I am 29 years old, married with one child. Education only SPM level without relevant working experiences.

I am here trying to source for any light in my world of darkness although i know i screw up and don’t deserve pitiness.

I was feeling suicidal frequently and started to be physical abusive toward my wife. Wife isn’t supporting enough and isn’t reliable during my tough time, even destroyed much hope of survival for me. I might also end up a single father soon without career and education. Everyday i hope that i would’nt wake up from my sleep.

My family business had been shut down since a years ago and my dad is now a bankrupt. I spend my entire 20s playing games which made me now a introvert. I do have some basic experience in web coding, managing servers, server security as i own a private game server.

However, i do not have passion in coding. I think it is boring and i can’t do it longterm, server security may still interest me but i am not very sure on that and I do have interest in automation machine such as those in manufacture factory.

Luckily, i still have around 150k of savings without debt.

I understand that i can start simple business such as hawker stall, as i do not fear hard labour. But i am a lot more interested in having a stable paycheck monthly. I also can’t do sales as i can’t speak fluently.

The question is, if i were to go back to study, can anyone suggest some of the university courses that can help me to have high chance to secure a job, and have still have a bright career prospect at the age of 34?

Given the fact that i wasted my 20s and the current economy situation, should i just give up the idea of studying and venture into basic business like hawker instead, since i know for a fact that most if not all the employer will just toss the resume of a 34yr freshman without working experience into the trashcan.

Or can anyone suggest me some of alternative path that i can take at the age of 29? I am very lost here and would greatly appreciate if any of you could share some knowledge to help me.

Thank you very much in advance Mr/Mrs.

call befrienders, dont give up, at least u have 150k savings without debt..

Maybe you can go out look for a simple job first and gain some experience before starting your own business. Or do some grab gig to earn some money

you are better off than most of the people.

150k savings better off than those with degrees
hawker is good idea, but is your food good?

dont give up. if its me, i wouldn't return to study. at least for now. maybe like you said, try hawker business. but please don't spend too much for the modal. try start small and take it from there.

and please don't give the excuse of wife not supporting to abuse her. i bet you would also blame her if she left you.

i am interested to know what you are working as now? and your working experience.

Please learn good virtues. Never hit your wife. Are you a hot tempered person?

Firstly, congratulation for saving up for the rainy days and not having debt!

Not many people are well off as this.

It seems like you are just temporarily lost of direction, it is normal and it is part of life.

I'm almost the same age but having debt yet jobless at the moment, my savings if not even half as yours.
Anyhow I decided to take a break just to reposition my direction.

I would say, there are never "bad economy", it's just "bad industry".
Considering you are already in the IT field with some skillset available, take it step by step. This is a good way to start.

+1, this is very important to take note
no manner which party is right or wrong

wife is our own choice end of the day

If you want average monthly paycheck study is the only way to go.

However, the paycheck probably still low compare to your previous living standard.

The only messages I get from you is no passion, not interested, and etc so I can only think of basic business.

Are you interested in esports? Not as a player of course. Tournament manager etc.

bro, if you need someone to listen to you too, please open up a thread. I will support you.

Unless u are still passionate in further studies, suggest you to venture into doing sales. It is nonetheless a stressful job but which job is not. Doing sales, you will expose to more real time events and meet different sorts of people and some who might inspire you

What are u looking for

You have child to raise. You are 29 years old.
So education alone won't help you on financial

I would say suck up and apply for some job IT related and have a stable work and in the same time part time study to upgrade yourself.

Not easy road but don't give up

Don't abuse your wife. If you think you're bad to your wife have that cause your negativity. Divorce. For her and your own good.

She own u nothing to be frank.

You probably have your answer, to continue study, you would stuck at financial issue very soon. Unless you feel safe to go study without worries much.

You may set a target if you proceed to go Hawker stall, how much you want to earn? for how ling? do first and if it get the result you want, why not. you could get your answer very fast, if you confident...
Nothing great abt education unless you have it planned. Is all abt money when comes to life and living.

Or just apply for IT job, whichever pay more.

If u have good server troubleshooting and know abit security can apply server technical support. Start low, and later climb.

Its never too late to do something. Also i advise try to let ur anger elsewhere, example playing sport. Idk what is your problem with your wife but something that your wife did is a reflection of your to guide your marriage.

Don't overthink and compare with other ppl, start with what feels safe to you (IT) rather than hawker.

Sometimes its possible to dislike the thing that is good for you (your wife) and love a thing that is bad for you (in your case waste time in your 20s)

I'm fortunate to say I'm doing good so far considering we are in the pandemic, choice is in our hand after all.

It's not my turn to raise flag yet and I hope it won't be my turn

Appreciate for taking care the lyn members, /k/ members and Malaysians.
Thank you for the support, a small caring step could meant a huge impact.

This post has been edited by potatobanana: Aug 23 2021, 02:07 AM

Dont give up. Understand that the current pandemic poses a challenge to all and everyone is going through a tough time.

You are still young. Maybe you can try to go for any intern jobs in coding or web design.

One thing that my ex-boss taught me is this. Even if it's not your passion, do it until you get the next breakthrough. Dont have to leap but baby step.

if you want to start a business, dont just dump all ur money. Do market research and find out whats is the current trend. You can always start selling on lazada or if you want to cook and sell, try it. No harm. As always Youtube is available, learn how to market via google AdSense or Facebook ads.

My key point is never to stop learning. If Higher education is expensive, invest on certs and also hone your skills via the youtube channel. Take a subject of your interest and complete it.. People now need experience more than a degree (of course it is important, do it when u have time and money)

Please please don't ever think about suicidal thoughts. Think of your kids, They need you.

For anger, do yoga. Calm yourself. Whenever you feel angry, walk away, drink cold water and calm down. Never ever hit your wife. She is the closest family you have, Work things out and compromise. Put your egos away, (especially these Alpha male egos), treat her as an equal partner in life. She is probably going through a tough time which you might not be aware ya.


So hang on ya. Everything will be all right. Mix with positive people and find something to keep you occupied. Dont ever give up because your loved ones are not giving up on you.

This post has been edited by bananajoe: Aug 23 2021, 02:29 AM

first of all how u got 150k savings

i need to know

Have you consider setting up ghost kitchen since you have hawker experience? Many in my housing area that are impected by pandemic doing various business through whatsapp groups, selling breakfast, lunch, selling veggies & fruits, sell farm fresh milk, Starbucks like coffees, kueh, fresh fish from Sekincan, sell plants & gardening supplies.. you name it. If around your housing area, you can deliver yourself, charge for delivery fees. If too far, you can find runner to deliver.

Firstly, move out of the 'comfy' house with your family.

Go somewhere .... anywhere, rent a place and not too expensive and start a new life.

Meet new people, have 'fresh' air ... start a new job ..... any job .... to get you moving.

Discuss with your spouse, convince her you wanna change.