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Serious Why some old people still single?, serious question

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calodin
post Mar 29 2021, 12:06 PM

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I'm in my early 40s, not married but have a GF, she's in her early 30s. I think we are ok the way we are and never thought of getting married. I'm working in Shanghai and she followed me and now she found a job as an ID in Shanghai.

I think now marriage is a very brittle institution, I've had friends who married 3 times and then finally learn to be smart after 3 divorces and stayed as partners for the 4th time. I've also had a colleague that has a wife in 3 different countries that he worked in (how he manage that I don't know...please don't ask)

Most important thing is, know what you want in life and don't let others dictate how you should live yours. I've had a few chances to get married when I was younger, but just decided against it. I don't come from a broken family, my mom and pops are still around and they are happily enjoying their retirement.
calodin
post Jul 26 2021, 10:23 AM

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The report says Unmarried..not "Single". Guys in their 40s can still be attached but not married. I'm 43 and my current GF is 30. Are we planning to get married, maybe not. We enjoy each other's company and also our alone time. Most of my secondary school friends are divorced (by most I mean around 65%, because of this tered I went and calculated), and the most stubborn one got divorced 3 times...and now he has a "partner" instead of wife.

1 of these secondary school friends was murdered by the spouse, so basically if you can say if the person didn't get married, the person will be alive and kicking now (ok, this is one of those extreme examples)

But I guess I am lucky, I've never met with any negative views on me being weird for not being married at my age. But on the flip side I have a lot of younger male friends asking why I know so many pretty girls and if I can intro to them. The answer is always "networking" and no..I am not going to introduce to you hamsap fellas.
calodin
post Jul 26 2021, 12:50 PM

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QUOTE(Sasuke95 @ Jul 26 2021, 11:20 AM)
Agreed, that's the plan, no point following the majority marry early and have stunt growth or live a miserable life, worse if financial bottomline is severely impacted from divorce, men got no idea what they're getting into.

Once a good money base has been built, men will be swarmed in choices naturally. Start to reap the rewards, taste different snack whenever you wish, no contract, no obligation.
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Having Financial Freedom is also a very attractive attribute...and a sense of humour and being filial helps also. My GF is from Foshan (we meet due to work)..I guess when you find someone that can speak cantonese in Shanghai, you will become friends quite fast. Her family also is not rushing her to get married, the parents like me enough, and her family is a lot richer than mine. I have an apartment in Shanghai and also an apartment in Foshan, and that is about it for my investment in China. I don't own a car here because public transport is so convenient.

Some people might ask, you are in Shanghai, why didn't you get a Shanghai lady as GF.......well....there is a saying, if you want to get a life partner (for men looking for women) get a southern lady (Fujian, Guangdong) and for ladies looking for Hubby, get a Shanghai hubby.
calodin
post Jul 26 2021, 02:51 PM

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QUOTE(Sasuke95 @ Jul 26 2021, 01:21 PM)
Aren't those insurance or property agents out for making business deals rather than romance? I had dates with them and they end up telling me the business details in the restaurant, very irritating I want to leave. And yes they're pretty much useless, all they have is the body that earned them lots of attention, given enough time they think they're god, hence the entitlement. They truly rely on their physical to the max. Girls with actual substances are a bit tricky to find, at least they contribute to things other than physical.
That's my goal, i plan to achieve that freedom in late 20s, plan is already at late stage, once timing is ready in a few more months to 1 year, I'll harvest it then officially quit job and solely enjoy life, no job, no bs office politics, no work, never lift a finger anymore. Be extremely hardworking and plan meticulously during early years, only to be completely lazy later, a bit of irony huh

When i finally have all the time in the world, I'll dive into the possibility of finding life partner, some places include ukraine, columbia. And you gave me some places to start with, but what is the quality that makes them good?
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Russia and White Russia are good place to date. But its all up to fate, cannot be too mechanical about dating also, not like choosing vege at pasar. So let fate do its work.


QUOTE(mypalm79 @ Jul 26 2021, 02:14 PM)
Yes, i was exploring different dating experiences from time to time. Maybe i am bias, but i had experienced so much in such a short time with different ladies and i can safely conclude, Malaysian ladies have very little value and yet demand a lot from their partner if compare to other regions i posted to such as China, Vietnam, Germany, Australia, Japan and Hong Kong.

I do agree there are some fine ladies here, met a few of them. However, i can't stand being control by them. lol
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If it was up to me, I would avoid vietnam ladies.
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