I have a contradictory point here since I am a divorcee 3 years ago so I know.

Some girls like the "challenge" of trying to get other women's husband. Not to say she is entirely that kind of girl but they exist. Once you totally exit a marriage, they see you as a failed person in relationships. Why? Because they assume that you did not do your part well enough to maintain a marriage. On the other hand, if a married man who is struggling with his wife, he still is in a marriage and has better chance to hit on other girls.

Yes and No for this. On this, she knew the whole reason and story behind my divorce. Yes - she might somehow feel insecure to build a a deeper relationship with me. I'm totally aware of this.

Or it could either be you turned out too needy after your divorce?

Maybe before the stop text was sent - the casual chats and hang outs would make her felt so, hence she built her inner defense wall i guess.

yeah, noticed that also.
as long as it's good for the person, no harm in doing so.

Sitting down, deep talk and speak "inner truth".

Sorry..this is not how to score with a girl.

I think she is just using you as a service provider.

Did u confess to her?
Most probably take u for granted, treat u as a spare during her freetime and enjoy all those free lunch/dinner from u.

You are are cleared that she gave you a rejection. But after awhile she still going out with you. This is bullshit, most probably take you for granted for dinner, kill her time, as driver.




If i were you, focus back yourself. Keep your options open, meeting more new ladies. As for her part, please move on.

This post has been edited by Mr.Ballz: Jul 1 2025, 06:56 PM

ChatGPT said:
Thank you for sharing that. Your honesty shows a lot of self-awareness, and I can see you're trying to find clarity and peace after something emotionally confusing. Let’s break this down piece by piece:

🔄 The Mixed Signals
You're describing a cycle that many people experience:

Getting close → Rejection → Reconnection → Avoidance → Confusion

This kind of push-pull behavior is emotionally exhausting, especially when the signals don’t match the words. It leaves you constantly second-guessing what’s real.

🛬 Picking Her Up from the Airport
You asked: Would someone who doesn't like you do that?

Here’s the hard truth:
Yes, some people will accept care and help even if they don’t feel romantically toward the person offering it. Not necessarily out of manipulation—sometimes it's comfort, habit, or even guilt. Some don’t know how to draw clear boundaries themselves, and that confusion gets passed on to you.

📵 The “Stop-Text” That Was Ignored
You clearly took the initiative to set a boundary. That's strong. But when she acted like it never happened, it likely invalidated your emotional effort and left you off-balance.

If she was emotionally mature, she should have acknowledged that message and asked if reconnecting was okay.

The fact that she didn't may mean:

She doesn't know what she wants

She enjoys the emotional closeness without commitment

Or she isn’t respecting your boundaries

❌ Avoidant Behavior
You described her as becoming avoidant. That often means someone is emotionally overwhelmed or doesn't want to deal with discomfort. Avoidant people may pull close for emotional security, then push away when intimacy gets real.

In other words: She may want the closeness without the cost.

💬 My View
You're not crazy or weak for being confused. Mixed signals are powerful because they exploit hope—hope that things are meaningful, that feelings are mutual, or that it might just work out.

But here’s the key:

If you’re constantly decoding someone’s behavior, they’re not showing up clearly.

Clarity is kindness. Mixed signals, whether intentional or not, are a form of emotional unavailability.

🙌 Moving On
You're already doing the right thing—meeting new people, focusing on forward movement. That lingering feeling? That’s just your heart catching up to what your mind already knows.

You don’t have to hate her. But you owe it to yourself to stop investing in someone who isn’t showing up fully.

If you want, I can help you:

Draft a final closure message

Reflect on what to look for next time

Or just be here to listen

Either way, I respect where you’re at. You're not alone in this.

No F*ckin way, how many of your male friends is single ? Can you imagine telling their gf/wife that they are fetching their "close" female friend lolz


Yes, they do exist but not for the same motives/reasons. Don't believe me? try tell them you are romantically interested in them.

There is almost no benefits for a guy to be good/close friend with a woman. It benefits women more than men. Only few exception like fwb.

Dey punde what big time divorce? You were option

The bitch test drive then feel u pondan bapuk ghey no upgrade status and no good piap so she will progress to alpha for her. You show the bitch what she missing.

Exercise. Self development meditate be good but don't be pushover pondan faggot

Exactly that damn woman is bitch using u. Don't waste your time with her. The bitch feel guilty she using u though she know she will never let u bang her.

Bro Zone is for desperate faggot. Like Russell Peter say be a Man do the right thing.

This post has been edited by lordgamer3: Jul 1 2025, 10:42 PM

I did not confess to her. Let me clarify some thing here:

1) The airport pickup - She rejected my offer to pick her at first, only after my few attempts, only she agreed.
2) Casual meet up - She is not that kind of person where I ask her out, she would instantly agreed. Normally i need to ask few times only after couple of days, only we meet. All the bills we are on AA only.

I admit the act i did above may be a bit needy at times, and so i do slow things down and give her space by not contacting and pursuing her.

So i do not think she is taking me for granted as she set her boundaries pretty clear.

This post has been edited by pkn_jet: Jul 2 2025, 11:19 AM

You are too narrow minded.

I have a number of good/close female friends.

In terms of benefits, its pretty similar to having a good/close male friend. Good friends will go a bit out of the way to help you out.

Life is better with good friends in this world, regardless of sex.

Hey bro, long time no see. How you doing?

Anyway, there are benefits to being good friends with a woman. They have a different perspectives and approach than guys. Its often easier to explore problems/emotions with women compared to men.

my 2cents is youre the insurance and ego booster that any women would want and need in their life and most prob shes just not that into you
youre safe and available to her and thats about it, would it evolve into something greater maybe if there isnt any one else on her trail.
best bet is to continue your search and not focus your intention and attention to her.
youre single now thus enjoy the pain and the fun thats come with it why got stuck with some lame fling.

A bit needy? That's too needy

It's not narrow minded, it's reality. I'm not talking about exceptions but in general.

No matter how progressive we are, we will always revert back to our instinct.

Give me few good examples of good/close female friend is equivalent to a male friend.

I'm doing great, still much more to learn about life. How bout you? Did you get what you wish for in life?

We can get perspectives from female acquaintances doesn't need to be "close" friend, being close require extra effort and getting less in return. In another term a waste of time and resources. Here's the irony, the more I ignore them trying getting close to me, the more they are interested. If only these beta males know these unspoken wisdom.

If I wanted to explore my problem/emotions let it be my gf/wife. Or better yet in the bed 😆. Ain't got no time for these spoiled brats.

This post has been edited by nickisthemost: Jul 2 2025, 04:48 PM

Pretty much Life always throws curve balls, but overall I'm happy with what I have

You're still looking at them as partner potential, rather than friend, that's why you think that way. If you graduate from that thinking, you'll notice you won't be talking about your friendships in such a transactional way.

You won't get good perspectives from acquittances because they don't really know you, so anything said to you would be generic crap. There are also some things you can't talk to your wife about, at least not right away without building up to it. Which is why therapist and counsellors exist. Friends can often take those roles whether male/female.

I'm glad you're still here. Ok, quick recap who do you miss the most? Gotta be me rite ? rite ? 😂

@PIOPIO i miss you 😘

It got nothing to do with seeing them as potential partner. Oh we will never graduate from having fun lolz.

No shot. Female acquaintances that I know will give me good perspectives not because of how close we are, but generally because they are just good people. Plus, getting a good female perspective is already a low bar in terms of benefits.

Therapists/counsellors are trained—they are not the same.