Welcome Guest ( Log In | Register )

Outline · [ Standard ] · Linear+

 Relationship Joke

views
     
twilight_fever
post Oct 12 2010, 05:39 PM

On my way
****
Junior Member
660 posts

Joined: Oct 2008
From: sunset valley
QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 4 2010, 10:31 PM)
Pink Ping Pong
*
joke not found,some1 enlighten me plz
MyKy44
post Oct 12 2010, 07:26 PM

kaki bodek staff
*******
Senior Member
2,821 posts

Joined: Jan 2008
From: klang
QUOTE(twilight_fever @ Oct 12 2010, 05:39 PM)
joke not found,some1 enlighten me plz
*
trolol'd user posted image
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 12 2010, 11:16 PM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


An insane man goes to the doctor and says "I've got a huge hole in my ass"

The doctors says "drop your pants, bend over and let have a look". "F*ck me!!" says the doctor " what could have made a hole as big as that?"

Patient replies I've been f*cked by an elephant".

The doctor says "An elephants pen1s is long and thin, this hole is enormous".

Patient replies "He fingered me first".
MyKy44
post Oct 12 2010, 11:50 PM

kaki bodek staff
*******
Senior Member
2,821 posts

Joined: Jan 2008
From: klang
more liek he trunked him lol
gregy
post Oct 13 2010, 02:18 AM

Casual
***
Junior Member
411 posts

Joined: Apr 2007


QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 12 2010, 11:16 PM)
An insane man goes to the doctor and says "I've got a huge hole in my ass"

The doctors says "drop your pants, bend over and let have a look". "F*ck me!!" says the doctor " what could have made a hole as big as that?"

Patient replies I've been f*cked by an elephant".

The doctor says "An elephants pen1s is long and thin, this hole is enormous".

Patient replies "He fingered me first".
*
LOL...
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 14 2010, 12:17 PM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


Voodoo d1ck


A young woman's husband was going on a business trip for a week, with her not being the kind of woman to stray, she asked her husband to get her a toy to play with while he was away.

Without any hesitation her husband drove to Ann Summers and picked out the first toy he could find. When he got back his wife tried it out and said to her husband that the toy he had bought didn't satisfy her as much as he did. While obviously taking this as a compliment he went back to Ann Summers and with the help of a member of staff, picked out a much better toy. Again as she tried the toy out, it did not satisfy her as much as she would like.

After another couple of trips to Ann Summers and his wife still not being satisfied, he went back to the shop and told the woman "None of these toys on view are to my wife's needs, have you got anything in the back that could do the job?"
"Come into the back, i might have just the thing!"
"This, is the 'Voodoo d***'... Watch this!....'Voodoo d***', the door!" she shouts.
Almost immediately the toy jumps off the table and flies towards the door, and after 2 minutes the door falls off the hinges.
"Perfect! This should do the trick" he says

So off he goes home to his wife and explains how the toy starts, then leaves for his trip knowing the toy he has purchased will do the job. Later on that night his wife gets the toy out, puts it on the table and says "Voodoo d***, my p@ssy!" to which the toy jumps off the table and does its job.

After half an hour of playing with her toy and the woman clearly satisfied, she attempts to pull the toy out of he ***** and remembers her husband didnt tell her how to stop and remove the 'Voodoo d***'. The woman immediately jumps in her car and heads for the hospital. With the toy still in her ***** and still turned on she is driving erratically over the road. Halfway to the hospital she gets pulled over by the Police. The officer steps out of her car and asks why she is driving like a maniac, to which she replies "I have a Voodoo d*** stuck in my *****!"

The officer, clearly in disbelief turns to walk back towards his vehicle and says "Voodoo d*** my arse!".....

This post has been edited by aLittleMisfit: Oct 14 2010, 12:18 PM
MyKy44
post Oct 14 2010, 05:55 PM

kaki bodek staff
*******
Senior Member
2,821 posts

Joined: Jan 2008
From: klang
^sry man...

the moment i saw voodoo d1ck i trus know wat joke ady. sad.gif
sad effects of lurking too much
hizperion
post Oct 14 2010, 09:19 PM

Average Bitch
*****
Senior Member
913 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
From: The Dupes Heaven; Expire: Oct 2077



^tell me about it
i just need to read thread title and ready to say 'slowpoke'
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 14 2010, 11:16 PM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


lame one


Boy: I think you are ABCDEFGHIJK.
Girl: What does that mean?
Boy: Adorable, beautiful, charming, delightful, elegant, feisty, gorgeous and hot.
Girl: And the 'IJK'?

Boy: I'm just kidding


Added on October 14, 2010, 11:18 pmBoyfriend: Have you heard about that actress thats been stabbed? Cant remember her last name, Reese...?

Girlfriend: Witherspoon?

Boyfriend: No, with a knife.


Added on October 14, 2010, 11:55 pmThere was an awkward silence in Chile after one of the miner's girlfriends suggested they rushed home to have sex, asking "your place or mine"

This post has been edited by aLittleMisfit: Oct 14 2010, 11:55 PM
PrinceHamsap
post Oct 15 2010, 10:55 PM

Legendary
******
Senior Member
1,637 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
From: Munich , Bangkok, Barcelona , KualaLumpur


QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 14 2010, 11:16 PM)
lame one
Boy: I think you are ABCDEFGHIJK.
Girl: What does that mean?
Boy: Adorable, beautiful, charming, delightful, elegant, feisty, gorgeous and hot.
Girl: And the 'IJK'?

Boy: I'm just kidding


Added on October 14, 2010, 11:55 pmThere was an awkward silence in Chile after one of the miner's girlfriends suggested they rushed home to have sex, asking "your place or mine"
*
shit
this two is awesome
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 16 2010, 12:17 AM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


So I was having sex the other day and I was starting to get tired so I asked the girl to "Get on top".

To which she replied, "You haven't raped many girls before have you?"
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 17 2010, 03:17 PM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


Just seen this advert on Pornhub: "Learn how to get a 12 inch c0ck by simply ringing this number".

I rung it.

A nigger called Leroy answered asking what time he should come round.
TSaLittleMisfit
post Oct 18 2010, 04:41 PM

Honorary Lifetime Misfit
*****
Senior Member
886 posts

Joined: Jun 2006
From: MSG Land


So, while playing online, I ended up chatting with this chick who was on the same guild.

She asked me if I wanted to "catch up for a drink and may be play some naughty one-on-one games offline".

Yeah, right ... like that's going to help me gain XP to level up.
Soul-X
post Oct 18 2010, 07:26 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
183 posts

Joined: Apr 2007
From: I live in your dreams
hahhahahahaa!! level up!
MyKy44
post Oct 19 2010, 12:13 AM

kaki bodek staff
*******
Senior Member
2,821 posts

Joined: Jan 2008
From: klang
QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 14 2010, 11:16 PM)
There was an awkward silence in Chile after one of the miner's girlfriends suggested they rushed home to have sex, asking "your place or mine"
*
QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 17 2010, 03:17 PM)
Just seen this advert on Pornhub: "Learn how to get a 12 inch c0ck by simply ringing this number".

I rung it.

A nigger called Leroy answered asking what time he should come round.
*
QUOTE(aLittleMisfit @ Oct 18 2010, 04:41 PM)
So, while playing online, I ended up chatting with this chick who was on the same guild.

She asked me if I wanted to "catch up for a drink and may be play some naughty one-on-one games offline".

Yeah, right ... like that's going to help me gain XP to level up.
*
fukken lol'd laugh.gif
niel82
post Oct 19 2010, 09:56 AM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
107 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
From: Cheras
A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter's bedroom. When she opened the door, she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator. "What are you doing?" she exclaimed. The daughter replied," I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband." Later that week, the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming suond coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on the sofa with her vibrator. "What are you doing?" he exclaimed. The daughter replied," I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband." A couple of days later, the mother heard the humming sound again, this time coming from the den. Upon entering the room, she found her husband watching television with the vibrator buzzing away beside him. "What are you doing?" she asked. He replied," Watching the game with my son-in-law."
xplodingplastix
post Oct 19 2010, 12:35 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
224 posts

Joined: Oct 2010
From: Cyberjaya.SK.Puchong


» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «


omg! i LOLed so much even tho i dun know wat happnd to the pink ball. hahaha
micromaniac
post Oct 19 2010, 01:14 PM

Casual
***
Junior Member
339 posts

Joined: May 2009


QUOTE(xplodingplastix @ Oct 19 2010, 12:35 PM)

*
I wonder whatever happened to the pink ping pong balls. Anyone care to explain?
Baozzz
post Oct 19 2010, 02:02 PM

CURRYPUFF
****
Senior Member
695 posts

Joined: Apr 2006
From: Bun City
QUOTE(micromaniac @ Oct 19 2010, 01:14 PM)
I wonder whatever happened to the pink ping pong balls. Anyone care to explain?
*
tht was a troll joke tongue.gif
niel82
post Oct 19 2010, 09:06 PM

Getting Started
**
Junior Member
107 posts

Joined: Jan 2003
From: Cheras
    A man with a stuttering problem tries everything he can to stop stuttering, but he can't. Finally, he goes to a world renowned doctor for help. The doctor examines him and says "I've found your problem. Your penis is twelve inches long. It weighs so much that it's pulling on your lungs, causing you to stutter." So he asks, "What's he cure, doc?" The doctor replies, "Well, we have to cut off six inches."
    The man is eager to cure his stuttering so he agrees to the operation. The operation is a success, and he stops stuttering. Two months later, the man calls the doctor and tells him that since he's had the 6 inches cut off, all of his girlfriends have dumped him, and his love life has gone down the tubes. He insists that the doctor do another operation to add the six inches back on.
    There is silence on the other end of the telephone, so the man repeats, "Hey doc, didn't you hear me? I want my six inches back!" Finally, the doctor responds, "F-f-f-f-f-f-u-c-k y-y-y-y-ou!

126 Pages « < 122 123 124 125 126 >Top
 

Change to:
| Lo-Fi Version
0.0365sec    0.55    6 queries    GZIP Disabled
Time is now: 1st December 2025 - 03:52 PM