it's been a rollercoaster ride...long story short, i hurt my gf again for bringing up topics about the guy who she lost her first time to...the guy left for singapore for good 2 months ago. apparently, she is/was very attached to this guy due to reasons only chicks would understand

the first time i hurt her, i was using her computer i saw some entries she made in her blog, not knowing that the blog was not meant for public access. her entries was about how she couldn't forget her first man with pictures and song lyrics yada yada.... i confronted her and she denied everything and got very upset for the fact the i "pried" her privacy. i totally forget about my sadness and quickly turn to cheer her up.

next day, bought a soft toy and a card for her and things went good after a while

but lately, we went out to some places and she told me about her memories with that guy exactly a year ago, it starts to make me uneasy but i tried to keep it to myself as i dont wana bring up things she doesnt like to hear. over the few days, she even changed her msn taglines to "remembering the times" or "it was then" etc

even worse i saw her writing some sort of "diaries" on some word docs. this time, i didn't had the trust in her seeing that she's been denying things that i've seen with my own eyes months ago...i opened it up and i was never wrong. lately she's been listening to the song "you should be happy", she said in the "diary" that she is still wondering whether the guy is happy yada yada...here's another catch, i had been quite sensitive to the songs she's been listening to cuz it realy felt like she's not over him yet but as usual, she always deny and say i'm too sensitive

i dont hav a lot of ppl to talk to, eventually i talked to a close friend of mine, as well as my ex, who we still shares our close friendship...ppl advice me to dump her since i'm not happy with the relationship as well as not trusting her...i thought carefully for the whole day, shed my tears for the first time since i broke up w/ my ex a year ago

i decided to talk it out with her, hoping she can shed me some light herself and works things out....but then again, she denied everything. this time, i brought up the topic that i hav been keeping to myself all these times. i told her what i've seen with my own eyes on her blog before but she kept saying that those were before we even started goin out, mind you, i know the dates, i wont get that wrong

i dont know why, when she gets upset again, i was deciding whether to drop the sledge hammer or to salvage what i have. in that split second, i have decided to keep her. i dont know why am i so attached to her even though i know she's lying, i think i'd rather listen to what she said than what i've seen

sigh...i was writing this to ask girls out there ways to show her my sincere apology especially i dont feel like doing the same thing as before and thinking gifts and cards can buy her off...but i got carried away and starts writing half of the story

You have some wise friends there. My advice would be the same as well.

am i too sensitive about that guy? is this normal to girls who lost their first time? i know i'm sick of her emotional baggage and i can't agree more w/ yours and my mate's advice...but most of the time, i believe in decision i have to make in a split second because contemplating didn't help at all...thanks but i've already made up my mind...i just wana cheer her up

i dont know why i'm so attached to her. as if i've never had better relationships...maybe i'm just afraid of change

bro, i feel you..i have the same situation as you..

but again, if you have done all your thing to make her happy, yet she don't appreciate you, let her go, you deserve a better 1

cheer up bro..cheer up...

insecurity, that's what drive all of the couple go crazy, from my POV she is hoping that her ex to be with her, while in another hand your are just her back up if her plan get back fire. So instead of pressuring her to tell the truth, why not talk to her to choose either one of you btw the last resort is also break up cause sometimes people are not meant together, cheers

Girls always remember their first time, there's nothing that you can do about it.

how long you both been together bro..my situation also kind of worse..her ex still call her and they still talk to each other, although she talk infront of me and give not much expression on her ex..i still feel the hurt and the pears to my heart sometime...i also just keep it to myself..all i want to give is to make her happy..

ok...i was so carried away but i forget 1 important bit...all these things happened, 1 thing i never doubt is that she loves me, i'm never wrong in this one cuz i know how to see....she might not be 100% opened up to me, i'm never sure

i dont think there's anything i could do to cheer her up and let her forget her past, i was hoping that we could talk something out and maybe we could do something to each other but it only ended sadly...again

so...i can say loudly that I AM DEFINITELY NOT HER REBOUND...or maybe.....a rebound that she fell in love...

*sigh*

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Added on October 6, 2007, 12:58 pmwe've been dating since april...didn't officialise it until august (chicks always want the official stamp to certify our death certificate)

ok, u can feel whether she's emotional when she's talking to/about her ex.....put it this way...i would mention about my ex to her as a friend eg. oh, we've been to this restaurant before, it's great, lets try it. period. whereas, hers is more like, ahh...this restaurant, that was our first date, the atmosphere....

she does mention about her ex back in malaysia or other flings, i have no problems with it as there's no emotional baggage carried with her

This post has been edited by vintec: Oct 6 2007, 12:58 PM

in my opinion,
i suggest you to dump her...
why?
because she is not being sincere and truthful to you...
she is hiding smth from you...
Dont feel sad about it...
its now her problem not yours...
she cant accept the fact that you knew what was going on...
and try to make you take to her side...
think wise

crap...still dont know how to show her i'm deeply regret....the best way is to prove it but i want to giv her an assurance

read my post above ler bro... but if you are too in love with her then nobody can tell you what to do...

oh fark i found u are such wussy man, despite of what the forummer suggest u just ignore them completely. good for you keep it up and ktnxbanxfjiasfjafiawe[

You have decide how much that you can take, if you can't accept the fact that she's still in love with the other guy, give up.

Or

Be a hero!

If u're so minded about she losing her 1st time, why in the 1st place u get hooked up with her?

Btw, who did u gave your 1st time to?

If u mind her losing her 1st time but its not to u, what about u huh?

What is done, is done....no point digging it out....

Nothing wrong to remember back the memories....its not easy to forget the 1st time...
Let bygones be bygones.....

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Added on October 6, 2007, 1:07 pmRemembering and loving is a different thing...
What u wish would happened and what u want now is too a different thing..

This post has been edited by WaCKy-Angel: Oct 6 2007, 01:07 PM

It's her problem for not getting over her ex. Not yours.

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Added on October 6, 2007, 1:12 pmu got it all wronggggggggggg...i didnt care about the past, it's just that she still misses him...i asked about the first time issue becuz i really wana know if it's so significant to girls...i mean she todl me she'd already moved on

This post has been edited by vintec: Oct 6 2007, 01:13 PM

first of all...
your title doesnt suit the story...
then...
your story doesnt suit your point...

yeah dude dont trust girls like that
my ex still calls me and even once told me that heck she doesnt mind having an affair with even if she is married..

sishh...real looney

ok sorry...i got so carried away in the first place...i added the story so that u guys can get a better picture...obviously, it didnt

sigh...i still think beign dumped is better, u dont hav choice, u move on, dumping ppl is harder, cuz u decide when and where it ends and there's no point of return

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Added on October 6, 2007, 1:15 pmi like ur siggy, suiteng XD

This post has been edited by vintec: Oct 6 2007, 01:15 PM

haha....
of coz lor...
you are gonna hurt peoples feelings mar...
dumping AND being dumped is never easy...