correct

Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. -- in life, no one helps you once you're fcuked.

------
Guy: want to hear a joke about my kok? nevermind its too long
Girl: want to hear a joke about my vagina? nevermind you won't get it

I'm lately on a roll with female as sex object.


I ask for sex, they object.

Definition of:

Bisexual - I'd buy anything sexual
Trisexual - I'll try anything sexual

whoooolaaa! I finally finished reading the whole V1 thread.

"Your cock is so small, I can't even feel it," my wife shouted at me during one of our rare sexual encounters.

"Well, it's exactly the same size that it was when I married you," I replied. "You must've grown out of it."

The retribution will not be pretty if one says that to the missus.

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle..
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.

There are 3 things in life that are certain -

Death,

Taxes,

and that if you load up Windows Media Player and the volume control is set right down to 2 or 5 out of 100, it means that the last person on there was watching porn.

It's being reported that Muammar Gaddafi has surrounded himself by an elite core of 40 female bodyguards, all of whom are virgins.

In a related story, Charlie Sheen invaded Libya.

loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool :thumbsup:

(it's funny cos it's true)

---

Added on March 25, 2011, 5:54 pm
Actually Africa has tons of fat people. Especially on the west/north-west. everyone there in the cities are either big, fat, or both.

This post has been edited by deodorant: Mar 25 2011, 05:54 PM

"I didn't sleep at all last night - our new next-door neighbours make so much noise when having sex", my wife complained.

She added, "I think it is extremely anti-social and rude, especially as we never disturb them."

I responded - "Trust me love, you don't need to tell me, that we never disturb them."

A wife asked her husband how he could love her and still enjoy watching porn.

The husband told her, "I love my car but I still watch Formula 1 too."

She was happy with this analogy - Of course he didn't mentioned that occasionally he would went out to the red light district for some rental.

someone's not getting enough actions

You suppose to be gay?

Thai girls supposed to be nong poys.

What's the difference between nong poy and katoi? Are they the same thing?

Oh sh*T! Hahahaha!! Poor thing.

Justin Bieber in Malaysia 2011

This post has been edited by wildcat90: Apr 1 2011, 04:06 PM

Tom was texting this girl he met on the internet

Tom then text her saying 'Get naked. Now.'

She wrote 'How do you know I'm not already...?'

Tom replied 'Binoculars.'

This post has been edited by aLittleMisfit: Apr 1 2011, 01:54 PM

I'm so awesome, I have lots of friends and I'm popular with girls!!


... Just kidding, April Fools!


Sigh...