Sigh. This is a difficult choice. But I can understand your feelings.

"A man who has not felt his heart lost to a woman, is not a man.. yet."
-Altie <-- hehe sorry, shameless plug. But I *did* come up with that myself.

Before you begin, you must understand the "battlefield". Know what you stand to gain and lose if you proceed further. What do you stand to gain? A girlfriend and possibly a life partner. What do you stand to lose? A dear friend and respect that has been built up for possibly a few years. Are you willing to make that sacrifice for the prize?

If you are, then read on.

Firstly, you must make your feelings known to her. Giving her a portrait of her sketched by you is but a hint. A glimmer of your total message. It's a good start, but now you proceed with the utmost confidence. Do not sway, do not stutter. Your next proclamation to her must be more forceful. But not to an extreme. If you're a movie buff, and you've watched "Kate and Leopold", you'll understand what I say next more fully. (If you have not, no matter, I shall make it as clear and concise as I can).

You've got to make your intentions known as clear as possible.

This is like a battle horn. So.. what exactly do you do? You ask her out for a drink. This should be fairly easy, you've known each other for a long time. You tell her:

"There's something I'd like to tell you. We've been friends for such a long time. I've gotten to know you very well and because of this friendship we've had, I'd like to get to know you better than that. What do you feel about that?"

Pause.

"Of course, if you do not feel the same way, we can still be good friends. I'm just asking for the chance for me to prove myself to you, that I can be relied on to take care of you.

The key is NOT to rush her. We're just opening a door here. We're not here to push her through the door. If she decides she likes your proposition, congratulations. If she decides that either you're not worth it, or that she's not ready to, then my friend, you have to be ready for the fall. I won't lie to you. It won't be pretty. It will be sad, it will be depressing, but GOD DAMN IT, get over it and just be her friend. That's all she wants now. Maybe.. in the future, she may take up your offer. Which depends on whether you're still available, which by then, will be HER loss.

I hope my insanely long post does not make you feel that this is impossible. Go for it. You don't even have to use any of my suggestions. A lot of this "love" business is played by ear. You improvise as you go along. Just make sure you enjoy the ride. It's not the end that counts, it's the ride.

Good luck, dude.

This post has been edited by altie: Oct 23 2006, 05:58 PM

Sounds interesting.

Good thing it wasn't for you.

That's a good start. Not trying to put a damper on your spirit, but love's a lot more than just seeing her interact in public. Alot of it has to do with what you and her do in private (and I'm not talking sex). How you interact with each other when there is no one else around is where the love really counts. If you can live with THAT personality (the one when no one is looking), that's when you know you have love.

But you're off to a good start. Don't get me wrong, I'm not putting you down. To be able to put physical appearance second to attitude and "heart" is a big step to a successful relationship. Keep it up.