bro this is depression

i had it for a while

pass by a doctor

I believe you have either :

Suicidal ideation, or

Suicidal Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (SOCD)


You should see a psychiatrist, or psychologist.. The GP who simply told you
not to ''dwell on it'' is naive and knows little about the complex psychology of suicide.

Preferable see one who is trained in hypnosis. Dr Cheah Wing Yin in Sunway
Medical Center is one.


Suicidal ideation.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicidal_ideation



People with OCD are at high risk of suicide.


Suicidal behavior in obsessive-compulsive disorder.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18052568



Suicide often not preceded by warnings.

http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/suicide...gs-201209245331



Suicide Obsessions: Fear of Killing/Harming Yourself.

http://www.steveseay.com/suicide-obsession...lling-yourself/




Some drugs, or sudden withdrawal from, particularly the SSRIs, can
also trigger off spontaneous suicide or suicidal thoughts.

Have you been on any of these drugs , such as Prozac, Zoloft or Effexor ?

Effexor, being an SNRI and blocks both serotonin and noradrenaline, is
in particular associated with a high risk of suicide on sudden withdrawal.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venlafaxine#Suicide

yeah, TS may not be revealing what maybe troubling him.

Although I never have suicidal thoughts, but I read with great interest in this topic and would like to share some of my thoughts.

Firstly, it is possible TS have a medical condition that can be treated with drugs.

Secondly, I think relationships with friends and family play an very important role in a person's life in their motivation to live/die. How much other people care for and interact with the person and how much the person care for and interact with others will determine his outlook in life. That's why even TS mentioned that he felt better after interacting with those that responded to this tread. Although we are strangers, he may feel that there are people who cared enough to interact with him to encourage him not to commit suicide. Most of us work and do things not only for ourselves but also for our spouse/family and children. Our goal in life is to make people we care for be happy and in turn are happy when others does the same for us too. If this is missing, some people may feel an emptiness in life. People who do not feel appreciated are usually unhappy and unmotivated.
The reason some people may not have strong relationships or any relationships with others maybe because they lack social aptness but yet strongly desire social acceptance and this will cause unhappiness in them and may cause them to want to commit suicide.(or worse... going on a killing rampage before taking their own life)

Thirdly, it is also possible TS may have a psychological problem that maybe can be solved by understanding how TS see himself and the world. I find most people who commit suicide is because they cannot accept certain things in their life or that has happened in their. And this is usually tied to their expectations of an issue or multiple of issues or life in general. Acceptance is the key. A person not being able to accept what they have no control over eg how they look/their body shape is just setting themselves up for unhappiness. In terms of things we may have some control, we may try our best to achieve whatever we want/desire but if it doesn't turn out to be what we expect, acceptance must come in. Being able to move on is just as important.
Life is not perfect nor it is fair. Never has been and never will be. ACCEPT THAT. In life, shit happens and often we do not get to choose how we want things to turn out. But we can always try our best and be persistent. But if it doesn't happen, ACCEPT IT. Failure is part of life just as success is.

Lastly, I would like to ask TS wheather did he ask himself WHY does he think of suicide thoughts. And also ask himself WHY he may want to live until he is old. Does TS not have any goals/wishes in his life that he may want to achieve but has yet to?

We are all going to die anyway. To the suicidal person, he may say, why not sooner? But also, why not later? To me, at the very least, to indulge in life's little pleasures until your body cannot take it anymore.

At some point there's no harm at all to seek for professional help. The glance felling or dark whispering to suggest such multiple method of things that not suppose to do will pop up anytime, especially once you alone or not tied up with proper activities. Just have a good diversion and focus for what you do best.

Get social moderately and don't put too high expectation on others.
Filling your live with proper mix between routine daily task and good leisure.
Write down positive note and cherish with that. It's Ok to 'syok sendiri' sometime.
Feel free to have personal research toward certain psychology story, understanding the scenario and symptoms as well the way people tackle it. Just don't drag yourself toward mixed and match the findings that consequently reflecting yourself; just appreciate and enjoy of knowing things.

Just checking in, TS, you havent responded in the thread for a while now.

Hope all's well.

Yeah, suicide or whether it is self-immolation will never help other/society - it will just prone the mental-instability to copy cat. Protester/activist can help the society by trying hard to create awareness, to deter depressed people from taking "shortcuts" or forced-shut-down.

i got respect for this guy here : Matthew Silver is real good artist - makes you laugh and thats good karma all the way..
check it out : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0gjkRkl4z4

That is the answer to your question.
Depression is a serious issue and many people do not understand the consequences of this issue,At least in msia.
Psychologist is the one person that can help you but you should seek out to meet 3- or 4 of them.

That will give a better idea to your problem.