no need buy already. too poor

love - when u have a pair of ring for each of u
lust - when u couldnt care about rings
marriage - when u accidentally throw away both ur rings

no offence, just kidding around......

love - when u buy the perfect ring for each other
lust - when u put your thing into her ring..
marriage - u wonder when will the bell ring....

Wife's Final Words


Jake was watching vigilantly at his dying wife's side. ''Sleep now, its all right,'' he told her.

But she kept trying to sit up and said, ''Honey, I really need to tell you something.''

Finally Jake let her get it off her chest.

''Jake, honey, I need to tell you something before I die. During the last two months, I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father.''

''Don't worry about it,'' Jake said, ''I already know. Why do you think I poisoned you?''

No Ordinary Watch


A rather confident man enters a bar and sits next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.

Noticing this, the woman asks, "Is your date running late?"

"No," the man replies. "I just purchased this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it."

Intrigued by his comment, the woman inquires, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"

"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.

"Really? What's it telling you now?" she asks.

"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties," he replies.

Giggling, she says, "Well, it must be broken then because I am definitely wearing panties."

"Damn thing must be an hour fast," he replies, tapping on the watch face.

lolx.....

lol!hillarious...

Home Ahead of Schedule


Although scheduled for all-night duty at the station, a police officer was relieved of duty early and arrived home at 3AM, a few hours ahead of schedule.

Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, quietly crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed when his sleepy wife sat up and said, "Sweetheart, I have a horrible headache. Would you mind getting me some aspirin from the all-night drug store?"

"Sure, honey," he replied. Feeling his way across the room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store.

When he entered, the pharmacist looked up in surprise and asked, "Hey, aren't you Office Fields?"

"Yes, I am," replied the officer.

"Then why are you wearing the Fire Chief's uniform?" the druggist asked.

haha...wife berlaku curang with fire chief.....

I think i'm the only one who have the record of throwing valuable things when poor.

LOOK FOR THINGS BEFORE U THROW THEM!

This post has been edited by aLittleMisfit: Jun 11 2007, 11:13 AM

learn from it loh...no choice.

start a donation, since you already got some fans here.

Promises Fulfilled


A woman who recently lost her husband had him cremated and brought his ashes home with her. Picking up his urn, she opened it and spread his ashes out over a table. Tracing her finger through his ashes, she began to talk to him.

"Dear, remember that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money."

"Sweetheart, remember that new car you promised me? Well, I also bought that with the insurance money."

"And you know that diamond and sapphire necklace you promised me? I bought that too, with the insurance money."

Still tracing her finger through the ashes, she continued, "Darling, remember that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes ... "

Petty Argument


A husband and wife were having a petty argument and both were unwilling to admit they might be in the wrong.

In an attempt to reconcile, the wife said, "I'll admit I'm wrong, if you'll admit I'm right."

The husband agreed and, being a gentleman, insisted she go first.

"I'm wrong," the wife said.

"You're right!" the husband replied, with a twinkle in his eye.

Good one....if onli all girls r like tat

Little Girl's First Wedding


Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl
whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in
white?"

"Because white is the color of happiness and today is the
happiest day of her life," her mother tried to explain,
keeping it simple.

The child thought about this for a moment, then said, "So,
why's the groom wearing black?"

something that i found somewhr:


Before the marriage:


He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Yes!

She: Will you hit me?

He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.


Now after the marriage you can read it from below .....upwards !

lol...
good 1

A Woman's Logic


Ralph awoke one day to realize that his member had inexplicably been growing larger and staying erect longer with each passing day. He was delighted, as was his wife. But after several weeks, his sex organ had grown to nearly 20 inches and Ralph became quite concerned. He was having problems dressing and even walking. So, he and his wife went to see a prominent urologist. After an initial examination, the doctor explained that Ralph's condition could be fixed through corrective surgery. "How long will Ralph be on crutches?" the wife asked anxiously. "Crutches? Why would he need crutches?" responded the surprised doctor. "Well," said the wife, "you are planning on lengthening Ralph's legs, aren't you?"

Desert Island Hijinx


A man and his wife are stranded on a desert island. The wife begins to lose interest in her husband and wishes on a star that she could find another man. The next day a man is washed on shore. He is very hansom and he is consumed by lust for the wife. The husband is pleased to have another man to help with work around the island. The stranger and wife, falling in love with one another, wanted to have mad passionate sex on the beach, so he thinks of a plan

Wanting to be safe from wildlife on the island, they decide to build a shelter high up in the trees. The stranger worked on the roof while the husband and wife worked down on the beach. Periodically the stranger would yell to them from the tree house, ''Hey! No having sex! Get back to work!''

At this, the couple would yell back, ''We're not having sex!''

This happened several times while he worked on the roof of the shelter, and when his turn was over, the husband took over. With that, the stranger made love to the wife on the beach.

The husband, watching, exclaimed, ''Wow, it really does look like they're having sex from up here!'''