+1. Not an easy job.


You do phrase you sentence nicely. Is it your turn soon?

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Added on June 19, 2012, 5:28 pmPay for a surrogate mother. It's not impossible. But from jayqc perspective, it's probably more cost effective to raise his kids up together with a deceived mother or a few deceived mistress? Just business POV.

This post has been edited by RUI: Jun 19 2012, 05:28 PM

Firstly I want to address TS

I'm sorry to hear of your dad's irresponsible behavior. I can only imagine your sense of shock and betrayal you felt.

Having said that, take the feeling you felt and multiply it by 10.
that would be approximately what your mom will feel if she ever finds out.
Bearing in mind she almost committed suicide the last time she found out your dad was unfaithful, it is logical NOT to let your mom know.

What can you do?
You and your siblings must make extra effort to make your mom happy.
What ever you have done in the past that made her happy, do it more.
take her mind off your dad, occupy her with social activities. bring her out for shopping, involve her with other ladies of her age group.

find out your mom's favorite activities and participate in them with her.
find out her dreams, what she wanted to do when young but didn't because she had you and your siblings. get to know her deeper than you have ever known her before.

The whole idea is to give her new purpose, new interest, new social life JUST IN CASE she ever finds out about what your dad did.

if she never finds out, then she would have lived a much more fulfilling life.
if she does find out, she has something else to move on to and that will ease the pain she will feel.

I know it's not much but that's all you can do as children.

Now for the side issue.
from the many responses, can we all agree that 7-8 out of 10 feel that in essence, marriage is sacred and partners should be faithful to each other?

I actually feel sorry for folks like jayqc because of the shallowness of their worldview.
to such people, it's "Me first".

maybe jayqc is still young. Does he still have parents? are they still together?
if they are. how would he feel if he found out one day, mom is unfaithful to dad, or dad is having an affair? Would he still be so flippant? Or has it already happened to his parents? (I sincerely hope not!!)

The point i'm trying to make is this.
It's easy to make comments when it does not involve you personally.

you should put yourself in TS's shoes before you post.

Ok now you want to talk about gender equity. Stop being a male chauvinist pig (MCP) where you think Male are born to do everything and anything they like because they are born with a d*** and not a womb. Tell me, since you mentioned what's wrong with man having two lovers at the same time then why not a woman having 2 lovers at the same time? Tell me the DIFFERENCE? So you might say, oooo.. man can fool around and implant some seeds (maybe kena or not) then cabut and girls have to bear the consequences of having kids that's why they can't fool around like man do?? Tell me the logic of it! ..

From your bolded reply, you're seriously one plain selfish dude that only thinks of yourself, yourself and YOURSELF. Having a baby with a girl without marriage... ahem... and what about the baby's feeling in the future? Oh.. my parents are still in bf-gf relationship.. and nope, they're not married so that my dad can go fool around with many woman that possibly produce more of my one sided siblings! How sick can your thoughts be?

This post has been edited by cutiesbaby312: Jun 19 2012, 06:47 PM

Woman CAN still fool around. But the difference is that maybe kena or not, woman STILL have to bear the consequences while man have ALMOST no consequences at all. So it's advisable don't take such risk at all. Law of nature is sexist itself.

This post has been edited by RUI: Jun 19 2012, 08:47 PM

Well... this is about having protected sex or not. Both have to bear the consequence but what I was trying to imply was the gender equality

Ohhh, the different is we don't have a d***

TS, your father dam power. U should be like him

ok fine I am immature n childish. Tell me why so many divorce cases?

If everyone is happy in polygamous marriage, then i don't see any problem in it.


In what way I use my man power to talk **** here?

another way around if the guy is bankrupt or has financial difficulties, i doubt the woman will stand by his side too. this world is real. if everything goes fine, everyone is happy. if things are not smooth, we can see the true person identities.

I don't think any girls would be willing.

I re-quote what i said earlier in page 7 "you wanna talk about gender equality? there are certain things men can do while society accepts it while certain things women do society will make a fuss abt it. example, a woman has 2 men. "
Society so far has accept the fact that it is not surprising men can have extra marital. But if women have it, society still cannot accept it. It is just perception. Like guys rape girls are common. But if girl rape guys, society still cannot accept that. they will say like how is that possible. bla bla bla. In addition, I am not a MCP. the bolded part which you highlighted. I disagree with it. I am not a selfish person. If i am, I would advice ts not to care abt the woman and the baby, which in fact I ask ts to care for them, shower them love the same she showers her future children.

Cause people think like you.

Yes, u advised ts to care about the woman and the baby just because you want TS to accept the fact the her dad can do anything as he likes even bearing the consequences of a soon failing family. TS had repeatedly mentioned that she couldn't believe and accept it when her dad has committed the unforgiving incidents twice and you insisted that what her dad did was acceptable and is COMMON. Is like telling her shits dropped into her rice bowl and still she has to eat it.

The society is changing mate, if you're talking 20 years back maybe your assumption is still accepted but what's harder when her mum raised TS and her siblings through her sweat and blood, not to forget the labor pain she gone through. Just because of her dad's appetite is big and done his responsibilities as a dad/husband, he can go fool around? Is there even justice here? Unable to fulfill the vows of marriage is already bad, what more when TS's mum has to even bear the heart-tearing consequences of her dad's wrongdoings? Dude, mistake is done and everyone has to pay for their mistakes. Don't twist around your distorted thoughts and convinced us as if it's so damn right.

Oh.. if you haven't noticed, most of the replies here DID NOT agree to your opinion as satisfying man's needs outside of his marriage. So? It is still not society accepted.

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Added on June 19, 2012, 9:35 pmAgreed totally

This post has been edited by cutiesbaby312: Jun 19 2012, 09:35 PM

Come one the more you replied into this thread the more I feel you are just forever alone person. Cuz those replies might be make sense and work only on the guy like you. What if one day you lost your cock and then you can't happy happy/ ush ush your gf leaves you and tell you, sorry you can't give me a baby, we are over, you are nothing? Is this a society fault? Is this what you meant exactly now? :hmm

Don't use the society case to bring in this thread. If you wanna talk about society, now most of the lyn members are not accept /encourage what TS father did to the family included the future baby. FAULT IS FAULT

This post has been edited by cutiepooh: Jun 19 2012, 09:49 PM

Jayqc, i dont know why in the world you think that the wife will leave the husband when the husband is bankrupt or having financial difficulties. its either u watch too much movies or you havent find true love.. You use money to use women, of couse they will leave u when u are in hot water. i doubt the girls here in this thread will leave our husbands when they having difficulties, i will instead stand by him and find ways to make things better... You dont really understand what love and commitment means do you?

So what you want ts's to do? scold the father? disown the father? the father has been like this all these years. If you want to blame , blame the mother for not wearing a pair of eyes to know the father. I believe the father has been like this even before knowing the mother . but the mother still accept him and marry him. If the mother can accept it 20 years ago, why cant she accept it now? A person's character never change.

okay lar i forever alone . You have so many people chasing you till lining up all the way to kowloon street in hong kong. lyn members in this forum all acting like very righteous. when troubles come rocking yr boat, we see whether you all still be calm or not.


you seem to know them very well. everyone is just having a front mask to cover their face.

Jonrev, I doubt the screw in his (Jayqc) brain has rusted. He doesn't understand both love and life. A person like him prefers short-term happiness and won't really care about how to deal with the real society.

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Added on June 19, 2012, 10:09 pmCome on la, Who are "WE" to support you. You should wake up la. You are the one who acts like a judger/ ASSssHOLE of everything. Please don't pull others into the same thought like you.

This post has been edited by cutiepooh: Jun 19 2012, 10:12 PM

Likewise, I somehow felt that you're pointing to your own character.

You're real funny dude. You said her mother accepted 20 years old but why not now? Because every person deserves a second chance! Forgive once is wise, forgive twice is FOOLISH! Moreover, this cheating is way beyond acceptable. Sigh.. the more you replied, the more I feel you're a person who puts all blame to the WIFE/MUM only. So I highly think you're a person who highly deny your mistakes in your life as well and blame others for what it happened. Where's your judgement of right/wrong dude? BTW, how old are you Im wondering..

Forever alone I guess he might be in the stage of Andropause

ok, first of all why they want to have a mask to cover their face? to impress u?
most of our fathers had financial difficulties including my late father who was sick and jobless at one point, i dont see my mum leaving my dad and go find other richer guys. my uncle is a bankrupt till today, and yet his wife is still by his side to start up a family business. In your life there is only two words and those two words in your dictionary are combined 'happiness =pleasure".

What you said it's really contradicting here. You were suggesting TS to accept the woman and the son, acting so calmly and righteous, but now you're highlighting doubting how would we handle the situation of TS?

okay. judger? why do you say that?

I did not blame the mother. I just say the man (ts's dad) is she choose herself, she cannot blame anyone. she gotta accept the fact that the husband she chose is someone who likes to 'eat outside'. btw, many guys who eat outside once will continue the second time. Unless ts come here tell us it is an arranged marriage. then different story .


What's wrong being forever alone? I am happy being alone. Relationship is like being inside a prison.

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Added on June 19, 2012, 10:27 pmokay jonrev.

can't comprehend what you are writing. can re-structure?

This post has been edited by jayqc: Jun 19 2012, 10:27 PM

That's the point. You only think and think TS's mom was choosing the wrong person. She should bear all the consequences now. Talk like a human please. You said and you said you pity the other woman. I think you boat is sinking now. You don't know the real love thingy and you pretended you know everything. Relationship is like being inside a jail/prison. So now, it meant that you never ush-ush that's why you kept arguing your right to the previous reply -----> what's wrong having affair with others is wrong. If you are really happy being alone so why were you asking so much about Sex Sex thingy? You treat women as a sex toy is it? Haizzzzzzzz. Please don't represent other guys that your argument is so right. No every guys think like you.

This post has been edited by cutiepooh: Jun 19 2012, 10:42 PM