Just do what you want to do TS.. I really think that this is the time for you to do what you want to do. No more thinking, no more asking for opinions, just do what you feel like doing. Love is about instincts and a lot of emotions you see

And guys, please stop criticizing him already. TS will do what ever he want, we aren't in a place to call him bad names or whatever, he is just one once-busy-doctor who now found out what he had been missing.

haiz such a sad story, remember that we work for our life, n not live to work, wht r u working for if u dun a life? get her back if u really love her.

This post has been edited by cloudaeris: Nov 30 2009, 02:03 PM

I'll promise her to be by her side! This is the most bitter lesson that I have got in this life. For eight years, I never try to understand her predicament.

During my three years in UK, if she is materialistic, she should have got a good BF, but she endured RM800 salary per month while waiting for me to get back. Putting myself in her shoe, I could never know what I would do. Then, I changed her life drastically without understanding her plight. Back then, I was so egoistic that her parent treated me like VIP at her home, smile and served me good food. Now, I would try to understand what she wants.

She is now teaching in the old music again. I'll make sure she's happy, rather than change her job or whatsoever.

winner,

there're probably too many replies for you to read. perhaps, if you happened to read my post, let me give you a suggestion.

reading all your posts, i realize one thing, that you always talk about how you feel, but not how she feel. it clearly shows that, you don't even know how she feels. and this, alone, shows that you don't have any love for her. not because you don't love her, it's because you don't even know what is love.

love is very simple. it takes a heart, to know another heart. you never try to understand her, that's your mistake.

I seldom understand her because I thought MY GOAL to get PhD and EFFORT to get into her into my family, PAY for her COSMETIC, DRESS, FACIAL, teach her GOLF, all these are OUR GOAL. But now I realize she had sacrificed herself too much.

Yes, I confess I don't know What Women And Girls Want, yet I never listen. I'll listen to her the next time.

tell me, what you cannot buy even if you're as rich as the richest man in the world?

"time"

give her time, that's all she want. not give her "her time", give her "your time". she gave hers, but you never give her any...

but then, that's already the past. what you need to do is, to give your future gf/wife more time. money is a must for living, and time is a must for love. not to say money is not important, you just have to balance that out.

This post has been edited by little ice: Nov 30 2009, 02:07 PM

all i want to say is, if u really love her, just love her for who she is.. if not, thats not love.. there are no perfect human in this humble God earth,dude.. and its very hard to find a girl who are willing to wait for u 8~9years with such attention u given to her.. i wouldnt let her go if i were u,dude..

Love is not to forget but to forgive,
not to see but to understand,
not to hear but to listen,
not to let go but to HOLD ON !!!!

Don't ever leave the one you love for the one you like,
because the one you like will leave you for the one they love.

OK. I'll put her at the first priority.

I'll change myself to be a normal person.

All this while, I have only accustomed to big car, big house, giving her high end dinners, hotel rooms, roses, diamonds, credit cards, golf club membership... I think she must be longing for simple life, and if this is true, I'll make sure I won't behave in an arrogant manner.

Guys and gals, I'm changing for her, I love her!

All the best to you.

and i'd like to add that, you cannot force her to go back to your side, by telling her "i will listen to you this time, please come back".

she will never go back to you. that is because she will never convinced by "talk only". if you truely want her back, visit her often, go out for lunch/dinner with her often. you'll never know how happy she is, e.g. when you wait her for 1 hour (when she's teaching), just to hang out with her for a simple dinner yes, it means you don't need to spend $$$$ for a big and luxurious dinner, as simple as bak kut teh or wantan mee is plenty. moreover, if you don't spend big on her, she'll even think that you're willing to "lower your rank", and willing to live in her world.

the point is, you're a gentleman, if you want to ask something from a girl, give her something first.

still don't understand? chase her back!

This post has been edited by little ice: Nov 30 2009, 02:16 PM

OK.

The mantra is "Listen to her, spend more time with what she wants to do, understand what she likes to eat and do, and always put myself in her shoes, understand her emotionally"

that's more than enough. it's the root point of being understanding, that is so simple yet so many people not able to catch the point.

anyway all the best chasing her back!

erm TS i dont think it has anything to do with the hotel rooms or facial stuffs, its more to urself so perhaps u could be that guy who she fell in love with?

it doesn't hurt to pamper her, but what is more important is you should listen to her now, love her as much as she loves u, treat her right.

ur appearance, even if u change to become ah pek but u still duno how to listen to her, treat her nicely, also no use, so get this right.

u don't have to change ur appearance or whatever, but change to be someone more caring and loving instead.

Stylish, I hope you won't cry to hear about my effort to change myself this time. I change myself just for her! I hope you could see the changes inside me, from "Smart guy is intimidating", "Life's too busy" to this threat.

I'm dumb. I'm so dumb that I only try to solve this problem about 1 year after break up. It's good to know she remains single. I just hope she could accept me, though anyone makes better BF than me. Useless me.

u did said she live in a OLD double storey house ... u did said she is really amazed when she saw ur dad's house ... u did said she earn a mere rm800 ...

u oso said u got a camry ( btw i think camry so so nia ) , a 20k club membership , thousands on dresses , facials bla bla bla ... high class clients who laugh at ppl , chinaman dad who thinks teaching music r for retards ...

and after all this , u stil couldnt figure the real problem ... its not tht u rent a waja n go empty handed tht she wans ... u really idiot la ... if u could provide a better life for her its better of coz la ... who wans their other half to b poor ....

the problem is priority , how important she is to u ... u r neglecting her behind everything in ur life , even ur client's dog eye is rank higher than her feeling ...

The mantra isn't "Listen to her, spend more time with what she wants to do, understand what she likes to eat and do, and always put myself in her shoes, understand her emotionally"

its a 2-way comm , if u force urself doin tht , some day later u will feel stressed n frustrated .... since u stil dun understand how the 2 of u can b together happily .... pls dun go torture her again ... its better for both of u to b separated ....

ok i noe chinese got saying not good to separate ppl ... but this "kwan kiok zhai" really too much ... cant help

Haish, why are you still even here man. You should be getting her NOW NOW NOW . All the best with your effort .

Anyway, I'll try to avoid making myself to look like me the past. Rather than making myself look arrogant and smart in expensive suit and leather shoes, I'll dress like her brothers. And, diamonds and rose would be a no-no.

Stupid me, after 8 years, I never know which was her primary, secondary school and favourite places, I would have explored her childhood with her.

you are so rich and yet selfish.. money cant buy everything.. after 8 years.. you still havent make the 1st move.. no wonder she is trying hard to seduce you.. she is feeling INSECURE you dumbo !

regarding seducing, Winner you probably never notice one thing - she want commitment. and commitment means she want your time, your entire life.