In practice, how do you do this on a first date?

Do you call for the bill yourself and ask for separate bills?

Do you discuss it with the guy? Then do the calculator thing?

Or maybe quickly swipe first then ask him to transfer money to u?

All very romantic stuff 😆

I'd inform him about it before we go on our 1st date.

If guy likes the girl (attractive/same level of chemistry), it would feel good for the guy to pay the bill rather than the other way round (It's a pleasure).
If guy somehow didn't enjoy the date so much, it would feel good for the guy if the girl insisted to go dutch (especially if the guy had a series of uninteresting dates)

me myself if asking someone going out for a date , definitely i will pay for the bills , it doesn't matter later on she likes me or not or not more then just a friend , it's once in a while not everyday

Interesting. I never faced this one b4.

Usually its offer to share at end of meal or the next one on me thing.

I just don't want do the stupid, awkward wallet dance with the guy when it's time to pay for the meal. It's better to be upfront abt it.

Anyway it's almost 2024 now...i don't understand why society still expects guys to pay. Such an archaic mindset lol.

i wanna bao ka liao but the girl insist since she also earning

Are you single and looking to mingle right now? (Probably the dumbest question to ask)

there are girls who will use just-because-im-a-woman-you-should-pay card, better keep the costs low if you dont know the person well

Whoever's idea to go on a date should be the one to pay the bill entirely. It is up to the person who was invited on a date, to suggest splitting the bill. Then it is up to the person who initiated the date to accept whether or not to split the bill.

Typically the men invite the women on a date so he should foot the bill. Don't bring a gal to a fancy restaurant that you cannot afford.

Unless your date is ordering every expensive item on every single page/section of the menu. Then you should just bail.

This post has been edited by Lahaha: Oct 18 2023, 01:58 PM

Years ago, a guy from a dating app asked me out for lunch, so I went. He was an oil and gas engineer, and he told me he asked 10 girls out in two weeks when he was not offshore. He said out of the 10 girls he met, he liked 4 of them, and I was one of them.

After lunch, I paid for my own meal (around RM30) because he wanted to split the bill. That's when I realised why men became calculative with a single meal despite their high earnings. There are men who frequently use dating apps to ask girls out + want to keep the dating costs as low as possible for their own benefit.

In my twenties, I went out with about 26-30 men for lunch/dinner dates (they asked me out), and only 2 didn't pay for the meal. The oil & gas engineer was one of them, and the other one was a relationship manager for a wealth management consultancy. The latter then liked me further and brought me to expensive restaurants. He then explained he didn't pay for the first meal as he had met too many gold diggers. After we got to know each other better, he pampered me with fine dining.

So ya, just sharing some male psychology and behaviour that I observed. Based on my experience, 9 out of 10 men would pay for the first meal. The 1 man who didn't pay probably had some motive/concern as I shared above + other possible reasons.

In general, if a man asks a woman out, he pays for her meal... unless the woman insists on going Dutch.

So did you ended up with the relationship manager? Haha

We liked each other and got closer physically. He asked me to meet his parents and thought of marrying me, but he wouldn't kiss me nor tell me that he loved me. I guess he was afraid to give his heart as he had failed relationships before. Also, he wasn't sure if he wanted to have children.

After that, my ex-bf returned and wanted reconciliation, so it became a love triangle. I had feelings for both men, but my ex-bf was more decisive. He straightaway went to see my parents and asked my dad for my hand in marriage.

In the end, the relationship manager chose to let go unwillingly. I could only say he didn't fight hard enough because of his past relationship failures and his feelings for me weren't deep enough. Until today, he's still single in his 40s and seeing/dating many women.

I think he really liked you.

I know. He expressed it through romantic actions. I liked him a lot and thought of marrying him too... It's a pity we didn't reach the official couple stage.

That's why it's important for men to be more resolute when pursuing women. Previous relationships are in the past; don't let them affect current and future relationships. Be bold and open to love again.

Probably better for u. The RM world is filled with young attractive female colleagues, many with the career ambition of marrying a wealthy guy.

If the man first ask out then he should be gentle pay all the bills.

What? You both are malay or what
so you been seeing each other quite awhile and no sex happens?
I wonder how much trauma this guy have to let go

happily married with your then ex-bf?

It's subjective actually, I didn't go much date but a few suggested me to split bill. A few just assume I will pay which I personally don't mind, I'll consider this a way to thank the women for willing to go out for a date with me.