post Apr 30 2020, 02:21 PM

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QUOTE(ChasV @ Apr 30 2020, 02:15 PM)
I got invited to a wedding recently and I didnt go and here is why. I have requirements.
1) I have to know the couple. One of them would have been a good friend and he or she would have introduced the other at some point and we therefore know each other. They would say they were planning to marry (next month, next year, whatever).
2) The father, mother, etc can send the invitations but out of respect for the couple that invitation should be for people the couple really want to be there, not simply the fathers business acquaintances. Thats wrong and cruel. Its a special day for the COUPLE.
3) I refuse to go to any wedding where I dont know anyone including the couple because then you are only a party crasher which makes the couple feel very uncomfortable.

Well, 1-2-3 failed and so I didnt go. But receiving an invitation obligates a person whether you like it or not. If you RSVP, you have to go. Since I refused to go, I let them know immediately. I put RM88 in an envelope and wrote a 3-page hand-written letter about marriage and life, even though I didnt know the couple. I was sincere in doing so and I suppose also that nobody in this world could say I gave RM5 and then I went there and ate and drank RM200 of food. Thats cruel. So, in their mind they made a big profit on me and can never say bad.

After this, I never heard from the family or the father who invited me. Its customary to send hand written cards to people who give wedding gifts. Nobody did and then I felt bad that maybe they were unhappy with the gift. They didnt have to say thank you but at least acknowledge you got the envelope!

By the way, thank-you notes should go like this. Say you received a little flower pot.
"Dear Charles, we wanted to tell you how much we enjoyed receiving the pot. My wife loves the color. We're going to put it in our kitchen window so we can always see it and be reminded of how much we cherish our relationship with you. With love, Audrey and Hong."

Gifts. It should be a gift, an object, not cash which is crass. But in situations where you really dont know what they would like and ang pao is acceptable, then my rule is RM88 if you are going or not, and more if you know them well, like RM188 or more if you can afford it. There is no way I would ever give RM10 even if I wasnt going. Its insulting. It means you dont care about the couple. If you know them and they know you are out of work, send RM20-30 and maybe dont go so that you wont be a drain on them, or go and partake very lightly.

Myself, Im not a calculating person. When I marry, I want everyone to come and have a great time, NO GIFTS. Unfortunately, many people are calculating so dont ignore an invitation, take it seriously because its a small world, people remember, and you'll likely meet again. Regardless of what others do, make sure YOU always do the right thing. Its the best way to get through life.
*
Great advice!
deodorant
post Apr 30 2020, 02:21 PM

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Why the fugg this tered kena necro again
ohman
post Apr 30 2020, 02:23 PM

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I gave rm5 to foodpanda rider
Capt. Marble
post Apr 30 2020, 02:24 PM

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boarulez
post Apr 30 2020, 02:24 PM

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I even received empty angpao and 1 rm5 angpao , both no names, but thats ok because mine is within my budget , we did not overspent .
I remember my wife's friend wedding at singapore, told her friends how much they should give, lol like seriously????? u wana have wedding at expensive hotels then expect ur friends to pay certain amount. So shameful.
SUSthepark
post Apr 30 2020, 02:32 PM

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I tot its belanja people to celebrate with u. Not like people have to pay for ur celebration
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post Apr 30 2020, 02:35 PM

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QUOTE(Coup De Grace @ Feb 6 2018, 07:59 AM)
I just talked to my fren who had his chinese wedding reception last week

He told me they received 15 RM10 angpao from the guests during that night

What do u think about this? RM10 angpaos not acceptable?
*
nothing wrong with that.

TSCoup De Grace
post Apr 30 2020, 05:41 PM

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QUOTE(ChasV @ Apr 30 2020, 02:15 PM)
I got invited to a wedding recently and I didnt go and here is why.
1) I have to know the couple. One of them would have been a good friend and he or she would have introduced the other at some point and so we know each other. They would say they were planning to marry (next month, next year, whatever).
2) The father, mother, etc can send the invitations but out of respect for the couple that invitation should be for people the couple really want to be there, not simply the fathers business acquaintances. Thats wrong and cruel. Its a special day for the COUPLE.
3) I refuse to go to any wedding where I dont know anyone including the couple because then you are only a party crasher which makes the couple feel very uncomfortable.

Well, 1-2-3 failed and so I didnt go. But receiving an invitation obligates a person whether you like it or not. If you RSVP, you have to go. Since I refused to go, I let them know immediately because they have to plan for how many people are going. I put RM88 in an envelope and wrote a 3-page hand-written letter about marriage and life, even though I didnt know the couple. I was sincere in doing so and I suppose also that nobody could say I gave RM5 and then I went there and ate RM200 of food. Not nice! So, in their mind they made a profit on me and can never say bad.

After this, I never heard from the family or the father who invited me. Its customary to send hand written cards to people who give wedding gifts. Nobody did. Ok, if not thank you at least acknowledge they got the envelope!

By the way, thank-you notes can go like this. Say its your wedding and you received a little flower pot.
"Dear Charles, we wanted to tell you how much we enjoyed receiving the pot. My wife loves the color. We're going to put it in our kitchen window so we can always see it and be reminded of how much we cherish our relationship with you. With love, Audrey and Hong." Send a nice little card even if you hated the pot and your wife straight threw it in the dustbin!

Gifts. It should be a gift, an object, not cash which is crass. In situations where you really dont know what they would like and ang pao is acceptable, then my rule is RM88 if you are going or not, and more if you know them well, like RM188 or more if you can afford it. If the couple is non-chinese, then lose the "8's" and send RM50-100 There is no way I would ever give RM10 even if I wasnt going. It means you dont care about the couple. If you know them and they know you are out of work, send RM20-30 and maybe dont go so that you wont be a drain on them, or go and partake lightly.

Myself, Im not a calculating person. When I marry, I want everyone to come and have a great time, NO GIFTS. Unfortunately, many people are calculating so dont ignore an invitation, take it seriously because its a small world, people remember, and you'll likely meet again. Regardless of what others do, make sure you always do the right thing. Its the best way to get through life.

Thats my own idea about this, everyone is different. Main thing, if you are going to make a mistake, do it in favor of the couple, not yourself. Its the biggest day of their life so far. Help them to have it.
*
Hi necromancer
thxxht
post Apr 30 2020, 05:43 PM

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wtf necro thread

 

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