what is your opinion of using guys money when the guy is not working and just studying?

i have a best fren..she is just graduate from diploma..and her bf doing degree and not working..i invited her to join me for 6 days part time job..1stly she wanted and her bf told her..he will gives her $$ to spend every month and the guy is not rich also..i told my frens for my opinion its not good to use bf's money coz come to the end the $$ is from the guys parents..n he is not working will burden him..and ppl will gossip..(if the bf's parents finds out!)

i mean if use his $$ for movies and stuff its alright..but use it for montly allowance? will u all "sampai hati" to use it?

This post has been edited by feyhime: May 30 2008, 11:46 AM

Thread Approved.

However everyone posting here will be heavily moderated in accordance to the new rule.

haha i now a guy who give allowance to gf .. desperate guy end up get nothign

and the girl ... a b****

The guy is just tak sampai hati see his gf go work part time la.. so he gives her monthly allowance. Use or not is up to the girl, but she must find a job and support herself as soon as possible. Time has changed, gender equality. Our money is not easy to earn too, and we have family to support, house and car loan to pay etc.

There's no right nor wrong...Its just personal preferences.

If the girl doesnt mind to take money from her bf, and her bf willingly give her money to use then whats wrong about that?

U cant satisfy everyone u know?
If u say the girl is a biatch coz not working and use bf money, another person can say the guy is a loser cant afford to spend money on his gf if he let her gf work.
This goes the same for married couple.

Either way, u cant satisfy everybody...
The only thing is to choose what is the best comfortable choice to you.

people say what is up to them...is thier mouth..
the only thing is what u know,what are you suppose to do..

for me?i will eventually lend her $$$ when she needs..
if she is mature enought,she is not willing to wan your money to spend on them..

I dont know about other religion, but as a muslim, to me , it is the responsibility of the girl's father to support the girl before she is married, but after she marries, it is the responsibility of the husband.

So in reference to your question, my personal opinion, it is not wrong or right to accept when you are still courting. But for me, I will not take it, as I prefer to be independent. But if he will be offended if yuo dont take the money, or maybe to jaga his hati, you can take the money but save for your future together. And work at the same time, to earn your money to support yourself.

just my 2 cents worth..

I will not take it. I think it's so wrong to do that esp to someone you love. Poeple need to live within their means and make and spend their own money !

This post has been edited by Cas: May 30 2008, 01:38 PM

yeah, and he's still unemployed for gods sake. if any guy who insist of giving his gf $$$, while he himself is still studying and not working, and he will be angry if she rejects it, means he's egoistic and not prudent at all. I bet all of you girls would prefer he kept that $$ of his, or find some way to utilise it , for the sake of both their future.

i think the guy dont want her to work because they are spending less time together becos of that. maybe.

what rule is that? One day one of them sure have to work.

Maybe the BF parent loaded???

yeah but until that time comes, there is possible of selfish in a way, and duwan her to work for now...

for me...im not dare 2 use ya..even ppl parent's money oso earn it by hard..
for buying stuff..except bday present or valentine days lo...
if normaly go shopping...not quite gud lah..4 a guy who is not so rich..yet still studying...but seen tat...dis is oso consider as a couple probelm lah..
let them communicate themselves...coz thr's some guys realy wanna pay 4 their gf...dun wan their gf pay 4 it...rite ???

gee, i don't even allow my bf to pay for me when we got out dating.
i don't like to "owe" anyone anything.
especially since he's not working. don't take the money its not his to give.
but of course, depends on the girl's opinion lah.
lots of my friends treat their bf like atms which i think is very mean. =X

well... for me, wat me and my gf usually do is that we sometimes split 50-50.. wat i mean is that, when we go out (dating), i usually pay for the food, and she pays for the movie, or something like... and sometimes, if im short of $$, she support me and if she is short of $$, i'll support her, if i have any $$ left. it all depends on how you work out with your partner.. but i dont know. thats how i do it.

I do not have any problems of gals using guys money, if and only if the guy can really afford it.

Wat i see here, is the bf is egoistic. He refuse to let her gf work most probably he do not wan ppl to say that he cannot support his gf & his gf hv to work. This is all about 'face'...which is ridiculous. Worst thing is the guy can't even support himself & have to use his parents' money to support himself & his gf. This is definitely stupid & chauvinist idea.

Definitely I think it will be better for the gal can go out & earn some $$ & experience instead of rotting at home or shopping all day round... This make the gal look useless & materialistic. Able to support yourself without depending on others r good

Guys like to give and Girls like to take, DONT mess with the mother nature.

i pay everything for my gf, but dislike it when she accepts as if im a robot with no feelings.. i mean, i dont mind paying but i just wanna witness some keberatan or guilt expression on her face when i do so.. it prooves that she still cares for me like when buying movie ticket she will not hesitate to take out her purse and pass me the note, although ill still belanja her

instead of thick skinned gals who leech completely without any remorse and then dump her bf

vey 99:
they are spending their time together everyday...coz toldya the gal is not working n the guy studying..i just felt like its not very good to use ppl's money coz he also not working..

hmchan911:
their family is just moderate only the financial..

aimanida:
i strongly agree with u...the best is to split 50-50 so that money issue wont appear next time

kingkong81:
true lah what u said..he memang wan FACE type..that y he dont let the gal to work altough that part time is only a 6 days job..what type of guys is that?

well like a quote from Meet Joe Black, "what's wrong with taking care of a woman? she takes care of you."

monthly allowance??erm..my mum say if they willing 2 pay..den jus take it hahaha!!but i think ur fren shouldnt depend on the bf..sumore the guy is not rich s u say...ur fren can work n gain working experience 2..i regreted that i din work n now i dun have working experience compare 2 my frens..i oni work 1day at pc fair..den i sick whole week...guess i need 2 find a rich husband...hahahaha!!!

If my boyfriend's money is his money, I'm fine. If it's his parents, I don't allow it.

yup, i agree with this.
if its not his, then its not his to give.
only when he starts working den he should start giving her money.

Allowance? if my bf is working n he is able to manage all things or high salary until got extra money then i accept it but if he is still studying n getting money from his parents, me won't accept his money.. i don't want burden his financial part since i also manage to cover up myself, wat for need bf's allowance? if his parents found out tat they give money to their son, n their son spend those money on gf, sure give bad impression to tat girl.

Like me n my bf now also studying in college, when we hang out have meal, sometimes he pays sometimes i pay, it's depends...
bout movies usually he pays 1.. both of us also got vehicles, we also take turn to drive either his or my car to go out, not always use his car..
since both of us also getting money from our parents, so, when i go out shopping with him, i usually didn't asked him buy things for me, i pay it by myself, except those celebrations like birthday, aniversary, valentine..those days, he usually treat me nice meal n buy those gift which i love it..
then of cause, im love to accept it

This post has been edited by @nN: Jun 5 2008, 12:44 PM

I wouldn't accept an allowance from my boyfriend even if he's working. That's not for him to give. He's only allowed to buy me meals, but we take turns buying each other meals anyway.

haha aslong as you can be creative in your recompensation I couldnt care how much of my money you spend

wah, so good la bf can give allowance though not married yet! i wish can get those 'kind' bf too...

of course take it la, why want to reject? haha, if not u use money buy stuff for him, sure he love you more..

gals... you all should learn from this gal. this is the best answer. Too bad it is not Yahoo ANswer otherwise i sure vote you the best answer.

spunk... u got bf liau ar? sad lo.. otherwise sure i tackle u.

This post has been edited by SadGuy2: Jun 10 2008, 02:03 PM

we could always just be friends, y'know? lol

i used to give 30% of my salary to my ex-gf last time every month, put in share a/c... now shes gone to another bf with the money

---

Added on June 11, 2008, 8:55 pmnot to mention used my year bonus to pay for her car downpayment

This post has been edited by PureGeek: Jun 11 2008, 08:55 PM

Wow you've been played hard.

In the end it really depends on different people's opinion and view. This is a very subjective matter.

Haha yeah my ex would usually pay for me when I pay but I always slip back the money that he paid for me into his bag/pocket when he isnt paying attention =D

but seriously i didnt mind about that, coz that time real love

---

Added on June 11, 2008, 9:29 pmactually now i feel uneasy coz theres no person i can give my money to, and its flooding my bank a/c

This post has been edited by PureGeek: Jun 11 2008, 09:34 PM

hmm i think if that guy no working better is dun use lo, if work then can spend as much as can

true true..aree so much with spunkberry
TS u two not married then what for he give allowance rite?if during breakup,he ask for the money with interest then how?plus u sorta supporting him thru his edu?

OMG r u bragging that u earn alot that's y money flooding bank a/c??give the excess to ur parents ler?or buy a house with themoney,then u''ll have not enough to spend.

I'm always uncomfortable when taking money from my bf... Even if he belanja... Call me old fashion, but I always feel that I deserve that money only after we're married

yeah...me too...hahah

PureGreek: then put downpayment or FD lor...can get interest...if not then give me....muahahahahahaha..,..jkjkjk

i prefer earn and spend my own money. important is not to grow too dependent on partners financial

Like old ppl says.... NO PAIN NO GAIN. so now u PAY TO LEARN huh?

well it will never be to late to change now. You can of course spend for your loves one. but filter it which one can and which one cannot until you marry her.

There's always a catch. If your bf give you monthly allowance for sure he will want something in return. Guys are very cunning...

You know you girls shouldn't really take money from someone who're not working ... They've got no income except the pocket money that they get from their parents which is some hard earned money. Whats more ? When break up then you get some money issue ... Treating GFs on food/movie ticket is not much of a big deal ... But buying clothes and ladies stuff ... you know.

everyone to their own agenda,

there is no angel, it is just a matter of who is the lesser evil

I repeat with changes: You shouldn't accept an allowance from your boyfriend even if he's working because that's not for him to give.

well.. it was interesting to see it on perspective that a girl use up the guy's money.. this is because, to me... the guy always have some agenda to extort the girls money.. I happens, I don't know why....

get this, it get worst when you are married to the person who does not know how to handle financially, extort yours and finish the money off and then to depend on in-laws for more money...

I get this one as a brother in law.... its very very irritating on seeing how irresponsible he is. My sister also a stupid one who don't limit their family's spending.

Now?

Riding a Gen-2 car (on loan and buy it immediately after it was sold out to public)
Have a Nokia N78 (also switch handphones monthly)
Steal/Sell off my dad's expensive stuff (The home theater/amplifier) (My dad turns blind eye on this actually)
Finish off my first sister's savings (on the car and not using his money)
Smoke in front of his 4weeks old baby and 3 years old daughter (finish 2-4 box of cigarettes daily)
has a questionable income (no longer work at the car factory.. I notice.. but since he had no degree nor diploma nor a STPM cert... his income were basically under RM1000 but live like someone who had an income of RM5000..)
calls himself as a salesperson who go out at 7am and come home at 4am and have no sleeping disorder (curious..)
can't afford the bills (which my dad pays for 3 years worth of bills - electric, water, ASTRO, housephone and ect)
have a debt of RM8000


and pull off a big fight about "how poor he is and how poor his family is and how ungrateful it is my family is" to my third sister.

hahah... how disgust I am to people who acted like they are rich when they aren't.


=====================

In my case, I was flattered when my BF offer to pay but then, it makes me feel degraded on some moral level... lol

yeah..u r rite...not like what "pure greek"...give 30%..omg!!...

Your brother in-law is so terrible.

I got this friend back in hometown is totally the other way around... the chick work and the guy lepak dota... both age 23. His gf sometime work at bintang walk some cafe there b4. Quite cun but dono why she work and support her bf.... her bf jobless for more thn few years. I see also walau eh...

i agree wid u lehh, alexandrak!

as a GaL, shuldn't be too RELY on ppl..
GOTTA be independent n' STRONG!!

Well that depends lah... if you are close to the guy/ he is your bf, once in awhile oso no problem... but I dont really agree on bfs giving money allowance to gf lah... got such thing huh? I agree with StrikeZ, if he is not working then A-A - go on dutch ker... or he belanja this time, then u belanja next time... but I know some guys love to shower the gfs with things... So depending on the relationship...

for me i won't ask. if he willing i will accept depends on the situation. if the thing is expensive i will not accept. is not easy to earn money after all

True enough.
Once in a while spending the boyfriend's money would be fine,
But if it comes too often, then perhaps it will lead to no good

its not nice at all for a girl to just use the bf money like that cause you know your bf is not working thus he still spends for you on clothes , food or any other stuff. think the gf should think that since his not working, she would have to support her self by using her money to help her in sort of stuff but if she is kinda out of cash then its fine to donate some cash to her and ask her to pay back later. be equal and help one another

This post has been edited by Calvin871989: Jul 1 2008, 03:39 PM

if my bf gv me monthly allowance & i accepted it, i just feel tat i'm under his control. i dun mind if he's paying for dating expenses but if there's extra allowance to pay for me its quite wierd. i'm working n got my own salary so i'm still able to survive wif tat.

to all girlz..
use guy money not a crime..but dun over use lar...cover cover ur bf wallet abit...u all oso dun wan ur bf need 2 eat bread every time especially not around u,rite??

i last time also think if use bf $$ for movies and eat is alright.....until break up, i only know that what i think is wrong. maybe i should think of the guy also a student and not yet working, so he cant pay everytime when we go out. but i also got think this is also because we are bf and gf just wanna to try whether we suitable for together or not, so that we cant ask the guy pay everything for us...?

erm.. i dont accept my bf paying for me at all i dont mind using other guys punya money though.. hahaha! only if they r willing to belanja la.. i dun mind paying for my bf but if he pays for me, i feel reli bad..

ya me also think if just pay for eat and movie, that's ok. but sometimes he also got buy me some clothes...me also think that's no good...that's why i seldom ask him buy me clothes...but maybe he is still a student, so hard pay for eat and movie also. when i realize this is a money issue problem, i only know that's too late coz we adi break up... actually i dun think we got any big problem but can cause break up..haiz...

yaya..agree....since if u are work then y not together bear the cost... or u just pay wat u like to bought lolz...since the thing ur bought is 4ur own use de....
fair to all..and now all concern equal treat between girl n guy... so..
GIRL please kindness to ur bf la... hehehe

i dun think its gud to use bf money while he is still studying coz the money cum frm his parents.And as u said, his parents is not that rich. But there are ger outside who is 'sampai hati' to use lor...

yeah.. i have frens who scold me cos i pay for my own things.. she say "that's what guys are for" i reli..

Girls like these arr. . *sigh*

They want equality yet we still gotta pay

lol.. u've never paid for ur gf before?

If I had one (gf that is), I will once in awhile, but she's gotta pay for my drinks!

hahaha! sounds fishy... u drink alot isit xD maybe a whole bathtub at once x.x like a camel

i hv a guy fren who loves his gf so so much. He n i were d same class n he dreamed of becoming a doctor 1day. His gf is in2 fashion vr much. My fren took up part time job while studying to support 4d daily expense, gf gifts, gf clothes,makan, movie,... With the job out there he frequently absent in class. After v graduated,i bumped in2 him 1day, he said he was offered a higher rank in his workplace, then he told me he plan 2let go of his dream n not2 further his education, coz he hv2 support 4his gf allowance, n o ya, her gf get 2study happily + enjoy all her new designer's clothes, stylish new hairstyles.....

um.. not 2say jeolous but it's kind of "eye-sore" 2me. Talk about woman these days striving for equalities, ya right! No offense but gals like honey glued 2her bf 24/7 4dis n dat is kind of useless. U guys really love ur gfs THAT much until u r willing 2gv her everything (even u r reaching end meets)? Pampered lifestyle... don u think this is materialove?

Haha, talk about trying to KEEP the relationship going. Might as well be considered a sugar daddy er.... boy


I wish I had that kind of tolerance but no, I lost of the taste of liquor and stickin to beers & cocktails

ah.. one word.. stupid~~ the girl is so mean.. how can she treat a guy like that? she's like leeching off him..

This post has been edited by yingjee: Jul 8 2008, 04:23 PM

if the guy say yes, then yes lor

this kind of things is between the couple, although the guy money is source from parents. But, when the cash reach his hand, decision is made by himself. So up to the guy lor, of course the gal also dun be gold digger lar.

better buy a cute girl from anywhere la..his situation is like buying love with money..tot sum1 said love cant be bought by money?
this kind of gf ah...better dump it la..no diff from leeches,except one sux blood one sux money
this one i can assure u...after sometime,when the girl got better job and the guy is still in same rank (as he din further study for betta qualification) they will surely break.
wat does tat guy get in the end??
NOTHING![COLOR=red]

This post has been edited by jianjie: Jul 8 2008, 05:04 PM

lols.. u mean.. "one sux blood one sux money" right? haha.. its kinda true la.. but maybe one day d girl will feel bad n treat him good leh.. u wont know rite..

err...tat ONE DAY maybe an eternity..too risky

studying with parents money yet having a g/f on the side to share the moola....hmmmm......interesting....

Unless the guy is having a part-time job whilst completing his study that would have lessen his parents burden ( to those who are still having parents that is paying your tuition please think twice before getting a g/f) because it is gonna cost you one day.

Anywee, unless the guy is working part-time job and seriously have some SPARE cash by offering his g/f ( for instance RM100 out of RM500) he made as an allowance is acceptable but then again....why not think of this way.....parents both are working hard too to support how about their burdens?


as the g/f's part.....hmmm.....she gotta have to 1st understand her b/f is still being supported by his family (financial situation defer by different families) if she really wants something how about try making her own pocket money? then again it is wise to discriminate between the needs and the wants during studies....

Anyway this is merely just my point of view in general.

i can feel tat this gal wont even think of the guy is so hardworking just to support her expenses. really malu got this kinda gal who brought bad impression to other gals. mayb she think tat its her rightful to get everything by asking the bf to pay. but its really made us feel tat she's over materialistic. buy branded just to show off but its not her own money.

well, guy's allowance definitely from parents but + a gf, not enough man, dats y he work, so i guess his own money he like 2spend hw much n wenever he1 2.
So if it was u, wld u do dat 4ur gal? Who noes ur gf so swt swt QQ, n sexy hot... love is powerful man..

---

Added on July 9, 2008, 2:06 amhaha...1 blood sucker 1 ka-ching sucker... my fren le dat1.... he's really a swt guy, it's jz dat...hmm...i don really like d way he's doin all d things 4her gal.. it's like very waste la, a swt guy with a gal like dat...
but love can be very very powerful, maybe d guy got a love hit spell o smtin...

---

Added on July 9, 2008, 2:11 ambut then again mayb d guy actually 1 d gal 2hv his money1 le? or perhaps u r right in which d gal vr demandful...

This post has been edited by BHS: Jul 9 2008, 02:11 AM

It's not love if there's tons of cash involved that doesn't have "wedding" attached to it. But what can I say, people are materialistic.

Unfortunately, such occurences are not exactly rare in Malaysia today.

thx god my gf is a good 1..always support each other..
she always refuse my money..always told me to save it for after amriage coz we maybe will need to buy some furniture..whew..she did think about our future...even she always follow me when i go shopping..so i nvr overspend..always remind me to save some money for future..thx god i have her...

before i did help some of my friends to teach materialistic gals...
1st tackle them..show we have good economy..when they fall for it..i shall give a little only to the gurl..somewhat show that i actually dont have much..tell them that this is not mine..that is not mine..
when they leave me..or i leave them..i shall show the gurl the "real" me..somehow they will regret it and i shall hit them in their face^_^

geez...i like ur gal man, so considerate!
ur last phrase says u'll hit them in deir face..wow, really? hit wif coins ar? haha...XD

hahahah... "real" u = ? u very rich ah

what would I do for my gal ?

well, I cant cover all her expenses. At least when special occasion I will do what I shud do. then love shudnt measure by my cash ?

well, i used to think so just like u but perhaps the gals never think like that cos u are a guy and gals' mind are totally diff u know even though i am a guy but i understand this. perhaps the gals wont feel regret but they will think that u are selfish cos u dont really or refuse tp spend much on them although u wants to test them (it is just like having the first date with a gal by taking her out on a motorbike, if she is willing to ride on it, is gd but id she refuses, u really need to consider her again). sometimes i do feel like many dating couples maintain their relationship by money, guys pay and get sexual intercourses from their gf. i apologize if i'd said sth rude here. but many couples maintain their relationship in a healthy mind. that's wat i hope so. it depends on couples and how both persons think. sometimes we need to give and take rite? money is a sensitive issue. even if the gals regret but they will only show that they think u are selfish.

---

Added on July 12, 2008, 4:11 pm yeap, u are right, love cant be measure by guy's money. what if ur gf love to spend and u love her so much and yett u cant afford it? my gf spends a lot as her dad give her a lot of money to spend and what i do is advise her dont spend like there is no 2ml. now she used to spend when there is a need and learn to keep money for future. gals who really love and care their bf wont demand for bf money, they will try to save bf's money for their future... think wisely.

This post has been edited by jmorpheus98: Jul 12 2008, 04:11 PM

If the guy insisted on giving allowance, just take it politely lo. But then, once in a while girl should pay somethings.
Just like when having a meal, it's best to either, roughly pay half or belanja each other alternately.

haiya..very hard der ley...like me n my close fren go out n eat..i said ady i will pay..when i wan pay he sure dont let...no good...

ya ya, me2!! sometimes i jz let dem belanja me coz i think it's perhaps d guy's face/macho-ness. But sometimes i1 2belanja dem as a small appreciation of thank u, dey still don1 i'll jz yell I PAY LA!! then they jz shocked n let me pay once...haha..so funny..

But guys, wld u mind if ur gal pay 4u? not those valentine o b/day special occasion1 la, but d normal eating that type like she1 2thank u smtin like dat.

As long asi afford it and i still got extra for myself, at least can eat, not hungry to death just to spend for her.
And also, paying for gals is not big problem, the thing is the girl got appreciate or not, if shes a biatch she will ask for more for sure, and of coz wont treat her "bf" as "bf', more like a free bank.

my gf did pay for me
well erm,sometimes due to guy's pride and ego we do mind bout that..

for the source of this kinda reaction,i think its peer influence from public. since small we r thought that 'guy who pay for girl is gentleman. we should be gentleman'

and some girls out there do think that,
'my bf should pay for me.it's his responsibility wat.if not i so easy let u kau ah? guys who don't pay for gf r jerks and 'mou pan' (cantonese,means no moral).if that guy cant pay for me,better forget bout courting me..'

so what do other guys think bout this?
girl's opinions are welcome very much also

my bf gives me money everyday..but not really all his..i give him my 80% from my salary..everyday he will give me only RM10 to spend on food when i go work..movies..every other things he will buy..so we are kinda sharing what we earn!and it stops me from spending too much too!!i used to not working for 3 months..so that im using his money..i have to..if not how o?i wasnt working..no income..i cant ask from my parents..

---

Added on July 14, 2008, 6:11 pmwhen i was in college..i do think that if guys who ask money from girls are as*hol*..but now i grow older..bf gf better share share lo..sometimes he pays..sometimes she pays..then it's ok..after married..everything also half half..so better get used to the AA system rather than depend everything on the guy..guy working also very san fu!

This post has been edited by ~bsj~: Jul 14 2008, 06:11 PM

Girls privilege?
Sometime It was not guy choice to pay or not pay...
haih..gals..
Love and Money when already become equal?no money then means no car, no condo, no....
No love?

I rather be Single if like that, then i can save those money for my own, enjoy the single life and freedom.

However, sometime if money can solve some problem or make her happy, also no choice, isn't?
U dare to see her angry by those money? IF still affordable then just do it.

Max expend fo i am still student RM700 for her Handphone..
most expensive special day: Valentine day.

I was brought up by my parents not to depend on any man. My dad has always put our educations first and told me to learn how to stand on my two feet. So the answer is no, i dont use guys money neither do i use my hubbys. I pay as well when we go out. If i want something badly, i use my own moolah and buy it. I dont believe in hinting my hubby as well.

spending guy's $$$$ when v knew they r working jor...... if he is still studying jus not to let him spend much loh..... mutual understanding ma

hahaha...got once i eat with my close fren (guy)..when finish eating he take out his wallet..then coz i know the auntie..he dunno...i stare at his wallet till he take out..then when he call the auntie...i terus tell "auntie dont take his $$..take mine...hahah..the auntie take my $$...he mumbling and say..next time dowan eat with u ady..hahahah...

I'll tell those girls to get a time machine and go back to the Stone Age Want money, go earn it yourself..

good morning feyhime

oh yeah i agree...

agrees with u....

How if the guy working and studying. lol....

i don't like the idea of using my bf's money... especially when now both of us are still studying and he's from middle income family... when we went out for meal, we pay separately... he loves to cook for me and i insisted to pay half for the ingredients used... i guess it's ok for the guys to pay for special occasion but not for everything or everyday...

does it mean the guy dont like to spend on girl?