for me, if you have urges, it's normal..
Maybe you're still young, so you still have it,
I think you shouldn't feel so guilty after sexual intercourse..just don't do it too often and always practice safe sex

it is not wrong to make mistakes or two when you're young,
it is wrong when you make mistakes or two when you are old and have children you gotta be an example to.

I always go out and break some rules, I got into trouble few times but that's alright, things got fixed, I learned so many lessons..
Cause I know when I grow up to be a parent, I got to have all these unspeakable knowledge..haha

I have fail to control myself. I nearly 'did' it with a not so close fren. N i stop coz feeling so guilty, yes very high, but my guilt reli controlling me. I did ask him again to continue, but then i have to stop again, coz i feel it is so bad/dirty/naughty of me.

Not only i am incapable of controlling my ownself, i am feeling kind of useless coz flirting with him also. I know nothing wrong if i want it and just do it. The issue is i want it but at the same time, i cannot do it. That's the issue.

After we separate, i still feel the urge is so so strong. What is wrong with me? I am feeling frustrated of myself. It is like u want something, u can get it, but my feeling is very guilty/dirty/no dignity. N also worried about the consequences (pregnancy/STD).

I dun want ONS/FUBU/with a close or not close fren also i dun want. I dunno what i want also. It is so frustrating.

hey, just 2 make sure that I'm a male,..,but have you try meditation before??

my experience: usually i like 2 fap, well....not very hardcore because my frequency of doing it is nearly minimum of 3 times per week. I've seen friends do more than that ......but i feel guilty afterwards...

& what i did is i meditation, .....,just sit down & find a comfy quiet room & if you like, you can also use peaceful music 2 accompany your meditation......no need too much just 10-15mins per day enough

and i already success in stop fapping for 2 weeks in total, today is my 15th days of no masturbate, even with the presence of "hot video' shared by my friend....

try meditation,..., it really helps

Get some sex toys maybe?

if you really feel dirty having sex, I suggest you occupy yourself with activities throughout your day. Plan, plan, and plan your activities beforehand. You said it yourself when you are busy your urge will drop drastically. So, get busy.

Could it be because of your religion background that you feel that sex is dirty? Because like all the other forum members have said here, we are living in an age where sex is regarded as a normal activity (unfortunately). Just remember to play safe if you decide to do you, wouldn't want unwanted pregnancies and STD's etc.

If all these things don't work, perhaps a FUBU would be beneficial for you. Not ONS, those are too random and well, more dangerous. That's why FUBU culture exists, to help people like you to well, satisfy some aspects of their life, without the emotional attachment. Or better yet, find yourself an actual boyfriend. (I know it's been discussed previously but I'd like to remind you of the possibility).

Of course, I highly suggest occupying yourself with beneficial activities (i.e. Self improvement) before all the other suggestions.

I've been on a FUBU myself and apart from controlling your own emotional attachments, is pretty darn fun being able to call someone and just have sex. Not just cause I'm a guy, but it feels more like there is one aspect of your life that you don't have to worry about.

I am ok to masturbate. Just not ok if the urge is controlling me, and not the opposite way. It is getting uncontrollable nowadays. At first i am so confident that i can settle it. But actually up till now, i am still finding for solution, i unable settle this issue. The solution is with my mind and willpower, but easier said than done.

U meant vibrator? I bought vibrator before, but dun enjoy it. Other suggestion of sex toys?

Haha, the way u describe FUBU is like so funny. Call her and she appears and both of u did the 'business' and go separate way.
I know u suggesting me to be busy. I am a very busy person most of the time. But when i am free, i cannot just go on and on creating plans for myself just to avoid me from doing the wrong thing. I dun think it is a permanent solution. It is a good suggestion, just if i keep bz, but it just meant that i cannot control myself when i m free. I dun have a great willpower, no good discipline.

Get an actual bf? Well, i dun think i want find bf because i want to have sex. I think for now, I will follow Munkeyflo ways, just need to do some research on what toys to buy.

well....you say you OK with masturbate..... but i wonder whether which affect your control of your urge at the end of day: frequency of masturbate or types of toys??

maybe, just maybe if you try masturbate more when your urge is higher on certain days as in 2 "release' it,, then probably you'll be okay gua....

Well I guess it depends what really gets you off. Some are satisfied with just clitoral stimulation, some need more.

Get a few toys, I'm sure you know where to get there reliably by now. Try them out and see what you like.

You realize in your case Raymond in first page hit it on the spot.
It's not much physical, more like a psychological thing. I know a few girls like you, the way everyone cope is different. It's all about reconciliation isn't it, but quite impossible for you. So next would be compartmentalization.

ts need to stop watching korean drama

hit the gym during your free time, I am sure you will be too tired to think about sex after that