This question all in a sudden pop up in my mind. Coz i know someday i will be someone's wife. How to make my future hubby happy with me coz i'm working office lady from 9am to 5pm (mon & fri) & 9am-1pm(sat). Sometime i will be working longer then i need to work due to work load heavy. Don't expect me to cook after work as i will be home very late. I don't do household as i'm leaving with my mummy. She will do everything for me. I dunno how to cook & clean and i don't like either. Please advice...

look for rich man .......to get u a maid

buy more j-av and watch....
dont demand and expect.....


This post has been edited by JamesPond: Dec 21 2007, 11:59 AM

Most important thing, is to love your husband and be faithful. That's the most important thing. Everything else is secondary. If you do not have those, everything else will fall apart. And once you have those, you'll find out how to best be a good wife to your husband. =D

thn if u got marry...u still live with your mummy meh
dn't know do household....somehow gotta learn as well
but if you're very lucky(pray alot)..u might be married to a guy that does all the household for u and maybe the cooking(cooking dn't hope so much)
and u wanna make him happy....please him more...dn't make him angry and stressup all the time...flirt with him...he'll do some for u!!!

of coz i will love him and will be faithful to him.. but somehow i think a women who dunno how to cook & clean is not 100% perfect in a marriage. Even my current guy knows better then me... as he used to cook and clean the household and even he is bz with his own biz.

from some ppl's angle (mostly chinese)...cannot cook and clean is not perfect in marriage...yes
but it's u 2 are open minded man...and your man understand u...that won't be a matter
thn learn at least how to clean from your current man...........cook maybe he'll do it for u!!...haha
try him!

This post has been edited by MR_alien: Dec 21 2007, 12:05 PM

I try my best to please him.. but somehow due to stress from works & traffic we end up we argue on simple things...

u married?

I'm still single

I agree that love is important. I would like to add another which is the understanding from both parties. Your future husband has to know and understand that you don't like to do certain things like cleaning. Since both of you are working, I guess there won't be an issue to hire a maid to do the cleaning for you.

All issues can be settled. It just requires both party to communicate and understand each other's needs.

try think home is home ..work is work...when is working think like work....but when reach home..think of what he has done for u at HOME today!!...this may help u
and arguing on simple thing is bad for your realtionship as well...try to aviod that....either u stop or he stop when start arguing

then dont get headache.........

The very first quality that you need to have is the cooking skill. I wanted to become a successful housewife too. Am currently learning how to cook. So far I can only cook the simple dishes. I'm still single, maybe no one will get to taste my cooking

This post has been edited by wintermelon: Dec 21 2007, 12:46 PM

If man can cook and clean better than girls what will left for girls ? getting pregenant ?

yeah ...maybe it's that...cuz that's the one that only man cannot do...
but very pity that many girls now dn't like to get pregnant....
haizzzz....no more next generation!!!

just get urself a viet bridegroom they will do the household work.

QUOTED FOR THE TRUTH!!!



THE FACT IS.... most guys today know how to do household chores better than girls. You know why? Because of how namby pamby some girls are today..... cannot do this, cannot do that and so the guys have to prepare for survival

1. Get a maid
2. Learn
3. Tolerate
4. Take turns

I find this question a bit saddening as it reinforces the stereotypes of what a man and woman's roles are.

This seems to imply that guys like girls that stay in the home and cook nice food etc etc...Well sure I like it but is it a requirement? Not for me at least.

Be comfortable with who you are, learn how to cook a few simple dishes and it's not a problem to get your other half to join in as well. Cooking need not be a chore and everyone can help out. You cook, he washes or vice versa.

The old model of MAN MAKE MONEY COME HOME WIFE MUST SERVE should be obsolete now.

If your husband or husband to be enforces that...then perhaps what he needs is a maid and not a wife.

But once again I think EVERYONE should be able to do a bit of house work regardless of being male or female. It's part of being a complete person.

in fact i probably should learn how to operate that washing machine of mine....

learn how to operate that washing machine of yours...which means u never used it be4??

so that doesn't make you a housewife in the first place.

watch desperate housewives, season 1 - season 4.
Then you'll know.

Means i have not used this particular one b4

me too... i can cook..lol

lolx!!....


This post has been edited by MR_alien: Dec 21 2007, 05:58 PM

you don't really know what's happening don't you ?, guys can cook is no longer a specialty its has become like a demand, and i do believe that guy cook just to impress thier gf, not for thier own good where they can cook for their friends and families, it's all becuase women keep saying cooking is the way to capture a women's heart, at the end of the day this "flower heart" guy who can cooks have two gf

i suggest u better learn now ..or else u will put the burden to your family; besides; you rely too much on your mom; sooner later she will gone forever ..so u better learn while u still got her ..
tats my advice
and also...u got to learn how to manage family stuff together..u got 2 feeling to juggle..kids and hubby...so it is not easy...better learn also
besides; a mature and strong management is important..corp woman not easy ..honestly.



This post has been edited by KVReninem: Dec 21 2007, 07:02 PM

Easiest thing to do is move out and learn to be independent.

Ask your future bf or husband to do that too.

Why? Because you guys / girls will learn that it takes a lot of effort to live on your own.

2nd most of the stuff where you think a 'proper' woman should do or a 'proper' man should do will not come in mind.

Because in the end both of you would have to contribute some housework.

Especially when you start having kids.

If you can't even take care of yourself, please don't try to raise a kid.

Marriage or relationship isn't a contract nor a agreement, IT IS A PARTNERSHIP, if either of you screw up that means both your lads screwed up.

Capish?

I am willing to quit my job to take care of my future hubby

If you cannot cook and clean then what good are you at home? Unless you find a very rich husband can get one or two maids for you and also don't mind about u cant cook and clean then is okay but i bet he gonna get bore with you after several years of marriage then go look for other girls..

p/s: i have a friend whos gf also can't cook and clean, they haven't marry yet but staying together for couple of years and my friend alrd started to wonder wether or not she is the right girl for him and show some signs of regret liao.. ..but infront of his gf he will do anything(cleaning house, cook for her and including taking off her shoes when she comes back home frm work ) for her but behind her he complained like hell.

This post has been edited by fevercrash: Dec 24 2007, 09:19 AM

well it depends how gorgeous you're, woman are normally rated by thier looks n body. If you look like jolin then no problem, infact no need to work and no need to do house work and your husband would still be trill just having you around.

If you look otherwise then "Chap sang"

haha yeah truly agree, i forgot to add that!

honestly, i don't mind my wife being either a housewife, or being a 'lui keong yan'. if both of us wants to work, then we'll just get a maid. if either one of us can earn a good living for the whole family, then one can stay home and spend time with the kids. i dun even mind being the house husband for that matter, '24 hao lou dau'.

anwyays TS. when you asked how to become a good housewife, which means you don't have a job outside and ur at home 24/7. if you have a 9-5 job then i don't think you can be considered as a housewife.

For my thinking, I dun mind my gf not cooking or housewife or anything. As long as she love me and I love her. Most important is she can tolerate with me and have some sex when we are free or I might needed.

I use to cook for my gf few times, and I'm happy with it. I use to take care of my gf, clean her room, fix her pc, fold and keep her cloth, cook for her, wash the plate and bowl sometimes, pamper her, help her carry stuff, and lots more.

lol how long can you do all those things for her? a year, 2 years ......forever???

How long u need sex? Then it is how long u do... lulz

u are desperate

thn you're a good husband!!!

Let things come naturally.. Each couple has their priority in life.. Understand each other is the most important , then learn from there... Understand to adapt each other.. He may know how to cook and house work, I'm sure you are good in other ways.. Try to please him in other ways like doing things he doesn't know how to do.

Alright .. Cheers

better still - LEARN! if he's good, he can teach you too.

being a good wife is not what you get immediately upon marriage. you're just a human, you learn and improve.

learning by doing..

practice makes perfect..

so get married first

you don't have to get married first before learning la!

aiyoh by then you're losing out a lot of precious time. even before marriage you can learn how to be a good wife already.

I think we as women should learn to do house chores. As we will be the ones managing the kitchen and cleanliness of the home as well as nurturing our babies to be good people.

We cannot be so irresponsible as to say "I dont know how to handle household and chores because I am living with my mom." Sorry to say such person stating the above do not have rights and maturity to be people's wife yet.

Great sex cure all!!!

Great sex wont help if you have plates and bowls pile up in the kitchen sink.
Great sex wont help if you have dirty floor tiles
Great sex wont help if you have a smelly toilet that's stuck

Why is it that men always think sex is everything when it is not? Please learn to help out with the house chores because for a single girl to handle a home is very difficult, much more difficult if she has to work.

I agree with this one....its not about being chouvanistic, its a mans instinct, coz this is how we grade a woman.

There is a hidden agenda of reproduction, we look at a womans body and tits, she looks sexy with nice curve without realizing that good curve means good chance or healthy to carry babys, big tits also means good to breast feeding. Good looks...pretty. All this indicate good gene to pass down to our children.

Then the character, do house work, cook...these are the ability to take care and groom our children.

This is how mans instinct thinks...

that's the right spirit. even when staying with mother, there's plenty of opportunity to learn and help out.

dropping by ...

chores can always be *mainly* settled by hired hands. but its important to do them as a sense of discipline, and a life skill rather than to please anyone. start with ur own room.

hired hands are a luxury. some more have to prepare room for them if they're staying. plenty of other worries. why spend on them when you can do it yourself?

nowadays got the RM50 for 2 hours , its handy to clear off some pending stuff like big laundry and all, not referring to the fulltime live-in type. ppls also worry about live-in maid and its potential probrems

OK, chores are mainly handled by hired hands but that provided you have the money. Even though their wages are somewhat little, I feel we need to do our part as well. If it's a maid who does gardening, laundry, sweeping and mopping, I guess that's understandable but there are some things very minor that even we skip some times and that is so wrong, and especially wrong when you speak of being a newlywed housewife.

Girls often have hair drop, who's going to clean it up? Naturally, a human loses about 100 strands of hair each day, on the bed, in the shower, etc. Like this wait for hired-hands?

You drink a cup of plain water and leave the cup at the sink? What about taking out the garbage? In the west, taking out the garbage is usually the man's job!

Marriage and being a housewife is not easy. Living together, are you going to have that conventional "LIFT THE TOILET SEAT UP!" fight? I hope not.

This post has been edited by WiNdGa|: Dec 26 2007, 10:45 PM

LEARN is what i can say

SACRIFICES had to be made

seriously, all u need to do is loving him with all ur heart....

Yes, all we need is a loving heart and we will actually feel glad when we do something for them. For one, I dont really do house chores, I dont like them and dust makes me sneeze and feel uncomfy for hours.

But today, I helped my BF cleaned his room, it was really dusty but we wipe every single item there is in the room and then throw away many rubbish. Now everything feels so clean and I know he is very happy about it because I rarely help with cleaning. Cooking, washing, sewing is OK. Cleaning is a little bit difficult for me but gotta learn, to impress the in-laws.

I can cook but can't do house chores oso... the flying dust only makes me sneeze through out the day and might end up with running nose

My bf living alone in his condo(he's fr out station), whereas I'm a local PJ gal. What I can say is I'm lucky to have him to be more independent than me. What we were planning is after married, those easy house chores such as washing, ironing we'll do ourselves. And leave heavy chores like mopping, cleaning up toilets to hired hands(those RM50/2h), even twice a mth will only cost RM100, I think it's affordable for most of us.

I'm not so convenience with live-in maid, too many prob occurs. Will not consider this before having any children...

greybear:those sneezing prob i face it to..thus making more point for me to clean d house.
i like cleaning like evrythin' shall be fungi and bacteria free. But now,i'm a bit messy person...drawings evrywhere...no time to tidy up..too busy with dateline...solution:dont move away things that often.
my rule of thumb here:floor should always be clean,toilet shiny clean,dont eat at home if u lazy to do dishes la!!..haha..

good wife to me means u hav to take care of husband needs-sex,clothing,food..ect....but take care of urself too!!be good to his families n friends, n always watch ur etiquette n behaviour at all time n place such that it wont bring shame 2 ur beloved hubby(all done with love)

i think before moving in the house together, need to discuss what he's willing to help out in the house (cut the grass? change the lights? take out heavy laundry?) and what you're willing to do (iron clothes? cook and wash?). if he expects you to do all the house chores, then you should discuss it before moving in. vice versa i know this uncle purposely wake up at 5am to do house chores AND cook breakfast for his wife and kids... it doesn't mean she's a bad house wife also, just that her hubby wants to do it for her ma.

more importantly, u need to talk about it! don't even joke about it because it involves each other's time and effort.

that way after you actually marry and move in together, the expectations will be the same.

anyway i'm too young to get married so perhaps this is just an idealistic opinion from a small kid

learn and improve.that is the basic requirement.u wiling to learn.every1 is learning everyday.include a newly wed couple.learn how to share,how to build a great home.gambateh

Good newly wed housewife? Try acting as a goody goody wife at the begining, you will get his expectation up during the early days and turned into a bad oldly wed housewife.

If you can't do housework then either you hire (temp or perm) or take turns and learn. Be honest before you guys take the plunge.

Love, support and understanding be it that you work 9 - 5 or 5 - 9 or not working at all.



Love each other as they are

Support each other be it burden or happiness

Understanding that no one is equal and perfect.

This post has been edited by sexyamber: Mar 5 2008, 03:30 PM

What kinda love and support are you talking about?

Love your husband as he is in terms of his merits and flaws as a person.

Give the support that your husband needs be it for achievement or failure in life.

Hope this is clear enough

The definition of a good wife is very vague because different husband want different things. Egoistic husband want wife to listen to him all the time. Independent husband wish wife to be independent too. Insecured man, wishes wife to be by his side 24/7.

So there is really no such thing as a GOOD WIFE for everyone. Depends on the expectations and whether you can meet it or not.

caring enough ...always available when family has any problems ...try to bring lotsa joy into the family ...share the sadness n happiness ...be tolerate ...put em as ur priority

start practicing now la .. ask your mummy teach you how to cook .... ur working alsready .. why u want to be "house " wife ?.. be working wife la ...

Buy something nice to eat to home.

u r ryte!!! hrm.even me myself not really gud in cooking. spent almost 6 years live in hostel [cuz my skewl is a boarding school] makes me feel like -i know nothing- bout all housework. my mom n sis teached me all dat [cook especially] but then when get back to hostel n not practce cooking summore when got so many homeworks to do during holiday had reduced d number how many times i cook. then, forgot what ive learned before. n currently continue studying at university....i cme backhome during semester break oni, da whole semester didnt prctce cooking. haih2.

IMHO no matter how highly educated a women is -she has to know how to cook-at least some simple dishes. -and the facts that so many girls out there still doesn't know how to cook coz they are staying with parents and has got maid who do everything for them.

In the end of the day i think once in a while you husband would want to test his wife's cooking.

and i think it's quite true -mat salleh are more open and don't demand so much , unlike their Asian counterpart, and worst still Asian's Mother in Law

my mom always says the secret to a man is thru his stomach...

but the mistress mom taught her differently la, and I think her moms formula is more superior

yea must know how to cook ...after a tired day at work back home must drink some nice soup... if not ill go other place drink soup...

no worry...myself working mom 9-5 sat 9-1 sometimes reach home 9pm...
i dunno cook n dont do hse work coz i had before 2 maid...after i married ..i dun have maid .... i'm not marry a rich man...but a understanding man.. he do all the hse work even cook for me n wash our clothes .... and lipat then keep well in wardrobe ... i used to live like princess before i got marry... even now i got no maid no bungalow no driver i still live like a princess in my husband heart... .... so girls...dun force urself to learn cook or go classes ... learn to love urself... if a man love u he'll accept u like wat u are...

sorry for my english.... i'm not educated person....

i think 1st thing 1st must know how to cook

NO worries. Eventually you will able to do whatever that you cant do before after you married to your loves one. I know gals that was a princess before married, but now just like untie which so good in cooking & do marketing at pasar...

sooner or later your hubby will get tired and drink soup at mistress home...serious...

i am not married but regards to cooking.i hated cooking baking was done because i love it.....
then one of maid went back so alot of household work to do now its chores spilt among all take turns to cook. i do twice a week.1st it was a burden as i need to plan ahead and study the recipe n needed a helping hand.slowly it became more easy i can even plan dinner over any ingredients in the fridge...i found out its not that i hated cooking its just that i felt helpless cause i dont know how to cook well.my bf would love to drop by anytime after work or even after his sessions just to try my cooking:) makes the bonding stronger

be a full time housewife then your husband will be happy =)

Well, I guess that's depends on what your husband want right?

I'm currently working from 8am - 6pm, sometimes got to bring a lot of paper work home to do, monthly will be participating in charity event but I think it should be alright, don't think that I want to change current situation even after I'm married unless I have my own children. Anyhow, I don't know am I weird or what, I love chores. I just enjoy doing chores and love cooking too. Even sometimes back home at 7pm, I will still enjoy rush to the kitchen to cook some dishes. As for house chores, I'm used to it to wake up earlier in the morning to get it done before off to work, so at night can spend some time for my work.

I think it's all depends on how both communicate. It's not to say must know how to do chores or cooking then will be a very good wife, sometimes it depends on both needs

how to become newly housewife , well , that easy , i ask my wife to explain ..

whatever she said or do, u avoid, then u will be a good newly housewife

This post has been edited by limshenghong: Jul 20 2009, 01:41 AM

When I first stay in with my hubby b4 married, I can only cook very basic stuff, dun know how to make soup or steam fish, sweet sour crabs and stuff, my MIL taught me a lot of recipe, she will say this and that is my hubbys favorite and I slowly I learn to cook, and now ok edi. So not much to worry about, you can always learn later.

This post has been edited by moorish: May 4 2009, 09:50 PM

good women = stays in the kitchen

Your Husband Is Lucky, Cuz Sm Girls Totally Have No Interests Even After Marriage...

However I Dont Agree With GodOfDota That "Good Women=Stays in Da Kitchen"
Now Into Millenium, Many Girls Are Career Women, No Time To Cook Even Knowing How...
But Purely Housewife, At Least She Must Know Lil Bit...
It Would Just Be a Bonus If a Girl Posseses Simple Culinary Skills, Cuz It's Rare.
But Doesnt Mean Stays In Da Kitchen Would Be A Good Wife...

This post has been edited by limshenghong: Jul 20 2009, 01:42 AM

ppl like him will wish to get a gf, thats why they say such thing, proves they dun hv any

my bf would be afraid everytime i go for cooking class.cause i like to perfect the recipe i learn and try many times.jsut yesterday my mum groan afraid ill try the strawberry cheesecake again cause fedup lol

Well, I think it doesn't always necessary be the woman who only cooks. Think of it this way. Sometimes, both the husband and wife can cook together. At the same time, it cultivates a healthier relationship as both parties can have a better chance of communicating with each other, while both demonstrates their best skills. (The guy can deal with more heavy duty stuffs, gal can deal with creativity, or vice versa).

Arloooo...

At the end of the day , A Wife still need to learn to cook la, sometimes a wife cooking make your husband feel satisfy, make a home feel like a home

i learning cooking from Petronas ( Mrs wong kitchen )


Click & learn
http://www.mymesra.com.my/index.php?ch=lpg...ipes&by=mrswong

I have very interest in cleaning up the house, but not into cooking. Recently I'm planing to settle down my life and my bf just came to me timely.

Last day I made tuna sandwiches for him but he was not free to come to my house and take it. The next day, he asked to finish it

This post has been edited by debbieyss: May 7 2009, 11:09 PM

dear cute ginos83.

financial planning is a must as well as good and thorough communication.
1) u need to share financial burden with him, eg 1/3 of the expenses or 50% if u r willing to.

2) u must get a maid/part time maid/any elders in either family to look after the houseworks and kids. Dont ever let chores/kids/MIL issues disturb your marriage, cos IT WILL and it will be destructive. Be careful.

3) enjoy the marriage, enjoy the 2's world, find quiet private quality time,

4) same equally goes to your kids and MIL/mother who helps u, therefore u r going to be a very busy lady who have a perfect life.

good luck

i kinda have the same problem with TS a years ago.. i'm the only child.. my family is very protective.. i don't need to do housework at all! not even folding my own clothes..

when i was with my ex bf, i did cook.. i actually started liking to cook.. the feeling of waiting for him to come back home after work n eat my home cook food, makes me happy.. after we broke up, i decided not to love anymore.. i wanted to work hard and not depend on anyone..

then i met my husband before i even got myself a new job.. we got married and a year ago, we just moved into our new condo.. previously i stayed with my mum.. so, a year ago was my 1st time ever operating a washing machine! yea, i was 27 =.=

since my husband is working, i took my role as a housewife.. because i love my husband so much, i love the feeling of being a housewife.. to clean the house, pay the bills, cook and etc.. i always make sure the house is clean and comfortable for him.. i'm starting to cook alot too coz i want to cook for the one i love my husband did ask me to learn to cook previously coz he said i need to cook for our future kids.. can't rely on a maid or anyone..

in a way by being a housewife, it's taking care of your husband coz he doesn't need to worry about the bills, food and etc..

now, it's my full time job as a housewife.. i don't have a maid to help me and we're staying in a duplex condo.. like a 2 storey semi D.. all i'm saying is that once u're married, u'd want to do things for your loved ones.. it comes naturally.. i used to hate doing housework but look, i'm a housewife now.. seeing the house clean and tidy puts a smile to my face.. sometimes i spend 6 hours cleaning the entire house.. hehehe..

i fetch my gf.. i clean the bathroom.. i sweep.. i cook.. i never complain.. my gf ever say she saw me cleaning the house and pity about me.. wanna hire a maid.. i told her..i dont mind doing all these stuff.. why dont u just hire me.. until i cannot tahan already i will use those money to hire a maid.. lolx

Interests will start to build as priorities in your life changes.

so sweeet!~~

my husband is quite generous.... he sort of understand that i am tired after a long day at work...lazy to do household chores...
so i make thursday as my 'cleaning day' lo...

but sometimes it's quite irritating that you do things he dont like, and he do things that you dont like..

sometimes both have to compromise... and act as sweet as possible in front your husband...

cos man doesnt like a black face ....

you have to voice out your displeasure at the right time...

But not all at one time...

Staying together sure got fight one...See how you sweetened the situation only

Dear Cute Nichole

Your sharing remind me of the young me, a submissive wife. I hope there wont be such a day that u wake up like me, realizing u r being submissive and lost urself. Although you have every reason to do what u r doing right now that u love him, or u ve no other better job to do, or u r doing for future kids, or... I just hope u r truly happy bfore too late.

I'm a newly housewife too and i considered myself lucky as my hubby works in oversea and we enjoy most of the expats benefit such as having nice accomodation, cleaner will come and do the house chore every once a week and so on..so basically i don't need to worry on the cleaning part. What i need is to focus on my cooking skill..satisfaction comes when i see his smile after finishing up all my cookings...