Hi all,
Wanna share with you my original speech crafted for a humorous speech contest, titled "Camera Buying Tips from a Nikon Man"
QUOTE
Camera Buying Tips from a Nikon Man
Contest chair, fellow judges, ladies and gentleman
This is the story about Ah Lian.
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Ah Lian wanted to buy a camera.
So, Ah Lian visit the camera shop where his friend Ah Beng works as a sales person.
She asked Ah Beng for advice.
“Ah Beng, Ah Beng, I want to learn photography, should I buy Canon Camera?”
Ah Beng replied: hmm, unless you want to always shoot in the dark, else don’t buy canon.
Ah Lian asked: Why?
Ah Beng: To learn photography, we must first understand what does the word Photography means. In Greek, it means – Drawing with light.
What is Canon promotional tag line? Canon Delighting you always.
De-Lighting
No light how to take photograph?
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Then Ah Lian asked again: Ah Beng Ah Beng. What brand you recommend then?
Ah Beng: You know Usain Bolt? The 100m Olympic champion and fastest man in the world?
Usain shoot and posed with Nikon camera instead of Canon after the 100m race finished in the recent Olympics.
Ah Lian: So Ah Beng, you recommend me to buy Nikon?
Ah Beng: Ah Lian, any people with a right frame of mind will buy Nikon camera, instead of Canon.
Ah Lian asked: Why?
Ah Beng: Because:
If Usain use Nikon
If U sane use Nikon
In sane people use Canon
sane/sān/
Adjective: 1. (of a person) Of sound mind; not mad or mentally ill: "hard work kept me sane".
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Ah Lian then decided to listen to Ah Beng advice and opt for a Nikon Point and Shoot camera
Ah Lian said: Ah Beng, what is the best price ah?
Ah Beng replied: This is the best price already, cant further best, instead I’m gonna give you 4 free gifts.
“I’ll give you a free memory card, a free battery, a free camera pouch and a special free gift after you buy from us.”
Ah Lian satisfied with the offer and decided to go on with the purchase.
After payment, Ah Lian asked Ah beng:
“Where is the special free gift that you promised?”
Ah Lun answered:
“Here you go, FREE plastic bag and DELIVERY”
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Ah Lian went home and find difficulties using the camera.
Ah Lian called ah Beng
“Ah Beng Ah Beng, I dunno how to use the camera”
Ah Beng replied: “Just Point, and Shoot loh, its easy.”
Ah Lian: “How?”
“You shoot photo by gently pressing the shutter button.”
So I just point and press? Then why its call Point and shoot when its point and press?
Ah Beng replied: “Photography is an Art, it’s about embracing our artistry mind without holding back.”
Ah Lian: “Then what it had to do with Point and Press?
Ah Beng: ““This had to do with Man Ego when they go to toilet or doing other stuffs” (Grinn)
Because when they shoot, they don’t holdback, but when they press, they will hold back”
Repeat
“When they shoot, they don’t holdback, but when they press, they will hold back”
“This is similar to photography”
“Photography is about art without holding back. In order to embrace the artistry mind without holding back, those photography people called it Point and Shoot instead of Point and press”
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Now let me summarise, the 4 Camera Buying Tips from a Nikon Man.
1. Do not buy Canon camera, because “Canon De-lighting you Always”
2. Do not buy Canon camera, because “In-sane people buy canon, U sane buy Nikon”
3. Always ask for best price and free gifts
4. Embrace your artistry mind without holding back by buying a “point and shoot” camera.
With that I would like the end my presentation.