Goodluck buddy. I felt that way too.

Hopefully you're doing okay.

I'm really nothing like Captain America. A lot of people think I'm a good guy like I dont drink smoke party, own a business that helps other, bought own house but the fact is I'm all broken inside. Then I do shit like that.
Sigh.

But yeah, all of you guys more or less have been trying to help me to move forward. A lot of kind soul here. I owe it to you guys to get better.

Did she find out and chose to stick with you? Or she never did?

But anyway what you did was admirable. How you turn everything around.

Yeah but one day at a time. Just keep telling myself I will survive today and I survived today. Then tomorrow repeat again.

Sadly, my house no milo. My house got nothing except for water. I have a house, not a home. But luckily got hot shower.

Thank you bro. You really here for me damn. You are like the brother I never had.

Thank you buddy!

Why did you feel this way as well? What happened if you dont mind to share?

Damn I though I was reading about myself at the first parts. Especially with the strict dad and him passing away early due to cancer. Also with the Christianity and all.

Read all through and I felt compassion towards you. Do continue to pray for the better and don't give up in whatever your circumstances maybe now.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7.

Also if haven't watch this yet, do give it a shot. It's about the life of Job. That despite all his suffering and misery, he remained faithful (thought he did almost give up) (also his suffering and misery was allowed by God). https://youtu.be/GswSg2ohqmA

Pray for the best and God bless you. Even if you think you are alone, God is still with you.

Also if you realise that you've sinned. Great for the realization. As Jesus said to the adulterous woman in John 8:11, "Go and sin no more."

This post has been edited by Imagination *-*: Nov 11 2019, 11:47 PM

Hey! Thanks for your kind word and encouragement.

A lot of similarities between us. But nothing to be proud of cause its not good thing. Hope you are doing better than I am. Yeap, prayer is the best I can do for now. Actually it should be the first thing I need to do but very often we put it the only thing we can do when we are up against the wall.

She did find out. And she did leave for a moment. I had to overcome my own stupidity and lust. I became a better person to show her that I can change. Slowly, it took some time. But we are now back together.

You can do it too. You just have to believe in yourself. Change your mind. You are in control. You have to keep repeating that to yourself. Your mind is under your control.

You can do whatever you want. Just keep being positive. Overcome your fear. Let the guilt turn you into a better person.

4am type 1 page of long story.

Con9Lan7cbFirm this is real. Either that or TS really has nothing better to do in life.

You're actually a testimonial that people can get back together again after they got separated. How long did she leave?

This is real and yeah, for now nothing better to do in life.

Haha. That's very nice of you to say that. Thank you. Try to get milo or chocolate next time, sometimes a warm drink helps to endure those long nights.

Try to get some rest. Tomorrow is a new day for you to get better again.

Yeah trying to just pass 1 day at a time.

You sleep very late too bro. Not working tomorrow?

Good to know Bro. For me, I accidentally slept late today. Yes I am working tomorrow but I'll be fine with coffee. Haha.

Sometimes feel like damn useless. Already so old at 31 still need to go through this and need people to help me some more.

Damn.

Well, to me everybody experience different things at different stages of life, and each experience is unique to the one who experienced them. Most people tend to have a common expectation of what is suppose to happen at which stage of life, but life is always full of surprises, right?

Not sure whether you got try playing some music or not.. But some soothing music like Canon in D may help adjust your mood a little. If you are not into music, then white noise such as sound of rain or the rain forest may help put your mind at ease. Worth a try.

This post has been edited by V429: Nov 12 2019, 03:01 AM

Double post

This post has been edited by V429: Nov 12 2019, 02:56 AM

Gonna try to sleep now. Yeah I'm trying to listen to some instrumental worship song while sleeping. It does help to ease the anxiety but I still wake up feeling worried. At least can get a couple hours of sleep.

You too rest well okay.

about half a year. went back to stay at her parents. it was a real shitty time. kena condemn by both family and friends. it's worse than getting no support.

kena put down by your own family, kena boycott by friends. the feeling is way way worse.

but i just say fuck it, i'm gonna show them i am better than this. i can do better. there is nothing that i cannot overcome.

whatever shit you can throw at me, i will never turn my back and run. i will fight you head on.

so there's that... haha

Bodo TS punya. Came here expose all his family's shortcomings, reveal how hypocritical his church gf is, see a comment criticising his family members, telling him how hypocriticial his gf and church is, butthurt and delete and report. If you cannot handle people making viewpoints about your close ones, don't come and write all their bad deeds. Damn bodo