There's nothing wrong with it per se, if you understand why those moral values exists, and choose to stick by them, its cool

The problem I see is that people are repressing an essential part of them, and that leads to improperly developed individuals.

Well probably you have yet to enter (so i believe or recall from my historical text book) the age of discovery, there's no harm in one thinking that the world is still squarish in nature but whether one has progress beyond that stage where chasity belts, sticking heads on pikes and the mere sight of fire is considered witch craft.

My boundary is bendable both ways, i can flex mine beyond the limits of tradition to the liberal extreme but what about yours? ITs only the ideas that r harden and ingrained in a person that it becomes a foundation that they r so fearful to test those boundaries, have u felt the temptation and the lust of another? To speak as oneself being holier than thou is a hypocracy since one has yet to fully understood the nature of such guilty pleasures.

So in reference to the topic i tell the TS, go forth and seek ye the pleasures of life!

On the contrary society has progressed (refering to Hawks statement, sleeping from tree to tree has already existed before the dawn of the century) for centuries even with the existence of such liberal behaviour, its only now that we enter the 21st century that the true freedom has been endowned upon this very generation.

For one, I'm glad that not everyone are acting out their repressed feelings (lust) and letting themselves go. It's because society have no or low values now, that people don't believe in marriages anymore, not when divorce is so convenient. Why should people go through the hassles of maintaining relationships when they can easily get what they want or need without any commitment? It's like emotional and physical shopping, really, American style. Don't like what u've bought? Money back!

On the contrary, we r discussing on an issue that goes beyond just moral values which r limiting the potential of human growth that one can truly experience life's pleasures.

It doesnt necessarily mean that we totally disregard moral but its merely plays a tiny part in the equation of decision making, like Darklight79 said he was once fallen into the guilty pleasures in life and now his back on his foot... Isn't it a great example of liberalism to the extreme of both tradition and liberalism?

I don't know about u, but I'm clear on what I want and don't want in my life. I don't feel the need or desire to test those boundaries, because, what is there to prove? Like I mentioned in my earlier post, I enjoy the arguments on this thread. To know what people are actually thinking in relation to this topic. U may have ur own stance/belief/whatever in life. Doesn't mean that everyone thinks the way u do, or that "conventional thinking" should be damned to hell just because U don't give a shit about it.

The point I've been trying to get across to you seems to be lost. Repressing feelings is not a good thing, you must learn to control them, and to control them, you must accept what these feelings are. The more you repress, the worse it gets as time goes on. A lot of cases of cheating happen due to such repression, then when they can't take it anymore, it explodes... and they take a ride on the downward spiral roller coaster!

Its not easy to get what you want AND need, that's what a partner is for. As darklight has mentioned, casual sex is fun at first, but its unfulfilling, its missing the emotional component that is important, and that you only get from a partner. Finding such a partner is not easy, maintaining someone like that isn't easy either.

The problem is, currently, people get together with someone else, and repress themselves because they think "its not right", but they really want to. So what they show is a facade, its fake. So the relationship starts out on a false pretence, its stupid. People need to stop pretending, and for people to stop pretending, society needs to be less judgemental.

Likewise i enjoy the company of learned people, not to argue but to seek mutual acceptance of an idea. Notwithstanding the fact one may reject or refuse to accept it, it is entirely of course acceptable to me since I shall not be the one who lit the fuse of revolution or coup de tat overnight in a person who digress or contrary to my opinons.

There's nothing to be proved or gained in a forum merely (probably) dented pride unless you wanted to challenge me to a duel of russian rouleutte the sacrifice would prolly be eithe of our lives. A forum is a place where intellects gather to contribute ideas (whether frivilous in nature or the gospel truth remains to be tested).

This post has been edited by aurora97: Dec 10 2008, 05:18 PM

Acting out on those feelings and controlling them, are two very different things. If a person doesn't act out on his feelings, then he is repressing them. It doesn't change the fact that the feeling is still there. If society is less judgmental, what would people do? People can't just do what they want, that's a fact. They still need certain boundaries. Some can be challenged, but some, unethical. Case in point, fetishes for paedophilic activities. And while it's unhealthy for a person to keep their feelings repressed to the point of explosion, they need to differentiate. Accept that it's their problem and get help. From their partners or people they trust. It's too bad I'm not able to express myself well sometimes.

sex without feelings just sex
sex with feelings called making out

i told this many times already, guys can fall in love when having sex and not after the ordeal, the word is lust

it will corrupt you from inside slowly, as you don't need to go through the process of dating which is essential for every relationship, and it will eventually affect his/her current relationship =P

If put it shortly : do they KNOW what they are doing ? -- if translated into Cantonese, d effect of this question = better ..

If answer = yes, then good luck; take d responsibility n consequences, pls.

If answer = ...ehm... not sure or gotta think for a while b4 answer back, then good luck as well; blur ppl living a blur life ...

Every action comes with responsibility n consequences; to ourselves, to others.

Dumbo
Is there anything need to ask??
Just go for it. Have fun with it.
You are a loser if reject it.

Careful. =) In that case, you shouldn't be so patronizing. I don't think you know me well enough to describe me as having "squarish" perceptions. The experiences you so crave for are not as blissful as you think they are.

I won't do it.

What on earth are these girls thinking? Sleeping around when they have partners, why get attached in the first place?

that's the nature of men

Going by your logic we would have countless amounts of perverts/rapists, psychopaths and murderers.

Rules/Laws and morale values are meant so society doesn't degrade itself and turn utterly chaotic, in a world without boundaries lawlessness abounds. Cheers.

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Added on December 12, 2008, 3:06 amI do agree, men are more inclined towards a degree of unfaithfulness, it's a man ego thing whereby the amount of girls slept with equates to how macho or great he is. But for girls it's sleep with more than 1 guy and you're a slut, wait you don't even have to sleep just flirt and you're branded a slut.

There's a certain degree of unfairness with regards to this but i agree on one thing, infidelity shouldn't be tolerated irregardless of which gender one belongs too.

This post has been edited by Tak3shi: Dec 12 2008, 03:08 AM

obviously... not only a slut, a hooker.. wait, are they the same?

No sane girl will ever accept that her bf used to go around the block (By that I mean casual or solicited sex). If you have a choice, never kiss and tell It will come up in arguments, she'll remember it like an elephant does, and you'll find it hard to live it down.....

So, the bottomline for guys is, never tell (of course, better yet never do it). Deny it vehemently for the sake of your marriage. Girls when they're so in love with you during the initial phase, once you've both settled into a comfortable r'ship she'll start picking out your character flaws with a toothpick one by one. And believe you me, sexual indiscretions rank amongst the highest deal breakers of any r'ship.

I have a live example, a little twisted but a real story nonetheless. I've got a friend whose wifey cheated on him for a year. Eventually he found out and he told her point blank to either stop it or gtfo. She stopped it, but now everytime he's working late he has to call home and tell her every little detail of where he is, who he's with etc. Even the sound of any girl's voice in the background will make her suspicious, and he has to spend time explaining that she's a colleague or whatever. Poor guy. She did the nasty, he's paying for it. I guess he really loves her and his kid but that's another story

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Added on December 12, 2008, 4:06 amNo, they're not the same. A hooker's smarter, she gets paid for it....lol

Here's a little joke: What's the difference between a slut and a b****? A slut sleeps with everyone. A b**** sleeps with everyone but you.....

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Added on December 12, 2008, 4:18 amLOL. That may be true, but the fact that in small towns where practically everyone knows everybody, it's quite hard to engage in liscentious activities without running the risk of getting caught, so one probability of lesser immorality in smaller towns could be this. However if you happen to know the town gossip you'd prolly find out there's actually quite a bit of dirt underneath every little rock you look.

This post has been edited by gregy: Dec 12 2008, 04:18 AM

that wasnt intended to be a compliment or criticism it doesnt equate to patronizing, likewise i was being mischievous to an extent playful with my comments. If u take it to the extent that I am partonizing you, that is certainly not the very case.

I treat everyone on forum as my peers nothing lesser or nothing more than that.

Furthermore, I have found my comments deleted without any reasoning of satisfactory justification by moderator.

This post has been edited by aurora97: Dec 12 2008, 09:26 AM

Hi folks,

i sincerely thank everyone for contributing but i'm closing the tread.

It seems that everyone is getting wayyyyyy too emotional and personal. That's the last thing i was hoping, anyways.

well, thanks again.