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 How to Marry a Rich Man, for ladies

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titanmelvin
post Jul 19 2018, 11:57 AM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 18 2018, 07:03 PM)
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Sounds like your only way/plan of becoming rich is to marry a rich guy. Unless you haven't shared about your plans to get rich on your OWN abilities.

I don't think a hardworking or determined person would stop working for 1-2 years. Furthermore, you seem to be living expensively off your fiance's money. You implied that you had 'high earning power & prudent financial management', but you don't have any savings to support yourself?

Your whole topic revolves around money, money, rich, rich.
titanmelvin
post Jul 19 2018, 12:34 PM

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QUOTE(josefin @ Jul 19 2018, 12:16 PM)
wah..wht were the interviews all about?
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I doubt the interview was about her...
titanmelvin
post Jul 19 2018, 01:28 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 19 2018, 12:28 PM)
Again, see, didn't read my other posts. I can't be putting everything into the first post, can I? That would be too long.

Read Post#17, in which I wrote: "Just last night, I was sleepless, as I was planning my life up to age 40. I have many goals to achieve in life, so I plan from year 2018 to 2027 (10 years). I'm a highly future-oriented person, very practical and strong in executing plans and goals."

What these plans are, well, biz plans, including CSR. I emailed him about it. As for my savings, it's used for other purposes; he knows where it goes to. Otherwise, he'd have complained long ago, thinking that I'm leeching him.
Well, you could just share again on your plans to make money with your own abilities. While you're at it, please share which stage are you on your goals. Does your goals involve only your own money?

How much do you take from your fiance every month? 5 digits? Do you have the intention to pay him back?

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titanmelvin
post Jul 19 2018, 03:24 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 19 2018, 01:52 PM)
Yes, my goals involve my own money. My plans are ... well, I don't think it's right to share here in public space, but I've been incubating them for years, so now beginning to execute.

Not 5-digits. Just 3-digit SGD. I'll pay him back if he requests, coz it's not a loan, and we're engaged. Don't you guys give your wife/fiancee/ gf some pocket money? Maybe not all men do this, but some men do. It's not unusual okay.

Well, I do record what he has given to me. I'm the type of person who pays my bills, PTPTN and credit cards in full every month; very good paymaster. If he ever has financial difficulty, then it'll be my turn to help him out, but I think he'll be too proud to ask money back from me. So what I'll do is: set a UT fund aside for him or use it for our kids next time.

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I think the biggest difference between me and other gold-diggers, is that:

1) I don't actively pursue rich men although I put in the efforts to attract them subtly. It's up to them whether to get interested or not, not that I can force them to like me, right? Not that type. I don't have any specific targets like most gold diggers do.

2) I don't sleep around; stayed a V till age 27-- my choice, wanna save it for future husband. Yeah, I'm not in the flesh trade or used my body to lure them. I was skinny and had acne skin before, ok. That's why I spent so much $ to enhance my looks.

3) If I were a gold digger, as mentioned earlier in Post #13, "Btw, those men didn't pursue me simultaneously; so I rejected one by one over the years, without knowing who's next for me. If I were after their money, I would have accepted the first man when he first pursued me, coz after all, why would I wait for the unknown/uncertainty?"

Hopefully the above clarifies your doubts. smile.gif
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3) Would you date or marry someone who isn't rich? I think that would give us and yourself a clearer perspective
titanmelvin
post Jul 19 2018, 07:14 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 19 2018, 04:22 PM)
I replied that in post #36 in this thread: Are girls willing to settle down with poor guys?, March 2017 thread.

FYI, when I first met my fiance, he was unemployed for 5 months. He said he's poor, & when we met, he didn't even dress up properly; just plain & normal clothes, some faded ones, and hair was also not combed & messy. After we started dating, he was unemployed for another 6 months.

I was with him since his unemployment till today, went through ups and downs with him.

& that's how I could come up with this statement:
Hope this answers your question.
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It doesn't answer the question, if you would marry someone who isn't rich?
titanmelvin
post Jul 21 2018, 01:42 AM

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Hi Ralna,

Since you claim to be highly ambitious, i doubt that you are actually satisfied with what you have achieved so far on your own.

Since you claim to be intelligent, i presume that you know that the quickest and easiest ways to get rich are, by luck(lottery etc.), inheritance or marrying someone rich. I don't think luck or inheritance applies in your case. Do you think, whether consiously or subconsciously, the last option was part of your strategy to becoming rich?
titanmelvin
post Jul 21 2018, 02:51 AM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 21 2018, 02:20 AM)
Yes, I also doubt I would ever be satisfied with what I have achieved so far on my own. If born into more privileged family with the best nurturing, perhaps, I could go even further in life, or maybe not, coz I'd end up being a spoilt brat. We won't know.  hmm.gif
I think I repeated that many times before, whether I actually aim to marry someone rich. See this reply, again, quoting Post#11 & Post#20:
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To be more specific, I want to marry a man who has winner mindset. See Point 5, first post:
Such a man has my highest and utmost respect. I adore such men to the core. I worship them, read their biographies, like them on FB, follow their news, and subscribe to their LinkedIn too.

If I had met such a man, who was at his lowest point in life, I would have been the woman who earned that pot of gold with him. I was poor before, but I managed to rise up from poverty and misery. My emotional strength in times of his lowest point of life, will also be his emotional strength. I want to be that woman.

Isn't that what marriage vow is for? "For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part"

I have not said this vow to my fiance in public, but we said it to each other, already.  wub.gif
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You gave a different answer in your previous reply, in which you said that you will only marry someone who is rich, or will get rich in the future. I'm sure you can understand that potential, hard work, intelligence does not guarantee that someone will definitely become rich. I highly doubt that you would have feelings or stick around with someone who is at his lowest point, as you would simply filter him out.

Since your current post states a different answer and gives a different impression, you have my respects if that is what you really think and will do. Thank you for your replies.

QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 19 2018, 07:32 PM)
I'll make sure he has the potential to get rich before I marry him, otherwise it's a no.

Why? Think this way:

If you have a daughter, and she wanna marry a poor man, would you agree? Most likely not.
Even if you agree, you wanna find out whether, in the future, your daughter will suffer or not if she's married to him. Otherwise, don't bother to get married. Choose another man.

If you have a daughter, and she's a high-flyer from young, always the top in studies and in career, would you want her to marry an average male?
Or, would you prefer her to be married to someone equally ambitious and successful?

Often, males who are ambitious and successful, are rich. It'd be an irony if he's not, unless he donates his wealth away, or just got bankrupt or got conned.
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You gave a different answer in your previous reply.
titanmelvin
post Jul 21 2018, 12:44 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 21 2018, 10:51 AM)
You got it right, but let me clarify further.

I will make sure such a man will eventually get rich, only if he has the qualities you mentioned, and he is teachable (willing to listen to his woman), and follows through no matter what it takes.

I don't waste time on men who cause their own poverty due to the lack of ambition, bad habits/addiction, and other factors that led to self-made poverty. Maybe other women wanna save such men, but not me. In other words, I selectively rescue people.

You can't change people who are unwilling to change. If they want to change, they will display the qualities you mentioned.
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What about men who have great qualities, but financial gains is not their main purpose? Such as lecturers, researchers, people not working in the private sector and many more. Will you choose men who are highly capable, motivated but not gonna be rich?
titanmelvin
post Jul 21 2018, 02:27 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 21 2018, 01:04 PM)
To be real honest, I personally don't need to use so much money. If what I have is sufficient for me to live a comfortable life, and it lasts to retirement till the day I die, I'm fine.

But, when considering having a family and starting biz, more money is needed. When considering the rising cost of living and inflation 10 or 20 years later, more money is needed too. How about higher education for the children? Getting more and more expensive too.

For men who are highly capable, motivated but not gonna be rich, I wanna know why.

Is it because they don't want to/ don't dare to/ don't believe they will? Why?

Once I identify that mental barrier, I will also find out the external barriers, such as, his current job has not much of future prospect, or his industry will be out/ replaced by automation & AI etc.

Don't just look at the present. Think far and ahead, and spot risks that other people can't spot.
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Simple example is someone who works in the public sector, nonprofit organizations. Not everyone's goal is to be rich.

What is your definition of living comfortably? Mercedes, bungalows, business class flights?

How much money a month is considered comfortable to you, at current inflation. For the purpose of discussion, say the inflation remains flat at 0%.
titanmelvin
post Jul 21 2018, 06:34 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 21 2018, 05:43 PM)
I know, but aiming to be rich and having the ability/discipline/luck to be rich, are two separate matters.

You can get rich without aiming for it, such as, by knowing how to save in FD and invest in UT (Amanah Saham etc) although you are a salaried employee who earns average income, or by living frugally too as a form of lifestyle coz you prefer simple life, or you avoid using credit cards and have no bad debt at all, these good financial habits will eventually make you rich.


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That was was exactly my question. Would you marry someone who is intelligent, hardworking etc but is not gonna be rich? Say for example, your fiance opens a law firm to help the poor. His ambition is to help others and he is happy with what he does. Would you live your life with him knowing that he is going to be middle class for the rest of his life?
titanmelvin
post Jul 22 2018, 11:59 PM

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QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 21 2018, 09:54 PM)
You really have a problem with accepting the fact that women like financial security, and some women like to marry rich men.

Don't be so idealistic. The pure love you are trying to seek, is rare. See how many marriages end in divorces when $$$ is lacking.

You are single with no family commitments yet. Wait till you get married, or wanna get married.

Perhaps then, and only then, you will realise: Single men are fantasied with the idea that love is everything. Married men will know it's not.
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I think your statement women like financial security applies more to women who aren't financially capable themselves. I believe that financially capable women, whether self-made or family, would prioritize someone who really loves them and have good qualities, instead of finding someone rich as the main factor.

In case you didn't know, rich men tend to cheat more because they are more financially capable to do so, and because many women are attracted to their money.

QUOTE(Ralna @ Jul 22 2018, 01:34 PM)
Alright then, a poor girl should never ever think/aim to marry a rich man, even if he pursues her; otherwise, she's a gold digger.

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That's the definition of a gold-digger, being with someone primarily because of his or her money. If a poor girl marries a rich man because of love and not because of money, then she isn't a gold-digger.
titanmelvin
post Jul 24 2018, 04:49 PM

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1) What do you love about your bf?

2) What do you think your bf loves about you?

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