thanks, ill check it out. never read parenting books. but could be good for my mind.

he misses you lah. last time working late in a meeting my colleague get call every 10 mins. each one from different kid. hahaha. kesian.

i have quite a few books on kids, couldn't find time to read it...

there's one about baby's brain that i read after having my son, if i've read it earlier, i think i would have a more enjoyable time with him when he was younger cos that book covers quite extensively on baby's behaviours at different stages and what parents should expect and how to respond to the baby's needs

Share with us before too late

The secret is only 2 words:
time
Patience
These are the 2 things most people can't give their kids nowadays

Because I am here for work actually. Just that the work ended earlier so I could jalan-jalan. Another reason is because of school and their classes

Both of these especially the bolded one. I am guilty as charged

i'm a very patient person... some times i lose my cool and raise my voice also, i feel very bad after that

Sometimes have to raise our voice also to know that they'd cross the boundaries. The only way to show without any physical harm.

my wife half of the time will raise her voice, my boy pretty much numbed liao

i very seldom raise mine, did it only a few times, can see he was very scared and was about to cry... i faster go hug him back

yes patience is very important.

dont always raise your voice. yes its not physical harm, but it is mental harm especially if you do it often.

always keep in mind that they still young, still got more to learn. dont expect 2-3yo son can behave like 10-12yo ones

In the book I'm reading,treating kids like adults have a counter reaction... they will think they are on the same level as u thus will tend to challenge your instructions and education

ive already kinda stopped raising my voice at my son. he already gets the point. now i just tell him "baba is not angry yet. so please stop that." he straight LOL and then stop.

Not sure where I heard from, they said when they're young (before teen) we need to supervise them and scold them accordingly so they wont get off the boundaries. When they're growing (during teen) then treat them and respect them as friend.

Not sure if is applicable or not.

My side wife is the one that always kena bully. She knows I am kinda strict to her so she wont simply bully me lol. In the end imho there should be 1 side is good side (soft) and 1 side is bad side (strict)

for my family im the strict one and my son is sorta scared of me because even i dont really get angry with him. if i say i will do something. always follow through.

'dont eat your food, i will put you farther from our table.' then put him like 1 meter away and let him rage out. after few minutes. 'ok to come back and eat?' 'yes' hahahah.

my wife tries sometimes but he always knows she is bluffing. because she spends more time with him so i guess she cant be doing that all the time. so need to give way to him. once give way one time. he will always remember hahah.

last time i really rage at my wife though when i put him away from the table and her dad quickly brought him back. fuuu. i really pissed off. when they live with us. our kid became a real pain in the ass. cannot control...

This post has been edited by hutazi: Mar 1 2017, 11:00 AM

I agree to this. similar to my daughter. in-laws came in stay with us for a couple of weeks. everything going haywire. haha.
daughter normally sleep at 9-10pm. when they come, 1am also don't want to sleep.

thats correct but i personally think it applies throughout their growth... but i have read mixed ideologies on treating kids as a friend... you treat them with respect, care for them and protect them but they are not your friend, they are your children... there's a need to let them know both of you are from different levels, don't know la... i haven't reach that stage yet

some more different children react differently... so there's no exact right or wrong in educating them, as long as everyone is happy and they grow up to be a respectable adult, that's the most important

Parenting. So much different now and back then.

Back then : when we kena whack by parents = we do wrong thing and parents like *you do wrong thing thats why*

Now : we scold our kids, our parents will be like *why you scold your son/daughter?*

other people just come and play only... after that just give the kid back to you...

they pretty much don't care about the kid and used him as a toy to fill in gaps in their free time... at least my parents are like that...

back then whack first, no talk... some time buta only kena for don't know what reason

now talk talk talk, no whack unless really no choice