hi all.

1st and foremost, im a 20 y/o male, currently studying in a uni in KL.

i can say im a (usually) jovial kind of guy. whenever our group of friends hangs out, i usually be the centre of attention, the one who usually makes the crowd livelier.

but lately (idk, for the past 5-6 month or so?) i kinda lost interest in life. day in and day out i always looking for purpose of my life. i woke up feeling depressed and go to sleep wondering what my purpose of continue living. i think it has to do with me failing in my final exam last year, idk.

i consider myself lucky being blessed with a gf, an understanding parents, n a group of close friend. i didnt feel like this when im with them, but whenever im alone, especially at night, im always be overwhelmed by the feeling of wanting to end my life. i closed all my windows (i live in 6th floor) just so that i dont think of throwing myself out of my bedroom window.

i tried to confide this to my closest friend, but he just scoffs and thought i was joking. when he realised i was being serious, he told me to go out more often (which im trying to avoid, since thats the reason why i failed in my exam), count my blessings in life (which i do). pray to god (which i cant, coz i dun really believe in god) etc etc etc.

idk. being a lurker in kopitiam (was introduced by sum1 to kopitiam, saying that its malaysian version of 4chan. haha.) , i know some of u might think that im a pathetic guy (which i agree)

i just feel so depressed. i was a plump person before, (average weight at 75kg) n i lost 15kg of weight in a span of 5-6 month. i cant sleep normally.

i need help. what should i do? i wanna be that kind of person i was 1 year ago.

please help

This post has been edited by Derp Derpington: Jul 1 2014, 08:21 AM

you can call befrienders, some get some 1 to talk to... 03-79568144 or 03-79568145

http://www.befrienders.org.my/service.html

you're just at that age. You are trying to find your own identity, thus the searching for the purpose and meaning in your life.
The best advice is to consult your uni psychology officer / counselor.
My less good advice is to take up another hobby, a lite one.

I'm also 20 years old and ya, its rough adjusting from studies mode then suddenly having to take on the responsiblities of adulthood.

Like you, I also don't have the freedom to go out to the events I wanna go on weekdays and sometimes weekends due to work.

I also tend to stray myself from my family especially going outside for dinner because I'm quite tired balancing my work and the things I enjoy doing such as blogging and playing mobile games, etc etc.

You are really lucky to have people around you who care for you. Your situation is quite different than me as I've always been a loner myself during my schooling days so ya, I'm already used to it for many years now. I'm a quiet person in nature, and quite different than my virtual self here.

Maybe going out for activities like movies, bowling or "makan" will cheer you up and get back to your usual self. Take your friend's word for it, he gave you quite a good suggestion.

You can also go travelling, the case might be that you are getting bored at seeing the same things everyday.

Listen to music. It always help one to sleep. You are just going through a cycle of life everyone has to go through once in awhile.

Hope this helps.

This post has been edited by ChowQing94: Jul 1 2014, 08:41 AM

one of my friend says that i probably having clinical depression. that i need professional help. do u guys think thats the case? coz when i go google clinical depression, i dun think im having it.

i talked about this alot with my gf, my parents, n my friend. idk if talking to another stranger would help.

so its just a phase? how long would it lasts?

i keep an aquarium for a hobby. got 6 little fish which surprisingly helps calm down whenever the thought attacks. haha.

i go out with my gf almost every week ( we study in the same uni). n i can say, im not like this whenever im around with my friends/family. just that whenever im alone, (when im studying, taking a shower, watching tv, etc.) the thought would overwhelms me. once i was at my parent's home, the thought attacks, n i tried to distracts myself by taking a night walk. in the end i run back to my house coz i feel like throwing myself in front of a speeding car. (yea i know. its pathetic)

i tried music. (which wat my friend suggests) it doesnt helps. i tried many genre of music.(another suggestion of my friend) from classical such as pachebel, 80s music, 90s music, i even tried justin bieber just for the heck of it. none of it helps.

i tried exercising before sleep.(yet another suggestion of my friend) the only result i got from that is a sore body when i woke up the next morning.

idk. i really hope (like u said) that it is just a phase that im having. n it goes away soon.

u can always make plan:-

keep a list of what u wanna achieve in 1 yr time, 3 yr time, 5 yr time.
make goal.. easy one, not hard one to keep your self motivate...

like other say, ur are just trying to pass your teenage time to enter adulthood.

cheerup

Justin Bieber ._. no, don't listen to his songs ._.

Listen to songs you enjoy, doesn't have to be classical.

This website for music : http://coffitivity.com/

Exercise before sleep is a no-no ._.

Idk, but usually when I can't sleep, I drink coffee, then drink plenty of water and try to knock myself out to sleep by playing mobile games or reading books or mangas.

Not healthy if you don't drink water at all after coffee, so ya I guess you can try this way.

You can also try Youtube perhaps when you are have some time for yourself? Try watching videos by SMOSH, Pewdepie or NiggaHiga. Get a few laughs from there.

And also check this websites ( ya, you might waste some time but its might get your mind off the things you are facing for awhile ) :

http://9gag.com/

http://en.rocketnews24.com/

http://www.cheezburger.com/

http://www.boredpanda.com/

http://www.2leep.com/

http://www.wonderhowto.com/

http://outgrow.me/

Maybe you could also work on a hobby? Also, a good start to get life going on.

Have you shared your thoughts with your gf?

This post has been edited by ChowQing94: Jul 1 2014, 09:43 AM

1) go do some charity work (old folks home, foster home, soup kitchen...etc) that will give u a little more perspective in life and how lucky u r.

2) depends on ur height, losing weight could be a good thing. though the sleeping part is an issue.

3) hang out with ppl who are positive, lively. even though u might find them irritating at this stage.

4) idle mind is the devil's playground. read a book, play a game, learn a language. or in ur case, study.

5) if u do all those things that /k members advised and still feel depressed, pls go find professional help.

This post has been edited by cksiah: Jul 1 2014, 10:11 AM

go get yourself a pet- it will help

sport， exercise, yamcha, keep fit, study, learn, play pc game,

think positive.........

Im 30, now prepare looking a girl.........

depression is a serious illness that takes life of many each year.

it happens on people with very good life as well (as what you had mention).

the best solution is to see a psychiatric and get some medicine, but it is not cheap though. around a few k i heard.

cheaper way probably go talk it out with friends and go travel.

So this only happens when you are alone? You need expert help to determine the cause and tackle it. Act now, go see your counselor/psychology officer.

Nolah, I also face this type of thing also.

Just need to see new things and participate more in life so wont get into boredom, dull life phase and get over the issue of crossing from school studies to adulthood.

Sometimes even the brightest star can become dull.

Too much of a good thing can also be someone's downfall.

Everyone has its moments. No one can be happy all the time =_= that's unnatural.

Every individual is different, the things they enjoy and dislike is also different.

Humans have emotions. From here, I can see it's just a phase and how people handle it might be difficult or easy depending on the individual.

Only he can decide on what actions he can take. We can only suggest and help him out as much as we can.

On the pretence of comparing life of others, it is subjective to one's view.

even though have emotions but does not need to resort to drastic results like losing interest in life..
i might be wrong or have a wrong impression but to me it sounds like he wants to die

He might also be suffering depression or mild case of adapting to change.

And, like others mentioned above, he might also consider seeing a professional or talk to Befrienders.

Finding purpose in life is a life long task.

As you age, you find that your purpose and expectations will change. Sometime when the changes are unexpected, it can cause depression as you are feeling now.

The KEY to overcoming your depression is to realize that it is a FEELING. The factors around you have not changed. Your parents still love you, you have your gf and your friends. It is only your PERCEPTION of them that has changed.

Why do people get these feelings?

if I have the definite answer I will be more famous than Sigmund Freud.

But being able to identify that it is actually merely a Feeling gives you the power to exercise your Will not to give in to the Feeling.

Look at it as similar to going on a thrilling ride, take bungee jumping for example.

Fact is, it is quite safe with a very small chance of accidents. But many people will be afraid to do it because of fear of heights etc etc.

Those who do it exercised their Will power to over come their fear and make the jump.

Similarly you can exercise your Will power not to Feel the depression but to divert your attention to other areas of thoughts that will cheer you up. This is especially helpful in the middle of the night when you are alone.

Recognize that depression cannot hurt you unless you allow it to. Paying attention by entertaining depressing thoughts gives it strength while ignoring it and diverting your attention weakens its power over you.

You have done well by being able to talk to your parents and gf.

Take the next step by willfully ignoring the feelings when they strike you.

All the best to you in your studies.

The final exam dealt a blow to you? There are people choose to drop out of college because of many reasons. It is not the end of the world. You need to check with yourself with many questions. Don't be too hard on yourself and don't blame others. Re-asses your options on how to carry on. Not everyone follows the same path. They are sheep following what others doing. You need to carve out a path of your own. Be strong brother.

talk about it alot with my gf. but lately i didnt coz i think it bothers her too much.thanx for the links. gonna try it tonite.

1. gonna try that
2. im 5'5". yeah thats the only good thing came out of this 'ordeal' that im having
3.4. done that

i got myself some fishes


im trying not to go to a psychiatrist. money doesnt come easily in my family. same goes for travelling