He said he didn't want anything serious yet, and I said okay coz I was still kinda hurt from my previous relationship, so we both agreed it's just non-sexual physical companionship at the moment.

then the next thing he asked was about sxx... and I said I was open to sxx if I liked him enough to do it and both of us were ready.

so I dunno why he ran away. His words and behaviour contradicted each other. Initiated 3 times and cancelled 3 times, and then MIA.

I thought V males should be happy to have found a new gf but turned out he disappeared pulak... lack of confidence? too good to be true?? afraid to make mistakes??? 

Really confusing to me  until I couldn't sleep properly in the past few days.

Anyway, I've decided to just put this aside and move on. Maybe he's just not in the right state at current. If he and I are meant to be, we will be.

yeah, I guess he wants to play, but I make him play at my terms. Otherwise, no game. 

He can find other women who would easily open their legs. It's not like he doesn't have a choice. He does.

You know, most adults are broken in certain parts of themselves, and hence, they are unable to be 100% healthy mentally and emotionally all the time, whether at work or in relationship.

I believe in the 80/20 rule-- 80% of the time, if they are good to me, then they are good. This applies to my ex and other people whom I have relationships/friendships with.

As for the analyst, I wouldn't say he has super low effort, because he does seem like he has low EQ/SQ and fearful-avoidant traits, and he has made multiple attempts to initiate (although still FFK). I have to give him some credits for that.

Yeah, I know right. My stories are stranger than fiction. My ex and friends always say so. I also dunno why I can't live a more 'normal' life.

Previously I already mentioned I'd give him time and chance to prove himself again... since it was more of miscommunication/misinterpretation... so, he'll continue to be part of my life story.

If you don't like the ex part, just skip reading it. Just read what makes you happy and excites you. 

I'm YOLO-ing now and seeing different men. Who says I'm not moving on?