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 Please help my brother with Bipolar Disorder

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TSdrstranger
post Oct 16 2018, 08:42 PM, updated 7y ago

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Hey guys, been lurking at the forums and I finally registered because I found that there's a lot of good people and good discussions here. The following will be a long story, so please bear with me.

I live with my very elderly father and older brother. My father is retired with very little money and my older brother quit his job about 6-7 years ago when I was still in college. Since then I've graduated and earlier this year have only gotten a job. My brother however, has no education, stays at home and has zero discipline and basically harasses my father with his anger and insults on a daily basis. He wakes up at any hour and is either on the internet of playing his PS4. He has zero real life friends. He is grandiose and believes he is better than anyone around him.

He was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a few years ago but has never followed up with any treatment, counselling or medication. He threatens me and my father verbally and sometimes physically as well. He makes unreasonable demands such repeatedly asking money that we don't have or wanting to buy things we can't afford. Our relatives have stayed away and refuse to communicate with us anymore because of the stigma and my father is too old, frail and tired to do anything about it.

My questions is, how can I get him to be treated? He is totally out of touch with reality and believes the world is corrupt and people are beneath him, and lives safely in his bubble to form his own warped reality. I heard that I can call the police to pick him up to be forcibly treated, but I am the younger brother, not the legal guardian plus a police car coming to pick him up would definitely be the talk of the town since we live in a small neighborhood. What options do I have?
Fat & Fluffy
post Oct 22 2018, 10:31 AM

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you dont have much option i guess... since resources is tight, i think either a NGO, religious org or gov is the only option... it has been a while, so i guess his condition is already very severe... cant give you specific answer but i guess that 3 option is the only one you have... family support is very important too, he doesnt have anyone else... can see youre trying your best but sometimes it can be tiring and frustrating.. dont give up! god bless...
Norlane
post Nov 15 2018, 03:09 PM

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QUOTE(drstranger @ Oct 16 2018, 08:42 PM)
I heard that I can call the police to pick him up to be forcibly treated, but I am the younger brother, not the legal guardian plus a police car coming to pick him up would definitely be the talk of the town since we live in a small neighborhood. What options do I have?
*
It is awful to hear. I am sorry you're going through all these. You have the last resort if needs be, instead of calling the police, some welfare home or nursing home can do this for you at a fee. What I am saying is if your elder brother continually poses a threat to your family, you and your father can send him to the welfare home for long stay.
As far as I know, private welfare home in the suburbs of KL is not cheap, at or above MYR 1000 monthly. You also can refer to psychiatric clinic in government hospital for referral to the welfare home or nursing home.
sweet_pez
post Nov 16 2018, 02:30 PM

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QUOTE(drstranger @ Oct 16 2018, 08:42 PM)
Hey guys, been lurking at the forums and I finally registered because I found that there's a lot of good people and good discussions here. The following will be a long story, so please bear with me.

I live with my very elderly father and older brother. My father is retired with very little money and my older brother quit his job about 6-7 years ago when I was still in college. Since then I've graduated and earlier this year have only gotten a job. My brother however, has no education, stays at home and has zero discipline and basically harasses my father with his anger and insults on a daily basis. He wakes up at any hour and is either on the internet of playing his PS4. He has zero real life friends. He is grandiose and believes he is better than anyone around him.

He was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a few years ago but has never followed up with any treatment, counselling or medication. He threatens me and my father verbally and sometimes physically as well. He makes unreasonable demands such repeatedly asking money that we don't have or wanting to buy things we can't afford. Our relatives have stayed away and refuse to communicate with us anymore because of the stigma and my father is too old, frail and tired to do anything about it.

My questions is, how can I get him to be treated? He is totally out of touch with reality and believes the world is corrupt and people are beneath him, and lives safely in his bubble to form his own warped reality. I heard that I can call the police to pick him up to be forcibly treated, but I am the younger brother, not the legal guardian plus a police car coming to pick him up would definitely be the talk of the town since we live in a small neighborhood. What options do I have?
*
Sorry to hear about the situation you're in... it's certainly challenging in handling your brother. I suggest not to give your brother any money as you're already financially tight. With your father in his senior age and family only relying on your salary, have you checked whether he is eligible for any welfare or government allowance?

You'll need to make sure your brother follows up with medication. Bipolar Disorder is not to be taken lightly. I'm not sure whether this is a good idea but try negotiating with your brother to make sure he takes his meds - for example promise a daily fixed allowance (that you can afford to give him even if it's few ringgit) and he'll only receive the money when he takes his meds. When his condition improved, get him to find a job even if it's a simple task. If he refused to go out to work, see if there's any work/ job that he can do from home even if that means manual labour eg. packing things - stuffs that housewives would do at home for extra income.

No doubt, the best is if you can get him out of the house to follow up with his treatment regularly but very often that's an ideal situation.
soonming
post Dec 9 2018, 05:02 PM

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QUOTE(drstranger @ Oct 16 2018, 08:42 PM)
Hey guys, been lurking at the forums and I finally registered because I found that there's a lot of good people and good discussions here. The following will be a long story, so please bear with me.

I live with my very elderly father and older brother. My father is retired with very little money and my older brother quit his job about 6-7 years ago when I was still in college. Since then I've graduated and earlier this year have only gotten a job. My brother however, has no education, stays at home and has zero discipline and basically harasses my father with his anger and insults on a daily basis. He wakes up at any hour and is either on the internet of playing his PS4. He has zero real life friends. He is grandiose and believes he is better than anyone around him.

He was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a few years ago but has never followed up with any treatment, counselling or medication. He threatens me and my father verbally and sometimes physically as well. He makes unreasonable demands such repeatedly asking money that we don't have or wanting to buy things we can't afford. Our relatives have stayed away and refuse to communicate with us anymore because of the stigma and my father is too old, frail and tired to do anything about it.

My questions is, how can I get him to be treated? He is totally out of touch with reality and believes the world is corrupt and people are beneath him, and lives safely in his bubble to form his own warped reality. I heard that I can call the police to pick him up to be forcibly treated, but I am the younger brother, not the legal guardian plus a police car coming to pick him up would definitely be the talk of the town since we live in a small neighborhood. What options do I have?
*
Call the police
Send him to the nearest facility to get treatment but make sure you are present to sign the forms to get him admitted
TSdrstranger
post Oct 4 2019, 02:09 PM

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QUOTE(drstranger @ Oct 16 2018, 08:42 PM)
Hey guys, been lurking at the forums and I finally registered because I found that there's a lot of good people and good discussions here. The following will be a long story, so please bear with me.

I live with my very elderly father and older brother. My father is retired with very little money and my older brother quit his job about 6-7 years ago when I was still in college. Since then I've graduated and earlier this year have only gotten a job. My brother however, has no education, stays at home and has zero discipline and basically harasses my father with his anger and insults on a daily basis. He wakes up at any hour and is either on the internet of playing his PS4. He has zero real life friends. He is grandiose and believes he is better than anyone around him.

He was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a few years ago but has never followed up with any treatment, counselling or medication. He threatens me and my father verbally and sometimes physically as well. He makes unreasonable demands such repeatedly asking money that we don't have or wanting to buy things we can't afford. Our relatives have stayed away and refuse to communicate with us anymore because of the stigma and my father is too old, frail and tired to do anything about it.

My questions is, how can I get him to be treated? He is totally out of touch with reality and believes the world is corrupt and people are beneath him, and lives safely in his bubble to form his own warped reality. I heard that I can call the police to pick him up to be forcibly treated, but I am the younger brother, not the legal guardian plus a police car coming to pick him up would definitely be the talk of the town since we live in a small neighborhood. What options do I have?
*
Hi everyone, I have an update on the situation but unfortunately it's not a good one.

Unfortunately, my father is getting more senile and due to spending 24/7 of his time with only my brother (and vice versa) he has become brainwashed and would follow whatever my brother wants. For example, my father believes that my brother does not need any kind of therapy and it's totally okay for him to stay at home doing whatever I want (while I, the sole breadwinner am struggling to make ends meet since they both aren't earning any income).

My brother would occasionally threaten my father wanting money, lecturing him for hours on how he deserves more money (from me) and wearing my father down, or even breaking glasses and mirrors.

To this day, it has been 5 years of him doing nothing but stay at home with no education or income, he doesn't go out and even if he does, he will force my father to accompany him.

Since my father does not believe in an intervention or treatment (he insist that my brother is working on a big project, so we should trust him) we live day to day with the same crap, waiting for him to wake up, either manic or in a foul mood. All of our relatives have distanced themselves from us, and my father, who also does not have any friends, does not listen to me anymore.

Is it normal for a 22 year old diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, not taking any medications nor going to any treatment, to stay home without any education, job, cursing or throwing things at any hour he pleases (even when everyone's asleep), complaining about how he deserves more money and how the world is out to get him and wearing down his father? It's gotten so bad that our father is sleeping on the couch for almost a year to monitor him. Does anyone know what I can do about it?


trencher10
post Oct 4 2019, 02:29 PM

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Find the nearest public hospital with Jabatan Psikiatri

Make an appointment with the psychiatric department to discuss application of admission of potentially INVOLUNTARY patient (please, please, PLEASE get all relevant documentation [medical reports, psychiatric reports, IC copy, whatever] in order)

Look under Section 10 route:

Mental Health Act 2001 – Safeguarding the Welfare of the Mentally Disordered

Does a Malaysian with mental illness NEED to be put in a mental hospital?
vyseus
post Oct 4 2019, 02:58 PM

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sorry to hear that, the struggle you are going through is really tough, my advice is seek help fast, not just for your brother and father, for your self also.

We are human, you will have limit on your mental health, you can only hold so much, for you own sake, please, seek support, if family members won't? there are plenty out there to help you.
TSdrstranger
post Oct 4 2019, 03:05 PM

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Thanks guys, I'm very grateful for the replies.

He does have a record with a hospital in KL, it's just that he doesn't follow up with his treatment. Should I go to the hospital and tell them? Last time my father did so, they said they can't help unless the Police bring him there. He's already been sent to the hospital by the police twice, but every time he's released, he takes his meds for two days and then the same crap happens after a few weeks.
trencher10
post Oct 4 2019, 03:17 PM

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Ooooo. Repeat case ini macam.

You'll have to make another appointment with the hosp department that took him in to discuss the situation (especially with the threat of physical destruction/violence). No need to bring your brother yet.
TSdrstranger
post Oct 4 2019, 03:37 PM

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QUOTE(trencher10 @ Oct 4 2019, 03:17 PM)
Ooooo. Repeat case ini macam.

You'll have to make another appointment with the hosp department that took him in to discuss the situation (especially with the threat of physical destruction/violence). No need to bring your brother yet.
*
I'll look into that. Thanks a lot for the article too, I think Section 52 is something I might pursue if he refuse to tone down his rhetoric.
SUSTham
post Oct 17 2019, 01:28 AM

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Consult a homeopathic doctor, and describe your brother's condition to him.

Then ask him to prescribe the remedy for
him in water form, so that you can spike
his drink without him knowing it.

The doctor will know which remedy to give
after listening to your description of his
behaviour as well as physical appearance.

He won't know what is in his water - homeopathic remedies in water
form is just like ordinary water - colorless and tasteless.

The doctor will likely give a very high potency, like Arsenic 1M,
to be given just once a week.

I think your brother will change over time .

I would have done that to my schizoid brother (who was making
my life a living hell) years ago, if not for the fact that his
kids drink from the same water dispenser.



https://www.drhomeo.com/bipolar/homeopathic...rder-treatment/



This post has been edited by Tham: Oct 17 2019, 07:43 PM

 

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