Today a friend talked about forgiveness. He said if his partner cheated on him once, he will forgive her but he will leave. He feels that leaving the toxic relationship is a way to forgive a person.

In my argument, it's more to just finding an easy way out of things.

What do you all think? Can you all totally forgive a cheater?

Yes I would, but find it hard to forget.

Put yourself in her shoes. If you love your gf, but you cheated on a hot colleague, can you be forgiven or trusted not to repeat that again? Personally I won’t forgive myself as if I’ve cheated, meaning I didn’t value my girl enough. Vice versa.

Life is short to be calculating so much. Can then move on, Kenot then leave. Less drama more action. U won’t know when is your last day.

Leave is the best solution. Because if you stay in this relationship there will always be this baggage. Eventually this burden will get too heavy to bare.

Each goes their way, next time meet again can still be friends.

This post has been edited by darksideofthemoon: Jul 24 2023, 01:21 AM

if you are a high sex drive person, just have an open serious relationship or marriage. If you have talk out your needs before marriage it will save you a lot of problem future, ie potential sexual dissatisfaction, lack of sex because frequently seeing each other

The main problem most guys cannot accept their girlfriend or wife cheating (emotionally flirting, but mostly physical) because we have fear of potential raising unknown guy's kids. What if your serious gf flirt with guys obviously in front of you? Then you should question why you picked her as main chick.

Cheater also need backup love boy

Just maintain few gf, main gf, backup gf and spare gf.

If they are all turn out just as good, how? How do you decide who to let go? Somebody bound to get hurt . I can't bare to see ladies cry. The guilt will eat you up if you have a conscience.

One at a time....bah.

Forgive then leave the relationship. I am sure its hard to build the trust and will be walking on eggshells later on.

But how you forgive when you already left? It's like you say forgive but you still feel the hurt from the cheating. That's not forgiving.

You have to forgive the person. The forgiveness can come instant or later on. But staying in the relationship is fool hardy. The hurt will always be there, regardless if you have a new gf or partner.

Forgiving is making a mental stand to say this will have minimum impact to your life. If you dont forgive, it will manifest to hate then other issues. Forgive her, forgive yourself, leave the relationship and give space to heal.

Everyone heals differently but will heal in the end. Forgiveness is the first step.

Typical human behaviour, when people hurt you, you wanna hurt back. Sometimes to extremes. And sometimes with regrettable actions. Im sure you dont want that.

The issue is there are lot of people are not equipped to be monogamous either they forced themselves to quickly find a partner ended up cheating (cause they settled for minimum)

they dont know what they want inherently
thats why being a player is crucial. If you dont play the field you will not know who's truly compatible with you. There are also guys who just married their high school (very rare) or college gf after being together for many years, ended up divorce as well. Life is unpredictable

Its bad to follow social conditionings
But if they want to be a sheep, that's fine

I never had a cheater in my life and I never wish I would, if me then I would definitely leave the cheater and no forgiveness for her. I love you for who you are, yet you go messing around with some other dude then expect me to forgive you?

They said forgive but not forget, well I won't give neither to a cheater.

Depends on the reason of the cheat... If it was because he/she have a sex drive that I couldn't satisfy, I think I can forgive. But if it's more emotional (he/she fell in love with the other person), then I'd just have a clean break.

agree, women tie sex with love a lot. If she decides to give herself mentally to someone its about time to hook up, she already chose to leave the bf or husband long time ago (disrespect), but its just an explanation from a traditionalist standpoint.

What if she is lieing about emotions part but actually got? How can you tell?

thats you vet a woman or guy when you want to do anything serious or business with them

Make them all happy, at least sponsor their life.

Living cost not cheap these day.

Wouldn't, couldn't and shouldn't. Speaking of personal experience and its very different for men and women.