That's why I don't debate/discuss with you in the area of financial and account....lol...you talked about FIRE in other thread and I already knew you are well aware of these issues....
The lifestyle of wealthy boomer and successful Gen-X is hardly applicable to the normal folks nowadays. These girls are still dreaming to have a leng zai husband wearing suit to go out to work in the daytime and being a full time housewife taking care of children at home.

It's hard to find girls who can delay their gratification these days. Young people fail to appreciate the power of compounding...



This post has been edited by TOS: Jan 22 2024, 11:04 PM

There was one I saw. But sadly didn't like her profile that time. Now cannot find back her profile.

There's one I am talking to now. Work 75% in Singapore and come back regularly to Malaysia. She just hit 30. So she heard about FIRE and want to do FIRE but I don't think she will succeed as she keep asking me, will I travel until I am FAT FIRE. Told her straight no. Let's see if she sticks around. Some stuff she mentioned in the profile, work hard, play hard.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jan 22 2024, 07:41 PM

Damn where do you set your location in CMB

I set my location at KL with radius of 400 km so I cover whole West Malaysia + Singapore (and accidentally part of Indonesia).

I had to google ISTJ 😆

25 yo is still young...enjoy your 20s please. Thats one phase of life u wont get back when u hit your 30s and beyond.

And making money is important, but life is not just about money.

Same like sex..true that marriage is more than just sex. But sex is damn important (Unless u.think regularly fapping and cheong are what a successful marriage looks like).

All.the best in your hunting.

If you are brave can try those Thailand/Vietnam/Indonesian Chinese working in Singapore. They are better than China people. I think more wifey material.

My 20s is all about reaching millionaire in MYR by 30 and dating to prepare for marriage.

If I accidentally marry a gold digger and divorced then yea, my 20s' lifestyle is gonna repeat again...

Hard to explain to my family lah... let me try dating the Shanghai girl and see how things go. At least she's in SG and err doesn't look like a gold digger. In fact she told me you would hope you won't meet a gold digger...

1 mil in assets right? In this case, does housing under mortgage loan consider as asset or only consider as asset when the loan fully repaid?

I won't be buying a house until I get married/almost married under the fiance scheme from HDB.

I think by 30 I would be close to marriage and looking for houses seriously with my partner

The mortgage should be liability, the house is your asset. As you pay off your mortgage gradually, the asset side increases and the liability side decreases.

I haven't checked the terms and conditions for housing loans/mortgages in SG yet though. Will need to talk to my girl on that matter as well.

Sounds like my life Dating in 20s and repeat again 40s. 😆

I have relative in their 30s married and settled down well in SG with children some more. Not to say prosperous but a happy family. All the best in your future endeavour. Enough for me to spread negativity. Wanna look at the bright side of singleness in the midst of seeking my partner.....

This post has been edited by justapawn: Jan 23 2024, 01:50 PM

The fiance scheme in this context required one of the partner to be SG citizenship or both PR also can?

https://www.hdb.gov.sg/residential/buying-a...es-and-families

Under the HDB Fiancee Scheme, one of them must be Singaporean and the other can be PR or Sporean.

For new HDB flats and Prime location resale flats, if I am a PR I will need to pay 10k SGD to the SG government as "compensation" which can be clawed back with a grant when I become a Sporean in the future.

Both new flats and Prime resale flats are subject to income cap of 14k SGD a month, which I will likely exceed if I work at a hedge fund after my PhD...

Next up the rank is executive condo, EC in short. That one has similar citizenship requirement but no more claw-back grants from the SG government (they only subsidize the land price). Income cap 16k SGD a month... If my Shanghai girl still works probably our combined income will exceed this limit as well... So,

One level above is the condominium... No subsidies at all from SG government... Super expensive... But the quality is probably the best, got private pool, gym, BBQ pit etc.

There is another level above condo, it's called landed property, like bungalows and good class bungalows (GCBs) but uhm unless you have significant contribution to SG and a Sporean, you won't get to buy one. And it's super super expensive. One GCB can fetch 20-50 million SGD depending on location.

This post has been edited by TOS: Jan 24 2024, 11:40 AM

Good sharing, will save this for future references. I didn't know only locals are eligible to buy their bungalows.

Heyo, been wanting to reply to this but couldn't find the time to write my essay until now.

Women is generally quite aware of the "time limit". Here's how the single women in my circle of friends generally think:
A) I really want kids, so I need to settle down asap
B) I'd love to have a romantic partner, so I try my best to look for one. (This was me and a friend of mine. I'm WIP but she's kinda on hiatus cuz she just found it difficult to warm up to strangers...)
C) I'd like to have a romantic partner but I don't want to force/rush it, and I can't be bothered to actively look for one... (Many friends are here; they're quite skeptical about datings apps)
D) I'm aware I can be hard to deal with, so I willfully stay single (ironically speaking, this person is quite amicable and quiet. Just that she's a clean freak and she's really conscious about her own quirk..)
A and B people would be those you're probably lamenting about. Basically as time passes, they gain experience and also desperation at the same time. You may perceive that as only the latter, but I can assure you, there's so much more about it.

Heck, don't you dare tell me you never changed from 20s to 30s. You probably learned a lot from your life experiences, saved up a good sum, groomed yourself better, gained a bit of weight from your skinny self, whatever it is, some part(s) of you must've gotten better. Sometimes gotta give yourself some credits lah.

Furthermore, when I said experience, I meant that understanding oneself is also a way to realise what one truly wants or doesn't want. I said this before and I still stand by it: we can imagine our ideal partner all we want, but reality can be very different and that's not a bad thing. You will NEVER find the perfect one. I do not believe in a perfect jigsaw puzzle pair -- at least not from the get go. Sure, having deal breakers allow you to quickly filter out certain people, and that helps in this modern era of excessive choices (dating apps), but remember that on the flip side, you're closing your own doors to other opportunities with each additional criterion. It's equally important to keep an open mind that when you meet someone so different and out of your own world, you might just realise that maybe those little quirks are what you love and suddenly you don't care as much about her height or weight anymore. After the initial chemistry, it's still a hell lot of work to mold yourselves to be the best version for the other, and that includes accepting each others' occasional bullshits. Don't forget you're not perfect either.

Hi, how to approach type D girl? She told me that theres no chemistry because of her personality as she takes very long time to bond with people. We went out twice before but after that she's always busy with work, or something came up after we set the date. So I always can't get to ask her out. She felt guilty for wasting my time and energy, told me that I deserved someone better. I felt like I bother her too much but according to her, i'm not a burden to her but it's due to her own personality problem, so she said it's better to just be friends. But then she told me that she's happy to get my msgs. She would just go with the flow, 顺其自然.... I feel she's not sure and not really rejecting relationship.

Hi, sorry but I cannot help you. One of my friends also told me similar feelings when she tried dating apps and gave up after a few encounters, she described some to me...:
No romantic feeling.
Just happy to go out as friends but it's weird because there's the expectation to become romantic partners, she feels pressured
The more the guy tried (to hang out with her), the scarier it became for her, because she feared disappointing the guy who's being nice to her.
Well, I'm just speaking for my friend but... Yeah, she has minimal experience with relationships but a really easygoing person, I also feel sad for her no bf lahh aih. My friend already gave up and went overseas to try something new career wise... Lol.

Now back to you, it depends on both sides:
You
How much do you like her?
How long are you willing to wait?
You may choose to tell her your "conditions" but I personally would keep it to myself to let the relationship develop naturally, and if she still doesn't feel more after your time limit, it's time to let go.
Unfortunately, we cannot force the other person so if they're not ready, you need to think about your own future.

Her
Any red flags? I'm concerned that some women may string along a guy for free meals and rides, so you need to protect yourself. It's a very good sign she pays for some of your outings.
What is her impression of you? Well, in Asian culture, the true answer is likely not spoken so perhaps you can look for her body language - does it feel like she's receptive? Any hidden snide remarks about you e.g. "oh you have 10k savings only ah ......." If she's dissatisfied with something about you, those doubts may hinder development of romantic feelings. (Btw, try not to disclose your financial position early on, unless you want to attract gold diggers)
Is she a nice person to be with even as friends? So at least you get to enjoy the time with each other even if it doesn't work out in the end. It wouldn't be healthy if it feels like a chore to stick around... Perhaps learn something about women on general for your next attempt.

Looks like a lot people using tinder and tantan, but did anyone use sugarbook? I got saw this apps but not sure is it same like tinder, anyone got use before can give some advise?

its either
a) you're not very attractive based on previous guys she hung out with
b) she has avoidant personality that can be due to many factors

obviously she didn't make you as priority thats why refer to (a), she maybe only appear avoidant to you but she can also hooking up with some guys behind your vision (you never know). If a girl still reply you but no further actions just continue see other girls no hard feelings. If she find out you have other things going on on Instagram, she might start get curious again

the paid ones can be scammy ie donate "gifts" to the broadcaster so that you can get further "benefits"