Madam Soh Swee Yong, an 80-year-old senior citizen, was abandoned at Hospital Kuala Lumpur. Despite having family and siblings, she lies alone, receiving no visitors since her admission.



Time moves differently in hospitals.

Between the mechanical beeps and fluorescent lights, social activist Kuan Chee Heng walks these corridors where thousands of stories intersect daily.

Today, he shares one that strikes at the heart of Malaysia’s changing social fabric – a story that begins with a name, Soh Swee Yong, and unfolds into a mirror of our society’s evolving values.

“If she were a Puan Sri or Datin Seri, many would come visit her,” Kuan observes, his words cutting through the pretence of modern prosperity.

But Madam Soh is just herself – an 80-year-old woman from Setapak Jaya, now lying alone in her Hospital Kuala Lumpur (HKL) bed.

The Price of Progress: Our Elders Left Behind

When Kuan met her, the story she shared was heartbreakingly simple.

Yes, she has siblings. Yes, she has family. But since her admission to HKL, not a single visitor has darkened her doorway.

Her words, as reported by Kuan, carry the heavy burden of abandonment – downcast, disappointed, deeply sad.

Now, as Malaysia races toward development, another elderly citizen slips through the cracks.

Madam Soh’s next destination: an Indian non-governmental organisation (NGO)-run home in Batu Caves. “Most probably she will end her journey of life there,” Kuan notes with characteristic directness.

For family members who might still harbour a flicker of conscience, Kuan shares her future address: Pusat Jagaan Orang Tua Cahaya Maju No. 2, Jalan Melati 1, Taman Sri Melati, 68100 Batu Caves, Selangor (Contact: Saravanan, 018 2623023).

His parting shot lands with prophetic weight: “As our country progresses into an old, aged country, we will see more of this kind of case. BE PREPARED.”

https://www.therakyatpost.com/news/malaysia...cry-for-family/

This post has been edited by Le Don: Apr 23 2025, 10:24 AM

No children? Her siblings same age as her. Expects her niece or nephew to take care of her?

Minta /k hunt down her family members?

well, if no off spring, really up car liao

unless you are expecting nephew to take care lol

This is the life of singles unfortunately unless you are well off enough to afford your own health care provider.

Or stay with one of your siblings family.


I remember someone single also had this problem when they broke their leg. After treatment in hospital, their friend sent them home and then they just stay in the house in the dark, unable to do anything. Too shy to ask friend to come again. It was only later that friend realised that they were alone that decided to ask to stay with them for a while until it got sorted.

Sometimes family is the one thing that takes care of us when we are down and alone.

This post has been edited by Skidd Chung: Apr 23 2025, 10:33 AM

unless got money, then maybe niece and nephew will take care

Thats why la. If u are single no kids. Be nice to your niece/nephew.

Buy gaming rig 15k as graduation gift. They will remember u their whole life.

Use brain a bit. In family also must do PR.

To be perfectly honest. Not easy to end up old sick and alone. U must have done a lot of fuck up to reach that level.

"Yes, she has siblings. Yes, she has family."

takkan sorang pun tarak datang visit ? haiya

yes .

ayam remember when my dad admit to HKL.

the neighbors were a few chinese unker /aunties.

their son / daughters would come every day , and be there every time to take care of them . The unker/aunties must have done something right .

stuck in the ward with no one is sad . such is life, so short , so unpredictable, fleeting upon our eyes ..

got a lot of medical students come and talk to patient

many ktard SINGLE

soon become like this also

“As our country progresses into an old, aged country, we will see more of this kind of case. BE PREPARED.”

Solution:
Legalise euthanasia
Depopulation
Skynet take over
Cycle of suffering terminated forever

Got Ai robot to take care of them

The coin has two sides.

Ai robot ? not in the next 50 years

Ai robot cannot help u withdraw money and transfer
Ai robot cannot help u go down grocery store and buy food

That’s why don’t dispose off your old ICE car even when bought EV. ICE car can be used as personal euthanasia device when the time comes.

EV better.
Instant crematorium. Let the ashes be blown away.

Even own children may not take care of you when u no longer capable to even change your own diaper. Don’t expect a niece or nephew to change your diaper. Not gonna happen.

Maybe that's why Malay breeds
because they don't want to be disposable when grow old like this.

I did a video shoot for a gambling company in rumah orang tua,
sadly to say, they all look, how to say this .. terbiar?
and all of them are Chinese.
I still remember one old fella got his skull 1/4 gone but still lives.
I live in a equal balance of Iban, Bidayuh, Cina and Malay society for context.

true . next best thing is caregiver .

dun hate the foreigners coming in for this job, coz for sure no local ppl would get this job . taking care of elderly , change pampers etc, is seriously tiring work .

LOL no.

This will encourage strawberrys to commit suicide whenever they break up or Crypto crash.

Burnt to death is worst way to die. Carbon monoxide poisoning is hundred times better.

True... must be genuinely good with niece / nephew. They will come back to you.

Um, not sure whether not doing anything is considered a major F up or not,

(not planning anything, is the same as planning to fail huh... ...)


cause my wife have an elder sister (50yrs) who is unmarried is just plain lazy and does not care to help us cope with our daughters when we needed some short term help (not monetary)... ...

Oh well, the mental seeds i intend to sow into my daughters will not benefit her in any way as well then... ...

This post has been edited by BelaCHAN: Apr 23 2025, 11:20 AM

you ingat suka2 mati meh? damn alot procedure to sign off the approval.

unless she is leaving tons of inheritance, if not wont happen, come visit with fruit basket already very good...

nowadays, unless you die, no one will kesian at you...

In Futurama, there are convenient kiosks. Step in make payment, confirm to proceed.

Love yourself more, stay healthy and NEVER expect help of any kind.

Help comes by, not by BEGGING.

Got kids scare char siew. No kids scare no one take care...owai

Those who expects niece/nephew to take care, they probably too naive not yet seen actual reality around them. Even own children may wish their parents quickly move on after a period of laborious hardship. Taking care of immobile sick elderly is no joke.

Sandwich generation dilemma, elders having longer life and adults getting married late and having kids late leading to financial and mental pressure. So which would you choose ? Some decide to abandon their elders.

walaowei kenot simply generalize like that la

I have a male colleague in his 50s. still single. been helping out with his niece and nephew problem since they was little.
all his niece and nephew exploits him as a way to get out of financial difficulty. he even had to buy diapers for her janda niece.
looks 2/10 so I also don wan gib any shiet

World Top Billionaire also no retire,

Work till almost last day.

B40 mindset all want retire at 40.

Aiyooo surrounded by char siews.

Yes, must listen to both side of the stories.
1) Maybe the auntie very difficult to take care and treat other people very bad.
2) Maybe the siblings and their families also cukup makan saja. How to take care of another person?

First of all, must take care of yourself financially and physically EVEN if you have children. You don't know what will happen next. Reminder to myself too.

probably not cheap, those provider probably charge kaw2 like funeral service nowdays
later payment declined, insufficient funds

just rent one

Or buy cheap rm2k old iswara/kancil

maybe ada story behind, maybe she did something that piss off the rest of relative or brought problems to the family?

The old folks home near my house, they accept the old people for free, everyone has their own story. Some abandon their wife and children 20-30 years ago, some gamble until pokai, some is fiery attitude.

just 10 ringgit worth of charcoal will do the job

what ICE car lol

There may be 2 sides to the coin. May be she has heartless children or sibling. Or may be the old patient was a very bad person in their younger days so their children/sibling don't want anything to do with that person. But the former case may be more common.

I like how all ktard bharat haters conveniently ignore this line as it would pose soalan susah to their racist worldview:



This post has been edited by diffyhelman2: Apr 23 2025, 11:50 AM

Sometimes the reason is just simply no time.

A bed ridden old folk that can't take care of themselves need special attention.

A working family can't take care of them, if they can't afford a maid/nurse, then who will look after them at home?

It is different if the person who needs care only needs it for short term like 1 week compared to needing care 24/7 until they die.

Such problems are widespread as our lifespan increases and there are more life-saving medicines to keep a person alive.

Something so wrong in the family education nowadays. Family education burden cannot be left to be taught by school or religious entity; it must be taught by the family themselves.

can't blame her siblings for not visiting her la. they are likely 80+- age also..

Cukur ada hospital

Alamak ..jus sold off my dad 94 wira manual...

Only when shit happen , people will start thinking about family

Krik krik krik.

to those who want to be single, the money not spent on children better be put inside some savings for retirement village when old ok..

True story - got a single friend now almost 50, spend entire life rejoicing himself travel... now house also don't have. Savings don't have. He does not realize he is reaching the end of his working life... maybe another 5-10 years left before companies will look for younger people already.

that's recipe for old age poverty and abandonment.

To the singles out there... the least you can do is don't let your parents worry for you... save a lot of money for retirement ok

SJKC day day teach confucian filial piety value since 5000 years ago end up old folks home paling ramai terbuang is type ... 20/80

Imagine when he old and bedridden, both of his niece nephew cut ties with him...

This post has been edited by y500: Apr 23 2025, 12:17 PM

My grand aunt took care of my great grandmother but my grand aunt didn't have children to take care of her (unmarried). In her final days she lived with her sister.

Malaysian politicians and leaders dun care

This is why don't breed bodoh!

house , savings, not easy in Malaysia in 2008 financial crisis onwards

Got car aircond, move on in comfortable condition.

Burn charcoal in house, later rot for months left huge corpse mark in the prop. Pity the one inheriting the prop…

Worry by then, ICE car become super rare antic collectibles that only rich to have.

I can see the pattern

Tiger parents pushing kids to study hard 24/7 and find money hard coz they think it is the culture and way of life without considering the kids well being

Later surprise Pikachu when the kids grown up and hating you

Since a lot of east Asian (including Malaysian type-C) people not getting married and only live singles life... Expect to see this a lot on the future in the next 20-30 years...

After tricking the old guy into transferring property and assets to them

If parents truly care for their children, they should not depend on their children in old age. It depletes the children's savings.

whether u single or marriage with kids,

always keep enough money for yourself ..no one give a darn to u when u become liability. enrich yourself first

my mom treats me so badly after decades
I'm not sure whether want to take care of her when she lying down in hospital

What she did to you ?

If nowadays gen y and gen z

It's easily to be single solo and yolo

Legalise euthanasia.

since you are grown up, I guess she didn't flush you down the toilet

so you still indebted to her you know

mohon MCA anjurkan gaythering besar besaran

kalau purata jantan-bentina bukan 50:50, we just force some of them to become achik follower

Hope gov can provide subsidized old folks home in the future

Licensed old folks home already reduced a lot in funding from gomen since Covid.

This post has been edited by Fubar20: Apr 23 2025, 01:18 PM

I say theyre irresponsible and selfish if they expect to be taken care by their nephews/ nieces

Kekwa
Ill just have a dose of fent ready when the time comes.

If childless just make arrangements for old folks home yourself. Don't wait others do it for you.

Maybe especially Chinese, if you have nice 2 storey corner lot landed house under your name, likely someone will come forward to visit or take care.

Then don't.

No one is forcing you to.

In Asia, socially we are obligated to care for our own parents and family, unless they are abusive towards us.

If you don't care for this kind of obligation, then just ignore it.

There is no law compelling you to care for your elderly parents other than societal norms. They can shame you for it, and if you don't care, it won't affect you other than people might start seeing you differently.

Cough some countries got such laws cough

What makes you think that when you're old, your children will take care of you?

It's so delusional when you make kids for your retirement plan.

So many cases when their adult children working outside malaysia, leaving their parents alone.

So many cases parents live in other state and their kids rarely visit them. Some of them only visit them during festive season only.

Having kids are not guaranteed that your adult kids will visit you every single week

KIDS ARE NOT YOUR FREAKING RETIREMENT PLAN.

This post has been edited by xpole: Apr 23 2025, 01:48 PM

perhaps this aunty's situation is diff

but this is the potential future of those who YOLO with their EPF money.. and dont have plan B

Majority mouth say single tfk JAV, but actually with 2-3 kids liao.

/k words can belief meh, MCA man ? U tell me, hahahaha

Will you ?

I would, for sure in a heartbeat. No doubt.

This post has been edited by cms: Apr 23 2025, 02:11 PM

Modern school can only give the most basic exposure; the real cultivation is at home. We should stop blaming the school for moral etiquette guidance; this stuff should be guided by the family. School should focus more on other subjects.

~

This is the extract of the Chapter 1 from Chapter 1 (序致篇) of The Yan Family Instructions (颜氏家训) ~ one of the most extensively written family instruction for Yan's lineage / clan:

Insight from Chapter 1: Cultivating Virtue Through Daily Practice
Core Insight:

Yan Zhitui emphasizes that virtue is not merely theoretical knowledge, but rather a set of behaviors and values cultivated and reinforced through daily practice. He identifies key virtues—such as sincerity, filial piety, humility, respect, frugality, kindness, generosity, and harmony—that must become habitual and natural, woven seamlessly into one's everyday actions and interactions.

Why it Matters:
Virtue becomes authentic only when it is consistently lived out. By intentionally embedding virtues into daily life, these values move from abstract ideals to concrete realities, shaping character, guiding decisions, and stabilizing family relationships.

Modern Application:
Today, people often struggle with aligning their daily actions with their stated values. Yan’s instruction reminds us to bridge the gap between knowing and doing. Regular self-reflection, practical rituals (such as family meetings or deliberate acts of kindness), and clear teaching by example can transform family dynamics and positively shape future generations.

Does she have any limitation on her end at the time of such treatment was given to you? What happened in detail?

single stronk wahmen dun need no man!

Not surprised, the same type that worship money, if can’t bring anything on the table and continue to waste money in terms of taking care of them, better dispose even own mother.

Can save money maaa

Unless father mother got money and properties then it’s a different story.

Really retard

This case not survived by kids, single to date

If most siblings are dead and never keep in touch with extended family over the years this will be a reality for most single folks out there

while i emphatic to her story, it is still one sided and there maybe aspects not shared.

In any case, abandon in hospital is not the correct way to do it.

How will ccp China society cope when majority of the one child policy generation reach old age? Also all those one child family here.

This post has been edited by diffyhelman2: Apr 23 2025, 02:43 PM

This. My late aunt, when she was sick, every fortnight also I went to visit her for almost a year.

She was my “mum” in KL since my parents were in Kelate. Register in Lembah Beringin also she and her husband send me. Every semester holiday also they pick me up and send me back. Even job interview also my uncle drove me to the location (if not accessible by LRT).

My other aunties & uncles. Sick also I don’t give a damn. Die only I go pay respect. That’s about it.

This post has been edited by blanket84: Apr 23 2025, 02:44 PM

Yeah man sobering thought

Hence dont lose contact with your siblings and their offsprings

Might sound selfish but you really might need them down the road

I talked about this with a few single friends of mine, and they told me that since there will be a lot of single old folks in the future, old folks institutions will be a lot common, and they can also look after one another.

Yea, I'm gen Y myself, and I find that a lot of my single peers don't have a care in the world, just simply spending all their salaries every month.

Just remember one thing, never ever transfer ownership to your children as long as you're still in this world.
One of my parents' friend transfered his house to his son who has always appeared to be a good and filial son. Soon after the transfer, his son changed his attitude and stopped visiting his father.

Nowadays, hard enough to even rely on your own children to take care of you, and you're talking about nephews and niece?
Heck, I don't even know how my son will treat me when I'm old, that's why I always tell my wife no need to invest so much on him, we should accumulate our savings instead.

even after I finished spm
till this day she calls me a piece of shit when I meet every time
wtf, this kind of woman never be grateful when everyone around her gives her allowances

This post has been edited by -mystery-: Apr 23 2025, 03:21 PM

Any law that can protect me from getting emotionally abused?

You know yourself best I guess

You the one that open the topic about why ppl don't want to have children, why only one children eggs in one basket