hubby oso says i failed as DIL
i dont give a damn, i have a mind of my own and my own opinions and own rights

if they cannot accept the fact that i am smart & independent, then they failed

This post has been edited by qarezma: Apr 27 2011, 06:14 PM

better failed DIL rather than becoming a failed mother. like me, i'm a lousy mother. always forgetting to do things, like brushing my daughter's teeth before she sleep. but i'm trying my best and will try to learn from mistakes.

phythia, i think so...

ijnek, he told me a dil should prepare meals n take k of household while taking k of bb if we were to live in the past... now i only take k of bb n sweep n mop the floor... so i should consider as fortunate... this is where i fail... sigh... i just tahan lo... swallow everything... coz wat can i do? leave the house? can't b too impulsive rite? but everytime we'll end up in heated arguement... sigh...

qarezma, gimme 5~!

lunalovegood, i think i oso failed as a mum... bb have fallen abt 5 times to the floor under my care... i feel soooo sad... even hb scolded me for that... i cried so hard that bb cried together wif me...

do not think of yourself as failed mother, we were not born as mothers, we became one. The moral is to learn and improve and hv the determination to do the best all the time.... i know i too felt regret at times when my kid fell sick, then tell my mother and she tells me it is not my mistake, important is we are thr to rectify and take care of them when they need us.

haiz.. some ppl still expect DIL to come and take care of the IL's family after getting married.. even though the ILs are working, and have kids above 25yrs of age.. WTF.. i told hubby, they are old enough to make decisions, we will guide them, but not 'tk care' as in head the family.. why should we take over FIL's role as the head of the family, anyway? as if i dont hv enough problems and daily challenges in my hand already...

see now still stuck in the office and it sucks! i wanna go home!

This post has been edited by qarezma: Apr 27 2011, 06:51 PM

qarezma, y u're stuck? complain complain~! mayb some traditional ones will expect DIL to take over MIL's job but MIL is still the head of household... something like that... like a joke suggest...

teacher : how old is ur dad?
boy : 8 yrs old
teacher : y?
boy : he became a dad when i was born

about the oats

Quaker-oats segera will do??

same thing happen to my daughter, huhu. but my husband cant scold me, because it also happened once when she was under his care, so he cant scold me. thankfully i've got myself a super strong baby here, everytime she fell, she will cry for a few minutes, and then go back to sleep. i guess she have to be strong, having a mom like me. pity her.

This post has been edited by lunalovegood: Apr 27 2011, 07:41 PM

My son has fallen so many times. I used to feel like a bad mom buy soon enough I realised that there are times that I can't always try to be perfect in taking care of my son but I'll give my best. Falling down is part and parcel of both parents and child when the child is growing up.

Once when my son fell off the bed...I checked online to find out what symptoms that I should look out for. I was damn kao worried that he may be injured or something. The site did give the list of symptoms but at the same time said that babies aren't that fragile too.

Yea.. I accidentally trimmed my baby's skin together with her nails... Brave girl.. She didn't cry although it was bleeding.

And she also knocked her head on the coffee table corner when I leave her unattended on a thin mattress. Forgotten that she can turn pretty well now.

Learnt from my mistake to put her away from obstruction when she is in action...

Hahaha nice one there! i was stuck at work yday till 7pm, padahal i had plans to go out for dinner with hubby and mom... sedih right...

yeaa so they are pretty traditional and expect me and hubby (hubby is eldest in family) to become head of family in decision making... we dont stay with them, but visit them every 2 weeks once, we are not there to take ownership, and frankly, i dont feel nice taking over head of family from them cos they are still young (<60) and working and active and all... but due to all this hubby says i am a failed DIL.. he doesnt understand my reasoning, whatever.. he knows i dont get along well with his family so whatever la...

Quaker oats, not advisable cos i think the oats is more processed than baby oats

As for having accidents as a mother.. there are plenty...
1) showing my baby his album, and accidently scratched his cheek with the sharp edge, had an ugly scar for a few days
2) Accidently stepped on baby's hand.. he was crawling behind me and i didnt notice him there
3) Let baby play with kitchen cabinet doors, and he had a fall, hit his gum on the cabinet and had slight bleeding
4) While snapping on the cloth diaper, i didnt realise i nearly snapped with his skin in between.. but my boy is a brave one, he doesnt cry for vaccination japs, so this one he just let out a short cry and all was ok...

and you wont believe, most happened when i was at home with baby (either on leave or MC).. i thought to myself, if i didnt stay home, i might have avoided these accidents.. then again.. it was nice being home alone with him... in these occasions, i did feel so guilty and hated myself... especially when i see the scar of (1), but as it went away, my guilt did too...

This post has been edited by qarezma: Apr 28 2011, 09:26 AM

doraemon, i dun think u can give normal adults oats to babies coz they have this beta gluten... i dunno wat it is but i remember that babies shouldn't take this beta gluten... buy oats for baby or organic oats i think... mayb...

lunalovegood, sbux, phythia, ya my boy oso just cry a while then stop n smile back... even if i accidently cut his skin when trimming his nails... injection oso the same... i guess babies r actually stronger than i tot...

qarezma, kesian... 7pm... make face or noise la... like sigh sigh sigh... or keep looking at the clock do u keep arguing wif ur hb? then again, u guys dun live wif ur inlaws... it's always feel nice to have bb next to me btw u've got ur breast pump yet?

This post has been edited by nicKit: Apr 28 2011, 01:04 PM

haha we argue when we are on the way to ILs or at ILs... partly cos he doesnt like my attitude with them... other times we are ok... as u say, we dont stay wit ILs, so got more chance to avoid the issues la...

didnt buy the BP yet.. after reading you guy's discussion and all, i tink better i latch on first and establish supply... will buy pump during maternity leave... maybe i will get the ameda electronic one (same as urs rite)... economical la

qarezma, mine's spectra 3... wished i could c ameda demo units but they dun have it here... remember if u have any problem or u feel it's hard dun give up~! u've been here n u've read it all... u know wat u're up against so this time gambateh o~!

oopss.. my bad... i want to consider spectra3 or ameda.. lets see la..
yes i have read quite abit and feeling more confident this time!

nonono...
I mean oats for myself to increase the supply la...

Oats segera can?

qarezma, i heard there's a new model of spectra... if u got time drop by fabulous mum n ask for demo unit... i tried the spectra3 there b4 i bought it

doraemon, ooo... u can take instant oats... i oso take... but now kinda lazy... so when i lazy i take soy milk... some say oats work some say oatmilk... i oso dunno so i try to get watever i can n drink them... soy milk, oats, water, radish... watever they say helps

This post has been edited by nicKit: May 4 2011, 10:54 AM

my boy still bf every 2-3 hrs... is it normal? i still need to wake up abt 4 times at nite from his sleep 8pm to 8am...

I think it's pretty normal. My son was at about the same schedule as yours. Even, now when he's closing to 2 yo..he still wakes up at about 11pm for 1 feed and few other times during the nights for his dream feed (don't know what time as i'm half asleep..and all he does is pull my t-shirt up and climb on me).

In fact..i got so used to this dream feed schedule and i don't know what i would do once he's totally weaned off.

phythia, mayb once he's weaned, u'll b half awake thinking it's his dream feed whereas he's already weaned... or u dream of him feeding j/k

hehehehe...yeah..you may be right..

Nowadays, when i get home, i don't make it a point to bf him. I'll wait for his to ask for it..which is usually about 1-2 hours after i reach home. I am trying to go towards him..weaning off by himself rather than me stopping dramatically. However, now..my mom don't think so...she said to put asam jawa thingy..unto my nipple so that he doesn't want my breast. As usual..i just put in one ear..and take out from the other ear .