Newton in a romantic mood

  Universal law
"Love can neither be created nor destroyed,it can only be transferred from one girlfriend to another with some loss of money"

  First law
"A boy in love with a girl will continue to do so unless an external agent{brother or father of girl] comes into play and breaks the boy's legs".

  Second law

"The rate of change of love of a girl is directly proportional to the bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same as the increase or decrease of the bank balance".

  Third law
"The force applied when proposing a girl is equal and opposite to the force the girl applies when slapping the boy".

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Added on March 28, 2008, 6:25 pmWife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no

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Added on March 28, 2008, 6:26 pmPeter : Imagine, in a closed room , how can you escape if it caught fire?
Michelle : Simple, stop imagining.

Older Version

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the
summer away.

Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

Modern Version

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The Grasshopper thinks the Ant ' s a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

TV1, TV2 & TV3 show up to ! provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

The majority of the Malaysian Parliment stunned by the sharp contrast.  How can this be that this poor Grasshopper allowed suffering so?

Khairy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant ' s house .

Nazri goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding that Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

MOst of the related people criticizes the Malaysia Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.

The local news paper & the Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .

Deputy minister immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants and
Grasshoppers.

Hishammudin makes 'More Special Reservation ' for Grasshoppers in Educational Institutions & in Government Services.

The Ant; fined for failing to comply with 30% sharing and having nothing
left to pay his retroactive taxes; its home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by maju ---------.

Prime Minister announces to the whole Malaysia that this is part of the NEP and all have to respect, no question ask and have to follow it.

Many years later

The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company. 100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in Malaysia because of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding the Grasshoppers, Malaysia is still a developing country!!!

All bcos the ANTS are still doing their work.............................

Sitting Swimmingly...

Three guys enter a special swimming contest whereby each contestant is born disabled. The first has no arms. The second hasno legs and the third has no body, just a head.

The prospect of the race was a bit ridiculous, but the three had all trained and such a contest was historic, so many people gathered to watch.

They all line up, the whistle blows and "splash" they're all in the pool.

The guy with no arms takes the lead instantly, but the guy with no legs is closing fast. The head of course sank straight to the bottom.

Ten lengths later and the guy with no legs finishes first. Everybody applauds, (except the guy with no arms, of course.)

The guy with no legs can still see bubbles coming from the bottom of the pool, so he decides, with all good sportsmanship, to dive down to the bottom of the pool to rescue his fellow competitor. He picks up the head, swims back up to the surface and places the head at the side of the pool, where upon the head starts coughing and sputtering.

Eventually the head catches his breath. He takes a moment and then begins to fume. His face red and steaming, he turns to the crowd and shouts:

"Three years I've spent learning to swim with my ears, then two minutes before the whistle, some jerk puts a swimming cap on me!"