Hello, very frequently I see women in public that I fancy. However every time I too scared to approach, no idea why (everytime after I leave I keep regretting not approaching).
I think it's because I have not tried something like that before. I have only tried chatting up the girl that served my ice cream, but felt a bit awkward.

So how should you approach strangers? Let's say it's in dining area, like a food court or restaurant. I thought about starting with a compliment but I don't know what to say after that.

And for those even more knowledgeable, will something like this work in Singapore? (Because in 2 months I will be studying in NTU).

I don't think I am very handsome though, however not totally sure since nobody told me. But I am fairly tall 180cm.

This post has been edited by Police4896: May 31 2024, 02:07 PM

you need a good pickup line and definitely try not to look creepy...

best pickup line i have is hello. your hair look nice.

thank god I have been told that I look like rapist by my friend.

however i think maybe i can just try speak more confidently then can already?

This post has been edited by Police4896: May 31 2024, 02:27 PM

Think it's best you try to approach in a common social setting then outright. If outright you must have really charming personality or looks n gugu which make girl want to open longkang for you. These days better find through app.

hello adik cantik comel, nak comolot boleh tak?

real answer pls. if i wanted do this i might as well go 美女一个人?要吃香蕉吗？

if you want the real answer, hit the gym. learn how to look good. improve yourself financially. learn how to dress.

do NOT approach women. women will approach you.

sekian

if i die die also want to approach then how?

but really my only problem is that i dont know how to dress and dont know how to "look good". everytime t shirt and jeans only. but how to "look good"? i dont have a lot of acne, face and nose only problem is somewhat bumpy due to itchy hand when i was young. but now i use moisturiser no pimples already. my hair not bad looking also, got wolf cut. what else to do??

i am not fat, i already run 5km 3x every week. financial is not relevant since i mentioned in the post, i am student. so how?

all these things i have heard years before and i have already worked on it, now i feel that my problem is that i dont have the confidence, and the rizz

This post has been edited by Police4896: May 31 2024, 03:04 PM

if you know you lack confidence, work on it.

one thing i learned that if a girl likes you, you could be the laziest bum on the planet or the hugest asshole. she will still want to be with you.

on the opposite end if you're seeking women who are not interested in you, even talking to them makes them give you the stink eye.

the dating scene is really bad nowadays where women can be spoilt for choices with the ease of apps. you are at disadvantage before you start.

but this disadvantage can be your strength.

you already "lost"

so you have nothing to lose.

if you insist on talking women up, build your confidence first. you can do this by randomly talking to men first. see that random dude? go ask him something or compliment him. if you cant even do that with the same sex, how do you expect to do so with the opposite gender?

after building up your confidence and having a nothing to lose mentality, you can start casually just talking to people.

always go in there with the mindset "i m just here to talk/ask something" NOT "i want her number". of course some women prefer the direct can i have your number approach. but if you want to go that route than go that route. its all or nothing.

theres no real right answer. it all depends on what you're willing to try.

some dudes on dating apps start off with "can i fuck you". its super crude but out of many, sometimes, sometimes a girl will ask when and where. different people prefer different approach. thats up to you to figure out but at the very least get your bases sorted out.

get the proper mentality, get the confidence.

thx bro good ans

wtf bro
Singaporean chicks can be more attracted to farkboy
i like filipina too cause they're quite open

ah ok so i should go there join the school gym, join a lot of sports, talk nonsense to everyone i meet?
thats what farkboy do right

i dont really like filipina, reminds me too much of maids.....

If you’re still in school/uni, just join clubs and societies and mingle around. The girls will gravitate towards you if they’re interested. From that point onwards just play your cards right.

If you're in your early 20s, you've plenty of time to waste on. I was in your shoes being clueless last time. Now I've gone out over hundreds of females, it became like an easier game as you gained experience

yeah im turning 20 this year. i wasted my entire teenage years playing computer, i dont want to waste whole 20s doing the same. approx how many did you go out with per month?

also since you seem very wise, what else should i be doing to not regret wasting my youth?

Hahaha you can try.

I guess it just happen naturally.

Unker got only a handful of experience amoi stranger approach me in public and its all happen during ma shopping for grocery.

1) I was holding a can of jam reading the ingredient. Out of nowhere amoi poup and show me another can, telling me thats better, suggesting me to try.

2) I was pushing ma trolley around, passing by one amoi few time, each time got make eye contact (obviously because she quite cute). Then when I was at one lane looking for staff she came approach me asking me where I get one of the item in my trolley.

I guess you can try the menthods above to approach amoi you fancy in public place. Then you can establish common topic to talk.

Good luck

Can't say much about techniques but I can give insight on what ladies might feel towards cold approaches:
- comments about physical appearance from a stranger might be risky... at worst, you're scary/creepy.
- avoid approaching someone who may not feel safe at the time, e.g. someone walking alone + quiet place... Don't give them a reason to run away from you

Honestly for you as a student, I think it's better to try your luck in university. Join events and clubs, work in committees, you'll learn something plus opportunity to hang out with girls and catch a glimpse of their personalities too. Unless you're that eager to fuck around, then I guess it's just a numbers game -- get rejected enough and you'll grow immune and be able to approach anyone.

What course will you be starting at NTU? For some courses like Engineering, the vast majority of students are male… you’ll have slim pickings and massive competition… good luck in advance!

And I suppose you’ll be staying on campus? Campus life is great and gives you an opportunity to mix around with different genders, esp thru hostel sports etc.

dont spend on stupid trends like latest iphone or concert
focus on what you want to achieve in future months or a year
If youre in school you can easily become more popular cause most uni students are nerds and socially retarded

make friends with people who focus on "how" instead of "why" or negative friends. As your social awareness improves, you can filter which kind of people is good to hang around

This post has been edited by -mystery-: Jun 1 2024, 08:58 AM

Wow….

getting good with girls is like finding or create values
In entrepreneurship, whoever constantly provides better values will always win, looking from a longer term perspective

thats why whenever i see the ads from insta
i would say most of them are fucking bullshit
they focus on attracting low paradigm people

Alas, I sold my magic beans way too early when I got hitched young (but thankfully to a woman that I’m still madly in love with after 30 years) so I can only cheer you on and live vicariously through your adventures

Yo, NTU PhD student here. I am about 5 cm shorter than you, still single and available (male, not female...).

We can go look for girlfriend together...

There are lots of events for undergrads.. Tackle the ones in class and student societies.. But you need to know your life plan and see if the girl fits into your plan and how much you can compromise. Do you plan to stay in SG after you graduate? Do you plan to settle down here? Looking for long-term or short-term relationship etc. Need to make sure you know yourself well before you start pursuing the opposite gender.

The girls here are more open and a little more sexy compared to the one in Malaysia... Just so you know... Need to be mentally prepared...

but motel accomodation quite expensive in singapore
I guess its give and take

lol I am not asking TS to go to bed with the girl

Well if she loves you enough she will do it with you... I saw condom packages outside my hall's bus stop pretty often...

Whether they "do it" in hall or budget hotel or even their own home I have no idea.

That said, I am looking for more than sex in a woman. Recently one girl I met on XHS told me she likes me because she is sapiosexual... But whenever I discuss sex and post-marriage life plans with her she will just keep quiet... INFJ girl...

Let's see...

Bro, PhD mah…. Sapiosexuals will find that irresistible….

hmm... one time at lrt station i exchanged glances with a girl a few times, was a bit weird since twice i looked at her, she looked away then i also look away, then when i go back look at her she was looking at me.... but didnt go anywhere n she just went where she was going lol

hmm i take that it's a face thickness problem if i want to play the numbers game?

physics & math double major... i guess its almost as bad as engineering when it comes to gender ratio
and yeah i am planning to stay at campus, but i never heard that their halls got sport events? only saw on reddit that they play a lot of mahjong

as in, "how" you would do something, rather than "why" you would do something?
well ill admit that i am the "why" type.... guess ill have to change

bro dont get me too excited..... going to be very long 2 months

sapiosexuals actually exist? i thought its just a joke

Wahlao… good luck bro! Hahaha

Very nice, I am in SPMS as well. Division of Physics and Applied Physics (PAP).

The gender ratio is very bad, the girls here are taken very fast... Business school will have a more balanced gender ratio, followed by engineering.

Arts, design and media (ADM) (far from SPMS) and Social science/humanities school (at SHHK building, just next to SPMS building) has a skewed gender ratio but towards the lady's side, so you might want to drop by those 2 places more often to look for your treasures...

You are exchange student? 2 months might be ultra-short term relationship

If you are active in sports yea that's a good idea. There are girls who like badminton, swimming, gym, cycling etc. You can play some games with them and have a short conversation, then exchange numbers. Don't be shy. If they voluntarily give you their number, that means you can text her and ask her out 2-3 days later for a meal and "discuss" further...

The girls here can excite your male hormone... for the unprepared ones... I am not joking... This is not conservative Malaysia... many girls here just wear bralets to the uni...

oh no, i mean i am matriculating in august (2 months later), will be studying there 4 year, then taken tuition grant will work there 3 years

about dropping by adm and shhk.... generally how receptive are they to stranger approach?? seems like i would be going there a lot...

damn.... u mean they wear that as a shirt and nothing else on top?? look like i will also have to train restraint, stop didi standing up too much....

when you interact with someone, try to remove the logical engineering side of brain, you could say stupid shit and get away with it if your vibe is absolutely on fire you'll often notice that on people who drink a little and stay unstifled

90% of actions, 10% of analysis afterwards

Wah not bad. Your academic background must be good. We can yamcha together when you are here. You plan to do research in the future? Sporeans generally go for engineering and not many wanna do Physics haha

As with all girls, unless you meet them through explicit dating-related venues like apps or events or social media (小红书, Instagram etc.), in normal day to day living, they may not be comfortable with your approaches as they don't know you.

Best way to start is still through classmates, work in group assignments, or sit next to your favourite girl etc. (I made this mistake back in high school and uni, mom says don't give girl commitment until you start working... )

Next thing to do thereafter is go for social events like sports and other clubs. There are lots of undergraduate student clubs here: https://www.ntu.edu.sg/life-at-ntu/student-...roups-societies

If you stay in hall there will be Residential Education programmes with a variety of interest, I joined ballroom dance at Saraca Hall last semester (learnt Waltz and Tango, managed to ask a girl out also after I got her number ). North Hill halls like Tanjong focuses on culinary, so if you are foodie can go over there. Other halls focus on art and gardening (like Hall 12), IT/programming, financial planning etc.

There will always be something for you, and in all events there will be girls coming. Don't be shy to talk to them and introduce yourself, your major, "country of origin", interests, accommodation. Lastly, grab the number.

Also, don't be afraid of rejections... some girls got boyfriend since high school already. Learn to respect them.

-----------------------------

Err in case you don't know or misunderstand. I don't mean bra... I mean bralet

These ones...

https://imgur.com/a/egJipMY

This post has been edited by TOS: Jun 1 2024, 02:48 PM

Some tips for you to survive in NTU.

Important Telegram groups include:

NTU Free Food Telegram group: https://t.me/freefoodntu

NTU Marketplace: https://t.me/ntumarketplace

NTU Student Hub: https://t.me/NTUstudenthub

NTU Gobek car-pool platform (you still need to pay... more like an unofficial Grab service, usually guys will pick girls up if they have a car... and it all starts from there...): https://t.me/ntugo

1. If you stay in hall, NTU halls use the stupid ancient "$1" coin system. NTU Office of Campus Housing (OCH) is kiasu kiasi, they never bother to upgrade the system to smarter ones like using student card (which doubles as Ezlink card/NETS card) or Visa/Mastercard as they are afraid of the vendor (Maytag) will raise the price.

To get $1 coins for your laundry, you may WhatsApp this number (+65 9633 1827) and exchange for $1 coins free of charge. Each packet comes with 50 $1 coins, which you exchange for exactly 50 SGD. You can exchange in multiples of $50 SGD as well, like 100, 150 SGD etc. The person will come to the front lobby of your hall to you deliver your 50 SGD notes in exchange for packets of 50 $1 coins.

2. It's wise to invest in a refrigerator during your stay at NTU. Food is free in NTU. This is a top secret... No one tell me until I join that Telegram group... During semester breaks like right now, there will be lots of events happening and you will have lots of free food to grab. The food can either come in the form of bentos or buffet leftover. Always bring with you food containers stand by to collect the leftover food. Keep a sharp eye on where and when events might happen in campus before the food details are posted on Telegram.

When semester begins, the free food will usually be taken and cleared in 5 minutes...

We can chat more if you are interested, I got a lot more secrets to share with you haha

This post has been edited by TOS: Jun 1 2024, 02:51 PM

TS, from I have read, it seems that you are still studying. You should focus on your studying instead of pursuing girls.

Having said that, it's not wrong to want to know more people and expand your circle of friends. If you want to get to know some random stranger on the street without looking creepy and desperate, one of the best way is to approach them and tell them that, you are doing street photography and you think their dress/shirt look nice and you want to take a picture of them so that you can post on insta/fb.

You know what is the best part about this technique? You can also ask for their whatsapp in order to send them their photo you've just taken. It's one of the best way to ask for people's contact without looking desperate. There has been many people doing that and posed their successes on youtube you can just search on youtube for street photography/shooting random people. It would be even more cool if you can get a portable printer and print out their photo and give it to them on the spot, that way, every time they sees the photo, they will remember you.

Of course, for this technique to work, you need to have a dedicated camera and a lens for portrait as well as a portable printer. You will need to learn some photography basic and how to use a camera. Another bonus for this technique is that, by picking up an hobby, it will improve you self coinfidence, which is an attribute many girls like. In case you wonder, YES, I tried it myself and it worked. It may not be 100%, but You will be very surprised how many girls are willing to be shot by you if you have a dedicated camera.

This post has been edited by Loseeker: Jun 1 2024, 06:02 PM

TS is lucky. In life, there are certain universal truths that are fundamental facts. In the faculty of medicine, it is well accepted that <beauty> x <brains> = k, where k is a fixed constant.

So, yeah…. Slim pickings for med students.

which Filipina type - heavier plump type or hot single mum hahaha

Every Sunday, Lucky Plaza in Singapore has a smorgasbord for his selection….

thanks bro for the tips, but why "country of origin" in quotes? am i supposed to lie about that part?
usually you get whole bento or just leftovers? if just leftovers not very interested.... eating other people half eaten stuff. but then you are supposed to keep the food from sem break for a few months until sem begins? wont spoil even if in freezer?

applies to other fields as well? whihc field has largest k

When they talk to you (especially foreigners), they will usually ask if you are from Singapore. They can tell from the slang.

Then you just clarify you are from Malaysia (give cities' description like KL, Penang etc. is also fine)

Nothing negative about "country of origin", some foreigners may think you come from China as well haha.

---------------------------

It's not half eaten... I mean buffet spread, very large buffet for events like conference, talks etc. There will be separate utensils for participants of those events and separate serving spoons for each tray of food. So there is no contact between your utensils and other people's utensils.

Of course for smaller events bentos will be provided instead of buffet.

You don't have to keep the food for months. My 43L refrigerator (which I turn into a freezer, since the food will spoil easily, I turn freeze the food so that it can last for weeks) can store about 22 boxes of food (plastic container of 600-800 ml each). With 2 boxes of food a day, my inventory can last about 10-11 days.

I follow the FIFO (first-in-first-out) inventory management principle to manage my food. Always eat the oldest dated food first, then clean the food container and use it to store new food (if available). The new food stored is then eaten last.

Here are some photos of my "freezer":

https://imgur.com/a/JzN4Xve

Well, I can only tell you what I’ve heard secondhand, since my Master degrees were from (1) NUS and not NTU and (2) at Masters level, I ain’t got time for extracurricular activities since I was also working full time at the hospital…

So, hearsay, some say, anyhow say, the biggest K is to be found in the FASS (Arts and Social Sciences)… that’s probably where you’ll have the right ratio of genders too.

All the best bro, and happy hunting.

It’s a common enough question and an often enough icebreaker to be asked the “where are you from” question.

I didn’t experience it when I was studying in Australia because I assimilated so well (it helped that my residential hall had only 3 Asian boys) and I sounded like a local after 2 weeks, apart from certain less commonly used words which I learnt quickly enough.

Funnily, that became my established English accent and I got questioned multiple times when I was studying and taking my specialist exams in the UK. The examiners couldn’t comprehend why this decidedly Asian looking boy would have such a strong Sydney accent. Same thing when I did my fellowship there - and I used it to to my advantage to break the ice and make new friends.

An interesting anecdote on this aspect - my wife and I were on Safari in Kruger National Park and we took a detour to the Zimbabwe/Zambia border to ride the ultralight planes over Mosi Oa Tunya (Victoria Falls). We were there with my classmate and his family, who flew in from Sydney via Singapore, and we were having a chat while waiting our turn to go on the ultralight.

There were these 2 Australians in front of us in the line and one of them turned around to face me and greeted me with a “Good Day, mate, fellow Aussie here. Can’t help but overhear your accent. Inner West Sydney eh?” I suppressed a chuckle and said “Good ear, mate, good ear” and he seemed really chuffed with himself, telling his friend that not only could he distinguish an Australian accent, he could pinpoint it down to the suburb (apparently he lives in the suburb next to mine).

After they got on the ultralights, my wife and I, together with my classmate and his family, burst out laughing.

So yeah, accents can be a great icebreaker.