Sorry to hear your got yourself into this sticky situation.


yes, many people now have done away with dowry, or even hugh dinners to "show off".




Try to make time and talk with the would be in-laws. You have financial plans such as shortening your housing loan and preparing to start a family (trust me, kids are expensive), and you want to limit spending for future.

If the in laws can see you are sound in the head, they might probably let this slip. Better to marry their daughter to a man that can think than someone that goes out in a big bang and nothing else later.



I limited my expenditure by booking an exclusive higher end restaurant that can only seat 100. Yes, the pax is costly, but waaaaaaaaaaay less than 50 tables they usually expect. They also allowed us to use their premise for the day so we did the "garden wedding" with the Pastor and limited guest of close friends and family...so no Church wedding.


That said, you need to be careful if the in laws don't see it this way, which is why it is good to talk to them in person, so you can get a feel for them as they would with you. It could spell trouble especially if your would be wife is the timid sort and will side with her parents...it would be an untold nightmare for you.

Goodluck anyway.