1. I leave it to the readers to analyse themselves. My writing style is more to argumentative type, i.e. consider 2 different views from extreme ends.

2. Some people can be naturally humble, but not me. It's difficult for me to fake it, and I don't believe in false humility that's prevalent in Asian cultures. I'm more to the high-profile type, outspoken and naturally bold. Depends on how you see it, some people admire my confidence/being outspoken while some people see it as conceit/bragging. But one thing holds true: I don't insult people and trample on them to achieve what I want.

Again, please consider the context here: We're in a forum, fully word-based. I need to give background information, lots of info is missing coz we all don't know each other in real life, so we are unable to judge a person based on other cues, e.g. body language and voice tone. In real life, it'll be easier/fairer to judge whether a person is a braggart or not.

3. Tell me when is real war gonna happen. If it's unlikely, then each person has his/her own battles to go through, with some battles tougher than the other. If those who had tough times came to different conclusions, feel free to share their own perspectives.

There is war all the time.  You just fail to consider it, like many others that your post is targeted to. There are wars in other countries, and there are so much lessons can be learned from there.  My wife is from one of those countries, you can check back at my previous posts.  I have also interacted a lot with survivors of war, and I can easily say whatever you or I have been through pales in comparison with whatever that they have undergone.  Not even close.

4. 'Girls are only after money' is partially true. I'd put it this way: women want financial security, and financial security is part of ensuring basic needs are met first, and only then the needs from the higher levels can be met later. Even if a woman marries a poor guy, she'll want him to be rich one day (or at least, can provide a life of comfort, if luxury is out of reach). It's not just for her, but for the family.

I didn't disagree with you.  It is precisely because the maxim has been tried and tested and still holds true till now.  But this is a general statement. There are people out there, more than you think, that do not value material wealth as much as many of us here believe. It's hard to find them in Malaysia, easier overseas. And ultimately, it is all a spectrum.  Extremities only exists in the domain of naive thoughts.


5. I agree with the part "borderline cunning". Well, this can be used for good or bad. Anything that is an opinion/ adjective, is always subjective to individual interpretation and depends on the context. If you use it the bad way, then it's cunning. If you use it the good way, then it's strategic. I don't use my intellect to frame/con people, so labelling me as cunning is a bit unfair, isn't it?

Cunning or not, depends on perspective. Based on your way of thinking projected from your posts, I would wager there has been quite many instances where you actions would have been labelled as cunning by some, and at the same time, brilliant by others.  You thrive in the grey zone, hence my label of 'borderline cunning' is justified.


6. You're talking in terms of after marriage. My context is before marriage, during dating phase, where finances are separated between partners. You feel secure now, or maybe she gives you the assurance before marriage, hence you don't do either.

She never gave me any assurances in monetary terms. My situation applies to before and after marriage. Even today, our finances are still separate, but I still support her.  In fact, when we started dating, her income is lower than mine.  But when the opportunity for the huge jump came along and she hesitated, it was me who encouraged her to take it up.  Even though I know she will eclipse my income significantly, it is better for her. In a relationship, it is about giving.  I learned this from her.

In terms of feeling threatened, I do admit that I'm one of the few outliers who are very secure by nature.  So that may help, but more importantly, I have role models which I can see that it is actually ok for the women to earn more as long as the man is not too far behind and is always trying. Heck, the family is so much happier and more stable than rich man being the sole bread-winner type.


Lastly, why do I take this route? Simple. I don't have the patience to wait for a man to build up his wealth from scratch. When a man is a few years older than me, and when I was taking years of youth to build my own wealth, what was he doing? Why should I wait for a man in his 30s to build his wealth when I myself, in my 20s, have built mine? Don't you think there's incompatibility issues here, in terms of level of ambition, intellect and capability?

Hahahahahahahahahahaha. Intellect and capability?  Don't be so fast to judge.  Just because someone is not there today does not mean that he/she is not capable.  I have experienced this first hand, and the experience is what I would describe as 'humbling'. You may be intelligent, but you're very judgmental and stubborn. There are many different perspectives which you believe is wrong or did not consider before, but may very well hold true in the other perspective. Someone who is not rich may be just biding time, waiting for the right opportunity. Luck plays a big role too. 

So yes, there may be incompatibility issues, but only because you made it so.  When I dated my wife, I thought she was just a normal girl, and her way of thinking is really weird and will not get her far.  But I must say, I was wrong.  She operates in a different environment where her style actually thrives. I learn from it, and even though I have a big ego, I was wise enough to humble myself, and learn that what I know is only true due to circumstances of my surroundings.

& why I aim for material success? Coz without bread and butter, your whatever ideals and morals are BS. If you had suffered poverty before to the point you wanna commit suicide, you wouldn't be thinking of morals and ideals, or "we". That's the last thing you would think of, in fact.

I used to think and still believe ideals is a luxury.  But I am not as cocky as you to discount the opposing view that everyone can afford to have ideals.  Even the most down-trodden of all, those who has been through times of genocide and have seen crimes against humanity, still hold onto ideals.  So what the f*ck makes you and me qualify to say that ideals and morals are BS?  Learn some REAL humility.

Btw, what do you expect, me marrying a plain ordinary man? I can't. Firstly, he'll get intimated and overwhelmed by my ambition and goals. Secondly, I need someone who is equally strong and supportive, in terms of personal character, abilities and finances, to be able to handle the challenges that come along. Thirdly, by going far and beyond in life, do you think plain ordinary men would want this? Most of them may just want a quiet & simple life, but that's not the life I want.

You choose your own life.  Intimidated or not depends on both parties.  I would not even consider women like you even if I come from a rich family (I don't).  Your view of Malaysian men is generally correct, most are timid and ball-less, yada, yada.  Many posts in this forum exemplifies that. I don't think marrying a rich man is something extraordinary.  Good yes, but nothing to shout about.  Marrying someone with great potential, and walk the path with him and help him achieve greatness; now that's something.

FYI, my fiance and I have been interviewed by the media a few times. Our names & pics appeared in websites of FMT, The Malaysian Insider, The Star & BFM, to date. Just last week, I was interviewed by local film-making crew; took 2 hours. That's the type of life I am living.

I didn't know you're a public figure, nor do I care.  Public figures have a different life than ordinary people, and most of their marriages are not smooth sailing (I'm being tactful here, but you get the meaning).  From a human to another, I wish you luck.

So, if you think there are average income-earners who enjoy media exposure and dare to speak up in public, or establish biz, media and political connections, feel free to introduce to me so that I can have a different POV. Otherwise, based on my years of meeting men and making observations, this is how I currently think.
No I don't know anyone, and I personally don't either. Your life is certainly skewed due to your line of work. Media attracts a certain group of people, so I can see why you're the way you are.

Again, being one-sided as usual. You really enjoy labelling people, and once you have your mind fixed on seeing a person as "bad" (based on your interpretation), then whatever the person says or does, will always be bad.

CONTEXT. You always fail to read with context.

& hello, I didn't read with "malicious intent" so that I can carry out my "malpractice". FYI, I scored A in Sejarah (SPM), scored A in Pengajian Am (STPM) and took Malaysian Politics as my elective subject though I was an English major. & I taught biz communication skills and biz writing, to undergraduates and working adults. It's my interest and expertise, dude. I'm not doing it for men, though being able to chat with them on these is a plus point.

One thing that irritates me a lot is YOU ALWAYS MAKE ASSUMPTIONS and then personally attack me. CHILDISH AND IMMATURE.

In terms of looks, I have spent nearly RM50k in the past few years on various skincare treatments to look beautiful, such as going for facials, mani/pedicure, hair treatments (rebonding, colouring), doing my eyebrows, lips, skin hair removal & polishing, body massages etc. Yeah, I look naturally pretty without any makeup; no need to edit photos too. With makeup, I look way more gorgeous. (Yeah, spent so much $$$, will of coz look fabulous.)

On a side note, a woman being able to spend RM10k a year on beauty enhancements without getting bankrupt or in bad debt is a sign of high earning power & prudent financial management. Men find rich/high-earning women attractive too, so be one. (Yeah, easier said than done, but can be done.)

So yeah, I spent lots of time reading books, esp. biz, finance, investments etc ("dry & boring" for most women), so that I know what to chat with them, and impress them.

Hard work does pay off.

The outcome? Attracted many high-earning professionals, and went on dates with them. (Birds of a feather flock together  wink.gif)

5) K, eldest son of a rich biz family, studied in the U.K. Inherited family wealth, earning 5-digit SGD a month. We're engaged now. Our anniversary trip this year is to Phuket, pre-wedding photoshoot will be in Taiwan, and the reception + honeymoon (destination wedding) will be in Maldives ← he suggested these countries.

Yes, my goals involve my own money. My plans are ... well, I don't think it's right to share here in public space, but I've been incubating them for years, so now beginning to execute.

Not 5-digits. Just 3-digit SGD. I'll pay him back if he requests, coz it's not a loan, and we're engaged. Don't you guys give your wife/fiancee/ gf some pocket money? Maybe not all men do this, but some men do. It's not unusual okay.

Well, I do record what he has given to me. I'm the type of person who pays my bills, PTPTN and credit cards in full every month; very good paymaster. If he ever has financial difficulty, then it'll be my turn to help him out, but I think he'll be too proud to ask money back from me. So what I'll do is: set a UT fund aside for him or use it for our kids next time.

***

I think the biggest difference between me and other gold-diggers, is that:

1) I don't actively pursue rich men although I put in the efforts to attract them subtly. It's up to them whether to get interested or not, not that I can force them to like me, right? Not that type. I don't have any specific targets like most gold diggers do.

2) I don't sleep around; stayed a V till age 27-- my choice, wanna save it for future husband. Yeah, I'm not in the flesh trade or used my body to lure them. I was skinny and had acne skin before, ok. That's why I spent so much $ to enhance my looks.

3) If I were a gold digger, as mentioned earlier in Post #13, "Btw, those men didn't pursue me simultaneously; so I rejected one by one over the years, without knowing who's next for me. If I were after their money, I would have accepted the first man when he first pursued me, coz after all, why would I wait for the unknown/uncertainty?"

Hopefully the above clarifies your doubts.

Guys a winner mindset does not necessarily need to acquire wealth and there are fine woman looking for average income man with qualities they desire. TS's mindset doesn't represents the mind set of many wonderful ladies.

Taiwan. So hard to explain to them, since ts make a good argument, I just let them read and judge la. 

I think there already enough TS has spoken of her personality. if any one really backtrack all her post, one probably can deduce TS in real life.

I think it her sharing her views, and those can take or not take her experiences

There are decent ladies out there; you obviously found yours
Taiwanese girls are more feminine and obedient la, why bother with Msian bossy and materialistic girls
Share ler wei, I'm really curious but not hardworking enough. Just a link to one of the interviews is good enough

What an interesting thread that garnered 6 pages from last night. Good to hear that the relationship dept is working well

Just wanted to say to TS, I'm a tad bit dissapointed that you couldn't survive SG working culture. Surely such a confident and highly competent Msian could shine in Singapore corporate world 

TS knows what she want, she have her own 'feel-good' factor. Most important she think what she did right, that's about it. But it is all for herself.

I actually do hope that ppl don't take it seriously as everyone have their own personality and hopefully guys don't generalize all ladies have similar character.

I don't marry rich guy, but an ordinary guy with no family inheritance, yet we need to bear our parents' expenses. We don't plan big for future and never have planning when we were younger. But now at 40, we have done pay for a landed property, and another 1 coming up. We drive decent car, with my son happily growing up. We went Malacca for our honeymoon at age near 30. But for the last decade, Phuket is our annual trip as my son wanted to practice his sea-swim. Annual vacation to overseas (no need to mention place) is a norm, as we are fond for winter holidays. All this are not hard to achieve, we just take 1 step at a time being ppl of under employment. I did lost my job before, but soon enough back on normal track. We don't need to marry rich, as long as we found someone who can walk hand-in-hand, thru good and bad... everything will be in order.

As my son is the only child in both family (all our siblings are old-single), and he is expected to inherit quite a fat amount from them. I actually hope he won't bump into such an ambitious gal like TS. A simple, obedient girl will be a better candidate as DIL.

And I want to stress that, we (include siblings) are ppl under employment, not professional. And I can say both myself and hubby are not ambitious and we are not risk taker at all. Our income is common figure and may consider low for our age if compare to some ppl. But we still live comfortable life, all based on taking 1 step at a time.

If having acne = poor gene, then what? >85% young Malaysians have defective genes? 

Many feel intimidated by your writing I guess. It seemed you know what you want, you work for it with discipline and you got it. Such a strong lady may not be everyone cup of tea. But for those that does not feel intimidated by you or inferior to you, then you would be a great friend and partner. Also is your online persona congruent with what you are in real life ? I can't imagine such an argumentative writer doing things like learning to cook, dancing etc just to pleased / attract a man.

And on your article, I don't think all rich men like the type of women you describe above. What is your take on personality that are rich in net worth but act and live very modestly with very low profile partner ? Based on your experience, are those people consider "rich", and what kind of ideal partner are they looking for in your opinion ?

Because you never experienced hardcore poor like TS

People who had never starved before will not appreciate the precious of food, for instance

Being raised under extremely unfavorable environment can really drive a person to the extreme end.

3) Would you date or marry someone who isn't rich? I think that would give us and yourself a clearer perspective

Fourthly, if you're dating a guy who is earning an average income, please develop his potential and push him to success. Your aspiration, dreams and energy level can fuel his ambition to give you the life both of you want -- enjoy comfort without worry, and perhaps, a life of luxury one day.
...

Lastly, love a man not for his money, but for his personality, his character, dreams and ambitions, and earning potential. The truly rich man is one who can lose everything, smile and start all over again, and earn the same pot of gold in a decade or two. Now that is what I call true wealth. thumbsup.gif

Share ler wei, I'm really curious but not hardworking enough. Just a link to one of the interviews is good enough

What an interesting thread that garnered 6 pages from last night. Good to hear that the relationship dept is working well

Just wanted to say to TS, I'm a tad bit dissapointed that you couldn't survive SG working culture. Surely such a confident and highly competent Msian could shine in Singapore corporate world 

Substantiate your allegation that I have I labelled you or labelled you wrongly. Else, you are the one personally attacking me. Apology not compulsory.

Those are not assumption. Those are in ur very own writing. From the title and the quotes below.

You hv a target/victim (rich men,HIM), you have your methods (bait the victim,HIM) and finally finishing of with the kill (the list of rewards of your kill, HIM).
You checked all that in your text.

How do you have the audacity to say you are not doing it for men? Maybe not all men, that you are right. But rich men (it's in the title by the way before you accuse me anything).      ?

Try detached urself from ur writing and go through this list. Ask urself honestly how many redflags u checked.
https://www.wikihow.com/Spot-a-Gold-Digger

It's shallow and hollow. Shouldn't be encouraged.
Focus on betterman/woman is good. Banging rich tycoon is secondary. But it appears you got it the other way round and refused to admit it.

Melinda Gates story is inspiring. But for some reason, people are more interested in donating to Kylie Jenner.

Substantiate your allegation that I have I labelled you or labelled you wrongly. Else, you are the one personally attacking me. Apology not compulsory.

Those are not assumption. Those are in ur very own writing. From the title and the quotes below.

You hv a target/victim (rich men,HIM), you have your methods (bait the victim,HIM) and finally finishing of with the kill (the list of rewards of your kill, HIM).
You checked all that in your text.

How do you have the audacity to say you are not doing it for men? Maybe not all men, that you are right. But rich men (it's in the title by the way before you accuse me anything).      ?

Try detached urself from ur writing and go through this list. Ask urself honestly how many redflags u checked.
https://www.wikihow.com/Spot-a-Gold-Digger

It's shallow and hollow. Shouldn't be encouraged.
Focus on betterman/woman is good. Banging rich tycoon is secondary. But it appears you got it the other way round and refused to admit it.

Melinda Gates story is inspiring. But for some reason, people are more interested in donating to Kylie Jenner.

Well, I don't want my identity to be exposed yet. But I do have the links; valid, not made up story.

Again, don't make assumption without asking why I quit my job.

FYI, I was headhunted to work in SG, but eventually I fired my boss. I wasn't happy with how things were done in the dept, employee turnover was 40% within 6 months, so I chaired a meeting as the dept representative, & presented to the senior director, director, 2 managers and supervisor in the conference room. The company hoped I'd stay to help out, I said no. Left with a farewell party, presents and card.

Full story in this thread: Working in Singapore V20

See, this is the problem with you guys: always straightaway jump to conclusions, because of your past experiences or whatever failures/ rejections you faced with other "gold-digging" materialistic women. You end up so paranoid and sarcastic, labelling all women as the same bitchy type.

Read carefully again. Did I pursue those men? I didn't. They approached me. & They happened to be of that category. They told me about their background, not like I hunted for them.  I'm not a sugar baby either. Jeez. With their wealth and status, you think they won't know how to differentiate between a gold digger and a real gem?

If you read my previous thread, I don't pursue men; said that many times already. Go study more about the law of attraction.

My statement was meant to mess with you, sounds like you took the bait 

I've been dealing with Singaporeans and took it out on you, no offense please. The truth is their working culture can be really messed up and so what if we can't survive their style? Msians are into short cuts or finding the best way to do something, we question way too much to their liking