How can girls not work harder when the cost of living keeps increasing and the guys they're dating keep insisting on 50-50? Not every man out there has a provider mindset, u know? When girls expect guys to pay then they're labelled as gold diggers pulak. Girls can never win, can they?

Dun expect wife to cook but prefer a wife that can cook

Find one with a provider mindset lo. It's never about looks or chemistry. I go for what personality the girl have.

I never expect my girl to pay when we goes out. But it's nice for her to pay once a while and yes I do pay most of the time.

You have no idea how long it took me to find one which lives frugally.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jun 19 2025, 12:04 AM

When you have a partner always want to stick with you, congratulation he / she love you.

When you find out your partner start to away from you with all kind of problem, reason, story, congratulation you are gone soon.

To male, please make sure you can continue make good income. If not, sad story begin.

If you are first xxx for her, congratulation she going to remember you for whole life. 99%, you are "THE PERSON I LOVE MOST".

Biggest enemy for male is money, just continue work to overcome it.

To female, please remember you cant always 18 yo but outside always with 18 yo girl ready.

Biggest enemy for female is aging, its beyond repair.

Too bad, female only will know who love them most when they are expired.

A relationship with all kind of problem, reason, story.......Serious, the link is gone. Please out now.

Easier said than done. If I give u 3 years, u also wouldn't be able to find a guy with a provider mindset for me especially in this kinda economy.

You're in the wrong circles then, my circle of friends, all the males have provider mindset. My professional life also the same, whether its business network or colleagues.

However if you're asking if they have enough to provide for you.. that's a different story la

provide is done by willingness, not coercion
I see so many guys and girls couldn't have success in their dating or relationship life because they can be too attached with their current self or where their expectations are

in a simple sense,
they think the world is fixated in just one sense
they are not willing to sacrifice their time/energy/money to explore

thanks to consumerism as well
we can be the product of our surrounding

Good to know. U better gatekeep that group of men before us, "gold diggers" find them lol

You are right. It took me almost 3 years (2 years +) to find someone able to live frugality. Able to come down to my world of living.

It's not about economy. Just be honest with the guy..Me and the girl I am seeing was being super open honest and upfront on what we want in our partner from the moment we met. No playing games, no trying to mind reading. Saves time, not romantic though. Romantic only comes after clearing out all the stuff we want from each other.

Stuff I told my girl, no yearly overseas holiday, I am on FIRE path so I want my girl to live frugally. No unnecessary spending. She is totally ok with it.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jun 19 2025, 12:19 PM

Why don't u try being honest with a guy? The moment they hear u're looking for a provider, they'll immediately assume u're a gold digger n run away. Sometimes I wonder if this is all caused by the girls who have been using them for free meals.

Do you want to date like 6 months to 1 year to know that he doesn't want to provide or would you rather get it over with on first date? I choose to get it out on first or second date.

He don't need to say it directly. You can ask what are your future plans and family? Ask do you mind if I work like donkey so that my future family have better life than me. See his response. If he can give you some plans then he is likely a provider. Then if he said nope he don't want a girl who works like a donkey, then next question you can ask them how can I make sure my family have better life than me if I don't work like a donkey.

This are just suggestion. Whether will work or not I don't know. It's very direct. Not everyone can be super direct. I learn how to be super direct thanks to my female friend. She told me don't waste each other time. Be direct and tell the guy or girl what you want. lol.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jun 19 2025, 12:55 PM

Girls value guys with high income much more than guys value girls with high income.

A high income woman normally will look for a guy who is higher income than her or at least about the same level. There are exceptions but those are rare.

A high income guy normally wont care what a girl income is. Its even normal to date much lower income girls.

What's yr point in relation to what I said?

Aiyoh. It means most guys don't look at girls income while girls look at guys income lol before deciding for a relationship.

To be honest I look at the girl income but I am OK if the girl earns like half my pay as my investment are like bringing in 2-3x my monthly pay on a monthly basis. So not big issue for me if girl is not making much.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jun 19 2025, 01:21 PM

Lol I know what it meant but it's not related to what I said. Go refer back to my post that he quoted.

The people going through this — are they working in fields like accounting or auditing?

Actually, how many occurrences of such cases are there, to be honest?
I'm just curious to know from the opposite gender's experience — is it 50%? 60%? 70%? 80%? 90%? 100%?

What was the age demographic of such males? Were they in their 20s? 30s? 40s?

And what about their place of birth?
Were they from first-tier cities, second-tier cities, or third-tier cities/towns?

I'm also keen to understand the causes, but my initial gut feeling tells me — it's partly due to past cause and effect, partly due to poor upbringing, and partly due to individual limitations.

Financial issue is one of the cause of argument among couples. So if you and your partner can settle the finance part, it remove the main cause of conflict already.

That was how I approach relationships.

This post has been edited by Ramjade: Jun 19 2025, 03:52 PM

Lemme try to break it down:
Generally speaking,
⬆️ Corporate ladder = ⬆️ Income

Girl POV:
See man ⬆️ Income = ⬆️ Attraction
Replace the equation...
See man ⬆️ corporate ladder = ⬆️ attraction

Man POV:
See woman ⬆️ Income ≠ ⬆️ Attraction
You get the rest...

I think you may not see the connection, perhaps because you think women climbing corporate ladder is not necessarily associated with money, but perhaps just a sense of achievement in general. In that case, you're right it's unfair, but society often works in collective thinking / stereotypes so there tends to be a skewed perception between men vs women in this context.

You were complaining about "double standards".The double standard exist because thats what society wants.

The vast majority of women consider a high income man as highly desirable. Hence a man who works hard and earn high income is lauded.

The other half of society, being men, doesnt really consider a high income woman as being extra desirable. Its probably at most "ok" and to some maybe even a red flag. Men will probably prefer nice boobs or other things vs high income.

just eat out!