thank you.

this is going to be the two months already. it was a really heartache because i thought we could make it for our future but since with the break up due to no reason, i already tried to stay and mingle around in the past for a month. now it is time for me to move on for my better future. some people may say i am selfish to think for myself only at this moment. it is not that i do not love him, i loved him much more than myself but my heart needs a break off from all the hurt too. i tried everything i can to save the relationship, but since it did not show any progress, i think i will just leave it be while i spend my time to upgrade myself to be a better person.

i laughed so happily with my friends, and now after i am back to my room alone, i am able to just focus at things that i want to do for myself instead of wondering if he would online, or mingle in the past anymore.

depression? no, i will not want to get depressed for anyone else anymore. i was stupid enough, i just want to learn to be smart to protect myself, and to love myself in the future. he does not worth for my tears at all. if we are meant to be together, we will be.

All the best to u. Be strong and never let devil take control of ur soul....

i would like you said, laugh so happily with friends, tease each other and do some crazy stuff...but when i'm back home, alone in my room, i cant help but to think back of her...honestly i still miss her badly...does that show that i have not get over her yet? sometimes i thought i have gotten over it but deep down its not that easy. Pretty tough as she is my first.

hey baronic..
wise words.. i just broke up.. n im feeling really shitty right now.. this helped a lot.. will try to follow some of the stuff u said... the thing about deciding to forget is very very true.. most difficult part.. anyways thanks..

It's ok to give self sometimes to mingle in the sweets and sour memories. But after decide to let go, i recall every places, moments we share together, and left the feelings and memories at that place. when all the pieces had left away, its the time the let go process over and be a new me.
to get over something the best way is to face it. right?
just my 2 cents . =)

sometimes i prefer to cry alone loudly then go to bed. u will have a good sleep after the cry.
but is not good for health. when i on my msn, lot of friends online, but i've no idea what to chat about. i dont want to start telling my love story. sooner or later, all ur friends will run away from u.

i called him few days back to meet up for a dinner. after the dinner, i couldn't take it finally, i hug him so tight n cry out loud. i told him everything without any hiding. he knew i miss him, he knew i love him, he knew i need him. but i wont force him. i knew he has something to do. if he didnt do it, he will think about it forever even when he start a new relationship. i feel better after the confession.

winnie pooh, ur words inspired me a lot. i will miss him, love him, but i will learn to love myself. wish him happy and fortunate. if he is mine, he will come back to me. if he loves me too, he should know what to do

I admire Winne's determination.

i think i am slighly better, because i do not miss him that much anymore. i thought i am that weak because i was in a very bad condition earlier, until i had no mood to work at all but then after all now i feel like a new start for me. i just feel i am a newly born baby and able to strive as high as i want now.

sometimes it is good to cry it all out then off to bed, but not everyday.
i have a lot of people in msn too but not many that i will chat with, in fact i can say there is none of my friends knows about my break up at all, i also could not imagine how i went through all that alone. i just chat with my friends, topics for me and my friends. sometimes we need a place to release out the sadness within us, but if we keep telling people the sad story, we are only keep reminding ourselves about it and it makes us to be sad.

i am just here to share my experience, this time i know i fell down badly in love because i do really love him that much but sadly it just does not work out. so for me the best will be just leave it as how it is. i hope you will be able to find your happiness too, i believe that if there is one person does not know how to appreciate you, there will be more than a person know how to appreciate you in the future, because everything in this world, has two sides.

thank you debbieyss, i just hope to learn a lesson in life and have a better future. it was a broken heart thing for me but without getting all the hurt, i will not know how can i get the recipe to cure it when i have a cut again

i have learnt a lot from the mistake.
one of my friend told me that "if i sad for 1 minute, i lose the happiness for 1 minute". I will try my very best to live as happy as i can.
thank you and all the best to you.

I feel so outcast-ed these days since I haven't been able to go online in campus. But never mind that fact.

@nlgoh

You have to let it go bit by bit. Not that we are asking you to let go of it entirely in one go. Practically no one can do that unless you are someone who is always getting in and out from a relationship. Just take it easy and at your own pace.

@WInnIe PoOh

Great to hear that from you. Seriously like what debbieyss said, you have very strong determination. Even stronger than that of I have with me although I am determined to get out from my comfort zone and start working things out for myself.

The key here is not to give up even when you fail, but in fact, stay strong and firm with your principles. Each time we fall, we'll learn about the mistakes and stand up once again.

I have this principle, never repeat the same mistake twice and, never give up even though I am fighting a losing battle.

do not try, just do it. i believe it will be much better compare to just think only.

i do not know if i do really have very strong determination, but i think i just do not want to waste my time anymore. may be i already went deep down, i guess there is nothing for me to lose anymore other than my precious time in life. i am a stubborn person, i do not surrender and give up easily. i will always fight till i am completely lose but still i will find ways to get up to fight again.

yes, never make the same mistake twice. the last when i talked to him which about more than a week ago, i actually thank him for the time we spent together, and make me realize my mistakes. if he was lucky to be with me, then my future bf/husband will definitely be more lucky than him

Good thinking. I get what you mean by "gotten deep down" since much of the time, strength, tears, patience etc has been wasted. Nothing is more important than all time you have wasted and getting back on track to where you want to be and what you want to do.

It's also good that you know how to put it in that way that he's unlucky/dumb/stupid to lose someone like you.

Winnie, as you said you are a stubborn people, me too. Have you ever found yourselves have no dignity at all while you lower down your pride and keep holding on but he simply doesn't appreciate it?

Would you patch back with him if he pursues you one day later?

i do not intend to say he is unlucky or dumb or stupid to lose me, but i will just want to make sure i will be a better person and my future partner will be much more lucky than him to have me. he is also a nice person but things just do not work out.

yes, when now think back, i found myself have no dignity at all while i lower down my pride and kept holding on but he does not appreciate it. i was ashamed on myself when i found myself lost myself for some one else but yet the person does not appreciate me. i sacrificed a lot, he knew about it too. when we were together, he knew what had i gone through and i just could not get up from the dream but continued in that. until after that, now when i think back, i do feel i was such an idiot because no matter what, we should not lose our pride and dignity.

as for future, i can not say for sure. if a day i meet him again, i will still treat him as a friend, i do not delete his msn and facebook, because i am all cool with it and i do not purposely keep it to hope for any patch back. i just leave it there as he is one of my friends.

Your case is very much similar to me.

I lower down my dignity and pride to pursue and all I got was cold response from him (I'm not going to put in details for this).

But then, I have not regret on my stubbornness, or everything I have done to him. Maybe I'm silly enough, huh?

I did try to patch up my relationship before it was finally called off by her. Just like in your case, I put my ego, pride and dignity aside just to patch it back again. However, what I've done wasn't appreciated very much in the end. All along, it was as though I was the only one trying to save the relationship.

I often wonder, does the stubborn ones tend to last longer than those who aren't?

Well, I just wonder: will I be cruel to reject as well when the one that trying to patch back is not me?

Is it what that comes easily will not be appreciated?

dear winnie, i just couldn't let go, not that i never try to. i shouldn't just let him off when he try to patch me back. i m self blaming. and now i try to patch him, just within 1 month, he just don't want to give a try anymore. i've been keeping the determination until now. and what i found out now is that, the more i try to patch, the more i get hurt.. deeply hurt...

Ha! same case as me. I stuff aside my pride, ego and whatnot. I literally begged her to come back with me, its not that i'm such a lousy bf or what but she told me she doesnt feel right when she is with me. I couldnt accept her reason and thats why its so hard to let go of her.

The more i looked and acted like a self-pity person the more she said no to me. And now i've realised that no matter what happens, i've got to move on with my life. I dont need her to live my life, i've got to love myself first.

I'm letting it go bit by bit everyday...very slowly...it still hurts till now whenever i think back...

yes, i read some of your posts and i think our case is pretty much similar. i think in our life, we will always be silly for someone no matter that person appreciate us or not.

i think so, things that come easily will not be appreciated, i think people tends to take things for granted, this is just the nature part of a human being. i do not want to make it so hard for the new candidates but i am now learn to take things slowly step by step. i just need to learn, how to protect myself before i want to commit myself into another relationship.

dear nlgoh, you can let go if you decide to. no one can teach you what to do or help you because it is all about you yourself. you can everyday lie to everyone or even yourself that you have already let go but if you do not be firm with it, you will never be able to let go.

i actually put a note on my table, it serves a purpose to remind myself not to contact him through internet. as for my phone, i purposely remove him from my speed dial, as well from the call list. i changed his name over the contact there, whenever i tried to search, i just remind myself that no and no and no. at first it was so difficult, but i took two days, until without any notes to remind myself anymore, i just do not do that anymore. no doubt i do still think of him sometimes but whenever i go to the places we been before, i just put a smile on face and let the bygone be bygone.

i tried to patch back, thought of giving us a try within a month time but in this 1 month time things did not went well so i just call it off and forget about it. i think it is about ourselves, for me i might sound very experienced and strong but seriously, this is the first time i find it so hard to let go at all. i could not and felt suicidal, now i think back, i am actually lucky that he gave me a great time in life, and i have learnt a lot of things. now i just tell myself, loving some one does not mean to be with the person. i do not place my happiness on anyone else anymore because it is on my hands for me to find out by myself.

my dear, i believe you can get over it soon. try to be positive. if a girl like me who cut on the wrist before, took in pills but could get over it, what makes you think that you can not?