if you have gf or married, later on can break up or divorce...it won't be an issue since a partner can be found again and again, there are plenty more out there...

but your mom?? you only have 1 set of parents. listen to your mom and draw out a long term plan. And 1 thing that makes me suspicious is why the heck your malay gf making marriage as an ultimatum?? how old is she?

I'd figure that if she's not at that age yet, might as well just take it slow and see how compatible you both are. Have you discussed with her about your living style after you both settle down, racial preferences, etc??

for her parents, it's a gain, but for your mom, she's losing you in terms of your culture, your surname etc....you do understand right??