Hey all just wanna get some opinion regarding marriage or how does one know if they are ready to tie the knot..my story is below will summarise it to the best I can

I'm a 33 year old dude and I'm currently dating a 30 year old lady..we met on a dating app early last year and have been in a serious relationship for about 1 year now..last month when we are hanging out and talking, the topic of marriage came out..she asked me what is my plan and when do I want to settle down.

Now this marriage topic has been a big problem for me. Previously in my last two relationships whenever this topic comes out and my answer was I don't know, the relationship goes downhill from there. The girl will be like I'm wasting her time and you get the drift..

Now with my current relationship, I'm trying to be more tactful. So I told her I want to get married but I just don't know when like I'm not sure of the timeline. I think she was not happy with my answer and she started saying things like so why are u with me? Don't u feel we are wasting time? Bla bla bla..then she said she needs to rethink about our current relationship and giving me a cold treatment now.

Why does everything have to be about marriage for women? We had a good time together as a couple, we talked, we hangout, we are there for one another and yet that is not enough? Only marriage dictates happiness? I have been having a hard time to address this marriage topic whenever I'm with someone..I just don't know when I will be ready so does that mean I shouldn't date anybody? Is it my fault? Just help a brother out on this? Totally lost on what to do..

This post has been edited by GambitFire: Aug 28 2023, 09:55 AM

Sorry im going to keep this short -

what you expect from a 30 year old lady? she is going to expired soon.

So to answer your question if your already having doubts that means your not ready.

Some questions you have to think about & answer honestly:
1) Where do you see yourself in relationships? Do you want to get married ever? In 1 year? 3 years? 5 years? 10 years? Never?
2) If you're dating Asian women, their end goal will be to get married, settle down, have children, and secretly wish to marry a rich guy so that they can become housewife. This is especially true for Chinese women.
3) Your partner already asked you a few key questions - "Why are you with me?" "Don't you feel we are wasting time?" etc. etc. What's your honest answer to that?

Secret of life. Nobody is ever ready for marriage, unless you're Ted Mosby. You just try to find the right partner and hope for the best.
If you want to reduce the likelihood of divorce after marriage, go for those pre-marriage counselling courses. It will help determine if you & your partner shares the same life aspirations & goals.

This post has been edited by DSV4600: Aug 28 2023, 10:05 AM

Well looks like you have some doubts.

A woman's dream or instinct is usually to have a family. So they want to look for a proper man to have that family with.

You on the other hand is adamant about marriage. Time for you to wake up and ask the hard question what you want ?

If you dont want marriage, dont waste her time. She is 30 years old, soon she will go into geriatric pregnancy. So time is not on her side.

What is stopping you from getting married ? Commitment issues ? Money ? Lack of freedom ?

Compared to the benefits of getting married...

Yah...lets be real, we all have heard of horror marriages. But what about the good ones.

Think about this and share with her about your marriage views. If she can accept, then its on her. If she cant, let he go and dont deny her happiness for your own selfish reasons for not wanting marriage.

when financial on both is ready

if u ask this Q , that means u r not ready.

That's where both of you got your expectations wrong.

The moment I got together with my girlfriend (now wife), I straight away told her I want to get married once I am in a relationship with her.

She said yes. Then both of us got together and planned our future together.

I have been calling her my wife ever since we started dating.

In any relationship, always be clear and transparent about your expectations and goals.

If you merely want a companion or just want to have sex etc, let the girl know!

Otherwise, you are freaking wasting her time!

dont waste her time

This age range of female is looking for settle down mostly, unless you met like a divorce with kid then it shouldnt be a huge problem cause she has gone through the process itself

you're 33 can easily score some 19, 20 years old...try to look for party girl or someone still exploring what they want (while you working on your career, she still has time to be wasted). if you meet this kind of mature woman usually they're stifled strict or not fun to be around with

This post has been edited by -mystery-: Aug 28 2023, 10:34 AM

Most men go into a locked relationship because he wants sex "steadily" and even worse emotional mother to lash onto lol, they're afraid to go out be a womaniser and test themselves and theories.

I'm really curious what is your plan for this relationship and the future of both of you ?

Getting married was never your plan for every relationship you've been in ?

most people go into a serious relationship because they dont want to feel lonely

more like a companionship you meant? pet kan ada

I jaga puppy before, a lot of times dog can be needy AF, its not like unconditional love is completely good, sometimes people need spaces

Advantages of marriage I can think of:

1. children

2. Better financial security for the other

Marriage is a big deal. If its not in your plan and its in hers then better be frank about it.

Womanising and having many partners is very tiring after a while.

If you are only prioritizing your own satisfaction of your loneliness then it's really very irresponsible for your partner that have plan for their future. If that's the case should just be switching different fwb every night.

Why wanna take someone's time when you are not ready to commit ?

because you don't have a clean and honest intention
I know ive been practicing this lifestyle forawhile and there are lots of things youi cannot control

they can always leave i already have my eyes outside

U think this is game ah

That’s a human being not npc ffs

ts has to realize life is just a series of failures
he's in dilemma now because he still stay in that initial dream alike state where everything is good and infatuated
now the woman already ask for marriage
even if they stay together, there's likelihood cheating happens too
might as well just break up, and rediscover himself

you are not ready. you just want free sex without the commitments. Like the 2 other relationship, it will go downhill from here unless you make up your mind to commit..