Sep 6 2021, 02:11 PM
QUOTE(Blofeld @ Jan 6 2021, 09:15 AM)
Maybe another reason i can think of is because of the misleading advice many ppl give out, even in Cupid Corner as well.
That misleading advice is "BE YOURSELF".
For example, if you are boring, then one need to improve himself. Most girls generally dislike guys who are quiet. How are you going to court girls if you are quiet?
One need to attempt to socialise more, there is nothing wrong to socialise more, to talk more, etc.
Unless you can find someone who is compatible with you, that you are very quiet. But that will be a hurdle and time consuming.
Another example, if you are overweight or underweight, then one should attempt to improve himself to reduce weight or increase weight and groom yourself to make yourself attractive.
It is misleading again to say BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve yourself.
Unless you are able to find someone who is compatible with you.
So, some ppl might remain single because they listen to the misleading advice BE YOURSELF and forever BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve on their personality and their outer appearance.
I like the elaboration on the misleading advice. That misleading advice is "BE YOURSELF".
For example, if you are boring, then one need to improve himself. Most girls generally dislike guys who are quiet. How are you going to court girls if you are quiet?
One need to attempt to socialise more, there is nothing wrong to socialise more, to talk more, etc.
Unless you can find someone who is compatible with you, that you are very quiet. But that will be a hurdle and time consuming.
Another example, if you are overweight or underweight, then one should attempt to improve himself to reduce weight or increase weight and groom yourself to make yourself attractive.
It is misleading again to say BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve yourself.
Unless you are able to find someone who is compatible with you.
So, some ppl might remain single because they listen to the misleading advice BE YOURSELF and forever BE YOURSELF without making any attempts to improve on their personality and their outer appearance.
Just to add on to the misleading advice from another angle - the advices given by the generations before us. The yi mah, gu mah, aunties & uncles used to advice the female siblings or cousins to open their eye big-big, take their time slowly to select the good candidate for husband, select the good one, handsome, don't make the same mistake like them to get married to the yi gong, gu gong, etc. Also, when still studying time, don't get involve with love life or else later get disrupted & cannot focus in the study. It will be a very typical advises not only from your own family but your friends family will tell you the same craps.
The ideal candidate for husband as per their elaboration is almost non existence. Even if there is, the competition will be tough. This is just like the value investing. You are ready to wait for value to emerge for certain stock but everyone else also know when the value will emerge also & they also want to grab. That's is why the value investing is almost non-existence. The poor girls really took their advice seriously to wait & wait , pass due their golden age without given a thought to compromise on certain parameters. Take the time slowly advise got some flaw to it.
Futhermore, the nature arrangement is in such the way that the female to male birth ratio is always higher to enable the population growths. Due to this, if the monogamy is practice strictly, there will always be some female being left to be single for the rest of their life.
The traditional advice probably need some updating just like the apps.
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