After my friend broke up with her boyfriend, I start to fall in love with her. Occasionally she would give me mixed signals, so I decided to confess to know where I stand. She rejected me politely and clearly, saying we could still be friends but I should never fall for her as she only sees me as a friend.

I tried, hoping I can suppress my feelings back to how when she had a boyfriend. But every time we see each other, I fall for her again. I don't think I'm ready for platonic relationship with her just yet.

Should I cut all contact with her, until I'm 100% ready for a purely platonic relationship? And how to tell that I'm 100% ready?

This post has been edited by RocketPiki: Jun 22 2024, 02:57 PM

Even if you don't cut ties with her the friendship will fade away over time anyways. So do you want the fast way out or the torturous way instead?

just find another girl

Currently it's very torturous indeed. Each day I can't stop thinking about her. So it's better to just rip the bandaid.

Just cut it off....don't water any more time in her

It’s neurochemicals wreaking havoc on your emotions. Billions of little synapses firing and releasing dopamine and noradrenaline from the nerve endings that leach out into the blood stream and influence your heart rate, the sweating in your armpits and even the butterflies in your stomach.

Once you realise that you’ve been taken for a ride by these naughty neurochemicals, you can start to take back control of your life by engaging in other activities that release similar neurochemicals - eg exercise, playing games or falling in love with someone else.

Ain’t no sane self respecting man or woman should ever be held hostage by a bunch of molecules.

This post has been edited by hksgmy: Jun 22 2024, 04:26 PM

This isn't my first rodeo, I know this feeling will eventually pass and looking back it would seem silly.

But this is the first time I stay in contact after rejection, which honestly seems like a mistake. At this rate it would take forever for the feeling to pass.

bro, why not you try to experiment - try to date a new girl and tell her about it, see if she is jealous or not.

if you breakup did shed tear and I mean not one time of crying only but continuously. If yes then good if not then just puppy love

How long the neurochemical last based on your experiences

Depends on the individual obviously. No 2 persons are ever the same.

Me or her shed tear? She won't cry for me, she only see me as a friend.

Of course i mean you. Of course now you shed tears but let see again few months later and i will ask you again

I forgot to mention that she has 2 kids, 1 being nonverbal autistic. That's a lot to take.

In a few months, I might be grateful I dodged a bullet.

She already rejected you. I am sure you it's hard to move on but trying even more will likely ruin your friendship. Unless you are willing to risk that.

Well you can have that mindset that mean its not love or just puppy love. Mine also have two kids and I dont really mind though there are certain things to discuss and clear out

No why give up? especially she is now single and ready to mingle. Continue trying. That's life.. I always believe it's the continue effort you pour in which makes a difference

This post has been edited by kidmad: Jun 23 2024, 12:40 PM

The trick is to make her want you more then you want her......hahaha all the best dealing with opposite sex mental games

Normal kids I'm ok. Special need kids I have no experience, but from what I heard, it's not easy. She never bring her kids to see me, so I can't gauge our compatibility.

Because the low far outweighs the high. I prefer the boring days where I'm not chasing anyone, just minding my own business.

This post has been edited by RocketPiki: Jun 23 2024, 05:26 PM

You might be right. Back when she had a boyfriend, I can go months without thinking about her, and every time she will be the one to reach out to me.