Hey guys, a bit of context since people say I'm an unusual case. I was born in KL, a single child and early in my life my family moved to Terengganu and we live there for over 2 decades until I decided to moved back to Subang Jaya in 2019 where I used to live at as a kid. I thought that by moving back here it would be easier for me to meet people but then the pandemic happened and I've transitioned to a full time online business owner with little incentive to leave the house plus I'm also caring for my now sick parents. I'm an introvert and don't have many friends nor family and whenever I tell my close friends I'm looking for a women to chat and hang out with (they always assume or tease me that I'm looking to marry or have sex so I stopped bringing up the subject). My parents are mixed therefore I mostly speak English and despite being Malaysian, people have been asked me many times of my race and religion probably because I'm nondescript. Being an introvert, I am also camera shy so dating apps are something that makes me uncomfortable.

My question is, how do I meet women in Subang Jaya/KL? I tend to favor bookstores but I'm too chickenshit to approach women there and being an introvert I've never been to clubs or social events (I honestly don't know how). I do have a car and I rarely, if ever go to KL as I'd rather be watching over my parents plus I don't know where to go or what to do there, the most I've done is park in front of KLCC and took a photo at 9pm and drove back home, which is kind of pathetic now that I'm reading what I'm typing!

I've seen so-called pickup artists on Youtube that make it look so easy-- approaching women and asking for their number but I always felt like I'd probably creep them out! With such a small social circle, basically no family members and zero knowledge on what to do in Subang/KL, is all hope lost?

Gym, bookstore, temple/church, animal shelter, soup kitchen.

Lastly dating apps.

start from what you like to do, if book store is your thing, then you can understand better based on which section you found her. if you like sports/hiking, join some groups and find from there.. dating apps is not too bad, get someone to take some nice candid for you while doing something you like would help. the chatting part leave it to chat GPT if you really need it

Find your classmates (from LinkedIn if you lost contact with them). They know you and you know them, it's a lot easier to start chatting with each other, at least from my experience.

Some of your old female friends from Terrengganu may have moved to Klang Valley, you may never know until you check their LinkedIn profile or contact them.

I remember when i firstly started doing cold approach
I circled around the mall for 5 hours and only did one(1) approach
sometimes when i looking back,
It doesnt need to be this difficult

the difference between a rich a poor mindset
Is their focus and discipline
If you think you're not good enough, you'll present yourself as an unworthy entity and people around you will start feeling repel

sign up as a postgrad student

lol this doesn't work for me.. at least in SG

Just be yourself, and start with your circle of friend/relative/co-worker.
Can ask your friend to intro their friends too.

And start to have other hobby/interest other than your job.
You'll need a common interest with your future half.
Else, there's nothing to bond you too and people will ghost you/find you boring after the 1st meeting.

Just go with the flow...you're an introvert that stays at home most of the time, even if there's a match for you (eg. extrovert/outgoing girl whom just go out the whole day and mingle with many guys) may not be suitable for you after several dates.
So just keep finding.
You'll know when there's "click" with the girl.

Go out more often. The best if you join sport events can easily meet new people. Meet as much as possible but only few will stay and be friends with you so don’t restrict yourself okay

Do some personal deliveries

You can break the ice at the bookstore by asking the girl to recommend u some books from yr fav genre.

U find ur same gender friend first, old or new one. Later they can bring u to new programme event activities sports clubs. Then u can go on ur own. Join as much work as possible. Not asking u to be a leader, make ur schedule pack, communicate more. On ur face, u can see changes, the confidence in ur eyes, posture, lifestyle. Attraction happen two way.

I'd say Msia has no culture of picking up random girls. Unless you have god-tier handsome face, you'd most likely be scrubbed aside as a perv. Just start with dating apps. Keep trying and you'll get lucky someday.

use dating apps. i have used it since pre-covid era. it's extremely difficult. you may need to try for 20 years, but you need to meet only 1 person that is willing to love you. is that 20 years of try worth it? i say yes.

go to lclycity.com and filter Subang / KL area.

Do you play any sports at all? Say maybe like badminton?

Then you can try this app called Rovo. You will join other circles of same sports interest. Say someone booked a badminton court with no one to play with. So someone can go on this app to "open" his court for others to join in to play. Sometimes there will be opposite genders joining, so you can to know some of them.

Even if there isn't, at least you can open and enlarge your circle of contacts as you know and meet more people and as it compounds larger, hopefully someone you will be mutually interested in one another.

It is not just badminton, there are also other sports activities.

Doesn't have to be this app, maybe there are other apps or FB groups for different things like those interested in books or books swapping FB group. You'll get more books to read, meanwhile also meet other people or join some reading club.

reminds me of the dude who followed the 2 chicks recently until puchong, and left note at car

fuh.

Your ONlY viable option in 2023 is Tinder for meeting woman. Learn how to take selfie pictures and write a good profile. Always remember be probability rule in Tinder. Out of 100 likes, only 10 will like you back. Out of the 10, you can probably only meet 1 or 2 of them. It’s a numbers game in Tinder.

Good luck

Why? You are in Business school right?

Can attend those fitness class. Aim for those female oriented type of exercise class

Alternatively, cooking and baking class

Attending seminars or those CDP class also can network

Don’t even try those stunts from YouTube pick up artists with their cheesy pick up lines


Malaysia clubs is definitely not the place to apply them

Chances are, u will be treated like a weirdo. Just don’t try it.

School of Physical and Mathematical Sciences...

Lesson for all boys: if you intend to get married and you know your career/field does not have many girls available, it's best to start dating early.

No matter how introvert you are, go out with girls often (especially those you like) just after high school but before you enter university. Keep the connection tight-knit and close till you start dating/married.

Don't end up like me... now only regret... earn SGD, wanna spend MYR on my beloved girl(s), but all got boyfriend already...

Nah bro, I heard from many that Tinder is for hookup, there are better dating apps out there - refer to pinned thread.
I agree about everything else - it's a numbers game and you'll just have to get better with every attempt.

Interesting suggestion, but be careful in showing your intentions. It's creepy if the ONLY reason you're there is to meet girls. Find something you're genuinely interested in, passion is attractive.

Couldn't help but chuckle a little, because this is somehow so adorably innocent.

You're right, your circle is pretty small so the only way is to expand it. And in order to expand your network, you have to get out of your comfort zone and meet people. I know, there are people who dread this. But other than books, what else appeals to you? Seriously, if you're into hiking, I think joining those random Hiking group to meet people, sweat it out and mingle, is a great opportunity for you to get started.

You'll have to look around for certain interest group/ community and try joining a few. Who knows? you might even make new friends and able to have more activities.

Oh yeah, some people enjoys cosplay or anime. You can also consider joining those circle (beware of drama) if you're into those.

Don't get into those YouTube videos where they pickup girls. Don't be surprised that some are staged, and also due to cultural differences, Asian girls may not likely to respond the same way. Watch/ read something that you find will work for you.

Takudan is right, be careful when you talk about fitness class or gym. Approaching other female members with some kind of intent could be wrongly interpreted and if you acted odd, you may be labelled by everyone as a pervert. lol don't be surprised if the club manager asked to see you one day

I find it rather odd that people join activities with sole mindset of looking for potential partner/ date. Go with an open mind to make new friends (male/ female) and expand your network. If you're lucky to meet someone potential, then its all the better. Otherwise, activities should be done with the aim of one's wellbeing, filling interest, learning new skill, having fun etc

Starting always the hardest one but you need to start somewhere else. If you like to go to bookstore, then try start there, start with a place that you familiar with and using dating apps is also a good choice to let you practice how to chat with a girl. For me, i also a introvert but i start talk with girl on sugarbook and others dating apps as well because for me not direct face to face talking, so won't feel so uncomfortable.