happy or not i dont know la, but as an outsider, my advise is in order to get into relation or family with them, we gotta be cash rich / able to support them also (if u want them to stop work in TFC); and dont expect them can work as normal working hours also because those work in TFC is the type of person that dont like to obey the working rules or so.......but good also, u dodge the bullet....hahahaha.....so now u can put all ur effort in renovate ur house, buy some good furniture and enjoy it

Titanic jack and rose only 72 hours ma. Can forever remember le. hahahaha

Today i go temple pray and ask for guidance. In the end I get the guidance from god with very straightforward answer. Change courting partner. Guess I have to obey it.

Just find partner from ur own kind, if ur Chinese, find Malaysia Chinese partner, less cultural difference less headache, plus still in Malaysia can meet each other more frequently

If I manage to get a local GF. I believe Malaysia guy still prefer Malaysia GF but those girl don't want them.

good, is time to move on

Speaking from experience...

1st GF [Local] (2012-2020)
Long story short...
No communication
Too long in relationship
No more spark
Break up

2nd GF [Vietnamese] (2020-2021)
Heartbroken from 1st GF...
Then went out for drink meet my friend's GF which vietnamese.
Meet her little sister just came back from Vietnam before lockdown.
She was TFC girl... During covid lockdown we hang out abit due to nothing you can do anywhere.
Then spark happened then we got into relationship.
I went in casual but it got serious.
And I dont want my future partner to be in TFC forever so I sponsored her to be DJ roughly 10-20k...
Loyal, hard working person and very talented in DJ but ultimately didnt work out because she is those typical loud & slightly rude Vietnamese.
You probably can find her spinning at few bars in TREC KL and Kuchai Lama.
Money she earn from DJ she got give me back sometimes.

The reason why i break up is because:
1. Financial stress
2. Character not ngam together
3. She is too young at that time [20yo-2020]
4. Always fight

One day we fight, because I said I want to breakup. She then slap me then I said kthxbai.
PS: She still owes me RM 7k. Never return after breakup.

3rd GF [Vietnamese] (2021 - current)
Another TFC girl.
Very loyal & honest person, she will literary tell me everything. Like report to me.
Like this customer say to this and that to her.
I said you dont need to report to me I trust you.
Her requirement was that I need to support her 1K per month. Which I am able to do so at the time.
We upfront set this requirement before we started dating.
Broke up once this year because I need to start paying house loan and other financial commitment.
I cannot support myself and her at the same time.
Again due to financial stress I want to break up.

After 2 weeks, we got back together and she said the following:
1. You dont need to give me any money anymore. Just take care of me that is all that matters.
2. I understand your situation now and lets make this work.
3. If you need any money I can send you some back here for Vietnam.
4. After finding out I got money issues, she cook for me using her own money and when we go out she will reject nice places. She say go hawker stall enough.

Her character:
1. Loyal
2. Caring
3. Housewife type
4. Family dont ask for money (I have met her family at Vietnam before. Very friendly people.)
5. Can cook very well (Future can open restaurant in Malaysia type)
6. Mature Thinking (Same age as me 29 now)
7. Not typical vietnamese character
8. She is Vietnamese chinese (Plus point for me... Looks like local chinese when we go out)

After reading your story, my advice to you is...
You can find Vietnamese GF but not the one you are currently courting.
I know Vietnamese Girl inside out because I have been dating them for 3 years...
Trust me your current one red flags everywhere....

Things to look out for in Vietnamese Girl:
1. They will always expect the male to contribute some money. This is always the fact. It cannot and will not change just that they are more direct than our local girls... Local girls will ask for gifts and travel to Japan/Korea... "Eh today Valentine leh never buy anything one?" Technically you are spending the same compare local vs vietnamese.
2. Some are only gold digging but some is exceptionally loyal. Lucky both of mine is loyal. I know alot of vietnamese girl from my friends and my GF friends. They are actually quite alot that can pakai and not looking for gold. Find these girls.
3. Make sure they have a skill where they can move away from TFC after you both get serious. (This is my experience because if you cannot support a family you need to make sure she has a skillset that can find money. Both of mine have skillsets that can earn money without me)

Thanks bro for your valuable story. Could you elaborate why mine red flag everywhere? No offense, I honestly would like to know. I just afraid there is misunderstanding between me and her. She is caring, Housewife type, not sure can cook or not, Mature thinking and she look like chinese too.
She told me she always send a lot of money back to vietnam. She said she quit study on age 15, I did ask her would you want to learn some skill? Like barista for vietnam coffee because I hope she quit TFC too.

Your view into Vietnamese girls are insightful but I can't really agree with your views on local ladies. TBH I've met ladies that are quite self sufficient and don't expect money but they do expect attention and one such attention are probably what you term as valentine gifts etc. However, when comes time you actually share your difficulty, some would offer to help (and thus you see so much love scams happening). I still think there are good local girls out there and it's just a matter of whether one offer an image of financial stability. TBH only immature girls will elope with a pauper and many locals do think about future. If you cannot take care of yourself now, how would you take care of her and your children in the future?

Frankly speaking, I've gotten used to hearing all kinds of shit about Malaysian girls from this forum, so much I think I'm staying in an alternate timeline.

Considering how ktards actually take "no money, no honey" advice seriously, I'm not surprised they're attracting they very same type of ladies they hate. 🤷‍♀️

Re-reading back your post so here are some of my thought. Sorry if is abit long. I feel compelled to write a detail post so that everyone who are going through what I have been through understand what is like dating Vietnamese Girl.

1.
First of all, why it took so long to broke up with my first GF. Because it was puppy love and she is very well educated, good career path, stay home type and very quite type. I always keep thinking if I breakup where else can I find this kind of girl and with her as my partner we do not need to think of money cause together our salary is quite high. We will have a good life but there is no longer the connection there. This delayed our breakup roughly 2 years (wasted both of our time). We are basically roommate together. We can stay at the same room and dont talk for 1 week during lockdown.

2.
This is why now when I date I dont care about your background or what you do or where you from. As long we both know what we are doing and we are both happy that it is all that matters for me. I personally dont think is stupid to fall for TFC girls. Character is the number one thing I look for now in GF.

3.
No people, male or female, local or vietnamese with their right mind will randomly add anyone on wechat and just randomly get close with no objective in mind. My current GF also say, if I m not in a relationship with you right now, I m 24/7 on the phone texting all kinds of random male/customer to get close to them to potentially get some money. Not I say one ya... Their countrymate say one ya. This is just their MO. They are basically a sales person building connection but their product is companionship.

4.
You need to understand their number one priority is to secure enough money so that they have a secure future. If they do not have a secure future they do not have time to think about love. They come from proverty, money is always the first thing they think of first. You need to find out after she got this money, she want to do business here or Vietnam. My GF has been here for 11 years. She has already adapted her life here. She will never go back. She will not lari balik in other words. She hates vietnam lifestyle and vietnamese male lol... She probably have half mil RM stash somewhere. This is just my guess.

PS: They are alot of dumb local male in Malaysia. Don't be one. One day I go back home suddenly she is holding an iPad.... We sold the iPad for cash instead.

5.
If she truly your good friend, she wont ghost you unless she is busy hooking up another customer first. Me personally, anyone who ghost me I will ghost them back. Idgaf. If you are my friend you text me and I reply you and you ghost me. After 1 week of no interaction, I will not text back until you text me back. I value my time more than to constantly be needy and thinking what went wrong all the time.

6.
If you really did went one time at her workplace and you didnt hang and she ghost you. This is already the answer for you. If she truly treat you as friend or potential relationship match, SHE WILL NOT ASK YOU TO HANG. I would rather give the money to her directly. Anything you hang through the bar, the bar will charge 20-50%. Who in the right mind will ask their friend to waste money. For example, if you hang RM 100, lets say RM 50 go to her. If she really treat you as friend she will just say give me RM 50 dont hang here. OR "Dont hang la, just bring me eat something nice."

7.
Looks dont matter. What matters is how you treat them. I am bald too. Money only open the door, is your effort, the ability to draw the line and not being needy that matters. Girl do not like guys who are needy. The moment they sense you are needy they will run. If they smell you need them instead of they need you. You no longer have any value to them.

8.
I notice you are quite introvert. I was one. You need to really open up and learn from other extrovert. We introvert are very observant. Observe what extroverts do copy the good and delete the rest. Also, love yourself. If you dont love yourself you cannot love anyone else. If you love yourself you will in turn be more confident and that will lead to better relationship and more prospect will open up.

9.
If you have a Myvi and girls dont talk to you. This means that girl is too materialistic and that is not what you wanted as a life partner anyway. So why you want to think about this. I know people drive Myvi go work and daily driving but stay at bungolow with 2 porsche in the garage. This is really outdated way of thinking.

This post has been edited by JK-Rai: Jun 13 2023, 01:09 AM

Most local girl have higher expectation in terms of attention and they always think they are better than everyone.
Bonderline feminism I would call it.
They are more demanding in terms of "You are male this is your responsibility" thinking.
They always emotionally guilty trip you. I really hate this. They are not direct with their words.
I no longer have any interest in local girls.
At least my GF is not those type that need gifts for special occasion.
Just a simple wish or gesture is more than enough for her.
Eg. Massage her shoulder and etc.

Yes, not denying there still are good local girls but it is getting lesser and lesser.
Especially when our population are getting brain washed more and more from social media.
They are getting more and more westernized.

For example, you ask any local girl "Do you think you are better than vietnamese girls?" (Not TFC girl, just random vietnam/thai girl)
If they say yes, these are the girls that I will avoid.
Especially those simping western/korean people culture.
If local girls are truly kind hearted, they would try to understand why would TFC girls do these kind of jobs in the first place.
I have few local female friends that are ok with TFC girls and are quite good friend with my GF.
Their mindset is that this is their job and they are not stealing so what is the issue here?
These are the local that you want to find as a GF.

This post has been edited by JK-Rai: Jun 13 2023, 02:03 AM

Please don't take this negatively but you sounded as if you have some deep anger within you towards local girls. You have a good local GF and yet you still think most local girls are bad. In my opinion, any girls are entitled to sulk a little, speak about women's rights etc. I wouldn't see them as feminism as those are just opinions. Eventually it comes down to the dynamics between the two person. Does she understands you, can she detect issues you're facing and compensate (works both ways here but TBH up till today I've tough time reading women's mind) and are both of you willing to sacrifice for each other. Perhaps you mixed around more with ladies from rich families and thus you faced ladies with different mindset. Ladies with more humble families might not always be that "entitled" and definitely won't feel superior to Vietnamese ladies (take note that some ladies have worked in Vietnam and have see how superior Vietnamese ladies might have performed at work). You also mentioned that you have local friends that do not look down on TFC girls. Give MOST local girls some credits and not just be influenced by /k thinking Anyway, nice discussion topic

I dont have deep anger towards local.
Just my experience with the 1st one kinda make me lose faith with local.
I am still ok with being friends but I will think twice before going into serious relationship.
Maybe you are right is the social circle I am in that made me feel that way.
Or maybe i prefer girl from more kampung and humble mindset.
Vietnamese girl coming from poor background and working hard to have a better future and the ability to draw the line.
I really respect that.
Gods know how many sad story i hear from them.

Ok, if I understand correctly, TS did not spend a single RM0.01 on the Vietnamese girl and now is wondering why she never contacts him anymore?

Well, if that's correct, she failed to extract cash from you so there's no point in talking with you any further.

Myvi is not the issue for genuine gals... i got one friend driving old Proton Saga, and another driving Kancil.
The Kancil driver is over 35 yrs old i think.

Buy a car because you like, want it, or need it.. not to impress girls.

but but but... fastest car is Myvi, that's why it's the king

I been waiting for your reply. It's ok to be long because most importantly is detailed. On that day my wallet have only RM700. I did not expect need to hang RM1000 just to make her happy. I did tell her I fetch you home then I give you some cash because day before the day I met her, it was storm day (many police come sapu) and she doesn't have income and I afraid she doesnt have money to eat or use on necessity.
Since you have Vietnamese gf who work in TFC, may i know is that a must to go out with customer or let customer fetch home to gain more flower?

I am not bias to anyone here. I had courting a lot of local girls. I lost faith to local girl too. They just think they should deserve better. For example I going out with a friend of mine who is not so close. We went to a same wedding dinner and I sit beside her, as her friend I should show my gentleman like take some dishes to her because she quite short and very hard to reach. When I did it, her eyes just like stare at me and say no need. I did not know what i'm doing wrong. For those girl who I courting with, most of them will demand how much I should give them when we together? Walao, you are not my wife please. When I insist not giving then suddenly missing.
I prefer eat at home, and I don't mind I cook. But local girl seems prefer eat outside because boyfriend bayar ma.
Vietnamese girl on the other hand give me different feeling, a feeling that I feel someone need me and not because of my money.

Almost le... If she becareful a bit, took more time maybe I really kena. I don't mind she tell me she need money to study or buy food. But insist me to hang flower and not direct pass her the money I really cannot lar.
Why need to let boss earn commission? If she love me, she wont ask me do that. I know her period come, I buy some supplement to her, heat pad, food, etc. But these are the thing she doesn't need. What can i do?
I still hope we can be friend even I know her intention.

If look not good and with myvi, thats the issue. If look good, still have 50% chance
But girl think myvi is a cheap car ma. All my junior drive better car than me. But myvi damn reliable that's why I never want to change because cheap maintenance.

LMAO oh poor you... Let me try to decipher this... You probably did one of these:
- took something she dislikes (in case you're not aware, not everyone likes pork, not everyone likes veggies etc. Etc...)
- took wrong part of a chicken
- took fish along with the bones
- she's already full
- she has serious inferiority complex with her height(?!?!)

Not saying your fault, cuz the girl could've easily said what she wants and everyone's happy. But yeah, immature ones would expect you to read their minds and get upset without explaining anything when you don't meet expectations. I'm sorry that happened to you.

yo....

back to ts topic

tfc or any bar/pub worker espisially foreign girl JUST NO man.....u r asking for headache.....imagine if u really merid....more headache about paper work at immgresin side.....they come here looking for money 1st.....
maybe u r the type that fall inlove easylly just like me,but downside also come with upside and that is will get bored fast too...
maybe we should hangout share experince

btw what age r u in now?

and if u keep looking for the one...its hard to get the 1.......just stop finding and let it come as in fate

This post has been edited by poco loco: Jun 14 2023, 04:14 AM