I did a rap song during Teachers Day, forgot the lines and got booed off stage

Scarred me for life

Ok many years ago, when I was in Diploma and still stupid..

One day I attend the livestock class , that day we have some lab work to do. The assignment is to slaughter a kambing and then take out its organ to do some lab work. Really pity that kambing, need to die just because of our lab work.

Then after the kambing die, the uncle lab assistant (who have a typical butcher look) took out the kambing organ for us to take pic and do notes. Suddenly that uncle put one batang one the table to let us see, since I cannot recognize what organ is that and didn't saw from where he took that thing out, so I also ask him: Ini organ apa ah? (what organ is this?)... The uncle reply me: Ini batang kambing (this is goat's peniss).. since my bahasa is very lauyah that time so i also don't understand and keep asking: apa itu batang ah?... because I tot its like counting satu batang, dua batang.. and teacher said if not understand then must keep asking so I also keep asking him: Ini apa batang? apa batang Ini... then the uncle lab assistant lost his patient and said: Ini lanjiao kambing la... lanjiao tau? Tau apa itu lanjiao?!

I was like speechless and fcuking embarrassssssssing that time and I think I was fcuking really pissed him off that time.

last time during coll days i take bus.

i was wearing khaki shorts that day n as usual i sit right at the back. there was grease on the seat n i din know. basically look like shit colour. n kena right in the middle of my ass. so it looked like i terberak in my shorts. i onli realize when my fren pass me a pack of tissue n ask me to go clean myself.

so i went to toilet n got the shock of my life. i really tot i sat on someone else's shit. but after a sniff confirm its just grease. unfortunately cant get the grease off so for one whole day ppl keep asking me if i know got shit stain on my shorts. to make things worst my t shirts also kena some so it really looked like i terberak