Pembentangan Justice for Sisters mengenai isu LGBT di era PH dan PN

Pengasas Bersama Justice for Sisters Thilaga Sulathireh ketika membentang laporan 22 bulan PH dan 100 hari pertama Perikatan Nasional (PN) di salah sebuah hotel di Petaling Jaya pada Rabu.

SINCERE QUESTION HERE

My little brother, i know he has a gay history. Use to dress like a girl before. But now no longer. Due to religion factor, he wish to stop. BTW i dont influence him anything

Now, he decided to marry a woman. Question is which kind of woman suitable for him? Is woman with tomboyish style more suitable for him?

that is up to him la what kind of woman he wants to marry wtf

U guys are really judgemental isnt?

i am not even gay

Did he or your family tasked you of finding him a new wife or something?

In my opinion, people who claimed to have changed because of God never actually changed. It is just their way to appease people around them. If I were in your shoes and I care about my brother, I'd advise against marrying because he is going to lead the path of unhappiness and will also subject his future wife to unncessary pain. He better off being single.

Blame the LGBT card activated.

Remembering Mark Bingham, the fearless gay hero who helped take Flight 93 back from hijackers on 9/11
Source: https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2020/09/11/mark-...-terror-attack/



On the 19th anniversary of 9/11, we remember Mark Bingham, one of the fallen heroes of the tragedy that inflicted the US on 11 September, 2001.

Mark Bingham was tall. He towered at 6’4″ which, with his broad physique and booming personality, made him hard to miss and quite hard to forget.

He could easily have played any sport – rugby was his personal favourite – and friends and family knew him for always having a video camera to hand, being an aspiring filmmaker.

The openly gay rugby player once fought off an armed mugger to protect his partner of six years, Paul Holm. “He hated to lose at anything,” Holm once recounted.

So, when television screens flashed with the news that passengers on United Airlines Flight 93 battled their hijackers on 11 September, nobody who knew Bingham was surprised to learn he was involved.

What happened?

Bingham was among the passengers who, along with Todd Beamer, Tom Burnett and Jeremy Glick, hatched the plan to retake the plane from the hijackers.

A plan that ultimately saved countless lives.

Hijackers intended for the plane to hurtle into a Washington DC landmark. Instead, the plane crashed in a grassy, empty field near Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

Around 30 minutes after hijackers commandeered the plane, the group rushed the cockpit. The plane was 20 minutes of flying time away from its suspected target, thought to be the White House or the US Capitol Building.

While risking their own lives, Bingham and the passengers successfully overthrew the hijackers.

The 31-year-old was the last to board the flight. In fact, he nearly missed it after he overslept that morning.

Bingham was returning to San Francisco for a fraternity friend’s wedding. He arrived at the Terminal A at 7.40am, ran to Gate 17 and took to his seat in 4D, according to flight records.

Sat in the first class patch of the plane, the hijackers were right in front of the public relations officer when shouting their demands.

All 44 people lost their lives aboard Flight 93, but their actions likely [B]saved hundreds more – and Bingham is remembered as one of the many heroes of 9/11.

As outlets covered his heroic act, questions of whether his sexual identity is relevant to reports were raised. Was he a ‘gay hero’ or a ‘hero who was gay’?

Just two days after the 9/11 attacks, two reverends on CBN asserted that God, angered by homosexuality and abortion, had allowed the attacks to happen.

‘Hi, Mom, this is Mark Bingham.’

At 6.44am, the mobile phone of Alice Hoagland buzzed. She was staying at her bother Vaughan’s house.

Picking up her cell, she heard a familiar formal voice – her son’s.

“Hi, Mom. This is Mark Bingham,” her son said. Then only: “I love you,” and he hung up.

The former United Airlines flight attendant would never hear her son’s voice again. But she tirelessly ensured people would know his name.

Hoagland, who raised Bingham as a single mother, became an ally for LGBT+ rights as well as an advocate for increased airline safety and security.



While the Bingham Cup, a biennial international rugby union competition predominantly for queer men, was established in 2002 in his memory.

“I’m proud of Mark and everyone involved in the Bingham Cup,” Hoagland told radio station 702 ABC Sydney.

“I lost my son, but gained 60 teams of rugby players,” she said.

“The legacy Bingham carved out is not forgotten,” chair of International Gay Rugby (IGR) Ben Owen once said in reverence of Bingham to PinkNews.

“Mark was instrumental in sparking what has become the international gay and inclusive rugby movement today as a member of and founder of some of the first ever clubs.

“His strength of character, love of the game of rugby and heroic spirit lives on throughout IGR and our member clubs around the world and we look forward to continuing his legacy next August at the Bingham Cup Ottawa 2020.”

Bingham’s partner Holm remembers him as brave and how they fell in love over a bowl of shrimp.

With a big grin, Bingham approached Holm at a Christmas Party in 1993.

“Hi, I’m Mark Bingham. Who are you?” he said, recounted Holm.

TikTok admits restricting some LGBT hashtags
Source: https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-54102575



TikTok has acknowledged that it restricts LGBT-related hashtags in some countries as part of its "localised" approach to moderation.

A report by the Australian Strategic Policy Institute (ASPI) think-tank said many LGBT hashtags were "shadow-banned" in Bosnia, Jordan and Russia.

A shadow ban limits the discovery of content without indicating that a particular hashtag is on a ban list.

TikTok said that some hashtags were restricted to comply with local laws.

According to the ASPI, terms that were not linking to content included "gay" in Russian and Arabic, "I am a lesbian" and "I am gay" in Russian and "transgender" in Arabic.

TikTok said that while some terms were restricted to comply with local laws, others were limited because they were primarily used to discover pornographic content.

It added that some English phrases and some compound phrases in Arabic had been moderated by mistake, and that it had fixed the issue.

And it said some of the hashtags reported by the ASPI did not reveal any content because they had never been used by a video-maker on TikTok.

It said it was "deeply committed to inclusivity".

Many LGBT social media users will be unsurprised by these findings - especially those who live in one of the "shadow-banned" nations, where the struggle to be themselves extends far beyond hashtags on the internet.

In June 2020, TikTok branded itself as supportive of LGBT Pride, and the company made donations to organisations supporting LGBT people.

While TikTok may believe in "accountability and transparency", its algorithm keeps getting caught out for discrimination.

One TikTok user living in South East Asia told me, while they were disappointed that their gender identity was being categorised as inappropriate in their native language, they knew the ways around the bans and frequently used them.

They added: "That's just part of what being LGBT in 2020 is."

LGBT rights group Stonewall said social media platforms such as TikTok provided a "vital community hub" for LGBT people, "particularly for those living in countries where they can face persecution for being themselves".

"While we understand why local laws my affect some restrictions, it's crucial TikTok follows up its statement of support for LGBT creators with action to tackle shadow banning of LGBT hashtags," said Stonewall's head of communications, Robbie de Santos.

In a statement, TikTok said: "We believe that accountability and transparency are essential to facilitating trust with our community. As part of this, we've committed to making our moderation policies, algorithm, and data security practices available to experts, which no other company in our space has been willing to do."

In February, transgender users complained of censorship on TikTok after many had posts removed from the video-sharing platform.

And in December 2019, it was revealed that videos by disabled users were deliberately prevented from going viral by the app's moderators.

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Added on
Tiktok hasn't applied its LGBT content shadow ban in Malaysia yet, but seeing how they are more than happy to comply to local laws in other countries, it's possible it will be applied one day.

Hold your hormones! — Ahmad Yasin
Source: https://www.malaymail.com/news/what-you-thi...d-yasin/1903924

SEPTEMBER 17 — “Maaflah terlupa apa nak kata, makan banyak sangat hormon,” I kept recalling the joke made by one of the trans activist in Malaysia as I started to become more entrenched within the interaction I have with the trans community.

Hormone plays a significant role in the formation of trans livelihood. For transwomen, apart from the sexual reassignment surgeries, hormone replacement therapy is a journey to be embarked in the strive for feminisation.

I sat down with the social workers of SEED Foundation as I started to become more interested in the condition of the soft white underbelly of Kuala Lumpur.

They recollected the tales of abuse faced by sex workers, the death of trans individuals by heartbreaks and at the hands of vengeful lovers and the rise in the usage of drugs by youth of the city due to an ominous yet systematic operation of the underground gangster conglomerate.

As our conversation got a lot livelier, I was enticed by the topic brought up by them on trans individuals which is transwoman’s usage of hormones to achieve femininity.

Sexual reassignment treatment is a delicate matter. While surgeries are the primary issue often brought up in discourse on sexual reassignment treatment, hormone replacement therapy is as significant in the construction of trans self-esteem. What is rather unfortunate is that the handling of hormone replacement therapy in Malaysia is dire.

In the recent times, many of the hormone medications transwomen relied on had been discontinued by the Malaysian government. Medication such as anti-androgen used by prostate cancer patients to contain the growth of cancer have also been used by transwomen to contain their testosterone production.

Subsequently, male secondary sexual characteristics such as facial hair which is not necessarily wanted by them can be reduced.

Alternatively, although it is not optimal, underprivileged transwomen will also opt for birth control pills. Transwomen are aware of oestrogen’s effect and its usage as a form of hormone replacement therapy for male to female trans individuals.

However, due to the shortage of its access in Malaysia, many of them turn to birth pills with the hope that the content of oestrogen within the pills will have the same result. It should be noted that birth control pills are not indistinguishable from prescribed oestrogen as a therapy and medication.

The differences in content combination and dosage is a signifier in the differences in usage. But without the availability of the hormone therapy itself, precautions are often not given prioritisation.

The lack of access and care for trans individuals particularly within the scope of health and wellness birthed a detrimental capitalistic climate for them. Private clinics in areas with a heavy concentration of trans individuals particularly the underprivileged trans individuals will often provide illegal hormone injections.

Nonetheless, such clinics are purely for-profit as they may not provide the necessary blood test to monitor the compatibility of the hormones with the trans individuals. The intensive blood monitoring may be provided by private hospitals although for many trans individuals, it is not quite affordable.

The health authorities of the private hospitals do include written prescription for the needed hormones but do not provide the hormones themselves.

Surprisingly, hormones are available at ease through 15 ringgits pills obtainable through mainstream online market. Shipped from the motherlode of genericity, labelling of the pills are of unidentifiable Chinese scripts that even Chinese individuals consulted by the trans individuals to translate failed in understanding.

Consumption without knowledge will inevitably bear fruit. In a few weeks, the transwomen will do form breasts and their hips will be more rounded per wishes, but in many cases, the same individuals will develop complications.

Without intensive monitoring of blood test, trans individuals consuming the hormone pills on their own compliancy resulted on the weakening of their bones and for the few of them that smoke, they will face an increased risk of developing cardiovascular complications and even worse, death.

Discrimination against trans community is not limited only to through the projection of hate crime and legal issues. When trans individuals are not given much prioritisation within the realm of health on trans specific issues, they are subjected to a systematic oppression that will lead to the deterioration of their condition.

Should they be left to their own devices on formulating the ways to help themselves, the nation is responsible for the crime of neglection.

Advocacy for the rights of trans community will always include the right for trans individuals to receive treatment and therapy as a reflection to the visibility of them as a valid gender identity.

Until then, semoga kita terus berbakti.

Malaysia's Temperature Check 2020

“Malaysia’s Temperature Check” research was produced in order to understand the Malaysian public opinion on contemporary Social and Economic issues, as well as understudied opinions. It was also intended to discover what are Malaysians agreeing and disagreeing with, in order to guide further public conversations and future policy directions. This research is also an attempt at identifying what are Malaysians undecided on, in order to facilitate discussions and better education on these particular issues.

Key Highlights:

1. 68% of Malaysians agree that religious practice is a private matter and should be separated from politics, while 20% disagree.
   
2. 54% of Malaysians disagree that people should be allowed to choose their gender identity, while 20% are undecided.
   
3. 44% of Malaysians believe, Apostasy, which is a formal dis-affiliation from, abandonment of, or renunciation of a religion by a person, should not be allowed in Malaysia. 31% Malaysians remain undecided.
   
4. 45% of Malaysians do not agree that homosexual intercourse to be decriminalised in Malaysia, while 22% remain undecided.
   
5. 54% of Malaysians disagree that people should be allowed to choose their gender identity, while 20% are undecided.
   
6. 89% of Malaysians agree that more policies are needed to ensure women are not subjected to sexual harassment in any context, including the workplace, universities, and on the street, while 8% remain undecided.
   
7. 53% of Malaysians agree that Women should have the right under the law to make choices relating to their reproductive system and health, including the choice of obtaining an abortion, while 20% disagree that women should have this right under the law.
   
8. 56% of Malaysians agree that all intimate partners should be protected under the law, regardless of whether they are married, while 24% disagree.
   
9. 70% of Malaysians agree that teachers in training should be required to learn about Sex Education, to better educate youngsters, while 13% disagree and 17% remain undecided.

... and many more @ https://vase.ai/data-trust/projects/malaysi.../summary?cues=1

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The study has its limitation as 1000+ respondents do not reflect the overall perception of Malaysia's population. But it does give us some insight at how people think, especially pertaining gender equality and LGBT rights.

This post has been edited by internaldisputes: Sep 18 2020, 10:00 AM

Activist Maryam fights for hijab freedom
Source: https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/...-hijab-freedom/



KUALA LUMPUR: Harassed and placed under investigation by religious authorities, activist Maryam Lee is a controversial figure in Malaysia.

Her crime? Speaking out about her decision to stop wearing the hijab and criticising what she sees as institutional patriarchy in Islam.

Although wearing a “tudung” is not mandatory in Malaysia, experts say the nation has become more conservative in recent years and today most Muslim women wear one.

Maryam, who was made to wear a headscarf from the age of nine, said she realised in her mid-20s that she was conforming to a social expectation rather than a religious requirement and decided to remove it.

“All my life, I had been told that (wearing the headscarf) is mandatory and if I don’t wear it, it’s sinful,” she said.“And then I found out that it actually wasn’t.”

It was a difficult personal decision but when she went public, detailing her story in her book “Unveiling Choice”, she faced a vitriolic backlash and death threats.

The religious authorities expressed concern and she was hauled in for questioning under a law against insulting Islam.

Maryam believes officials were concerned she was encouraging other women to “de-hijab”, but insists this is not the case.

‘Jail of society’s expectation’

“I’m not telling women what to think, I’m asking them to revisit certain assumptions and certain theories that have been taught to them over the years,” said the 28-year-old.

“Even without legal criminalisation, women are facing social criminalisation when they want to take (the hijab) off,” she said, adding that women like her are in a “jail of society’s expectation”.

To mark the release of her book, which she describes as a story of resistance against patriarchy in religion and wider society, she took part in a talk called “Malay Women and De-Hijabbing” which fuelled the furore against her.

Critics say the donning of the hijab was not the case a generation ago and is a result of the greater influence of increasingly vocal religious hardliners.

Maryam has been targeted by angry zealots but has also been hailed as the voice of the modern Malaysian woman by some in the social media generation keen to express their individuality as well as their faith.

‘No less of a Muslim’

“Women in this part of the world, when they take off the hijab, what happens to them? They get bullied, they get harassed,” said Maryam.

Malaysian rights group Sisters of Islam agree women without headscarves come under heavy scrutiny from family, colleagues and in public, making the decision “difficult and traumatic”.

Maryam said her choice was to step away from patriarchal instruction rather than her faith.

“I was born a Muslim, I’m still a Muslim. I’m no less of a Muslim because I removed my hijab,” she said.

Sarah, a consultant from a financial firm who gave a pseudonym to avoid upsetting her family, no longer wears the headscarf believing it to be a patriarchal expectation.

“Malay men especially at an authoritative level somehow have this mindset that Malay women need to appear in a certain manner, but it doesn’t mean that these people who are wearing tudung are any better,” she said.

Religious authorities have yet to close their investigation into Maryam, meaning the possibility of further action remains.

But she has no regrets about her decision to open up about her experience. “Society needs to be awakened,” she said.

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Down with the patriarchy!

Any leader here?

What's up?

Don't think we have a leader here. We are are not really that organised.

Mr Gay England epically shuts down transphobes amid pathetic backlash over trans man competing for the title
Source: https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2020/09/21/mr-ga...-stuart-hatton/



Mr Gay England, one of the top beauty pageants in Britain for LGBT+ men, shut down bristling transphobes Thursday (17 September) amid a backlash against a gay trans finalist.

Chiyo Gomes, a 24-year-old drag artist well known among London’s queer performance scene, became a finalist for Mr Gay England 2020 in August.

But what was a cause for celebration quickly saw Gomes caught in the crosshairs of transphobes, determined to stymie his bid to be crowned the winner.

The contest’s organisers took to Twitter to respond to the criticism with a powerful and clear message: “The Mr Gay England cooperation are PROUD to welcome any gay man to compete for one of our national titles.

Shared alongside a picture of the Progress Flag, they added: “In regards to welcoming a trans man into our finals, if you are a trans man you ARE a man. Simples.”

Chiyo Gomes wants to make ‘queerstory’ as first trans Mr Gay England.

Established in 2016, Mr Gay England judges assess the roster of finalists based on an array of criteria, from swimwear to formalwear, as well as an audience vote and a “congeniality” vote – the contestants themselves decide who should win.

Finalists are also judged on how much money they raise for two charities – The Charlie and Carter Foundation for seriously ill children with life-limiting conditions, and the mental health charity The Northern Pride Health Zone.

Mr Gay England’s grand final will be held at Boulevard Theatre, Newcastle Upon Tyne on 1 April 2021.

Being a finalist in a competition traditionally snarled by stale masculine ideals was “major”, Gomes said in a YouTube video tagged alongside his fundraising page.

“Imagine how delicious it would be if we made queerstory and I was the first trans man to win Mr Gay England. To hold that title. To take up that space.”

“It is often the case with change that there will be a ‘push back’ in some form or other,” Stuart Hatton, Mr Gay England’s CEO, told PinkNews.

“But it is through small steps like this that we start to see positive change. Our community is always evolving and developing and is, for the most part, accepting and open.

“We hope those who are critical of our decision will follow the competition and see that by accepting and nurturing all those in our community we can become stronger and more representative.”

Mr Gay England’s statement of solidarity with the trans community and its defiance to secede to transphobes drew praise on Twitter.

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It's really unfortunate how some of LGBT members ourselves are hating on each other. Spread love y'all.

This post has been edited by internaldisputes: Sep 22 2020, 10:58 AM

The Comprehensive Personal Finance and Support Guide for LGBT in Malaysia



Let’s face it: Malaysia is NOT a good place for LGBT individuals to freely express themselves. But no one can choose where they’re born at, can they? Discrimination is sadly common, usually justified by religion.

If you disagree with ‘the LGBT lifestyle’, I ask for your empathy. This is not a ‘guide to be gay’ article, this is a ‘what to do when you need help’ article. Know the distinction. Don’t kick people when they’re down. No religion teaches that.

This article answers the following questions (in order):

1. My family kicked me out after they find out I’m gay / lesbian / bisexual / trans / queer. What can I do?
2. I need to check my STD / HIV / AIDS status and find out where to find information about medical help, treatment and support
3. My colleagues at work are bullying me because of my sexual orientation / gender identity. I need the job. What can I do?
4. I need to talk to someone. What are my options?
5. My gender does not align with the sex I was born with. How can I transition and what kind of expenses can I expect?
6. I can no longer/do not want to stay in Malaysia. What can I do?
7. I am in a committed, if unrecognised relationship with my partner. If anything happens to me, how can make sure she/he can inherit my money and properties?
8. I don’t have immediate problems but would like to prepare myself financially, in case anything happens. What can I do?
9. I’m LGBT individual / ally with financial means. How can I help?

Read the full guide at https://ringgitohringgit.com/commentary/per...bt-in-malaysia/

Wow this is a very good good, will be useful if I ever decide to come back to Malaysia but sadly that seems less and less likely, the country is going down fast.

Where are you now?

Yeah if you're openly gay it's probably wise to not come here for awhile. Anti-LGBT sentiment is on the rise.

#tetapbangga angkat LGBT, menteri perlu segera bertindak
Source: https://ismaweb.net/2020/09/22/tetapbangga-...gera-bertindak/



BANGI, 4 Safar 1442H, Selasa – Para menteri dan ahli politik diingatkan untuk tidak berdiam diri dengan kehadiran tanda pagar #tetapbangga yang tular di media sosial ketika ini kerana didakwa mengangkat golongan lesbian, gay, biseksual dan transgender (LGBT).

Ahli Mahasiswa BERJASA (WIBAWA), Ain Shahadon berkata, pemimpin berkenaan perlu menggunakan kuasa yang dimiliki untuk mengimplimentasi dasar-dasar negara dengan telus.

“Jangan gentar dengan suara pelampau hak kebebasan kerana perkara ini jelas mencabul ketelusan Perlembagaan Persekutuan dan Rukun Negara,” katanya dalam kenyataan, hari ini.

Di laman sosial Twitter, tanda pagar #tetapbangga ditentang oleh netizen dengan menggunakan hashtag baharu iaitu #tetapnormal.

Mengulas lanjut, Ain berkata, #tetapbangga yang trending itu menjadi bukti bahawa penyakit tiru gaya barat dalam masyarakat sedang membarah.

Beliau secara sinis berkata, ‘ubat’ perlu diberikan segera supaya barah berkenaan tidak terus merebak dan mungkin boleh dihentikan seratus peratus.

“Di dalam al-Quran turut dijelaskan kesan daripada perbuatan songsang yang turut dilakukan oleh kaum Nabi Lut A.S. Janganlah kita mengundang lebih masalah di dalam negara ini dengan membiarkan pengaruh-pengaruh barat terus merebak.

“Watan ini mempunyai prinsip budaya ketimuran yang dikekalkan. Watan ini mempunyai dasar-dasar negara yang lengkap dijalankan. Watan ini mempunyai kehormatan yang perlu didaulatkan,” katanya.

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People are triggered over a simple pro-LGBT hashtag on Twitter.

I never really came out as bisexual, and the invisibility can sting
Source: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2...ility-can-sting



I never really had to come out as bisexual, because honestly, it just never came up.

I’ve dated women before, and told a handful of my friends and my immediate family, so it’s not like it’s a secret, but my only two long-term relationships have been with men, so most people just assume I’m straight. (In fairness, the frilly dresses and obsession with Timothée Chalamet probably lure people into a false sense of heterosexuality as well.) It’s often easier just not to correct them.

I do have a trick for when I want to let people know. I have a trilogy of bad dates I went on between my relationships, and I fire them off in quick succession.

“The first guy turned out to have a secret son, the second dude got way too annoyed at me for not reading enough books, and the last one, she turned up to a date black-out drunk.”

It’s a “blink and you might miss it” pronoun revelation. Everyone is too afraid to ask, for fear that they might have just misheard.

Having never been in a serious relationship with a woman I’ve never been forced to have those difficult conversations with my extended family, or compose an Instagram post declaring my identity. Because I never had to, I never did. I’ve certainly reaped the benefits of that decision, but it isn’t without consequences.

When 23 September rolls around and “bi-visibility day” posts fill my social media feed, it makes me feel strange, because I know my own actions, and a society with a long history of heteronormativity have combined to make me almost invisible.

Being part of the LGBTQ+ community has never really felt like something within my grasp. I say to myself, I haven’t struggled like everyone else did. No one has ever told me I’m going to hell for loving my partner, or glared at me for holding his hand. So in a way, claiming to be one of them makes me feel like a fraud.

I went through all the emotional turmoil, self-hatred and unrequited love in high school to be part of the club, but then it’s almost like I’ve let my membership card expire.

And bisexuality is different to being gay in a lot of ways. There is far less culture and language or established identities to gravitate towards. Besides tucking in my shirt, cuffing my jeans and loudly listening to the song Sweater Weather there isn’t much I can do to “connect with my people”. “Bi-culture” is slowly developing, but sometimes it still feels like the most cohesive common experience we have is people dismissing bi-men as gay and bi-women as experimenting.

Having only been in relationships with men, even other LBGTQ+ people I have come out to have their blind spots when it comes to my sexuality. Proudly gay people have proclaimed themselves to be the “only queer person in the room” as my boyfriend squeezes my hand because he knows it bothers me. Other bisexual women have had me cornered at a party explaining how I “wouldn’t understand their experience”. It’s a first-world problem, but it still stings.

There is also a part of me that’s afraid that if I’m too loud about my identity, people will think I don’t love my boyfriend. When you are bi or pansexual, but in a relationship, the very act of defining that part of your identity is highlighting the fact that there are other people that you could possibly be attracted to. My incredibly supportive boyfriend isn’t fazed by that, but I still worry about the world judging our partnership as less worthy and less pure.

The other problem with never really having come out is you also never really have to deal with your own ingrained hatred of your sexuality. In all honesty, a large part of the reason I never posted about it to social media is the fear of seeming cringeworthy. “Honestly,” I would say to myself, “who really gives a shit?”

There have been times that I have told people I’m bi and they reply, “Oh, well who isn’t?” I’m sure they were trying to make the (very valid) argument that everyone falls somewhere along the sexuality spectrum, but all that turn of phrase achieves is compounding my feeling that if I “come out” people would just think I’m seeking attention.

Bi representation on TV is slowly getting better with Brooklyn 99, Crazy Ex Girlfriend and even reality shows Vanderpump Rules featuring characters and cast members explicitly defining themselves as bisexual, but this still in far from the norm.

Actor Kristen Bell confirmed her character in the Good Place, Elenor, was bi in an interview but said they didn’t need that to be “harped on” or made explicit in the show.

Often on TV the best you get is half a line about “sexuality being a spectrum” and their identity remains unnamed and unexplained. It’s almost like the word bisexual is a bit passé or uncool. So, in turn, I’ve always been embarrassed to use it.

The raging pit of internalised biphobia within me would look at other people brandishing their sexual identity and wonder why they don’t just be a bit more low key about it like me. It’s easy to pass off being semi-closeted as just being socially progressive sometimes. It’s also easy to use derision to hide your own green envy of others’ capacity for self-acceptance.

I wouldn’t change my relationship for anything, but I shouldn’t feel like I have to in order to validate my identity.

Being invisible and quiet and oh-so-casually surfing the “heterosexual until proven otherwise” wave is easy. It served me well for a while but now it feels like I’m enforcing the very social pressures that have silenced me since I was teenager.

So, with that being said, this bi visibility day feels as good as any to decide for myself that my LGBTQ+ membership card has been renewed.

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Being a purely gay person, I never realised the internal struggles by bi people. This article is really eye-opening.

It's one day late but Happy Bi-Visibility Day, everyone!