this is the story. we were talking over on the issue about to meet up or not on that night for dinner. as the earlier plan we were supposed to meet and i do have some surprises for him too. eventually the discussion did not went well so we had some arguments. there were no phone conversations involved but only msn and sms. at the end he got angry and suggested just break up. at that time, we talked about the break up. we were having quite many arguments throughout the relationship, at the end we quite tired of it and furthermore i forgotten he was getting the pressure from his parents whom did not agreed on the relationship. so we sort of like, break up in a very good way. he told me that he is not good for me and i deserve a better one.

all the while we still keep in touch very well, and hang out as like normal but we never let our parents know about it. in fact he does not tell anyone about it until today. we talked about the patch back before but there was no answer. he told me he wants to enjoy to be single now and he does not want to see anyone else at the moment. it is quite confusing i think because i also do not know how to explain it.

I suggest you leave him to be as he is first for the time being. Don't push him and yourself. I am also sure that you two aren't certain over what you guys want to do and go about it. For now let time do the job. Should everything be smooth sailing miracles will happen. (Praying for you too)

Believe in miracles girl!

i am leaving him as he is for now, but i do not understand what do you mean by do not push him? i do not actually want to push him. eventually i know what mistakes i make last time in the relationship but i know both of us also need osme time to realize and also find out how we have progress and improve from the mistakes.

what do you mean by what both of us have not over with what we want to do?

i hope miracles happen too

do not push him = do not bug him all the time with smses, calls, emails or whatever means of communication. Give it some time for you and him to clear things off mind. You may sms or call him once say every 3 days to show that you still care but not too often to let him feel pressured.

What DreMax was saying, was that both of you two are still uncertain which step to take from here. He felt pressured by his parents and also by you so he doesnt know if he wants to continue with this relationship or not. While for you, you are confused over his actions.

The fact that you two still hang out proves that he is still very much into you. So take it easy for now and let it flow naturally. I know it hurts. I've been there. But if you love him that much, you will give him enough time to let him make a decision. Respect him as how he should respect you as well.

It is something normal, because we have invested so much emotional attachment to our loved one, so it's hard to let go, and it makes you feel very numb and lost.

But as we go through the process of recovering from the relationship, that makes us a wiser and a more matured person on how to deal with a future relationship. Someone have asked me once on how to become more matured in a relationship. Unfortunately, thinking back on the amount of pain I have gone through, I couldn't say much.

This post has been edited by geekster129: Nov 25 2009, 11:16 AM

how fragile a relationship is... it changes all the time even before we manage to overcome it. tough luck
i saw him yesterday after like 2 weeks didnt contact to each other. i wanted to say something, but i don't know what to say... i wanted to smile, but i just couldn't get rid of my sadness... we were in the same lift, nothing but silence. my heart feel pain everytime i see this situation, i am so angry with my decision. i feel so stupid. i love the song by leona lewis, better in time.. i know i m gonna be ok.. time heals..

yes, i took note on that so i do not call him or disturb him that often anymore. he knows i still care about him but i do not want him to get the pressured again. i think this is not that hurt compare to earlier and other issues. i do not know if he wants to continue or continue or not but i also can not do much.

Somehow I always believe time heals but there was one day my friend enlighten me with one word: Time doesn't heal until your determination to let go.

This statement is very very true.

Good evening all

The more pain you went through, the stronger you get and the more matured you are.

Anyone wanna go for a swim? It's one of the very few ways where you can get your mind off certain things. Working out is the best solution

You are right.. but time will wear off one's determination.. when you come to a point where you can no longer take the pain, and that's where you get enlightenment and will let go..

DreMax, i like to swim when i am upset... you hardly hear anything beside your own breathing, is a good way to release your stress. unfortunately, i got no time to swim recently...

Actually that's what I did ever since my girl left me. Every week when I get home from campus I'll take it down to the pool to swim myself tired. It doesn't only feel better when you can sleep soundly thanks to being tired but also it kinda relieves what's in the head.

Probably we people should have a get-together and have a swim all together

Or the easier way is... Time doesn't heal until you found someone better.

I took a slightly different strategy. After me and my girl were no longer couples, I took the time to try out things I have never done before in Life, and boy, it's a totally fresh and a great experience.

I don't know, maybe I'll continue to follow this path, and maybe one day I'll find a new GF in the process.

I tried chatting with an open heart with my ex today, and weeded off all the negativities and jealous feelings. I don't know why. It's just feels good.

This post has been edited by geekster129: Nov 25 2009, 10:25 PM

It's been a long time i don't swim to tired.

Everyone adopts different ways at the very end when we decide to move on. I don't know I just feel like I need to work my physique out to get my mind working in the correct channel, frequency, momentum etc etc

We should organised one one here. Probably a get together activity and then chit chat session. Something ala /k/ gathering la.

Good night everyone! Me going to be orang asli tomorrow for 3 days

This post has been edited by DreMAx: Nov 25 2009, 11:48 PM

ah yes. the best way to get things off my mind is still to exercise. i go for runs, badminton and swimming sessions. Workout damn hard and then at night can sleep soundly. Feels pretty awesome when the next morning you wake up fresh.

i'm glad you found light to weed off all the negative feelings. Its not easy task you know to be able to let it all go for good. Cheers to u

orang asli? u're going for volunteering work? awesome!

Yeah, I know. It's not easy, and going through it is no joke.

But if I don't let it go, it will continue to haunt me forever.

I want to swim... i miss the time swimming alone till tired...

I did try to look for a new one. But it is just not the right thing, i ended up hurt more n deep. You need to heal first before starting a new one. Otherwise, it will be unfair for the new one too.

I did try to talk to him, chat with him even went movie with him. But the minute we say goodbye, the feelings ain't good at all.. I had the feeling of being separate again.. I dont't like it. Everytime after that, i need to suffer for a period of time. I did something which i don't normally do, without realising, is actually what my ex loves to do, his hobby.

You should do it again..

Jom! Someone organize la.. Orang asli?? why?

Had been in a gathering once with some CC members early this year. Missed those outing days. Hope we can have a gathering too and enlarge our social circle.