Years ago, a guy from a dating app asked me out for lunch, so I went. He was an oil and gas engineer, and he told me he asked 10 girls out in two weeks when he was not offshore. He said out of the 10 girls he met, he liked 4 of them, and I was one of them.

After lunch, I paid for my own meal (around RM30) because he wanted to split the bill. That's when I realised why men became calculative with a single meal despite their high earnings. There are men who frequently use dating apps to ask girls out + want to keep the dating costs as low as possible for their own benefit.

In my twenties, I went out with about 26-30 men for lunch/dinner dates (they asked me out), and only 2 didn't pay for the meal. The oil & gas engineer was one of them, and the other one was a relationship manager for a wealth management consultancy. The latter then liked me further and brought me to expensive restaurants. He then explained he didn't pay for the first meal as he had met too many gold diggers. After we got to know each other better, he pampered me with fine dining.

So ya, just sharing some male psychology and behaviour that I observed. Based on my experience, 9 out of 10 men would pay for the first meal. The 1 man who didn't pay probably had some motive/concern as I shared above + other possible reasons.

In general, if a man asks a woman out, he pays for her meal... unless the woman insists on going Dutch.

We liked each other and got closer physically. He asked me to meet his parents and thought of marrying me, but he wouldn't kiss me nor tell me that he loved me. I guess he was afraid to give his heart as he had failed relationships before. Also, he wasn't sure if he wanted to have children.

After that, my ex-bf returned and wanted reconciliation, so it became a love triangle. I had feelings for both men, but my ex-bf was more decisive. He straightaway went to see my parents and asked my dad for my hand in marriage.

In the end, the relationship manager chose to let go unwillingly. I could only say he didn't fight hard enough because of his past relationship failures and his feelings for me weren't deep enough. Until today, he's still single in his 40s and seeing/dating many women.