broking up is painfull...it has been few months,but he's stil on my mind..sometimes i stil hope he'll come back to me..but i know he won't

I think the best to do for normal human is cry and cry and keep hoping him/her to come back.

Mature ppl will realise that he/she glad it happened because imagine the person leave u on your wedding day or after u have child?

No, don't do that. Please.

i have been crying non stop.. but you know what, is not going to solve any problem. i have slowly learn to face the reality, no one know what is gonna happen in the future. may be he will come back to me, or may be i will get a better one.. but no one deserve to take away my happiness.. i am trying to live happily every second of my life.

in the past few days, i thought i can forget about him and not to contact him but somehow we had some phone conversations and as well chatting over the net. i started to do a lot of thinking if there is a way for us to patch back or may be there is no such thing call patch back.

until not too long ago, i started to wonder what do i really want. i am quite stubborn in this issue, i can see myself willingly to sacrifice everything for him without hoping anything in return. i used to do that but i do not know if it is alright for me to do so. after all i told myself, please let go and no more being a stubborn girl. i do not want to kill myself by being such an idiot in life.

i can not deny the feelings for him is still strong but i can not always make myself so unhappy. i do not know what can i do to save this relationship again or may be it is impossible to be saved but i know i can learn to let go. i do not drop any tears anymore whenever i think of that, is that a good start? i hope i can learn to be a better person, for myself.

Good evening all. I am back again after camp.

@winnie pooh
Yes when your tears stops rolling down when you think of it, it's actually showing signs that you are moving on from it.

loved ur determination.. u're a really strong-minded gal..

i hope so, i think i am just paying more attention to other things in my life now, especially my career. i used to strive very high and also i lost a lot of chances after being together with him. now i do feel happy when i think i am finally back to myself.

thank you for your compliment. eventually i do give people one kind of impression of being strong. may be it was due to my experiences in life but overall i do have times when i feel like crying and needed a shoulder to lean on. i will not deny the fact that i cried badly over him but i know that would be the past. i know a lot of things in life are depending on how we want to take it. no doubt i tried to do a lot of things hoping to patch back the relationship but i think i have to thanks to the cruel fact which woke me up from the dream again, it is ended since the day we broke up. i do have my own reputation and as well my personalities, of course i do not want to be the annoying ex gf for him. furthermore, i need to carry myself well, just for myself. i believe, i deserve better.

I'm glad to hear that.

thank you. i am now working hard to patch back the friendship with my friends. i lost a lot of friends after being together with him, after all i think it was not worth it for me to lost my lovely friends, because they are the only one who never hurt me at all throughout the years, and they are always there for me whenever i am down.

Hi Winnie, glad to know that you are standing firm on your decision.

You're strong and bold, and lovely as well.

Yes. It's true, Winnie. Your closest friends are the most important people who give you strength to move on with Life. Widening your social circles is one of the way you can explore more about your life, and what you have missed out. That is what makes your life become much more meaningful for years to come.

Good luck in your life's journey.

This post has been edited by geekster129: Nov 29 2009, 02:58 PM

It's been two months and yet I have not move on.

just wondering have u had sleepless nights most of the night due to this?

thank you debbieyss, i just want to get back to myself. after all the hurt and everything, i know it does not worth for all the tears, heartbreak and so on for someone who does not appreciate me. i am not to say he is bad, i know both of us make mistakes in the relationship. but even if wanting to patch back a relationship, it needs two person to work it out, i can not do it all alone.

yes, i just completely forget about him in these two days. i enjoyed my time with my friends and family. i do not bother if he was online, i do not care if he is able to wake up in the morning for work, i do not bother to find him at all. i told myself, i am not a bad girl, even though i will not say i am the perfect or good gf but i know what sort of quality i have in me. i am not playing any trick, i think i just deserve a break for myself and my heart. i just want to enjoy my time and ensure i strive high again in my career.

if he loves me, he knows where to find me; if he misses me, he knows how to get hold of me; if he wants to patch back, he knows what to do.

i think i just make it as simply as like it is for now.

Good good. Great to hear that from you. Look at things at a wider perspective from now on and think outside the box.

As for me, I have more time for my studies... My results were kinda bad due to these issues which has bother me 2 months.

i wish to be as strong as u.. i can lie to the whole world how tough i can be, but when it comes to late night, i know i m just that weak.. may be because i m self blaming, that make me so difficult to let go.

I can understand how you feel. It's like that feeling of solitude. Sometimes it happens to me too. Working late at night, and after finish work, getting dinner yourself, sitting in the restaurant alone, man! It sucks, and all the crazy thoughts emerge in your mind.

Worst thing is, at the "so-right" moment of time, so happened that none of your friends can chat with you.

This post has been edited by geekster129: Dec 1 2009, 06:44 PM

thank you dremax, i am trying my best to do everything that i can. i am very happy in these few days with my friends around. i manage to make it until like, i do not even bother to look at my phone to try to sms him again. i do not even bother it anymore. finally, i feel i am just happy and i am setting some new goals for myself in year 2010.

i was like you too. i was very depressed, i washed my face with tears every night too. i even tried to commit suicide due to this. i did a lot of stupid things, i even lied to myself to make myself to be there for him, kept telling myself that he would be back but until i was so tired and cried until my tears are dried.

my dear, if you do not learn how to love yourself, who will ever care to love you? i do not lie to myself, i told him too that i love him very much and i do not deny any of my feelings. i think, i put it in a way which i choose to face everything instead of running away from it. i missed him, i told him. i loved him, i told him. when now im typing this, i do think of him but i do not think that i have the feeling want to talk to him at the moment, because i have my other work to do. i told myself that, i want to love myself first before i love anyone again. may be in the future i will not love any other guys as how i love him anymore but i can not say it for sure in the future, no matter what, i know the most important thing is, my own happiness.

Well done! I totally know how you feel because i'm in the same situation as you're in. It's a sense of relaxation and finally able to breath smoothly after all the depression.