Also TS, how old are your kids? Newborn? Already studying?

Just fyi education fees also not cheap nowadays if you opt for private school, private college / uni

Maybe tell your wife the savings is for the children's future as well, maybe she could understand better that way. Do not say it is for YOUR retirement....

Most of male spending is in survival mode whereby female is know how to be living life mode.

I've tried discussing our financial priorities with my wife several times, but our conversations have ended in frustration for both of us.

I've explained that saving for our retirement is crucial to avoid burdening our children in future. However, she insist that we can save without sacrificing our entertainment and lifestyle.

How to save without sacrificing our lifestyle?

This is how we ended up frustration.

This post has been edited by Lonelybird: Jan 21 2025, 08:56 PM

You both need to reach a middle ground / compromise

You cannot expect to maximise savings suddenly and take away her enjoyment she expected from you

Likewise she should support you as well assuming the justification you provided are valid

Rm8k where waifu is a full time house wife and kids somewhere, you really are stretching every cents hard.

I suggest drawing an Excel table and list out how much you have, how much you can accumulate 10 years down the road. You can quote my Hokkien Mee Index together with your Excel to show her our monies are losing value fast.

Of course, you can set aside a small budget on monthly basis for eating out, keeping waifu happy.

At the mean time, maybe consider a side hustle for extra income.

8k can have wife and savings?

maybe if wife also working

This post has been edited by h@ksam: Jan 21 2025, 09:22 PM

RM8K gross is just ngam ngam for a couple without children, living in Klang Valley. Mana cukup for kids education until uni and for your retirement (for two).

TS, you need to seriously consider budgeting and sticking to it strictly.
Get the wife working if possible.

Can if we adjust lifestyle.

I can save 2k a month with 8k salary.

But now my wife not happy, i might reduce saving.

Make a spreadsheet track all the spending.
Set aside abit for "entertainment/vacation".

Discuss how much need to save every month. need to be hasty to decide what is the amount, just go along and adjust until both comfortable with the amount.

Don't forget about yearly expenses such as quit rent, taxes, road tax, car/house insurance.

Last but not least, set aside abit for "emergency" use.


Once u have everything in-place u can how how much to spend and how much to save.

if you've already a retirement number to achieve and lowering down that number would cause lower quality of lifestyle, then can try show it to her and let her know that you guys are living on future money..

Personally if you have a solid plan for financial freedom or comfortable living, good to just stick to it if you can and dont let that go. Wife's who does not understand you or crave for excitement always at the expense of future, nothing is tying them up with you as they can leave you for someone else with the reason that you don't make enough to support their lifestyle + cant make them happy.

You might end up losing her and your future retirement.

Again no harm trying to talk sense with your wife first... show some calculations in figures...

1st rule is never tell people your actual salary... always report less... to everyone else around you even your close ones... at least the differences can be saved for your ownself for use or silent investments..

6k is a lot, no? Saving 2k is about right

dont ever let ur wife touch ur savings

tats a sure way of ending up sleeping on the streets

just giv her what u are willing to lose

6K/month can say alot can say not much becoz depending where u staying and how old is your children(s)?

2K savings is quite good.
I dont see any issue if take 500 from the savings pool for vacation like once a quarter year.

You are being sensible. She is being entitled. She buys what she wants with her own money. Settle.


Retirement she eat into ur portion due to her inability to plan is worse

Can give examples of fine things in life that she ask for?

Latest iPhone? Omakase? Luxury bag?

Go Singkie, you easily save 2k SGD per month or more if you’re in frugal mode.

The ability to save is only a small portion of the financial literacy. If you know how to save but don’t know how to utilise the fund, then what is the use of the saved fund ?

You mentioned your wife financial literacy is almost zero. If you do not allow her to start now, then when is the suitable time?

There are ppl who seek to gain experience by utilising every single fund accessible by them ( own saving or other ppl money ), they didn’t fear to try anything to reach their goal. Yet majority ppl are chained by the “fear”, fear of losing the hard earned saving and forgoing the financial experience they will gains.

Convert the resources you have to the “experience” both of you needed to manage your family finance. Once you gained the needed experience, the question you ask will disappear on it owns in the near future. To solve the problem , solve the core of the problem not the surface symptoms.

1) wife is always right.
2) refer to 1)

Or an analogy. Say a djinn offer you RM1million, but you need to spend the rest of your life in the most hellish place imaginable and never being able to smile again - would you take the offer?

And here i am leaving a higher paying job than ts and venturing into a totally unknown territory for me.
Live life once.

I got all the Cs, Company, Condos , Car, Cash , Crypto , Credit Card , Country club, you name it

Yet my wife still say I’m shit to her standard.

Woman never happy

Don’t get married , but for you too late like me

If you don’t have kids dump her

This post has been edited by GoodBoy2022: Jan 21 2025, 10:12 PM