Ok hi all.

I have just made this account because I'm too embarrassed to use my original account. As mentioned above, I need help with this problem.

About 5 years ago, when I was 16, I lived in some suburban neighborhood, where we really watched the way we dress. At that age, my body was pretty well developed, advanced more than it supposed to - cut it short, I am big chested. This was not a problem for me, but I noticed something quite wrong with me since I'm not bothered by people (men) looking at my chest. I was... kind of excited and proud... and I have this 'urge' to show more. I now it was wrong, I did found it is really perverted, and abnormal, but I just can't seems to fight it. At first I was dressing normally, a plain short-sleeves T-shirt, and long pants, but intentionally walking with my chest rising up - I loved the attention I got with my male friends...

At age 17 I advanced a little bit, I'm wearing tighter and tighter shirt, showed some more skin, but like I mentioned, I lived among malays and suburban neighborhood, so I have never wear something too revealing. At this point, I think that it was normal for girls like me to dress-up sexy. Again, I loved the attention, but that 'urge' is really pushing me... Everything got worse starting from here - where I found out I had this fetish. One day, my friends was playing prank with me at school, when I was changing in the toilet for co-curricular, they somehow managed to take away my uniform top - both my school uniform and PBSM uniform. So I was left with only bra and long pants. They put the uniforms in an empty class near the toilet, and I was forced to run in that condition, and quickly dressed in the class. Of course I was really pissed at them, but that really made me turned on. Every night from that point I can't stop thinking about the prank. About the excitement it gave - and this advances the 'urge' farther.

So one night, where I was feeling so light-headed, and being pushed hard by the 'urge', at about 2am, I went out from my home, walking. I walk for 10minutes about 200m from my home, make sure nobody was there in the streets, and remove all my clothing except for my bra and panties, and started walking again for another 5minutes, then I ran back to my clothing, dressed up, and went back home. I couldn't sleep that night. I was so excited, so turned on. There was no satisfying this urge. But I felt so wrong, and so embarrassed if anybody did see me. Sadly, this 'night activity' didn't stop there. For a year, at least once a month, I will do this. And the distance I'm walking half clothed is just farther and farther. However, it stops for a while when I've entered matriculation college, but the urge never subsides...

Then when I was 19, 3 nights before I went to UUM, I have done something really radical. I've suppressed the urge so much that I really have to relieve it. So I did. At 3am, I walked to an abandoned playground, it was quite dark, but there's street lights not far. Then, I took everything off. Everything. I walk around the playground 2-3 times, felt really excited, and I did something taboo - I sat on the bench there, and began to touch myself until I 'reached the peak'. Yes. True story. And the urge subsides quickly... I ran back to my home and sleeps soundly, full of satisfaction.

SORRY BUT THIS IS NOT SOMETHING I MADE UP. BUT SINCE THAT NIGHT. I FELT THIS IS REAALLYYY, REALLLLLYYYYY WROOOONNGGG!!!! I couldn't help myself. I did it again until today, once every month. I never had shared this with anybody, nobody knew. So I can't help myself stopping it. I had a bf now, we never had sex, since he thinks I'm 'pure' and all.... I'm really afraid if anyone knew about this someday, if that happen I really would hang myself. People know me as a very shy person, never wear anything revealing (since I turned down the urge with the night activity), but this dark side of me... I just know one day I'll be exposed, and my life would be over! Please help. I have looked up through the internet and discover that this fetish is called 'exhibitionism', but them the english people, rather than do something to stop, embrace it. They just live with it, until they die.

I don't know if there's someone like me in this country... male perverts are a lot here... but girls... I don't know. I'm a girl and I really had to protect my modesty and all, I know what I did is so not normal, I'm weird, pervert whatever. I just needed help to stop. Any advice or anything to share would be really, really appreciated. Sorry for the long post. Thank you in advance.

masturbation can lost ure virginity?

So one night, where I was feeling so light-headed, and being pushed hard by the 'urge', at about 2am, I went out from my home, walking. I walk for 10minutes about 200m from my home, make sure nobody was there in the streets, and remove all my clothing except for my bra and panties, and started walking again for another 5minutes, then I ran back to my clothing, dressed up, and went back home.

wanna get rape one day

Practice self control. Edited, didn't notice this was under girls club. Derped.

This post has been edited by SPuNx: Mar 3 2012, 02:09 AM

you revealed your university and places where u did ur activity, so i would suggest you edit that to prevent any bad thing happen on you, better be safe than sorry

wow... i salute you as you have the courage to tell it out loud (at least write it in public forum), i can feel that you are struggle really hard. i think everyone has their dark side and me myself also have my own fetish...

but as other said, it's quite dangerous on what you are doing. i mean you are compromising your safety. how long have you start dating this bf? maybe after sometime the urge will go away with the love and care from ur bf?

I know, it's dangerous, and I DO WANT TO STOP.

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Added on March 3, 2012, 2:21 amSigh... if only it's that easy...
p/s: derped?

This post has been edited by SirenHeart: Mar 3 2012, 02:21 AM

keep ureself busy, dont let ureself to be alone

No, I didn't do it in my uni. Only when I'm at home. I got back to my home every month.... it seems the only place I did was back home. Where I know every street and most of the people. So to control the urge I've tried to not to went back home so much, but for how long...? I can't avoid my family...

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Added on March 3, 2012, 2:31 amI don't have the courage - I've created a fake account, and using my friend's laptop at her home right now... so any smartass over there will trace the ip back to the wrong person...
Yes, I hope for that too... just dated him for 4 months now... well... the problem is, I never like to be touched by others... even my bf... he never advances because of this... see how much problem I'm in now? I don't like to be touched, but take risk exposing myself for everyone to see. So abnormal.

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Added on March 3, 2012, 2:34 amI was never alone at home, but, at 2-3am, everyone was sleeping...everyone in the neighborhood. Like it or not, at that time, I'm all alone

This post has been edited by SirenHeart: Mar 3 2012, 02:37 AM

i thought dis only happens in europeans country where nudity iz a norm there and you can go to any clothing optional beach without being a freak...

Wow, hard to believe that this is real.

Going to a psychiatric or counselling together with your bf is out of question?

I think you better be cautious, doing that at night.

Take care of your safety first.

Hello everyone.

I am not a lowyat forumer, but my bestie send me a link to this thread and I felt compelled to answer the call for help.

First of all, it's not really that surprising that you had this fetish. Everyone had their own preferences and weird behavior, only that we live in Malaysia, our people are not so open about this. (not open at all actually)

My reply to Siren,
You are not alone girl, because, I too had this exhibitionism problem. Had, as if, I managed to keep it under control.

My first experience with a bikini at a public beach when I was 17, was the trigger for this fetish. I became so aroused at that time I had to go to the toilet and 'relief' myself.
And it get worse as I age, I got naked at my uni, office, beach, and many other place. I even let some stranger see me from a far. At one time I drove from KL-Seremban early in the morning without anything on! The reaction of the guy at the toll booth was priceless!
Cut story short, I did far much worse than you did back when I was addicted.

I know this fetish had to stop, it's unhealthy and weird. For 2 years now I've managed to control this urge. What I did:

1. You realize that this fetish is no more than a sexual desire, right? So feed it. Instead from going outside, just 'touch' yourself in your bedroom or bathroom. It's much safer, and the urge will go away. You don't have to run back to your home. Maybe this is not the best solution, but it helps.

2. Sometime I give the keys of my car to my housemate. She always lock her door. So I can't drive myself naked anywhere. In your case, I advice to lock your house door with a padlock and give the keys to your parents / secretly place it in your parent's drawer. This will help to stop you.

3. Take a bath every time the urge is pushing, it helps too.

4. My best advice, share it with someone really close and you trust to keep it a secret.
Take her advice, and make promise to her that you will stop. If you value a promise, it will help you settle down.

I hope this help. Please PM me so we can keep in touch. We can also meet and I will gladly help you.

This post has been edited by Artemis Luna: Mar 4 2012, 02:10 AM

I think rather than you going out to streets to satisfy your urge, better to close your curtain and lock yourself in your room. then you can do what u want...want naked or what not.

think of your safety first..afraid later you'll get harmed.

Believe me, we had a lot of them here, only, based from my experience researching about this, mostly are men. This is the first girl aside from me in this country I found with the problem.

Q&A .. good joke

sorry. I don't get it

wow. just wow.

This post has been edited by shufaz: Mar 4 2012, 03:38 AM

I think you should care for your safety, just lock yourself in your room, and close the curtains, then you can do whatever you want.