QUOTE(steevan1000 @ Jun 2 2022, 09:59 AM)
i dont understand
it's very hard to make balance for work-kids-self
I am a father of two, and like most of us, I am working too. I do not earn 20k per month. I finish with my Master and looking forward to PhD (currently preparing my research proposal and IELTS). Besides all that, I am UN Online Volunteer, supporting a non-profit organisation from Papua New Guinea in their research paper on sustainable development. Of course, I can see my daughter throwing tantrums sometimes, and I believe I am not perfect. But at least, when I am around, in the evening I spent time with my kids gardening and walking. I always travel outstation, Johor, Sarawak, Pahang for work. The weekend is a big no-no for me to work. It is either family time, or if I am rushing on my thesis, I will work on it for a couple of hours. Sometimes, we spent time going to have a walk at the park. In my daily routine (If I am around), normally after dinner, I will prepare my kids to bed, around 9pm, my wife will let my kids sleep and I will continue on my study, personal me-time until 12pm. I try to ensure I get 6hours of sleep daily. Very rare I sleep later than 2am, and honestly, sometimes, it does happen when I did not sleep at all and straight go to the office. But it happens a couple of times. If you are wondering what is my age, I am in my mid-30s. My rule set for my family is - All meals must eat together at the same time, especially dinner. On the weekend, normally I will work on my personal stuff after breakfast with the family. For 2-3 hours after breakfast, I will work on my personal stuff. After lunch, I will spend an hour or two with my kids on their activities. Then continue on with my personal stuff again.
And yes, I do not watch TV (or netflix nowadays). I no longer watch football. You have to sacrifice something. There is never a work-life balance. It is how you juggle in between the load. When you spent time with the kids, you have to do something together with your kids. Drawing, painting, Lego, Playground, heck, I even bought some science puzzles and match them together with my kids. When I am accompanying my kids to bed, I chat with them, asking about their friends, food, schools, etc. At your kids' age, I guess they are entering teenage, getting rebellious. But you should be able to salvage your relationship with them.
I do not know how heavy your workload is, but for me, the work in the office will never end no matter what. No matter how well I perform or spent time on the reports, there will always comment and negative feedback on how they should be written. So, nowadays, I spent more time on my personal goals rather than on the company. After all, the day after I quit/die, the company will have another 100 people queuing up for my position.
Best of luck.